Kink Spotlight: Messy Men

Posted 5 Jul 2017

Splosh. Muck. Mud. Slime. Dripping. Coating. Sticky. Stinky. And most of all messy.

Here's a fetish I absolutely totally utterly do not have. Maybe if I had a huge, private backyard, a garden hose, and a maid. By which I mean a naked guy who cleans. But a naked guy who cleans would not be welcome at these parties. Unless the joke was on him and he ended up messy as fuck.

I do get touch sensation though. And people pay a spa to get a mud bath. And playing with food (though ethically questionable considering all the hungry people in this world) could nonetheless be a fun thing.

Seeing guys muscles all highlighted and shiny from whatever the hell is coating them isn't exactly anti-sexual. It's definitely a thing. But I just don't imagine myself coated in stuff. I draw the line at massage oil.

Still the freedom of it all, the don't give a fuck play, adult-style, is appealing. Maybe a mud wrestling moment with a lean, goofy guy whose ass I could kick would be a  good time. If somehow he got totally messy but I didn't. That would break some laws of physics though, which is my actual fetish.

Something about dicks in motion tend to stay in motion. I think that's physics. Or physical physics anyhow. I'd probably get a big old D in it.