Gay Selfies Blog

At what point in his life does a guy look in the mirror and realize that he's a hot fucking daddy and the gay world will be at his feet? Yeah, I know some guys are all about the Benjamins (by which I mean twinks named Benjamin) and don't pay daddies any attention, but I just can't even believe that. I mean, look at these fucking guys!

These guys are porn from head to toe. A good opening line would be "You look like porn, but I bet you knew that already." Or maybe "I wanna suck your cock for hours. And then do your laundry." Guys loooove getting their laundry sucked.

Brrrr, December. But I don't care how cold it is. Whip it out! Yeah. It. And snap it. Selfie those cocks.

And if it really is too cold for an outdoor selfie, go for the indoor variety. Make sure you have complete privacy, crank up the heat, then take a selfie and post it on the internet for total strangers. But make sure you have privacy first of course.

So many men. So many ways to take a selfie. So many reasons to jerk off to them.

You got your camera between the thighs selfie. Perfect when you need to get your cock, balls and asshole all in frame. It's a really practical use of pixels. So if there's ever a global pixel shortage, this is the way to go. Angle it right and you can even get your face in frame.

Mirrors are for a lot of things, like if it's 1984, you can tease your hair sky high in front of one and mousse the hell out of your do, then go to the mall and flirt with 19-year-old security guard dudes until they get at least half hard from the attention. Or if it's 2014, you can snap a selfie in front of a mirror and post it because you want everyone to look at your fucking body now.

Big muscles or small, smooth or hairy, public restroom or private, horny guys are there and snapping away. They want to see their muscles and cocks on film. And they want to post the fuck out of themselves online. To this I say, let me get some glass cleaner and make sure those mirrors are crystal clear. Because I've got some jerking off to do!

Now how come cell phone ads don't lead with guys selfying their nude or even partially nude bodies? I mean I think the "6 Plus" in the new iPhone 6 Plus should stand for cock inches.

But still of this group, my eye goes right to that arm muscle flex on the bottom right. His slightly open mouth. The buzzcut. Those fucking delts, which is short for deltoids as in shoulders as in "he has to wear tank tops because his delts won't fit in a shirt."

My favourite part of this job is trawling through Twitter looking for selfies. I love porn so much, but I always think a hot selfie validates the guy behind the star is a real man. Lucio Saints looks great with his enormous, uncut cock hanging slightly to his right. Fantastic self shot Lucio!