Gay Selfies Blog

Very difficult not to write Salt-N-Pepa because they are everything. But let's focus on guys with salt and pepper hair. And how much we want them to aah push it, puh-push it real good. 

For a melanin loss process that happens naturally, it's not like that certain look is worthy of congratulations. Though some folks will dye away the grey. Which is fine, but they're missing out on folks who are super drawn to that look.

This isn't quite like calling a dick a kink. Because being into dick is a pretty basic thing. Even being into balls is fairly basic since they come along for the ride. Nope. Low-hanging balls. Swinging sack of potatoes. Cum-filled plums. 

I'm allowed to call them things that aren't popular sayings. Soon the world will be shouting cum-filled plums from all the rooftops of apartment buildings that house guys with cum-filled plums.

Or going nonverbal with your interest is fine too. Love is an action, right? So love of low-hanging balls is an action too.

I'm picturing a foreskin speakeasy. Back during prohibition, these were underground illegal bars that served liquor so they had secret knocks and little sliding openings built into the door for the door person to decide if they'd let you in or not.

Well, I want a foreskin one where some guy would have to wave his dick in my face and I could assess if he has a foreskin or not. Though I'd let all the guys in because, hell, they're dicks. But foreskins to the head of the line.

Like a picture frame for a guy's ass and a push-up bra for a guy's cock and sack, jockstraps can do it all. And for those of us with a kink for the fuckers, they can make our day.

There's plenty else they can do too, like soak up a six pack's worth of piss. Dependent on someone sucking up some of the liquid and overall not caring if the pee drips down the guy's ass and legs. 

Jockstraps can also retain a visceral memory of a guy's intense gym workout. Or of the hours he's spent rubbing himself through, and sometimes within, that jockstrap fabric. 

There's that game where someone hides something and gives you clues of hot as you get closer to it and cold as you get further away. I wish I could play that but with finding naked guys.

These guys would be giving me a huge head start though, because they aren't exactly hiding. So the game would probably just be called hot and we've already won.

This guy has super scandalized what was certainly a chaste, unworldly truck driver. It could be perceived as a desperate invitation to be fucked if it weren't for truck drivers being on rather exacting schedules.

Hopefully the mooning was near the offramp to the rest stop so a romantic connection could be made.

In moments lacking in actual romance, I find that just calling them romantic anyway does the trick. Like "Wow, that guy exposing himself at the restaurant is sure romantic." 

These are guys who don't even need to be playing Truth or Dare to do something nude (or nude-adjacent) in public. Because as much as mountain climbers are adrenaline junkies, these are exposure junkies.

Now what the hell would happen if there were a nude mountain climber? That's a lot of adrenaline pulsing. Though it would be tricky to get more than a few feet off the ground without the right gear (that you may need pockets for).

Whether it's lazy "accidental" exposure or full-on, blatant exhibitionism, the gist of it is "look at my cock" as if shouted from the rooftops. 

And if there are several other naked guys on the rooftop at the same time, then "look at the cock of the guy third from the left in the red sneakers" should work.

It's easier to stand out in a crowd of fully-dressed people. Keep that in mind.

Look out, there's a dick! There's another one! And there's a bare ass! 

Duck! Or stop, drop and roll! Or go into a bomb shelter! 

Or stare at the dick and expose yours right back. That'll show 'em! And maybe earn you a date or several.

Luka, Jhonny, Aura and Thomas have one thing in common. They're all voting for the non-racist, non-sexist, non-homophobic, non-xenophobic candidate in all upcoming elections (hint!)  because they love themselves. Oh, and they like to fuck themselves on cam.

And Jhonny likes to spell his name kinda weird. Which, hey, is a great thing. Weird is great! You gotta love weird. Just like you gotta love color-coordinated pink dildos. It's like Nate Berkus himself designed them.

Are these guys as super smooth as their super smooth bodies? Super suave? Super seductive? Super market?

Strike market. I'm in the middle of making dinner right now.

And for dinner, I would prefer to sip aperitif while gazing lustfully and wistfully at these fellas.

Maybe if I stare long enough, one of the will tell me what aperitif means.

Would you go to a restaurant famous for its pecs and dicks? Way better than fish and chips in my opinion, and nobody has to get hurt. Except maybe emotionally when the one night stand turns out to be an actual one night stand.

Who decided on the one night stand thing anyhow? Seems an arbitrary number. Because one is one but is still a number. If you had to have sex with someone twice and once wasn't an option, would you have sex with them once? I mean twice? Or would you need to know them better before you decided?

He takes his position of exhibitionist honor with all six picture slots. Now when can I take my position of honor with all two of his slots?

If you're wondering about his workout, how he stays so lean, it's like that one where you walk around with ankle weights all the time. The extra pounds add to the caloric burn. Except by ankle weights I mean pounds of dick.

Can someone make me an adult-sized man doll toy to play with? Can call it Buff Buddy. Would help if it were alive and all that comes with being alive. 

Like arms to hold me down in position. Pecs to squeeze. Legs to squeeze me. And underwear to "find" in his underwear drawer and perhaps be caught trying on.

I'm here to start a movement. Make that two movements. One the movement of hand on dick. The other a movement in which every selfie brings us closer to world peace. 

Then make that mouth on dick too, which is something I politically support because a person with a dick in his mouth cannot speak ill of another. Though he can suck and give the finger to the bachelorette party that peeks down the gay bar alley and witnesses the mouth on dick. And telling bachelorette parties to fuck off really does bring us all closer together.