Posted 21 Apr 2017
If you could go back in time and use your time-honored pick-up techniques on any of these guys, would they work?
You can rule out a hook-up app being effective. Technically, if you brought your cell with you, it's battery would last for only so long and though there were some limited cell-phones in I think the '70s, the Grindr readout would be very confused and say something like "100 feet and 20 years away."
But more manual pick-up techniques could prove to be timeless. Like pulling your pants down and bending over.
Posted 18 Apr 2017
Prepare for your mind to be blown. And hopefully later tonight, your body will get blown too, but you'll have to find someone else to help you with that.
So the mind blowing thing is what is underwear and is not underwear at the same time? There's a hint in these pics. One big hint. One sweaty hint. One throbbing hint.
Thongs may not be the most practical invention except for the way they practically invite sex. And also hide any underwear lines if someone is checking out your rear view. And also make thong manufacturers enough money from such a small piece of fabric that they can buy several condos full of guys wearing even more thongs.
It's important to combine sex and real estate.
Posted 16 Apr 2017
Most of our friends are in open relationships and three of our friends are in a thrupple. My partner has suggested we look for play buddies in hopes of fully inviting a third into our relationship. I've been very happy with our sexual relationship and I thought he was too. A threesome? Maybe. But a thrupple? No way! What should I do?
-One Out of Three
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Image Credit: Retro Males, Posted 14 Apr 2017
It's a vintage grab bag today, emphasis on the grab. I was just watching a documentary called Strike a Pose about Madonna's "Vogue" video and Blonde Ambition tour dancers. Sure that was a pop culture moment and she did push boundaries (for profit). At one point, she was supposedly going to be arrested for obscenity in Italy. Her regret is that she didn't.
I got to the point after the tour where there was a bunch of legal drama, but my reason these shots made me think of it is because of some glowing, fawning gay guys in it who waxed nostalgic about the gay kiss in Truth or Dare (the companion "documentary" to the tour) as being the first male-male kiss they saw. So I was all, you need to go back in time and look at more damn porn.
Posted 13 Apr 2017
The sign on his front door reads "Gone Fishing" (right next to a sign saying "And Totally Gone Clothes").
I'm about as big a fan of fishing as fish but since I'm presently above water and not fooled by bait, I will honestly be a fool for his bait. Which is a dreadful pickup line if I were to flirt with him on the open water.
He seems like he'd be into it though. And likely to spring a boner. Boners, beer, and whatever the hell name of that fish is he caught. Patrice? Laverne? Sylvester? That would be a good afternoon for him.
Posted 11 Apr 2017
There's a very simple, practical reason to get into calves, especially when it concerns calf watching in public. You're generally looking at a guy from behind so he can't catch you easily and potentially go homophobically crazy at the attention.
Dark but true.
Now when you approach him and offer a calf massage, no promises on the reaction you'll get either way. If you offer a calf humping session, definite promises that you'll get some sort of reaction. Like maybe his calves will twitch in anticipation.
Posted 9 Apr 2017
The other night I walked in on my boyfriend watching porn and jacking off. I didn't know he watches porn, but it bothers me a bit. Shouldn't I be enough for him? Is he bored already? I don't want to cramp his style, but I'm not sure how to handle this.
-The Other Man
Posted 8 Apr 2017
Shakespeare would've asked the same thing. But clearly the answer is both. Start with the innocent looking pouch then pull it off to reveal another pouch then pull it off to reveal dick. And a $20 if the guy's been doing his job right.
These are just aesthetically and sexually pleasing. Like a guy with a great haircut who's smiling at you while he stuffs your mouth with dick.
Posted 7 Apr 2017
I know when I'm going to buy food from a truck or shop I take off everything except my sneakers. At which point it makes sense to pay by sliding genitals on a credit card reader or just ejaculating out of nowhere. As long as the ejaculation to dollar exchange rate is in my favor.
You never know with the economy. Sometimes an ejaculation is only worth 15 cents. If you're George Clooney. Because he has publicly had so many they are devalued. Him and Colin Farrell (who at one point was a well-known actor).
In the meantime, "Welcome to Pennsylvania" says the naked guy. I assume by Pennsylvania he means his seemingly sexually twisted mind. That is a complement.
Posted 4 Apr 2017
Yes, the iconic Converse are definitely boner inducing in the right context, like if a guy's barefoot except for them. And maybe he's sucking your cock at the time. That tends to help.
Something about the vintage asexual simplicity combined with our so complicated modern day cock sucking selves gets to me in a good way. They're pared down like deep down many of us want to be. So much so they don't really offer much support or major functions except the basic. But what a basic.
The way they set off the shins and calves and everything on up can be super seductive. If you get into such things. They're aggressively, simplistically timeless, so stand out from flash-in-the-pan styles. Though there are certainly non-traditional variations and colors out there. Nothing wrong with those.
Posted 2 Apr 2017
I've been dating a guy for a couple of months now and I really like him. Last night he told me that he's made a few gay porn videos and wouldn't mind doing some more as a sideline to his main career. I'm not sure I like the idea of my boyfriend being a porn star. Am I uptight? Jealous? Insecure?
-Star Fucker
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Image Credit: Retro Males, Posted 31 Mar 2017
How many pushups, sit-ups, bicep curls, and squats did these guys do to get their bodies pervert camera ready? At lest 47.
Then add $47.00 and the skies the limit.
Actually, a 20-man gang bang is the limit. Something about that old black and white film could only capture 20 dicks and one well worked asshole at a time.
Posted 29 Mar 2017
There are 21 nominees in the Grabby's "Best Newcomer" category and four them aren't even new to Pornland. Griffin Barrows, Taylor Reign, Jason Vario, and Arad WinWin lead the pack of newcomers and one of these guys has been filming gay porn scenes since 2011. Come inside and see the full list of newcomer nominees.
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Image Credit: Guys In Sweatpants, Posted 28 Mar 2017
After a seven-month break in production, Guys is Sweatpants announced today that they're back. "We took a few months off during a partner transition to rebuild the back end of the site," says site owner Austin Wilde, adding, "there will be noticeable, front-end changes coming soon too." But more importantly, the site released a brand new scene, come inside and see the preview.
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Image Credit: Maskurbate, Posted 28 Mar 2017
For the second time in a little over a month, gay porn site Maskurbate has released a scene featuring straight sex. Ennio Guardi stars in both videos, and the latest called Husband Watches has muscle hunk Nyko watching and jacking while Ennio fucks his wife, played by Vinna Reed.
Maskurbate said in the description of Guardi's first scene called Hot Jock Naughty Plot that Guardi no longer wants to film gay scenes. Is that true? And is Maskurbate going straight, too? I caught up with site owner Pascal and got some answers.