The Start

First of all, I want to apologize for this chapter taking soo long. I do enjoy this story and as I’ve said ‘I never saw it going beyond the star’s death.’ This second book is a work in progress that takes more time than I like. I went back and read chapter one and two so I might remember why I started. We see it every day, the bullying, the hate, and the behavior that divides us all. This can’t be the new normal.

Things like Trump saying a guy has a weight problem overshadows a kid who takes his life because of bullying, a kid who kills another because of cruel words. The shootings as of late make me sick. This just can’t be the new normal.

Robby’s POV.

I really couldn’t believe the two of them. Jeff was so soft; Donny, on the other hand. Ryan and I had talked after the party trying to figure them out. It appeared to us when we met Jeff and Donny that they were a couple. Donny and Jeff both eyed Ryan. But then seeing Donny and Niki really had us wondering. Was it a big three-way with Little Dean in the middle?

Ryan is such a charmer; he doesn’t even know. He has confidence and he understands all too well how he affects me. After the party, he sang to me knowing just what that did and Niki saw a side of us. Ryan is versatile and we bottom for each other because ether way we get off in a colossal manner when we are one.

My father left my mother when I was five and when I was eight my mother died with me sitting on her lap. My oldest sister and brother-in-law adopted my older sister and me after that and we were a family until my brother-in-law was killed in a hunting accident when I was fifteen. I knew Ryan was the one the first time I saw him.

I had dreamt of him for as long as I could remember; he was the boy in my dreams with the colors. We are twenty months apart but until we went back to, The Willows, the puzzle pieces had not completely fallen into place. We know who and what we are now; our path is the same but where it leads is still uncertain and always has been.

I hate this fuckin disease and I hate what it does to Ryan, more. He doesn’t understand how it is. I know what I need to do but my head gets clouded and I lose track of things like eating and taking a shot. I was in a fog that morning when Niki came out as I was feeding the ducks. I saw her; don’t know if I said anything.

Deep down I knew I should have eaten. I was looking at Niki when my body stiffened; cramping, and the water shocked me. I must have taken a breath. It was not like all the times before when I died; I saw stuff this time. I was so cold.

I knew why Ryan was being the way he was and I should have cut him some slack but. I kind of went off on him. When he slapped me I think the shock masked the pain but the hurt in his eyes sent a shot through me. I remembered back to the only time I ever hit him; 1863.

Ryan had dove in front of a bullet that was meant for me and when he died in my arms I just kept hitting him in the chest. Now here we were and I was so mad at his double standards when it came to me. I hit him back.

Niki really thought she was the boss of everyone. Ryan and I went places; flew all over. We had never been on such a small jet and had never flown private. I liked it. We still had no idea where we were going. Ryan and I still slept in the same bed but it had been back to back since the fight.

I purposely spilled my drink on him and offered to help as we went back to the head. I didn’t give him a minute as I locked the door and dropped to my knees fumbling with his belt and zipper. I was on a mission; his whispers and attempts to stop me were ignored. I found my prize.

Ryan always seems to be thick enough to show his shape in any pants and today was no different. I pulled his shaft out and ran my tongue from the tip to the base then just devoured him. It had been almost three weeks and the best thing in the world is Ryan hardening in my mouth. This wasn’t foreplay, this wasn’t something to tease him; he got my best, ‘I’m sorry’ blowjob.

His resistance lasted only seconds. I know what I’m doing. I understand Ryan has had others but he is my only. After years with him his length and girth I can easily accommodate. I was looking up at him when his head fell back and bounced off the mirror. I know what I’m doing.

He rested his hands on my shoulders like wanting me to stop and then his right hand rested high around my neck and he pulled. It wasn’t like that kind of pull. I couldn’t help but smile around him in my mouth. He pulled until his pubes were tickling my nose and those bull balls rested on my chin. It wasn’t long and his knees locked to hold him up and he breathlessly told me he was going to cum.

No big surprise. I pulled him from my mouth and looked up to his disappointed eyes. “I’m so fuckin sorry, Rye.” And I licked him.

“Don’t apologize like this, Jr.” He told me trying to pull me up.

“I just wanted to get this out of the way, Ryan, so you can rock my world later.” And I went down on him again with a new sense of urgency. He now had me up against the door and was long-dicking my mouth and throat with his hands on the door behind me and arms locked just like his legs.

I loved my hands on his muscled ass cheeks and I worked him harder than he was working me. He’d kind of slowed but I pulled and swallowed around him. I knew he had held back as long as he could and I readied myself for the flood.

The carnal need to cum outweighed his want to be gentle; he fuckin near drowned me. I swallowed his gift then kept swallowing around him until he pulled from my mouth.

“We can hear you, you know? Get a fuckin room you two.” We heard Niki say.

We both laughed as he pulled me up plunging his tongue in my mouth. He wanted to suck me but I helped him take off the shirt I’d ruined and stuffed my favorite toy back in his pants. We walked out to four sets of eyes and smiles washing over us. “What?” came from a shirtless, Ryan.

It was quiet as all eyes were on him. Then he did the peck dance. And the laughter started.

Now Ryan was Ryan. “You know you want to touch them, Niki. Come on, Jeff; Donny, you know you want to touch them.”

Jeff was on the floor holding his stomach, Donny, I think, was wondering if he could do that, Niki held out both hands. Ryan without a shirt will turn heads from both sexes but I know he goes home with me.

Looking at him I realized I must have missed the final drops because a wet spot was appearing on his front and it wasn’t missed by the others. Ryan doesn’t usually flaunt what he has but he doesn’t have to. His biceps are like half cantaloupes that just popped from his arms. His pecks were hard and cut; and yes, he could make them dance. His abs were like a washboard and with his stomach pulled in the V disappeared into the trail. I loved his fuckin body.

It was obvious to me that Niki let the cat out of the bag to Donny and Jeff before we landed. Ryan and I honestly had no idea where we were when we landed; it was warm. This time it was two black SUV’s and Rye and I had our own. We couldn’t tell if we were in Cali or Virginia.

When the door opened I felt Ryan lean back on me for support. I couldn’t believe it; Barry Fuckin Gibb. Ryan doesn’t like surprises, especially something as big as this. In my book; people are people; nothing more, nothing less. Ryan was about to have an attack.

The welcome was more than warm and after hugs, we were directed to our rooms by Niki. Just picking up on little shit it was clear that the three of them had been here before and that just pissed me off.

We hadn’t brought anything for this kind of beach weather but stuff was on the bed. I gave the bed a long look and Ryan saw me. “We can’t.”

I slapped Jeff on the back of the head, “You guys have your own room!” I mocked.

Jeff looked back, “yeah, we do.”

“Bitch,” came from my mouth.

Niki slapped me on the back of the head, “stop it.”

Ryan had been struggling for over a year; I guess since Dean. He is modest with no idea how good he is. He holds back; I don’t know why? On the piano or guitar, he only needs to hear it once and that’s that. His voice; I hear it as a choir. He really doesn’t like new shit; he’s lost in the sixties and seventies.

He could do everything the Bee Gee’s had ever done. And everything Dean Cooper had done. We were in for a hell of a couple days. I never really understood what it meant until Ryan and I walked out on the beach and a suited man followed us.

This would be good for Ryan. I knew what I think Barry knew; Ryan had a lot of shit he needed to unload. This was the time and place. If you haven’t figured it out: Ryan is the air I breathe, without him I wouldn’t exist. His happiness I feel in my own heart and his hurt I feel as well.

I watched Ryan reach for Niki’s hand and I knew when he came back our questions of what we were doing next would be answered. It did hurt a little when he pulled her hand to his lips and kissed it but I guess I would have done the same thing. Ryan has never said if he’s gay; I don’t know about myself. I just love a man.

He commands attention from all those around him as well as the confidence to fill the bill. What I was certain of was coming here; to the Gibb’s, it was good for him. Rye didn’t even know it but coming here was just what he needed. I’d molded into the sand and the Little Guy was molded on me.

Ryan and I have a strong paternal instinct even knowing it will never happen for us. We both love this little guy and feel pride with every new thing he does. When they came back hand in hand Niki reached for the sleeping one and Rye took my hand helping me up.

Knowledge is power, to Ryan. He didn’t want to spoil the surprise so all I knew when we boarded was it would be a long ride. We had reconciled the last night at the Gibb’s. After about three hours in the studio, we were finally in our room. I had taken a nap in the hot of the day so I was full of piss and vinegar and Ryan would have to pull out the reserves.

“Don’t ever question that there is something or someone I love more than you,” he stated looking down on me.

“FYI; Your as stubborn as I am; don’t try to deny it. You always have been.” I told his naked body.

Ryan’s POV:

I was in a mood the night of our house warming party. Robby doesn’t really like singing in front of people as much as I do. We have been together for five years this time; since he’d turned sixteen. A few years ago just before I turned eighteen I inherited my Grandfathers’ estate including all his holdings. I was worth tens of millions.

My father died when I was eight and my mother was a professional waitress. I had been raised in fine dinning houses and that’s where my passion was. But when I graduated I went to work in a lumber mill; that’s where I met Robby. My father had not seen his in twenty-five years and we lived quite well without all of, my now money.

Robby and I see colors around each other and he knew I saw them around Dean. We both see them around the little guy. We think we know why but will never be sure. Robby is about thirty pounds lighter than my one seventy. Where I am auburn brown he is honey blond with amazing blue eyes to my hazel. We compliment each other.

Our house warming was great and I didn’t realize Niki was still here. I started singing to get Robby’s attention. Robby loves when I sing to him and it usually turns into a late night.

After shutting everything down we met upstairs to watch each other undress. Jeff and Robby have the same body style and I don’t know if Robby is my type or if it was just meant to be. Robby with no clothes on is what I can only describe as beautiful. His body is toned with a small diamond of soft hair on his chest.

With a little time, he can grow a real nice full beard; much better than me and way softer. We had taken to shaving each other and from our trimmed pubes down it was smooth all the way up our cracks. I knew how he was going to be and I didn’t even play hard to get. Robby is a sexual force.

I knew my knees would be pinned next to my ears before he was done. I have nothing to be ashamed of at seven and a half inches and about as big around as a toilet paper roll. Robby is built like me down there and he has a bigger knob. Where my shaft has the same girth all the way down, Robby’s is pretty fat at the base.

We have a routine of washing and shaving each other; tonight we cleaned each other inside and out. We always wash each other from behind. I wash his back and then pull him to me and wash his front. We both love this shower overlooking the canal and the bridge with the click-clack of the cars you can’t get rid of. We would dry each other standing then sit to do the lower half. A lot can happen

If I haven’t said it; Robby rocks my world regardless of the position we’re in. He has this way about him that I don’t even think he knows; he feels like a snake inside me and when he cums it’s like a flood of love. From our very first time, we have always cum together and looking at the other. Robby completes me and when he’s not close enough to touch I feel less than whole.

I beat him to bed knowing he wanted me on my back. Our first bed was mine; a king-size water bed. After the first time at, The Willows, we realized a smaller bed had nothing to do with what happened in it. Our new bed is a four-post, queen. The headboard has storage for the things we might need and holds our dual alarm clocks.

As I said, Robby has a big knob that is about the size as his base. He likes to work it in and out of my hole; just the head. It’s not that I don’t like it; it’s just he teases me for too long. Finally, he fed me the rest; slow and in one long push. He knows how I like it.

The way he pushes inside me is so tender and forceful at the same time. I could tell he was tired because of the way he moved and the fact that we had been up twenty hours. I helped him, moved with him, and I was the one to make me cum. Him too. Robby has a way of overdoing it. He was stricken with childhood diabetes this time.

I have a heart condition that has followed me through the ages but, nothing like this with him. He had been insulin-dependent since about a month after he moved in with me. That was the way we lived; we were diabetics. It was hard for him. Sometimes it seemed his pancreas worked and he could go without a shot for a day or two. He’d think he was cured and I knew it was a cruel joke his body would play on him from time to time.

I woke after about three hours untangling myself from him and went down for coffee. I stepped out on the deck and saw Niki doing the same I was for different reasons. She really was attractive in a boyish sort of way with her little boy butt and her kick-ass attitude.

I really couldn’t understand their relationship. These two hot guys living with Niki and Dean; they were like a family. Donny was the spitting image of Clark, off Smallville. Jeff was a beautiful young man. Although he was a little to white for my blood, you could see the way he looked at Donny; he truly loved him.

We all got to know each other and Dean was growing on me and Rob. I like parties and Thanksgiving was my idea. There were a few culinary students and I made the offer to cater for us; I made it worth their while. Of Corse, my mother and her boyfriend would come, Parker and his wife along with Park. Robby would invite his sister but she would decline. His niece and nephew would come.

Rob’s sister, Deb, and I still hadn’t gotten over the court thing. It’s a long story but Parker did all the legal for Rob to emancipate from his sisters custody and my mom became his legal guardian. And Robby took our last name. I was the bad guy in Deb’s eyes because she understood that Robby took my last name for only one reason.

My forefathers’ appreciated literature and our Willow’s library was a huge room with books floor to ceiling. Many were first editions and some were signed and that was why we also invited, Professor Haakenson. He was a lover of books and when Robby brought a few for show and tell he almost fell over. We had furnished a much smaller library here; about the size of a large walk-in closet. I guess really the size of a small bedroom.

Thanksgiving was awesome; more food than twenty people could eat and I sent almost everything home with the ones who cooked it for us. Prof H was appalled that we would have such rare and expensive books on a houseboat. Rob assured him that the house was climate controlled and there was a dehumidifier in the room. It was funny.

The books were expensive when you think about a ream of paper. After we moved in and everything was in place I had a guy come in and appraises it for insurance. He just kept shaking his head. When all was said and done; our houseboat and furnishings came to a cool twelve and a half million. Just so you know that’s a hell of a premium.

It was after the first of December when the unthinkable happened. I had picked out my clothes but hadn’t gotten dressed yet. I don’t know how I heard Niki’s scream but it was one of urgency; I didn’t even hesitate when I stepped out on the balcony. I turned to my left seeing Jeff in only see-through underwear; then I looked down and saw Niki and Donny. She was pointing at a floating body just off our deck.

I didn’t even think as I climbed up on the railing and launched myself into the water. I knew it was Robby. Now our balcony is eight feet and the deck below sticks out twenty-four feet. I saw Donny from the corner of my already crying eyes as he dove in and my feet hit the handrail below but I made it to the water.

By the time I surfaced in the freezing liquid I was twenty feet past the deck. The shock was numbing but I saw Donny pulling Robby up on their deck and that was my new focus. So much shit went through my mind wondering if Robby would be the first to go this time; leave me behind like I had him so many times before.

I was in major panic mode and don’t know how I ever managed; I pushed through it. I knew his heart still beat because I could see his colors. He wasn’t breathing though. I was thinking slowly; where I was and what’d happened, Niki on the phone, and Donny shivering uncontrollably. Then again it was Robby wasn’t breathing.

He had taken his shot like an hour ago and obviously didn’t even have a snack. I was going to kill him for feeding the fuckin ducks before himself. Even with all the stuff for diabetics, nowadays, he still had a really hard time. When I gave him a couple of breaths he coughed, I rolled him and he threw up water on my leg. I remember it was cold.

Everything in me was gone and I started to shake as my body was pulling in on its self and a fireman put a blanket over me. Rob starting apologizing to me and Donny through his coughs. I realized that I was naked and remembered both Niki and Donny looking at me.

After that, I returned to my roll of a few years ago; the fixer. I now monitored Robby’s sugars and what he ate. I knew he cheated at lunch on campus but breakfast and dinner I was in charge. Robby didn’t like that.

Parker took care of our passports and it was a few days before we were to leave. Robby had had enough of my meddling with his diet and he told me in no uncertain terms ‘it was none of my business.’ I slapped him across the fuckin face so hard. It was like being stung by a bee: I didn’t even think. And I started to cry.

“Do you think I want to live without you?” I yelled as he grabbed my hand that was coming back to find his face.

“You haven’t changed a bit in two hundred years; too fucking stubborn for your own good,” I yelled then turned to walk away.

“Oh, no, you don’t, Chancellor.” And I felt him grab my arm and squeeze hard. He spun me and his hand connected with my left cheek. “Do you really want to go there, Rye? I’ve never been sick before, not like you; and what did you do about it, nothing. So get off your high fuckin horse.” And I caught his hand wanting to connect with my cheek again.

“I am doing everything I can this time Rob. I don’t want to leave you behind any more than being left alone.” And know we both had tears.

I had never raised a hand to him and honestly never thought I ever would. But here we were. I mean we’d had words, said things to hurt the other, but never like this. There would be no makeup sex tonight. He knew damn good and well that I was doing everything to change the outcome of the pasts. At eighteen I had a fuckin pacemaker installed, for Christ sakes.

It’s hard to explain but Robby and I have been caught in a loop for hundreds of years. When we found each other ‘The Willow’s’ has always been a comforting companion. He says I have always been a Chancellor and he has always outlived me. I don’t remember as much as he does but I’m not sure I want to. We talked long into the night. I guess we made up and had our say. But things were kind of different now.

“It sure would have been nice if Niki had.”

“If Niki would have, what, slow as molasses?” I heard from the stairs. “Really: you fuckin Ken dolls can’t pack your own shit?”

“It would be nice if we knew where we were going,” I yelled back.

“You’re going on holiday. What more do you need to know? You just can’t bring more than three hundred pounds of clothes or I’ll have to leave some behind. Now, can we get the fuckin led out?”

“She thinks she’s all that and then some, Rye.”

“I can hear you, Robby. I’ll cut you all if you’re not in the car by the time I light a fire under a couple of other slowpokes.”

“Where in the hell are we going, Rye?”

“It’s a fucking surprise you little twit. Now move your tight ass.” We both hear from the bottom of the stairs.

Robby mouthed to me he thought she was gone and we shouldered our bags and saw her walk down the last step. Niki had not had enough coffee or her shower had been cut short; either way, we beat her to the car. It was funny watching her pull Donny by the ear as Jeff carried the bags and she had Dean in the other arm.

Rob and I were both laughing as the boys got in bitching. ‘That wasn’t cool, Niki. It hurt.’ Donny said rubbing his ear.

“What the fuck, guys? We’ve been waiting forever.” I chimed to a look from Niki.

“Driver: The Starbucks on fifteenth and fortieth, if you please.” She needed a fix in the worst way.

Niki’s POV:

I’d reserved a 550 to fly us to Florida and another to carry us across the pond after spending three days with Barry. It’s a hefty price but six hours to get across the country and twelve to get to England, it was worth the cost. I didn’t tell Donny or Jeff what the plans were other than telling them to get passports.

I ordered a car to take us all to the airport. FYI; another plus to flying private; you don’t have to be on time. And that was a good thing because four boys couldn’t be on time if their lives depended on it. Dean and I walked back three times from the car, in the cold, and I promised to cut them all on the last trip.

Before we landed I told Donny and Jeff where we were and I didn’t want them to spoil it for the Chancellors. They were all smiles. A pair of car met us and Robby asked Ryan why they didn’t fly like this. Jeff and Donny just acted dumb when we pulled in the gate.

Barry answered the door and his wife reached for Dean and my arms rested around Barry’s neck and then he turned to Donny and Jeff. He took each in an arm as he looked at Ryan and Robby over their shoulders. Ryan held out his hand and Barry pulled him into a hug.

He pushed back and held Ryan by the shoulders saying, “You hug like Niki,” and gave a smile. “I’m Barry.”

“This is Robby and I’m Ryan. We’re the Chancellors. I’m a fan, we both are.” He said giving us all a glare not liking surprises.

“I’m sure you had snacks on the plane but you all must be starved. I was thinking about sending out for Arby’s. What do you’ll think?”

I rolled my eyes; Jeff did a fist in the air, Donny, lifted his knee and brought his elbow down saying, yes. Ryan and Robby had nothing.

“Why don’t you all freshen up? Niki, you have Dean’s room and you boys have your room. Mr. Chancellor’s, you can take the next room on either side of the hall.” And we found our spots

We came back together in the hall wearing board shorts and tees, well the boys did; compliments of the house. I knew what to pack. I gave Barry’s wife my idea of their sizes and she picked up an array of shit for them.

I have no idea what the Chancellor’s thought but what I remembered about being here was happy and sad. I really had to go to work when Barry called me. Donny and Jeff’s cover had been blown. But it all worked for the best because I arranging for them to meet up with us in Texas for Willy’s Birthday.

Over the last few months the boys had bonded; all five of them. It was funny listening to them going down the stairs with my boys just loving the shit out of what the Chancellor’s were trying to absorb. Things had changed a lot after Robby’s near-drowning and Ryan called Donny his hero.

“You guys have a room? You’ve been here before? That’s just cold, cold.” Robby said going down the stairs behind Donny and Jeff.

Barry greeted us at the bottom reaching for Dean and motioning the boys past to the back yard. We all sat around a big table with a lazy Susan piled high. Barry reached out and took the hand of his wife and mine in the other and we did the same to connect the circle.

“It makes my heart swell to welcome some of you back to my table and a big welcome to the Chancellor’s who I hope to have the pleasure again. Now dig in.”

I watched Donny and Jeff do just that; Ryan and Robby inspected. Barry noticed and told them that it was beef, cheese, and some were just plain. And there was chicken. Robby picked up one and when he went to take a bite Ryan stopped him. There seemed to be a discussion going on.

Robby reluctantly set it on his plate opening the bun and eating just the beef. In a show of solidarity, Ryan did the same. He ate his beef plane and the same with the chicken patty. And water. I thought about it as I looked at Donny and Jeff. It was extra everything along with the horsy sauce.

I realized that it was all loaded with sugar including the bun, sauce, and cheese. And don’t get me started on the curly fries and ketchup. Donny had created a mountain of mixed sauces and was dipping everything in it. Things are going to change when we get home. Dean sat on Barry’s lap as he fed him little pieces of bun and beef along with letting him drink from his glass.

Barry was one of Dean’s God Fathers’. He was a baby man. We took about an hour eating and talking a lot about a lot of things. The story was shared of Donny and Jeff hiding out here and when Dean and I came. Barry looked at me with a smile

“I hadn’t had so much fun in my life other than performing with my brothers. Elton was here, Stevie, fucking, Wonder,” As he covered Dean’s ears. “It was a high light of my life. And Dean; I didn’t know he was sick, Niki, Honest.” And he wiped his eyes.

I nodded at him and smiled.

He stood and said, “Ryan?” and motioned his head to the Pacific.

I watched them walk out to the surf and they talked for a while with their backs turned. I listened to Donny, Jeff, and Robby play with Dean. I stopped Barry and nodded Ryan on when they came back.

“What are you,” and his hand came up.

“He is so like him, Niki. There are things in him screaming to get out. It’s so sad. You don’t have to but, we’ll be in the studio at eleven.” And I nodded.

Robby was going to watch Dean then Linda offered. We were all in the booth listening when she came in with him and handed him over so she could work the board. We must have heard, ‘can you do?’ A hundred times; and ‘yes’ always followed.

Ryan was good, really good. Barry stood next to him seated at the piano and again I thought of Dean and how he would have been so jealous of Ryan and his ability to play instruments. Robby was just dreamy-eyed watching Ryan. More and more, Ryan was reminding me of Dean.

All four boys were burned by noon the next day. I felt bad for Barry and the security he needed just to enjoy where he lived and he’d ordered a couple of extra guys. Donny and Jeff walked the beach while Ryan and Robby did jet skis. If Ryan wasn’t with Robby he was with Barry. They’d sit in the studio talking and just played softly as they did.

It was on our last night when Ryan reached for my hand leading me to the beach. We walked slow kind of kicking sand as we went along and his hand still held mine softly. He looked back over his shoulder seeing the suit guy.

“Where are we going when we leave, Niki?” He asked not looking at me.

“England.”

Now he was looking at me. “Barry told me about when you and Dean were here. Did he know all those people? Seven tracks in two days? That has to be some sort of record. Barry feels real bad for pushing him on Sound of Silence.” And he shook his head as we kept kicking sand.

“Niki, you have to know that the last few days, meeting Barry and Linda, we will never forget this. What’s in England, Niki?”

I stopped walking and he turned around. I took his other hand and said, “Sit.” We sat in the sand knee to knee and all I could do was look at him and miss Dean more.

“You need to try and stay calm, Ryan. We’re going to spend Christmas at a castle. Well… it’s a home.” And Ryan was trying to get me to just spit it out.

“We’re spending Christmas with Elton and his husband, David, along with their kids.” Ryan’s mouth just kind of slowly dropped, he released my hands, and one went to his chest as the other found the sand like he was going to fall over.

“If it wasn’t you telling me this, I wouldn’t believe you. But really?” I nodded at him.

“Niki, just so you know: I’m not a spontaneous kind of guy. If you haven’t noticed, I don’t like surprises. I’ve been known to have panic attacks.” And I nodded at him wondering just how much I should say.

“Ok.” I said taking a couple breaths. “Get ready for an attack.” And his eyes got big. “There will be a party.” And I watched him. “There is a real good chance that some famous people will be there.” And I recognized the questioning look.

“We’re not talking like the Queen, are we???” He asked seriously wondering. I had to smile.

“I’m sure the Queen won’t be there, but one of her Grandsons might.” And his hand-dug further into the sand. “There will be famous people, maybe a Prince. I can tell you are an old soul, Ryan. You could wind up meeting the mothers and fathers of rock. I really don’t want you to freak; just think of the, who's who,” And I reached over closing his jaw for him.

“I’ll slap you, if you need me to. I am really, really, sorry, Ryan. I should have never done this. You probably can’t even fathom how much Dean was loved. Some of the most powerful people considered him more than a friend; that’s saying something.” And now Ryan’s eyes were closed.

They opened after a minute. “You see him when you look at me; don’t you?” I couldn’t help but nod.

“When I met Dean in Parker’s office we eyed each other. We turned in a circle like seeing our twin for the first time. I really don’t want to go out as the guy who looked like, Dean.” And he folded his hands looking down on them.

“Ryan? Barry told me some stuff the first day; do you feel better having come here and spending time with him?” And he nodded.

“Elton will send me a guest list if you want. You just need to know that you and Robby will be in for the best Christmas ever.” And I waited for him to look at me again.

“There’s more isn’t there?” He said like he knew.