The Clouds in Your Eyes
[Memory, Summer Break after Sophomore Year]
Lyn started to suspect that he had somehow developed a sixth sense that alerted him, specifically, when Brad was near. He was out in the small lawn in front of the house, examining the flower beds with a critical eye, trying to get his mind off the peeling paint and slight cracks that would need a little more than pluckiness of character to fix. His mom had left on a trip with the widower she was still pursuing, so he had been left the king of the realm, not that the realm in question amounted to much.
So, the intense perusal of his domain was interrupted by that sense of foreboding that barely gave him enough time to brace for the worst. He watched in horror as Brad climbed out of his car, a modest model that got the job done – the job being taking Brad where Brad wanted to be.
And apparently now, Brad wanted to be… here. He waved happily at Lyn, then whistled as he walked across the patio toward him.
“Hey man.” Brad hugged him abruptly and held him tight for about a minute, which seemed both too long and too short. “Wow,” he said once he pulled away and took a good look at Lyn, “you look really spooked right now. Wait, are you having a chick over?”
Lyn shook off the stiffness in his arms, reminding himself he had to talk. “Brad, what are you doing here?”
Brad huffed and pressed a hand over his heart. “Aren’t you my buddy, Lyn? You must be his evil twin, because that hurt.”
Lyn rubbed his forehead for a moment. “Did you tell me you were coming, and I suffered a terrible lapse of memory?”
Brad guffawed while taking him by the shoulder and pushing him toward the house, as if he was the host and Lyn the visitor. “No, but we’ve barely met two times this entire summer, and just talking on the phone no longer cut it for me.”
“Wait, how did you know where I lived?” Lyn asked rapidly, still trying to get his mind to function properly.
For a moment, the house before them swam in front of his eyes. The peeling paint, the cracks, the chipped steps, they were all staring at him like myriads of accusing eyes.
“Hey, dude, are you okay?” Brad asked, steadying him.
“Yeah, totally,” Lyn replied, pulling his eyes away from the many problems he had tried to disguise for so long. “Please, come inside. My mom’s away on a trip, so it’s going to be just us.”
“Perfect,” Brad said with satisfaction.
“Did Alexander give you my home address?”
“Did you give it to His Majesty, but not to me?” Brad expressed his disbelief with an outraged gasp. He laughed right away. “No, I just happened to glean it when you were filling out the housing application at the start of the year.”
“Ah, oh,” Lyn barely managed. “I’m sorry my house is such a mess. When mom’s not here, I tend to let myself go.”
Brad smiled at him, squeezing the back of his neck and looking him in the eye. “Lyn, dude, if you ever let yourself go, I’ll take pictures and sell them as proof of miracles.”
Lyn knew that he had to do something with his hands, because they were trembling. So he opted for going straight to the refrigerator. “We have water,” he announced. He picked one of his mom’s brand waters and showed it to Brad as if he was presenting a bottle of old wine.
Brad grabbed it from him and drank without even looking at the label. But he was looking around, and what he had to be seeing made Lyn’s heart shrink.
“We might move out soon,” he started again, “so it’s no use repairing everything.”
Brad shrugged and placed the empty bottle in Lyn’s hand, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “Show me your room. You’ve seen my bedroom at home, so it’s only fair.”
His lips were moist from drinking the water earlier, and Lyn caught himself staring.
“Dude,” Brad narrowed his eyes, “you do have a chick over!”
Lyn reacted too late. Laughing and hooting, Brad shot up the stairs, using the advantage of his athletic body to leave Lyn behind.
“Brad!” he shouted. “There’s no one here, come on!”
He smacked right into Brad’s chest as he hurried to the landing.
“Which one of these is your bedroom?” Brad pointed at the several doors, most of them locked, since they had been turned over time into storage spaces no one ever went into.
Lyn couldn’t hide his relief. At least Brad had had the common sense not to start blasting all the doors open. He took Brad’s arm and pulled him along. It was impossible to keep hiding, since Brad was already there. But he could at least mitigate the damage if he was smart about it.
He opened the door to his bedroom with a flourish. “Ta-da,” he said, forcing himself to smile.
Brad seemed suddenly shy as he hesitated to peer inside.
“Come on, weren’t you curious just earlier? Come meet my ‘chick’.” Lyn did the air quotes, feeling his confidence returning. If there was one part of the house he would never feel embarrassed to show to anyone, it had to be his bedroom.
“Dude,” Brad whispered, slowly walking in. “Forget about chicks and all. Do you really live here?”
Lyn crossed his arms and leaned against the door jamb, feeling his good mood returning. It was impossible for him to handle the whole house, but this room under the eaves was his little corner of order among chaos.
Brad dropped suddenly to look under the bed. Lyn took in quickly the gray comforter. The sharp hospital corners were still in place, as he made his bed every morning with military precision.
“What are you looking for?” Lyn asked, walking in slowly.
“Not even a stray sock to call your friend?” Brad asked, while remaining on all fours and accidentally sticking out his denim-clad ass.
Lyn averted his eyes.
“Not even a cum rag?” Brad continued to express his disbelief.
“Are you going to check for dust bunnies, too?” Lyn moved past Brad and ruffled his hair.
A simple touch like that put him in control. There was nothing Brad could reproach him for inside this room. Lyn walked over to his desk and pushed the dutiful vintage lamp – the same that had been with him through all of his grueling studying throughout the years – a fraction of an inch.
In the meantime, Brad stood up. “Damn, man, you run a tight ship around here.”
Lyn turned slowly. Brad was examining the framed print that made up the only adornment for the empty walls Lyn had paid for out of his own pocket. The stark contrast between the whites and the blues had always comforted him.
“What do you mean?” He followed Brad, who was now slowly taking in the sparse furniture. Lyn gripped the back of the leather chair instinctively.
A shrug followed. “This room is just like you. Neat, ordered, and pretty much a warning not to ask too many questions.”
His knuckles hurt, and his stomach flip-flopped.
“Anyway,” Brad said, performing a pirouette and plopping himself down on Lyn’s bed, “I’m not here to comment on your taste in interior decoration.” He put his hands behind his head and looked straight at Lyn. There was a pensive look in his eyes, unlike his usually easygoing persona.
It seemed that his friend had layers after all, Lyn thought.
“What’s on your mind?”
Brad attempted a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He groaned and let himself collapse completely on top of the comforter, leaving his legs hanging over one side. In what looked like a terrible theatrical performance, he threw one forearm over his face, allowing Lyn’s eyes to trace the perfect shape of his exposed bicep.
“Wow, it must be serious,” Lyn commented.
He could turn the desk chair and sit on it, but he chose to move over to the bed and take up the space left by his friend. Resting his back against the bedpost, he stared at the crown of Brad’s head. His chest ached as his fingers itched to reach out and run themselves through the blond curls as if their owner could ever belong to him.
“Do you ever feel like your family is just way too much?”
The question caught Lyn off-guard. He had wrongly assumed Brad had broken up with his latest girlfriend, but this didn’t seem to be the case.
“All the time,” Lyn replied. “But we don’t choose our families, right?”
“Right,” Brad agreed. “Hey,” he turned on his belly, swinging his feet in the air, and staring at Lyn, “don’t you ever want to just be able to skip a few years ahead? Past all the bullshit?”
Lyn gave Brad a surprised look. “All the time,” he repeated mechanically. “Your folks are awesome, though.”
“Yeah.” Brad sighed and let his head drop on his bent elbows. His hair brushed over Lyn’s naked knees. If he’d known Brad was coming, he wouldn’t have worn shorts. “Awesome until they start pushing their unrealistic expectations on me.”
“What are those?”
“You know, work in finance, bring in the dough, marry a chick and start breeding like crazy. Just because they could only have me, it doesn’t mean that I have to start thinking of starting a football team or something.”
“I think you’d make a great dad,” Lyn offered.
“Really?” Brad lifted his head again.
“Your kids will be crazy about you, mostly because you’ll manage to act like the youngest of them all the time.”
Brad snorted and rolled his eyes. “Hey, I’m here for a pep talk, dude.” But his lips stretched into a genuine smile, his woes seemingly already forgotten. He pushed himself up on his elbows, coming face to face with Lyn. “Why are your eyes so--”
“So what…?” Lyn asked, pulling his head back.
“Are you about to sneeze in my face?” Brad asked, quickly pulling away.
Lyn pinched the bridge of his nose. His eyes were all right, bright and clear like the August sky outside. Maybe with a touch of clouds, but that didn’t matter.
“Brad, sometimes, I swear,” he moaned for show. “I wear glasses, so they get dry.”
“Maybe, one day, you won’t need them anymore,” Brad said, now on his feet, making Lyn look up to meet his gaze.
Lyn congratulated himself for not flinching when Brad pushed the hair away from his forehead and leaned in to make eye contact from up-close.
“Yeah, you’d look great without them.”
“And I’d be blind as a bat. I bet I’d look great bumping into any piece of furniture in my path. My legs would be all bruised, but at least my face would look nice. Now, let’s set the fooling around aside. Are you staying the night?”
“Yep,” Brad said, sparing him the torture by straightening up and moving his hand away.
“Did you bring clothes to change into?”
Brad guffawed. “Nope, I’ll sleep all naked in your bed. I’ll drag my dick all over your scrubbed sheets just to see you break out of character for once and go bananas all over me.”
“Are you sure?” Lyn eyed his best friend with a smile. “I might turn murderous. Still waters run deep.”
“I’m sure,” Brad said, giving him an once-over that made the skin on Lyn’s forearms break out in goosebumps. “Dude, I can barely wait to go back to school. At least, there, I don’t have to see my folks every day.”
“And that’s a good thing,” Lyn said, as if he was waiting for a confirmation.
“Yeah,” Brad said as if such things should never be questioned to begin with. “Let’s order something to eat ‘cause I’m starving. Do they deliver takeout around here?”
Lyn scoffed. “Yeah. We’re not out in the sticks. They do deliveries here.”
Brad threw another cursory look around. “Maybe. But do they do deliveries to the 1950s?”
“You did not just say that,” Lyn gasped and grabbed his pillow to throw at Brad, who dodged skillfully.
Brad returned the favor, making Lyn yelp and struggle to hold onto his glasses.
“Forget about takeout,” Brad said while grabbing Lyn’s arm. “Let’s grab dinner someplace nice. My treat. Hey, have you seen Alexander lately? He’s like in Europe or something.”
Lyn knew exactly where Alexander was, but he shook his head. “I haven’t. And I have no idea where he is.”
TBC
Thank you for reading!
@Derek - it all comes so natural to Lyn, doesn't it? :) If only he looked inward a little more honestly...
@DavidB - I just love writing dialogue... especially during intimate moments. Edging, lol, I see what you did there :D
@Buchanan - he's slowly falling deeper and deeper...
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