Gay Selfies Blog

Guys go inside and out. Go go go guys. Preferably with bulging muscles and other things. In a dreamworld with a wet pink shirt.

Because that is so gay. A wet pink shirt gone semi-transparent.

Trend alert: wet pink pants gone semi-transparent. Is that a trend now that I said it? Damn, I'm not a Kardashian so no.

In this case, muscle is just standing there, which is fine. I mean, would it kill the muscle to notice my new outfit and what I've done with my hair? No, but one can only hope for so much.

Has there ever been a relationship between a muscle guy and a non-gym guy in which they don't get enough space away from each other? I figure working out a couple hours a day would help provide that balance. Plus the several hours of mirror time a day should cover the rest.

I may be in a relationship with several muscle men right now and not even know it because we've totally nailed the space issue proactively. 

Pride parade season is winding down most places. Floats have been disassembled, sequined fabrics folded up, and gay-bashing fascist lunatics have put away their baseball bats. Because they never bought them to actually play baseball.

So it's important to remember that it's always time for a dick parade!

Followed by an ass parade. That works too.

Cock's a muscle too, right? Then add it to the list of what these gym rats are showing off. It's only a matter of time before someone invents crotchless gym shorts.

Why wait to get home to start flashing cock?

It's important to know your angles. Or just take 50 selfies and pick the best one. That works too.

Some of these guys could take 50 selfies and end up with 50 best ones. What a problem to have.

This is the time to remember that if you show off more in the summer, just strictly due to warmth (or vice versa for winter if you're below the equator), then showing off can be year round. Ass is seasonless.

Someone once told me there's a reason besides looking hot that people go to the gym, but I forgot what they said. Maybe diabetes prevention or something? Or looking hot while reducing risk of diabetes? Or just looking hot maybe?

Wait, looking hot is not the alternate reason besides looking hot that people go to the gym for. Clearly I'm flustered here and mixing prepositions and penises.

All six spots in this one go to the same dick. And the guy attached. Because look at him.

What a wonderful guy! Kind, caring, generous, funny, creative, loving. A beacon of hope in dark times. Or maybe he is. I really have no idea. But hey, check out his pecs! And his cock!

Oh my gosh, look at all these guys who accidentally primped and posed for the camera, exposing themselves forever. Perhaps each slipped on some sort of banana peel, precipitating this incident.

And what a magic banana peel it must have been! Because it enrolls a guy at the gym, makes him horny enough to take a selfie, and makes him doubly horny enough to upload it somewhere.

No, Major Abs is not a position in the military. Though it may be a side effect. But clearly, dick raises are a proven way to workout one's core.

That and crunches. As in dick in ass crunches. As in wow, your hole is so tight it's really practically crunching my dick but in the anal context that feels good.

Fucking someone is also a good workout, especially if you're holding a 10 pound weight in each hand while doing it.

Not a vacation from men. A vacation about men. So when you get a day off this summer (or call in sick because you need to jack off all day), it can totally be man-focused. Penis-focused. Whatever-focused you want. Because we all need a vacation sometimes from all that other stuff.

Maybe in that instant a guy takes a selfie and in that instant he shares it out, it's a vacation from his everyday persona. Though with some of these guys, their naked selfie self is more the "real" them than their dressed at work self. Who knows? Men are complicated.

We have a big dick situation and I'm not sure who to call for help. I tried Comcast customer service but as purveyors of internet service, they are really not the best folks to react swiftly to a big dick situation. One might even suggest Internet Service Provider be replaced as a term by Internet Big Dick Provider.

If Comcast is yours, you may want to check your bill to make sure they don't charge you by the inch. Because if they do, this post may put you over your limit.

Hey look, it's a bunch of guys who are not my fuck buddy! Because I don't have a fuck buddy! But I can look, right? And so can you.

Maybe I should focus on having a fuck enemy. They say makeup sex can be the best, but that requires being in a relationship to start, then having a conflict, then making up, then having sex. That's way too much work.

Plus jocks. Because what good is working out if nobody sees. It's like if a tree falls in the forest and there's nobody there to hear it, does it make a sound? Okay, not that because yes it does because that's physics. Plus animals hear it. More like if a jock strap is stuffed to maximum and nobody sees it, then why the fuck didn't that person show it to me because I want to see it, dammit!?

Everyday guys with ever day dick  I hate the word lifestyle when it comes to gay stuff, as it’s identity not lifestyle. And yet, I would not mind a lifestyle involving dick every day. Dick for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Plus on weekends, dick for brunch, which is where the word brick came from. Trust me. I know my homosexual etymology.

It’s like commercial fashion vs. couture. Everyday dick vs. seasonal. Though when people used to have nervous yet somehow carefree sex in parks, that was somewhat seasonal. After all, you can’t slide your dick out the leg of your jogging shorts if it’s not jogging shorts weather. If you’re outside anyhow. Unless you're into shivering. Or live in Florida.

These guys all met up and planned their selfies together, all to make you jack off to them. This is my selfie conspiracy theory. As conspiracy theories goes, it's no less provable than most, and a lot more fun. Plus no men in black hiding alien landings from our knowledge.

Thought the guy sticking his tongue out could be an alien. Possibly the genderless ruler of the planet Dicktron?