Caleb’s Story
Holy crap, I got thrown into my new job head first! One minuet, Seth was telling me how boring the job could be, the next I was calling 911 to help some bloody kid! Marilee (the lady that Ella works for at the coffee shop) found this guy hiding behind the dumpster, he was bruised and bloody, she brought him to The Village to get him some help. Dang, things moved fast, Seth jumped in to help BA and Rodney clean the guy up, and told me to call 911… I was proud of myself for keeping my cool. While the ambulance and cops were on their way, Seth tried to get more information from the guy, but he wasn’t talking. I remember when I first came to The Village, my parents threw me out, I had nowhere to go, no income, nothing! I was alone and scared crapless… my friend Benji told me about The Village; he told me to trust Seth. If it wasn’t for Benji, I would never have trusted anybody. But… I trusted Seth; It was the smartest thing I ever did. The Village changed my life, they gave me a home, a family, helped me get a job, help me figure out a plan for the future, helped me get into college and apply for grants, scholarships, and financial aid, now they hired me as a summer intern. I trusted Seth with my life.
So… I tried to get through to the new guy by introducing myself to him. Seth didn’t stop me or anything, it worked! He told me his name was Carty (short for Carter). The paramedics and cops showed up fast and did what they could then took the guy to the ER in an ambulance, Seth and I followed them there. They ended up checking the guy in overnight, Seth and I stayed with him for a while, then left late afternoon to get the kids. Yeah, you heard me. We left. We left Carty all by himself at the hospital! They were going to release him in the morning, Seth agreed to pick him up and bring him back to The Village help him get his shit together. That was all good and shit, but he just left him there… alone with his injuries, and his thoughts. He was scared shitless and we just left him there to go home to our families and safe houses.
I was quiet on the way home, I ate dinner with my family in silence, then I went to bed. I just lay there staring at the ceiling until I couldn’t take it anymore. I snuck into Ella’s room, borrowed the keys to Falkor and went back to the hospital. Visiting hours were over, so I had to sneak my way through the halls and up to Carty’s room. He was wide awake, watching TV with this sad, glazed over look on his face.
His face lit up when he saw me, “Hey, what are you doing here?” He asked with excitement, or relief, or gratitude in his tone, I couldn’t tell, but I knew he was happy to see me.
“I couldn’t just leave you here alone all night” I answered. He smiled appreciatively and nodded as I pulled the yellow, vinyl upholstered chair next to his bed. “what are you watching?”
“It’s a Friends marathon. The TV only gets like two channels.”
“Cool” I said as I sat in the uncomfortable chair and rested my arm on his mattress.
He grabbed my hand and said, “Thanks.” I nodded, and ended up staying there all night; we watched TV until we fell asleep (he fell asleep first). We both woke up about 5AM. I told him I needed to get home, but would see him later that day when we picked him up… he thanked me again. It was hard to leave him. I couldn’t believe Seth just left him there in the first place… it felt cold and heartless, so unlike Seth.
As I walked to the parking garage, I realized I hadn’t even looked at my phone since I left the house, I was so focused on Carty. So, I looked at the screen, it was dead. I put the phone in my pocket and found Falkor and drove back home with the radio playing quietly in the background. I was so tired and there was so much crap going through my head that I don’t even remember the drive. Before I knew it, I was parking the car in the driveway.
The front door of the house burst open before I even stopped. I opened the car door and was attacked by Colton, Craig, and Ella yelling stuff at me like, “Where have you been?” Why didn’t you answer your phone?” “You scared the shit outta us.”
Then I felt Ella’s arms around me, “Are you okay?” In my haste to help Carty, I forgot about all the people who loved me… They were so worried. I heard Colton on the phone telling Seth I was home and safe. Shit… I freaked out the entire village on the very first day of my internship.
“I’m fine. I’m sorry, I went to the hospital to see someone, and I forgot to charge my phone.” I told them all as we walked into the house. The coffee was already made, Craig poured me a cup, and the four of us sat down at the kitchen table.
Craig was calm, but stern, “You can’t do that to us.” I just nodded, I felt like shit for scaring them.
I ended up telling them all about Carty, “I couldn’t sleep thinking about him all alone. I couldn’t believe Seth just left him there.”
“Well, what did you expect him to do?” Colton asked. “He made sure Carty was safe, he left him in good hands, then he went home to take care of his own family.”
“That’s kind of the job, Cay” Craig added. “He can’t be with every Villager 24/7.” I knew they were right, but seriously, I don’t know what I expected, I guess it just felt weird to leave Carty there. He was a client. My job was to help him. My job was to make sure he was safe. My job was to guide him to a better life. My job was not to fix everything for him. Shit, this was going to be harder than I thought.
I had a couple of hours for triple S (shit, shower, shave… sorry, the guys in the dorms always said that) before Seth came to pick me up. I cleaned up, got dressed, had a cup of coffee and a bagel, then grabbed my backpack. Seth pulled up just as I was walking out, I opened the door and got in the car, of course the kids went nuts. They were all shouting over each other trying to get my attention… but Seth barely said hello. He was quiet until after we dropped Ali at daycare and it was just the two of us.
“You scared the shit out of us all last night.” He was looking at the road when he said it.
“I know, I’m sorry, I should’ve let someone know where I was.”
Seth was quiet for what seemed like an eternity before he answered, “You can’t be with them all 24/7” He said quietly. I was expecting a lecture, but instead Seth tried to teach me a quiet lesson, it was clear he understood where my head was at. “You think I wanted to leave him there? It was killing me. I wanted to fix all his problems; shit I want to fix all your problems. I want to fix all the guys problems… but that’s not possible, and it’s not my job.” I knew what he was saying, and I knew he was right. But it was still hard. “Listen, this is the hardest part of the job. You do what you can, but you also have to be realistic. I’m glad you went to see him last night, but you scared the fuck out of us.”
“I know, I know, I hear what you’re saying. But this is hard, Seth.”
“If it were easy, they wouldn’t need us,” Seth responded still looking at the road. After a long pause, he asked. “How’s he doing?”
“Good. He didn’t say much but he seemed happy to see me.”
Another long silence that lasted until we reached The Village. Seth parked the car, looked me in the eyes (for the first time all morning) and said. Your heart was in the right place, Cay, but please don’t forget about the people around you… you can’t just disappear. Okay?” I just nodded. Then we opened the car doors and walked into the office for day two.
The office was spotless, BA and Rodney had cleaned up… there were no remnants of the bloody boy who was there the day before.
I was only there a few minutes when Rodney told me to follow him to the second floor. He talked to me as he led the way upstairs to make sure the empty apartment was ready for Carty. “We typically like the guys to stay with a sponsor before we move them in, like you did. But he needs shelter now, and he’ll be safe here.” I was just an intern, and it was only my second day, but Rodney talked to me like we were equals. They all did, Seth, BA… everyone. I helped Rodney do a quick once over of the apartment, opened the blinds, made sure everything was in order, and tided the place up, then we went down back down to his office. He went through some paperwork with me and talked to me about my basic job expectations. “When carty gets back, I’ll meet with him to finalize some paperwork, like we did when you came here.”
“Can I sit in on that?” I asked.
“Yeah, that shouldn’t be a problem,” Then after a pause he continued, “Seth will meet with him after that to help him figure out a short term plan… just like we did when you came aboard.”
I smiled at that. Working with Seth to put a plan together terrified me, but when we were done, I felt so confident and relieved, more in control of my life and future. I felt almost ready to be almost ready to almost take on the world. Yeah, I was still scared, but I saw light at the end of the tunnel… I didn’t feel so alone. Now, I have a home with Craig, Colton, and Ella, I’m in college, and Seth is my mentor.
“Do you think I could sit in on that?” Seth told me I could sit in on sessions if it was okay with the client… that was the part of the job I was most excited about. It was only day two, but I thought I’d ask. Why not? Right?
“You’ll have to ask Seth, and he’ll need to clear it with Carter” Rodney answered. “Ask him… Carter seems to trust you.” It felt good to hear that.
Just then, Seth poked his head in the door, “They’re releasing Carter, I’m going to pick him up, you want to come along?” He asked me.
HELL YEAH, “I do” I answered as calmly as I could. I followed Seth to the Atlas, when we were on the road I asked, “Do you think I could sit in on your first sessions with Carty?”
Seth answered quickly, it was clear he had already thought about it, “I’ll ask him when we start our session. If he’s good with it, I’ll call you in.” I could hardly contain my smile. “But you need to understand that your role is not to be his friend, it’s to help him. It’s easy to cross that line.” Then Seth told me about his internship with a psychologist in Milwaukee, and how he became friends with one of the doctors patients, Elliot. “The lines can get blurred, but you’re training to be a professional… never forget that.”
“I won’t. I just… I just didn’t want the guy to be alone. I know what that’s like,” then I thought for a second, “You know what that’s like.”
Seth was thoughtful before he answered, “I do know, we all know, and what you did was a nice thing. Buuuuut… it is easy to get so sucked into helping others that you forget about yourself.”
I totally didn’t get it, “I have no clue what that means.”
Seth was ready with the answer, “You have a life. You have people who love you. You need to think through things and consider how your actions impact others.”
“So, I should’ve thought about my family.”
“That’s part of it, Ella, Colton, and Craig were worried about you. But it’s more than that” Seth said sternly, “It’s about safety. Taking off to help a stranger without telling anyone where you’re going was dangerous. You also need life/work balance. You can’t fix everything for everybody… that was the hardest thing for me to learn.” We talked all the way to the hospital, the last day had been difficult for me, and Seth was really making me think through everything. Before we got out of the car, I promised Seth I would think through things more… and I meant it.
When we got to the hospital, Carty was dressed, sitting on the chair in the corner of his room (the one I fell asleep in next to his bed the night before) waiting for us. Shit, everything Seth said to me fell outta my brain when I saw a bruised up Carty looking sad and anxious to get the heck outta that place. I just wanted to wrap my arms around the guy, hold him, and help him with anything he needed… I wished I could fix everything for him. Seth saw it on my face and put a hand on my shoulder and whispered quietly, “remember your role, you’re a professional” His eyes were locked to mine, I nodded in understanding.
“How you feeling?” Seth asked.
“Good” Carty said as he stood.
“You ready to get out of here?”
“Um, yeah, but where are we going?” He asked.
Seth explained the process. I think he kind of stopped listening after Seth told him they had an apartment for him at Harrington House, and a job for him at BroMax Candle Company. I sat in the backseat of the Atlas squeezed between two car seats, while Seth gave Carty the full rundown of what to expect. “Hey Caleb,” he shouted back to me, and our eyes met in the rearview mirror, “Why don’t you tell Carty about working at BroMax.”
I paused for a minute, then said, “I loved it there. The guys are cool, the work is fun…” Blah, blah, blah, babble, babble, babble. I just went on and on, I could see Seth’s eyes smiling in the mirror, Carty had turned and was looking me in the eyes. He was smiling, he even laughed at a couple of my work stories. By the time we got to The Village, Carty seemed almost happy… definitely less freaked out. I did that. As soon as we walked into the office, Seth took Carty to the therapy room and I met with Rodney about some things he needed done.
We only get like two minutes into our meeting when Seth poked his head in and asked Rodney if he could spare me. “Carty is good with you sitting in on his session” Seth said. “I think it’s a good idea, he seems more relaxed when you’re around.” I couldn’t contain my smile. This, this. THIS is what I came here for. To learn, to help, to be part of the process that saved me. I leaped off my chair and almost ran into the therapy room. Seth grabbed the back of my shirt. “Slow down cowboy.” He spoke to me quietly in the hallway, “Cay, you’re here to become a professional, as far as Carter knows, you are a professional, so you need to act like one… fake it ‘til you make it” he said with a smile… I’m gonna call it a proud smile. He gave me some basic instruction about sitting and listening, speaking when asked to, being careful not to blurt things out that might shut the conversation down, etc. “Follow my lead,” Seth said. “If you have something to say that you feel will help, then give me the signal. Think through your words before you speak.”
“Got it” I said and nodded my understanding once again, then said, “Hey Seth, thanks for trusting me.”
“Of course,” He smiled. I expected him to say something like ‘don’t make me regret it,’ but he didn’t. He just led us into the therapy room.
Carty was waiting for us and looked happy to see me. We said hi again, then Seth explained the plan for the session, and the desired outcomes. “The bottom line, Carter, is that today is about making sure your safe for the short term, and maybe starting to talk about the long term… that can wait until the next session if it needs to” Seth said with a comforting smile, then he got more serious. “I need you to be one hundred percent honest with me about everything so I can help you. Cay is going to sit in, like we discussed, but if at any point that feels uncomfortable, let us know and we can continue with just you and me.”
I broke the first rule and blurted out without signaling Seth, “It won’t hurt my feelings I promise.” When I realized what I did, I looked at Seth expecting him to be scowling, but he just smiled and nodded. His smile said something like ‘I’ll let that one go’ or ‘it’s okay this time.’ Seth was a very expressive guy and could say a lot without words.
Seth sat in one leather armchair, me in another, and Carty across from us on the leather sofa. Seth started, his voice was low and comforting… I remembered that voice from my first session. He made me feel safe and welcome. “Carter, I don’t know much about you” he said.
Carty smile and said, “You can call me Carty.” I dunno shit, but that felt like a good start.
“Carty,” Seth said with a smile. “I know you’re from Connecticut and went to Wake. I know you rode down here with some guys you did’t really know, went to a club to party, and ended up with the wrong guy who left you in the alley… and… I know your parents cut you off.” That’s all I know.” He just laid it all out there, then, “So let’s start with your parents, why are you here instead of in Connecticut talking to them?” He asked. Seth was direct, regardless of all the shit Carty had been through, Seth stayed on his mission to learn.
“I told you” Carty said, he wasn’t rude, he was just stating fact. “They cut me off when I dropped out of pre med.”
“Have you talked to them about your decision since telling them?”
“I tried calling my mom like fifty times and she never answers. I only called my dad twice, both times he answered the phone with, ‘Did you decide to go back to pre-med?’ He hung up both times when I said no.
“What about your brother? Can you call him?”
Carty just sat there thinking for a moment, “Probably.”
“Does he know you’re gay?”
Carty shook his head, “I didn’t tell him. but he probably knows; besides he wouldn’t care. But my parents probably told him not to talk to me… he’d never go against my parents.”
“Why don’t we give your parents a call together, they might be more accepting than you think” Seth said, although I wasn’t sure he believed it. “I know as a parent I would sure as hell want to know if my kid needed help.” Seth was giving them the benefit of the doubt.
“No!” Carty said louder than anything else he’d said since we met. Then he took a breath, “Not now at least. Okay? I need some time to think.” Well, at least didn’t slam the door completely, I guess that was progress. Right?
I just sat there and listened to their conversation trying to follow what Seth was trying to do. After he talked about his family, he asked about friends (Carty didn’t say much). As the conversation went on, it was clear that Seth was trying to find a support system for Carty. He very gently pushed Carty into at least considering reaching out to his family, and dropped the topic there. Seth was amazing to watch, he had a clear agenda; figure out what Carty had to work with, then figure out what else he needed. He pushed Carty to think, but knew when to stop.
Next, they talked about Carty’s immediate needs; shelter, food, a job, etc. Lastly, Seth planted the seeds for Carty to think about his future… What he wanted to do with his life (he kept saying he wanted to be a film producer), what had to happen for him to do it, where he would go to school, how he’d pay for it, What help he needed, etc. I had a similar conversation with Seth when I first came to The Village.
“Okay, that’s enough for today. Thanks for being so honest with me, Carty” Seth said with a smile as he set his pad down on the table between us. “I’m going to invite Rodney into the room so we can get you set up with a place to stay, food, and a job for now… sound good?”
Carty’s eyes lit up. He knew The Village would help him, But I don’t think he expected that kind of help so fast. “Really? Yes. Thank you” Carty gushed… the relief on his face, and the change in body language was so obvious, it was amazing. That’s why Seth and The Village were so successful… they fixed our immediate problems, but never let us lose sight of the future, the long game.
When Seth went to get Rodney, I thanked Carty for letting me sit in, “I’m glad you were there Thanks” He said a back. “All this attention is kinda freaking me out, it’s scary as fuck.” I don’t think I’d heard him swear before, it made me smirk. Before I could even reply to that, Seth was back with Rodney.
“Hey Carty, you look good” Rodney said with a smile as he sat down next to him on the couch. Carty thanked him, then Rodney just jumped right in to. Seth worked with the guys on their emotional wellbeing, and he and Rodney worked together to get them what they needed. They were an amazing team… especially with BA in the shadows handling details. “I have one of the apartments on the second floor ready for you, like Seth told you.” He pulled out some paperwork, “You can stay there for the next couple of months while you figure out your long term plan” Carty’s eyes kind of glazed over as Rodney moved to the next thing. “We have a temporary job lined up for you across the street at BroMax Candle Company, Cay will take you over there this afternoon to introduce you to Ricky, your supervisor” He pulled out more paperwork. Rodney set him up with a cell phone and a prepaid gift card with $300 to hold him until his first check.
“And when you get settled in, we can sit down and talk about the future, I can help you figure out tuition and crap like that if you need it” he said with a grin, then looked at me, “Right Caleb?”
I took the prompt, “Yup, they helped me.”
Then Rodney turned to me and said, “Cay, can you take him up to the apartment and get him settled on, then take him over to meet Ricky and the team at BroMax?”
“Got it” I said, happy to have a role. Carty followed me through the office towards the stairs.
“Hey” Seth yelled behind us, I turned around and he threw me the keys to Beetle. “When you’re done at BroMax, take him to get clothes and groceries. You can drive the Beetle home when you’re done, I need to go get the kids.” Shit, they threw me into the fire and I loved it. I felt like part of the team, not just some gofer like I would’ve been at any other internship.
I took Carty to meet the guys at BroMax, then to get groceries and clothes for work. It was about six o’clock when we finally got back to Carty’s apartment. “You got everything you need?” I asked as I walked towards the door. He nodded. “Are you excited about your new job?”
Carty was overwhelmed, “Shit, I’m excited about all of it” He said, then got serious, “I can trust you. Right?” He almost whispered.
“Yeah. What’s up?” I had no idea what to expect.
“Are these guys legit? I mean they’re not setting me up for some criminal shit, or sex trafficking, or something crazy like that, are they? You’d level with me, right?” My response was bad… I laughed out loud.
“Oh, you’re serious” I said still chuckling. “I know it’s a lot, but they’re legit, Seth is awesome… hell they all are.” Then, I told him my story and finished with, “You’re not in this alone anymore.” Carty gave a sigh of relief, like a weight had been lifted. “I gotta get goin’, and you gotta get some sleep, you got work tomorrow.” He thanked me, and I left.
I walked down the steps and out to the lot. I was about to get in the Beetle and head home when Hugo pulled up and jumped out of his red Jeep.
He shot me that sexy grin and asked, “Hey! You eat yet?”
To be continued…
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