The alarm didn't wake me. The anxiety of what I was about to do had me up at six. Being quiet as possible I took a shower, got dressed and left. Having over an hour to wait, not being able to eat and not wanting to see Jude I went to a café and drank coffee. Time is painfully slow when you are waiting for something, especially if that something is not what you want.

It wasn't easy to avoid thinking about what would happen. Part of me wanted to cry. I had agreed to take part in a video. It wasn't just a sex video but bondage, S & M, hard-core sex. What the fuck was I thinking? Skipping out crossed my mind but when I thought of what would happen to Timothy I couldn't bring myself to return home. Images of the videos and pictures I had seen online kept coming to mind, painful scenes. Men crying, men whose bodies were red and marked from being beaten. Men having fists and other insanely large items shoved up their rectums. Was I nuts?

After an eternity I got up and made my way to Timothy's loft. Standing outside the entrance to the building I watched the minutes pass on my phone until it was exactly eight AM. I pressed the button and waited. No one knew where I was or what I was doing. Fuck what a stupid move to keep it a secret. There was no reply. The buzz signaling the door was unlatched didn't sound. Fuck.

Do I press it again? Do I wait? Did I completely fuck up what time I was to be here? Was it a dream?

The interior door opens and I see Him. Jeans, boots, leather jacket and looking hot as hell the man who I had submitted to was in front of me. It was too late to back down. He opened the door and silently I stepped aside. He walked past me as if I wasn't there. I didn't say a word. He walked to the curb and hailed a cab. I walked near him and waited silently. My nerves were going ape shit.

Cab arrives. He opens the door and gets in. The door remains open. I can still run. Instead I step forward enter the cab. He doesn't speak. After a fifteen to twenty minute ride we exit the cab. The building is a typical warehouse type building. Large dark windows, brick, imposing but simple. He opens the front door and we enter the small lobby type area. It isn't much of a lobby really, just an open space with a few mailboxes and signs. There is a set of large double doors.

"If you want to go home now you can. You have the choice but make it now." He speaks clearly and he means it but it is not threatening at all. He almost sounds sincere in offering me an out. His words about the commitment, the people scheduled, the expectation set and the idea of Timothy paying the price are overwhelming. I nod.

"I need to hear you say it."

Looking up into his face I feel the potential for tears. For the first time I see the face of a man, not a Master. He is ruggedly handsome but not classically so. He isn't stern of sinister or mean or threatening. He steps toward me and raises his hand. I flinch as it nears my face. Two fingers gently caress the bottom of my eye wiping the buildup of tears.

"Sam. If you truly don't want to do this tell me now. I do not want to force you into this. If you come upstairs it has to be your own free will."

His words hit me like a fist in the gut. I sniffle and look down. A million thoughts race by again.

"Sam. This isn't about raping you."

Those words were it. That was my fear. After what happened with Ed, and part of me still didn't know if it was real or not, I was terrified of being raped. Another million thoughts fly by in seconds.

Looking up at him I open my mouth, "I am ready."

He smiles. "It will be ok Sam. Really, you will be surprised."

He presses a button, a buzzer sounds and we enter the building. The elevator that takes us to the fourth floor looks original to the building, do I trust a one hundred year old elevator?

It stops and He slides up the rickety gate and slides open the outside gate. There is a small area with newer walls in white. He walks up to a heavy metal door and pushes another button. A moment that lasts forever, passes and the door slides open. A man smiles and greets Him. "Scott. Good to see you! Come in. This must be Sam. Fucking cute. You are one lucky man Scott, you find some hot boys." His demeanor surprises me. The room we walk into is bright and clean with a large wooden front counter. It looks like the front room of a business, an office type business. There are a few chairs, tables, lamps and a plant. Pictures on the walls, like any other office. Except the pictures are of gorgeous men in leather. Hot, hot hot.

"Sam. Welcome. We are excited you are here. First some business to attend to. I need to see valid ID. Here are some forms you need to fill out. Go ahead and sit down and take your time, be honest and when done bring them up to me. If you have any questions, and I mean any no matter how silly, ask me. Can I get you something to drink?"

Shocked by the straight forwardness I just look at him.

"No liquor. Water, tea, coffee or soda."

"No thank you." I am still a little stunned. This wasn't what I expected.

He hands me my ID. "Thanks Sam. First time?"

I nod.

"Relax, you will do fine." He smiles. Scott, come with me while Sam does the paperwork.

They leave me alone. My instinct to flee evaporates. The forms are detailed. They ask personal information such as age, name, and social security number like a job application. Then they ask page after page of really personal information. As I check off boxes marking my sexual experience I realize I have a lot to try. Then comes the section of things I am willing to try. Deep breaths as I mark off the yes box or no box. Piss alone has six questions. Things are listed that I don't know what they are, sounding? I decline fisting and all the piss questions but keep the ones with electricity to a minimum. It could be fun.

The section on pain is one of the longest. I do my best to be open-minded. Finally I finish up and walk to the counter. Evan, the guy who greeted us smiled. "You have the same look most first timers have, don't worry, you will walk out of here just fine. Take a seat, I will be right back."

Sitting and waiting I check out the photographs. These aren't done with a camera phone. They were amazingly well done and so hot I almost felt my dick twitch.

Evan returns and comes to me sitting close but not too close.

"Sam. I know this is frightening. I remember my first time, years ago! You will be fine. We are not some fly-by night company. We have been doing this for over fifteen years. No one has died yet." He chuckles at his joke, which I didn't find funny. His hand reaches out and grabs mine.

"Sam. You will be fine. Relax and enjoy it."

He smiled so kindly at me I actually believed him.

The door opens and a man in jeans and a long-sleeved tee steps into the room. "Sam? Hi. Follow me."

I get up and follow him. He didn't strike me as a Dom, he looked rather bookish. "Before we get started we need to ask you a few questions on camera, strictly legal stuff."

He leads me to the side where a tripod with a small camera sits. "Stand on the X and look into the camera. Good. Now answer the questions honestly. If I sense you are not telling the truth I will call you on it, understand?"

I nod.

He asks me to give my name, birthday and age. He asks if I am here voluntarily. He asks when I last drank alcohol and used any type of drugs, prescription or street. He asks again if I am here voluntarily. I answer all honestly.

"Good. Next is prep. Fluff here," he points to a guy who looks like as feminine as a guy can possibly look without being in drag, "He will get you ready. Don't worry, he looks wimpy but he won't bite."

Fluff smiles and takes my arm. "Nice. Time to clean you up stud. Don't want anything ugly showing up."

The room we enter looks like a locker room crossed with a salon. He instructs me to undress, compliments me on my body and tells me to take a shower. After I finish he has me move into another area and there he begins to clean out my rectum. The first time a guy cleans out your ass is a little uncomfortable, at least for me it was. After he is satisfied he has me sit in a chair and gives me a quick hair cut.

"You are a good looking young pup. Ever had a body trim?"


"Fun for me! Stand up honey."

He moves me around and goes to work trimming my body hair, shaving my balls and making sure I look perfect. He didn't tell me what perfect meant but he was very pleased with his work and takes a couple of photos with his phone, "For my professional portfolio." I doubt him but say nothing. I am about to be filmed in a BDSM video; a few photos on a guys phone wont make any difference.

Handed a robe and slippers I am lead out of the salon and to a large table. Six men are seated. Some dressed in flannel others in basic street clothes. The look up at me and smile. Standing, they greet me introducing themselves, as I promptly forget all their names, and welcoming me. Seated they begin to discuss the day. They had gone over my forms while I was being prepped and knew what I was willing to do and what was not of interest. There were no complaints however they found it interesting I was interested in trying some electrical play but no sounding. I confessed I didn't know what sounding was; this resulted in a few laughs.

Soon four men came up to the table wearing robes. These guys looked like they were porn stars. Built, bearded, handsome as hell and all smiles. They each greeted me with a hug and a pat on the back. I was surprised how they weren't much taller than I was, one was actually shorter. And while they were all solid men, two of them weren't very big. I expected them to all be these giant hulking living muscle.

The next thirty minutes there was discussion of the day's scenes. My fears evaporated as I listened. Answering their questions and asking my own the unknown of what I was about to do was gone. It was very clear, things were scripted and laid out, and they even had a storyboard. Who know BDSM scenes were this broken down?

The director told the men to get ready. They smiled but sat in place. "Sam. Time to take off the robe so they can see what they are filming."

So that was what they were getting ready for, the first view of my body. I stood up and stepped back from the table. Opening my robe the cold air hit me. I laid the robe over my chair and stood naked for all to see. Their response was not loud or crazy. It did leave me feeling good about how I looked and comfortable.

"Ok guys. Get to work."

They all stood, most of them came up to me and offered a handshake, polite ass grab or a little peck on my cheek. I felt a little foolish it was all so polite.

Except the last man. He was one of the porn stars, short but so damn handsome I wanted to kiss him. He smiled and reached for my cock. Groping me, looking at my junk he grunted. "Gonna enjoy using you kid. Fucking hot." He looked up and laid a kiss on me that was powerful. This guy was going to get me hard in no time.

"Sam. Wardrobe."

I followed Fluff into a room full of clothing and leather gear. He dressed me in khakis and a button down shirt so I looked like some fresh-faced college student. A few more pictures, for his professional portfolio and I was off to the set.



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