Bird Came Down

Scott sat in Matt’s apartment while the lawyer took out what Scott, not wise in the ways of weed, called the blunt wrapper. Scott said, “Is that like a grape leaf?”

“Sort of,” Matt said, “Now… this is called White Widow…. Which is not to be confused with Purple Widow or Blue Widow. Blue Widow is actually blue by the way,” Matt explained, separating the seeds. “Which is largely a gimmick, and an expensive one at that, so I’ve got not time for it.”

“You… uh are pretty good at that.”

“Well, I do it a lot,” Matt said, lighting. He ran the light along where he’d sealed the blunt with his tongue, and then lighting it, hit the it, and the smoke was strong. He passed it to Scott who put a hand up and then shrugged.

“You were always like that,” Matt said, holding the smoke in and letting it leak from his nose.

Scott took a hit and his eyes went wide.

“But you always smoked it in the end.”

Scott tried to pass it back, but then Matt said, “No, brother, you take a few hits off that.”

The smoke leaked from Scott’s nose and mouth, and then Scott took another hit and passed it to Matt. His head swam and his mouth was numb. Matt laughed.

“You look high as fuck,” he said, taking another long hit. “We’re going to smoke all this bitch and I’m going to give you legal advice.”

Scott felt too dumb to laugh and Matt raised a finger in the air and quoted:

“Now we were talking about making quality time for your kids. Quality time includes days that the father does not work such as weekends as well as evenings during the week. Vacation and holiday time is a critical part of a working father’s schedule.”

“I can do that. I do do that.”

“Can you work half time?”

“Not if she’s working half time.”

“You better have something that says you can work just enough, but support those kids. And you need to have something that says that bitch is crazy.”

“Too bad I can’t turn in the busted condoms as evidence.”

“I bet she’d fess up to it if you asked her.”

The room was filled with smoke, and they didn’t talk for a while and then Scott said, “What else?”

He was a little surprised to see that, even high, Matt was on top of his job.

“Depending on the age of the children, frequent and regular contact may be a must to continue the bonding process.”

“I never—” Scott coughed, “ever—let myself be distant from my boys.”

“I know, man.”

“Where are my boys?” Scott looked around, stupid.

“With Joey.”

“But where did Joey…”

“Fuck it,” Matt said.

“Fuck it,” Scott echoed.

“In situations where both the father and mother work full-time and the children are equally bonded with both parents… but that’s not your situation, no special preferences are supposed to be given to the mother. If two parents have similar work schedules... What was I saying?”

“Right,” Scott answered, glassy eyed.

“Exactly,” Matt said, his finger raised, while Scott took the blunt from his fingers.

“For fathers who travel extensively due to their work schedules, flexibility and make up time is an important part of any custody and visitation schedule…”

“What if I want full custody?”

“You don’t want full custody.” Matt shook his head, crossing the sofa to sit next to Scott.

“But… if I did?”

“Well, you have to be bonded,” Matt said.

“Man, I am so fucking bonded,” Scott said, touching Matt’s thigh, He clapped it over and over again, saying, “Bonded, bonded, bonded,” as smoke left his mouth and he passed the blunt to Matt.

“Well,” Matt said, “It’s all about the judge now. And about what you can prove your marriage was like in the past.”

“I’m bonded!”

“I know! No motherfucker is more bonded than you. But it doesn’t mean you should give up on your children and take whatever custody and visitation schedule is offered to you. If Kim gets crazy we get to make the choice.”

“We!”

“Fucking right we. Are your children a priority in your life or not? That means you do not pawn off the children to your parents, daycare facilities or babysitters... And… I can’t really fucking remember what I’m trying to…”

And then Matt shotgunned Scott’s open mouth, and the smoke went down his throat, out his nostrils. They parted and Scott took a long hit, and then did the same to Matt. This time his dick was stiff and he felt Matt’s hand on it, and then he reached between Matt’s legs and felt him hard too. Scott began to turn Matt’s erection like a joy stick and while they were stroking each other through their trousers they just kept smoking and then Matt crushed the blunt, and pushed himself on Scott and began kissing him as Scott unbuckled his belt.

When the black Jeep swung into a parking space beside the house, and Joey saw his brother and Matt climb out looking like they’d just woken up and were late for something, he ran down from the porch to the street.

“We’ve been looking for you everywhere!” Scott shouted.

“Well, did you think we’d just be waiting at Applebees while you… did whatever you— Shit, you all are high!”

“Shusssssssssh!” Matt put a finger to his lip.

“So you came back to my house!” Scott demanded. “With my wife!”

“How was I to know you’d get fucked up when you were supposed to be—”

“Dad’s home,” Taylor shouted.

Kim came out onto the porch with Nathan and Scott glared at his brother and said, “Coffee. Make me coffee.”

“It’s best if I go,” Matt said. He touched Scott’s elbow awkwardly, and then turned to get in the Jeep. As the car started up, Kim came down to the street and demanded, “What the hell is going on?”

“This is supposed to be your weekend with the kids, Scott,” Kim said, pulling Nathan behind her. “You sit on the phone telling me about how much you love your kids, and then you dump them with your brother so you can hang out with Matt and…” she sniffed him. “Were you getting high?”

“What’s that mean, Mommy? Nathan said.

Taylor bounced off of Scott’s arm singing, “Get high! Get high!”

“Matt is my lawyer,” Scott began.

“Higher!” Taylor sang, “Higher.”

And to Scott’s credit, he began lifting his arm so Nathan could swing on it.

“Your lawyer!” Kim shouted. “Your lawyer. To take my kids from me?”

“To bring the kids back home. You can come too.”

“My life is here!” Kim said.

“How can you have a life here? You don’t even have a job. You live off of me, and my life is in North Fall!”

“You don’t even want those kids!” Kim shouted. She pulled at Nathan who would have fallen if he hadn’t clung to Scott.

“Get your hands off him.”

“You don’t want those kids!” she cried again. “The only reason they exist is cause I tricked you into getting me pregnant.”

Scott and Joey looked at the twins, terrified, but the boys didn’t know what their mother was talking about.

“He wanted to have you aborted,” Kim said to Nathan. “Your dad, who you love so much, didn’t even want you.”

“Shut up,” Scott said. Then he turned to Nathan and Taylor.

“You don’t want us?” Nathan said. “Is that why you’re gone.”

Scott picked up Nathan. He tried to pick both boys up, but rested his hand on Taylor’s head.

“Look at me, both of you,” he said. “That is not true. I left because I had to. If I could, I’d take you with me tonight.”

“He doesn’t love you,” Kim started.

“You stop that,” Joey snapped. “You stop that shit right now. Your dad loves you. We all love you.”

“Can we go with you tonight, Daddy?” Taylor demanded.

“Yeah!” Nathan said.

Scott looked at his brother, and then as Kim said, “See, that’s what I mean,” Scott said, “Yeah. Get in the car.”

The boys cheered and ran to his car and Scott said, “Joey, you get in the car and wait for me, and I’m gonna go get some clothes.”

“You can’t kidnap my kids.”

“No ones kidnapping your kids,” Scott shook his head. “They’re my boys, and you’re my wife, and I’m taking my boys for a very long vacation to their grandparents.”

“We’ll see how this turns out.”

“Yeah, I guess we will.”

“I know the judge,” she took out her phone.

Scott took it out of her hand and slipped it in his pocket. As he headed for the porch he shouted back, “Did you poke holes in his condoms too?

As the sky over them went from deep blue to blue black, and the turning road was nearly engulfed in blackness, Scott declared, “I can’t wait to get home.”

Joey turned around and saw the sleeping boys in the back seat.

“What did happen, though?” Joey said. “With you and Matt? I mean, you guys were gone for over an hour. You said you would be right back.”

“We went back to his place so he could council me about custody and… stuff.”

“And you came back high.”

“Yeah.”

“You got high for an hour and a half,” Joey whispered.

“That’s not quite true,” Scott said.

“Then what?”

Scott took a breath, and then turned around and looked at the kids. They were asleep and so he said, “Joey, I’m gay.”

“Shit,” Joey said.

“Yeah.”

“I’m gay too.”

Scott looked at Joey for so long there was the honk of a truck horn and then he looked back on the road and the kids stirred as Scott steered the car back into the right lane.

They continued driving, hearts beating, then Scott said, “Well…”

“Shit,” Joey said.

“I already gave Mom and Dad grandkids, so they’ll get over it,” Scott said. He smiled sideways. “I did my duty.”

Joey didn’t say anything for a long time. After a while he turned around to see the kids were asleep again, and then he said, “Does this have anything to do with Matt?”

Scott looked back quickly at the kids.

“In high school we almost made out. We had a thing for each other, sort of. A couple of years after Kim had the kids she started cheating on me, and she called me the biggest faggot she’d ever met. And then… I was tired of being straight. Tired of love I’d turned down. Tired of wanting things and not having them. I started messing with guys after that. And that was when I told Matt, and he told me how he felt. But nothing happened then.”

“But it happened today,” Joey realized.

“Yeah,” Scott said. “It happened for about an hour.”

Joey looked at his brother and then he shook his head.

“Fuck!” he whispered. “Fuck.”

“I know.”

“I can’t picture it.”

“I really don’t want you to,” Scott said. A truck passed, a white light filling the window for a moment.

“So… are you guys… an item or something?”

“No,” Scott shook his head. “He knows… That he’s not the one. That… there is someone else. Someone else I loved a long time ago who I never thought I’d have the chance to be with again. Matt was just… unfinished business.”

“But you guys are still friends. Right?”

“Yes. And he’s still my lawyer.”

Joey nodded. He was quiet for a while and then he said, “This guy you’re in love with?”

“Yeah.”

“Is it Felix?”

Scott coughed, and then he said, “Yeah. I mean yes.”

Joey nodded.

Scott turned from staring out the window and looking at his brother realized: Joey is the other guy.

“Great,” Scott heard Joey say, tonelessly. “Felix is great.”