Fear, Love, and Hate

NICK

How long had I been holding on to that hurt? How long had I been hiding those feelings? Last night was rough, to say the least. I'd slept through plenty of storms since then, so why did that one have to bring all that back. I feel the emotions rising inside me and my chest starts to burn, but with a groan, Dean shifts his weight and pulls me closer to him. I sign and breathe deeply; feeling the relaxation wash over me. Drifting back to sleep I can't fight the smile playing on my lips.

With a loud yawn, I untangle myself from him and head towards the bathroom. The lights flick on and I rub my eyes as they adjust. Fucking hell. I've looked better. Eyes bloodshot with dark circles yet to fade underneath, hair disheveled. I turn on the cold water and splash my face before turning it hot to brush my teeth and wash my face. Satisfied enough with my appearance and doing one quick scan through my phone notifications, I head out to see if Dean is awake.

Creeping back inside I see him sitting on the side of the bed rubbing his shoulder. Seeing him sitting there. Shirtless with light from the window sending beams across his strong chest thick stomach. A light dusting of hair across his chest. Powerful legs hanging over the side of the bed, with my boxer briefs clad to his skin. He was so sexy and I could feel my heart racing.

"You like the view?

Snapping from my haze, I chuckle and walk towards him. He reaches for the bag holding all of his worldly possessions he pulls out his cell phone charger and plugs up his phone. I ruffle his hair before sitting down next to him, pressing my thigh into his. He chuckles and returns the pressure.

"No messages or calls from my mom. I don't know if I'm upset or relieved."

Placing my hand on his thigh. "Both. Parents are more than a little complicated, but thankfully my dads' flight landed and he won't be back until my football game next on Friday since this is an off week."

"Let's turn our ringers on just in case, but I wouldn't mind spending the day here relaxing. Especially since I don't know where I'm gonna go now. I still can't believe I left. Every little thing I own stuffed inside one duffel bag."

I could feel his mood start to turn, could see it as he squeezed his eyes closed and leaned forward placing his elbows on his knees and resting his chin in his hands. No. I wasn't gonna let him get sad and I wasn't gonna let him go either. This idea was crazy... the thoughts swirled through my head at an earth-shattering pace and I found myself trapped between fear and exhilaration. Standing up I grab his bag and head towards my dresser. Opening the bottom drawer I start to unpack the few contents.

"He wait, what are you doing?"

"You're not leaving ok. I... I don't know if this is gonna work and it could go horribly wrong but we have to try."

"What in the hell are you talking about? There is no way your dad's gonna let me stay here!"

-Whispers- "He doesn't have to know."

"What" I could hear the confusion in his voice and if I didn't say my plan now I was going to chicken out.

"Look. My dad sleeps here 3 times a week during football season. He comes in my room on Sunday to inspect my room for cleanliness, but doesn't actually take stock into what I have in here. If we are careful you could stay here... at least until we figure out a better idea."

DEAN

Did he just say what I think he said. He'd risk everything to let me stay here with him? He'd risk the violence and self loathing his father inflicts on him? He'd risk his safety and security? I close the gap between us and pull him to his feet. I place my right hand on the side of his face and lean in, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. The kiss is soft and gentle as  my body trembles. He leans harder against me and takes my lips as his. From gentle to passion, his strength in this moment makes me weak in the knees.

Breaking the kiss, both of us panting. "Can we really do this? I won't hate you if you back out now."

"I'm terrified. I'd be kidding myself if I said I wasn't. But now that I have you, I can't let you go without a fight."

Pulling back from him. "Ok but we gotta plan this shit out, cause your Dad's no fool. One mistake and we're fucked."

Nodding he heads to his bed and gets a sketch book out. Turning to a blank page he starts to list out his Dad's schedule, times that he's home, times he's in the area, times he's traveling. His dad lives and breathes by his calendar and that is our saving grace. He pulled out an old phone of his that had access to the calendar and gave it to me. It was hooked up to his Dad's companies account so he wouldn't even notice that it was being used.

We spent 5 hours working through the schedule of leaving for school all the way through when we go to sleep. The stress of coming up with this plan made us both knotted and sick to our stomachs, but we had to keep going. We raised the bed so I could easily roll out of bed and under it if his dad came inside his room. Nick was crazy smart, he placed a doggy door sensor on his door so that when it opened it would make an alarm sound on his phone. I didn't even know that was possible.

Collapsing on the bed we just start to laugh only interrupted by the grumbling of our stomachs. "OK lets eat."

NICK

This was gonna work, this was gonna work, this was gonna WORK! I think it over and over again as I place the order for Vietnamese food from Door Dash. I look back and I see him looking over the list, I think he was using studying muscles that have been dormant for a very long time.

The rest of weekend passes by uneventfully. We practice leaving and coming to the house through the back and side entrances. I show him how to avoid being seen by the neighbors and oddly, he shows me a few tricks he has for avoiding being seen. We go out shopping for him some new cloths, cheap so no one notices the difference, and I finish my homework which I make him at least start. We fell into this odd rythem that felt abnormal and yet fit just right.  

Sunday afternoon rolled around and Wayne calls Dean needing to see him. After some protesting Dean relents and we head out to meet Wayne at the Angry Bull.

What would happen next...