Cocklust

When I went home that weekend, I felt like my world had turned upside down.  I tried to put a good face on things, so I didn’t say a word to my parents, or to anyone else for that matter.  But the truth was that Chad had totally thrown me for a loop.  I’d never felt so strongly about anyone— much less a dude— and I didn’t know what to make of it.

I tried texting Chad, and I messaged him on Facebook, but he never responded. I tried calling him too, but he never picked up, and he never called me back. I ended up having to keep all my thoughts to myself.

The most awkward part was that all my friends and family wanted to know how I’d been. It was my first time back from college, so everybody wanted to see me, and of course they all had a million questions. I didn’t want to deal with that right then, but there was no way around it. I didn’t want them to think I didn’t have my shit together, and I definitely didn’t want to tell them I was gay or bi or whatever I was. So I just went through the motions: I smiled and nodded and acted like everything was fine.

I did my best to distract myself with work. I had an internship with my dad’s firm, so I basically spent my days answering phones, scheduling meetings, and all the other crap you do in an office. But it was a nine-to-five job, so I still had evenings and weekends to myself. No matter what I did, my urges wouldn’t go away; I kept having more and more sex dreams, night after night.

Eventually I broke down and downloaded Grindr. I didn’t actually hook up with anyone, because I still wanted to meet up with Chad. But I did spend a lot of time checking out my neighborhood’s man meat. I was amazed at how many gay guys there were. I definitely hadn’t known about them in high school, yet here they were, one profile after another.

My own profile was as anonymous as I could make it. I called myself RJ630, which was the vaguest name I could think of, and I used a picture that only showed my chest. I never posted anything that could be traced back to me. I did get responses, and I chatted with a few dudes here and there, but I never had the balls to meet up.

At the same time, I watched an awful lot of YouTube. I found a bunch of guys who’d been vlogging about their experiences— some more anonymous than others— and the more I got to know them, the more interesting they got to be.

One guy named Ayden chronicled the ups and downs of his life, including the dates, fantasy crushes, and full-on boyfriends he’d gone through. Another guy, who called himself the Hillbilly Homo, talked about growing up gay in the South. Then there was a couple named Nick and Jay, who kept traveling the world; their channel was full of fancy landmarks and exotic locales, with a bunch of shirtless clips thrown in for good measure.

I also started following gay celebrities online. I’d heard of a few of these guys in the news, but this was the first time I’d really checked them out. I’d never realized how hot Ricky Martin was, or Matt Bomer for that matter— or Lance Bass, Dustin Lance Black, or Jonathan Groff, just to name a few. I found myself starting to fantasize about them: I imagined them with their men, and how they probably had sex. I also started following some not-so-gay guys, like Zac Efron and Channing Tatum, for the sake of the eye candy.

All that stuff fed my jerk-off habits. I had my bedroom to myself, which was way more comfortable than my old dorm room. But it was also less private: I did have a lock on my door, but my mom didn’t like me using it, and I didn’t want anyone hearing me anyway. So I always made sure to listen for footsteps, and I was always prepared in case someone surprised me.

My sister was the main person I was worried about. Her room was right to mine, and she was a night owl just like me. She was the nosiest person I’d ever met, and worse yet, she was a blabbermouth. I knew I could never give her the slightest inkling of what was going on. If Amy figured me out, then the whole world would know, starting with my parents. I couldn’t imagine them all knowing I‘d taken a liking to dick.

After three weeks of that shit, I knew I had to get out of there, at least for a while. As soon as I got off work that Friday, I hopped on a train and went all the way to Boystown.

I’d always thought of that place being weird, probably because of how my friends made it sound. But when I got there that day, I felt like I was seeing it through totally new eyes. I didn’t know my way around, and I definitely didn’t know what I was doing. But it seemed like a place where I could hang out and be myself— or at least so I hoped.

There were more gay bars there than I knew what to do with. They all had rainbow flags and shit in the windows, but I could only imagine what was inside.

I walked up and down the street, trying to gather up my nerve. I was afraid of getting carded, since I was still underage, and I couldn’t afford a fake ID. Most of all, I dreaded the thought of running into someone I knew. I tried to tell myself everything was cool, but I was still on pins and needles.

I eventually went to a place called the Meatpacking Plant, where they let me in without batting an eye. It took me a second to get my bearings: the space was a lot bigger than it looked from outside, and a lot of it was dark. The dudes inside were in all shapes and sizes. The bartenders were all shirtless, and they were damned good looking. A half-dozen go-go boys were dancing on the stage.

I didn’t know what to do next, so I just sat at the bar. The menu was basically shit: the food was just snack stuff, and the drinks were mostly cheap beer and cocktails. Not that I could afford much anyway, and from what I could tell, no one came there for the food or drink to begin with.

“What’s good here?” I asked to the guy sitting next to me. But he didn’t answer. He was playing with his phone, swiping through profile pictures. He looked up at me, swiped left, and looked away.

What the hell? I thought to myself. I wasn’t sure if that was how it was there, or if that guy was just an asshole.

The bartender walked up to me. “What’ll it be?” he asked.

“Uh,” I said, “I guess a Sex on the Beach?”

“You got it,” the bartender said, and he started making my drink.

I turned around and watched the go-go boys onstage. I was so used to checking out men in secret that I felt weird doing it in plain view. I kept having to tell myself that in a place like this, it was fine.

The dancers were gyrating all over the stage, dressed in nothing but g-strings. They waved their bulges and asses at the crowd, while the people in the front rows stuffed money in their thongs.

I had to wonder if these guys were all gay, because a lot of them didn’t look it. I wondered if at least a few might be doing it for the money, like those gay-for-pay people. One way or another, they were putting on a good show: they were basically strippers, and they seemed totally into it. I couldn’t take my eyes off them.

The bartender slid me my drink, and I turned to pick it up. As I did, I noticed a dude near the end of the bar. He looked like a total manly man, with a tank top that said in big letters “Sorry girls, I’m gay.” I suddenly realized he was checking me out.

I wasn’t sure what to do next. I sipped my drink and looked in the other direction. The guy on his phone had finished swiping; I had to wonder if he’d found the hookup he’d been looking for. A few feet away, two guys were busy flirting, and they looked like they were about to make out. Another man was just nursing his drink and staring at the stage, as if he was transfixed by the dancers. A bunch of others were just wandering around.

Finally the dude in the tank top walked over. “So,” he said, “what’s a cute thing like you doing here by yourself?”

I didn’t know how to answer. I was tempted to say I’d just gotten out of a relationship, but I wasn’t sure where Chad and I really stood, and I didn’t know if we’d had a relationship to begin with. “W-well,” I said, “I guess I’m here for the same reason you are.”

“Atta boy,” he said. He waved to the bartender. “Hey Fitz, put his drink on my tab.”

“You don’t have to do that,” I said.

“I know,” he said as he sat down beside me. “I’m Gabe by the way.”

I almost gave my real name, but I went with my online alias instead. “R.J.,” I said, and I shook his hand.

“Cool,” he said. “So what does R.J. stand for?”

I felt a pang of fear. Those initials were totally random, so they didn’t stand for anything. I blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “Rick James,” I said.

“Rick James? No shit!”

I suddenly felt like an idiot, but I tried to play it off as best I could. “You see why they call me R.J.,” I said.

“Yeah, I guess,” he said. “But you gotta admit, it’s kind of badass. You could totally say ‘I’m Rick James, bitch!’”

I didn’t want to embarrass myself any more than I already had. I just shrugged and sipped my drink.

“So R.J.,” he said, “what do you like to do with a guy?”

I was caught off guard by that. I wasn’t used to being open about sex, at least not like that. I was used to girls wanting to beat around the bush. “O-oh I dunno,” I finally said.

“I’m a bottom myself.”

I nodded. “That’s cool.”

“Are you a newbie?” he asked.

I didn’t know what to say to that. “What do you think is a newbie?”

“I dunno. Maybe ten guys or less?”

“Shit,” I said, “then yeah, I guess I’m a newbie.”

“With a body like that?” he asked. “Well then, what’s your type?”

“My type?”

“What kinds of guys do you like?”

“I mean,” I said, “well, you’re not bad looking—”

“I wasn’t fishing for compliments. I really want to know.”

I fiddled with the coaster in front of me. “Well... I-I mean I like muscles I guess....”

“It sounds to me like you need a good teacher.”

“You mean like you?”

“I guess you could say that,” he said with a grin. Then he pointed to the stage. “Which of those guys do you think is the hottest?”

I turned around and tried to figure out what to say. All the guys on stage were about the same type. They were all in their twenties, and their bodies were oiled and ripped. “I mean, they’re all hot,” I said, “but I guess the one on the right is the hottest.”

“That’s cool,” Gabe said. “Me, I like that guy in the middle. The one with the arm tattoo. I could totally hit that.”

I sipped my drink. “Yeah, me too,” I said. I still felt a little out of my depth, because I’d never talked that way about guys. But the more Gabe and I talked, the more comfortable I got; and of course the drinking helped too.

“Do you live around here?” Gabe eventually asked.

“Oh no,” I said. “I-I mean, I’m just visiting.”

“That’s cool,” he said. “Me, I live right around the corner. It’s so nice being able to walk here—”

“So you come here a lot?”

“I try to,” he said. “But some nights here are more fun than others.” He leaned in toward me, and the next thing I knew, we were kissing.

I suddenly felt self-conscious again. There were dozens of people around us, yet here we were, locking lips in front of all of them. I was so used to being secretive with Chad, that I almost thought it was scandalous to do this in the open. But as far as I could tell, nobody here gave a shit.

Gabe finally broke the kiss and whispered in my ear. “Do you want to get out of here?”

I couldn’t say yes fast enough. I finished my drink, and he closed out our tab. Then I followed him home, and less than five minutes later, we stumbled into his apartment. We plopped down on his couch, ran our hands across each other, and made out some more.

“Your back is so tense,” he said between kisses.

“I know,” I said. “It’s been a long week.”

“Then let me take care of it,” he said.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Trust me,” he said. He pulled my shirt off and threw it aside. Then he reached for a cabinet and grabbed a jar of massage oil. “Here, lie down.”

I did as I was told. The couch was surprisingly comfortable. This wasn’t cheap student furniture like what I was used to; it was a fancy leather sectional with a very nice throw. Gabe didn’t seem much older than me, but he obviously had money, not to mention taste.

Gabe climbed on top of me, rubbed the oil on my back, and started kneading me. He started between my shoulder blades, then made his way toward my arms.

I was surprised by how good it felt. The oil smelled really nice, and it made my whole back feel warm. Gabe zeroed right in on the knots in my muscles, and he started working them out. It hurt for a second, but the more he worked out the tension, the more pleasurable it got.

We both still had our pants on, but I could totally feel Gabe’s hardon grind against my ass. It was such a fucking turn-on, and it made my own dick press harder against the couch.

Gabe reached underneath me, undid my fly, and pulled off my pants. Then he kneeled next to the couch and started massaging my legs.

“Oh shit,” I said, “I fucking needed this....”

“I could tell,” he said as he ran his hands up my thigh. “I need it too.” He pulled off my underwear and kneaded my ass. He squeezed each cheek, one after the other, then ran his hand down my crack. I kept waiting for him to play with my hole, but he didn’t.

“You fucking tease,” I said.

“That’s the idea,” he said. “Now roll over.”

I complied, and my dick flopped into the open. By now I was hard as a rock.

“Nice,” Gabe said.

I was itching to see Gabe in his full glory, but he was in no rush. He leaned down and started sucking my nipples. He rubbed himself as he did it, but he wouldn’t let me touch him. Finally he kissed me and stood up. At long last, he pulled down his pants, and I saw he wasn’t wearing underwear.

His cock looked totally different from Chad’s. Gabe had shaved his pubes and his chest hair, so he looked even more naked than what I was used to. He was also uncut, though he was so hard that it was almost impossible to tell. I also noticed how his dick curved a little, unlike Chad’s which was straight as an arrow.

“So,” he said, “do you like what you see?”

“Fuck yeah,” I said.

Gabe smiled, and without another word, he started sucking my cock. He obviously knew what he was doing: he was totally deliberate with his lips and his tongue, and it drove me fucking wild. Every time I moved or let out a breath, he knew exactly what it meant, and he responded accordingly.

Eventually he let my dick pop out of his mouth. “How does that feel?” he asked.

“Fucking incredible,” I said.

Gabe reached back for his cabinet, and as he opened it, I saw he had a whole set of sex supplies ready to go. He pulled out a bottle of lube and set it on the table. Then he pointed to a half-dozen boxes of condoms. “What size are you?” he asked.

“Size?” I tripped over my words at first. “Uh, I dunno, I mean I guess whatever... don’t you just have condoms in your own size?”

“Oh no,” he said. “I never do the fucking. I just want to get fucked.”

“Say what?”

“I told you I was a bottom. Actually, power bottom is more like it.”

“Woah,” I said. I didn’t want to tell him that I’d only been with Chad. I’d definitely gotten to like bottoming, but I couldn’t imagine doing just that.

“Are you saying you don’t want to fuck me?” he asked.

“I didn’t say that.” I pointed to the condoms. “Let me see those.” As I did, I felt an awkward blast from the past. I’d used the same brands about a year before, when I’d been fucking my ex-girlfriend.

“What’s wrong?” Gabe asked.

“Nothing,” I said. I picked out a condom that I knew would fit, pulled it out of its wrapper, and rolled it onto my cock.

Gabe lubed up his ass, then he offered me the bottle. His lube was totally different from what I was used to; it seemed a lot more watery at first, but it was also a lot more slippery, and it seemed weirdly oily. “Now lie back down,” he said.

I did as I was told. The blanket was surprisingly soft. Gabe climbed on top of me, then lowered himself onto my cock. I felt myself slide right into his chute; he seemed to fit me like a glove. The next thing I knew, his ass was resting on my pubes.

The way the couch was positioned, I could barely move, so Gabe was in control. He clamped his ass down on my dick and started rocking back and forth. He didn’t bother talking dirty, but I could tell how much he was loving it. He closed his eyes and curled his mouth into a smile. He kept grunting and moaning as my dick pumped deeper and deeper inside him.

We started out kind of slow, but then Gabe picked up the pace. There was nothing delicate about sex with this guy: he obviously wanted to get pounded, and he kept thrusting faster and faster. Before I knew it, we were fucking as fast as we could.

I almost ran out of breath, but then Gabe started slowing down, and we went back to more of a steady speed. Gabe ran his ass in kind of a circular motion, and I felt my dick exploring his insides.

I looked into his eyes, and he looked right back at me. Both of us were obviously savoring the sensation. Then, a few seconds later, he started speeding up again.

Gabe’s dick was tantalizingly close to my face, and I wanted to suck it, but it stayed just of reach— at least for my mouth. So I did the next-best thing and ran my hands across his shaft. It took my hands a second to match up with his rhythm, but once they did, I started beating him off like nobody’s business.

Gabe leaned down and kissed me. “I want you to take me from behind,” he said.

We both stopped fucking for a second, then changed positions. Gabe got down on all fours and stuck his ass out at me.

His half-fucked hole looked delicious, and I couldn’t wait to dive back in. I got on my knees behind him, ran my cock up and down his crack, and finally pushed my way inside.

Gabe’s ass went back to slamming against my pubes. I felt like I was losing my virginity all over again. Gabe wasn’t just an inexperienced college kid getting off. He was a fucking expert at this. I loved how unapologetic he was: Gabe wanted my dick, and I wanted his ass, and his mission was to give both of us what we wanted.

Even in this position, Gabe was the one in charge. He kept thrusting his body against me, while he guided me with his left hand and jerked himself off with his right. He was working so hard that he was getting more exercise than I was.

Gabe’s body started tensing up, and I felt his sphincter clamp down on my cock. His groans went up in pitch, then finally reached a crescendo, just as his jizz splattered onto his blanket. His body was spasming so much that I could totally feel his orgasm inside him.

I knew how much cum I had pent up myself. I knew I couldn’t hold out much longer, and I didn’t even try. I gave him a couple more thrusts, but I could already feel my load moving up my pole. Then I yelped and blew my load inside him.

I could barely control myself. My nerves were so active, I could feel my juices pouring out of me. Gabe kept working my cock the whole time, which felt so fucking good.

Finally I finished pumping, and I tried to catch my breath. Gabe pulled forward, and my dick popped out of his ass. My condom was so full that it barely stayed on.

“Now that’s what I’m talking about,” Gabe said. He stood up and gave me a kiss.

I plopped back against the end of the couch. As I did, Gabe pulled up the cummy blanket. He tossed the blanket into his bedroom, where a laundry hamper was waiting.

“You can throw your condom over there,” he said, and he pointed over at a trash can.

“Wow,” I said. “You’ve got this down to a science, don’t you?” I opened the trash can, and as I did, I saw a bunch of other condoms lying inside.

“What can I say?” Gabe said. “I like sex.”

Part of me thought that was weird, but another part thought it was hot. I wondered how many other guys had paraded through that apartment.

“You want a drink?” Gabe asked. “You didn’t seem to like that shit at the bar.”

“Uh... sure, I guess.”

“Are you a wine guy?” he asked as he stepped into his kitchen. “I’ve got a merlot, a cab, and a pinot grigio. Or if you’re more into beers, I’ve got a hef, an IPA, and a stout. Plus I’ve got some stuff for mixed drinks too. Take your pick.”

I didn’t really know how to answer. I’d expected him to pull a slam-bam-thank-you-man. Yet here he was, treating me like a hot date. “Well,” I said, “surprise me.”

“Make yourself comfortable,” he said.

I sat back on the couch, still butt naked, and I waited till Gabe came back with our drinks. He handed me a beer, and I took a sip. “Wow,” I said, “this is good.”

Gabe snuggled up to me. “Well you know,” he said, “there’s more where all of this came from.”

I’d planned to go home that night, but at that point I didn’t want to leave. Gabe wasn’t exactly shooing me away; he kept laying on the charm, and he flat-out offered to have me spend the night. I played coy at first, but I’d secretly been thinking the same thing. Eventually I figured what the hell, and I agreed to stay over.

Gabe’s bed was downright luxurious, one of those pillow-top mattresses with feather pillows and comforters. When he and I laid down, I felt like we were sinking into the fabric. Gabe put his arm around me and started spooning with me, with his chest to my back. I felt Gabe’s breath against my neck, and I savored the warmth of his body against mine.

I was still kind of surprised this was real, but I wasn’t about to complain. I’d never met a gay guy so secure in his sexuality. It was actually pretty refreshing. Part of me wanted to be like that myself, although the other part wasn’t sure I could ever pull it off.

I took Gabe’s hand, which was right next to mine, and I held it against my chest. I was so comfortable that my worries seemed to melt away. I closed my eyes, and I pressed my body against Gabe’s. Then, slowly but surely, the two of us drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, at first I didn’t know where I was. It took me a second before I recognized the ceiling above me. Gabe wasn’t lying beside me, but all of his sheets were twisted around my body.

I almost didn’t want to get up, but I knew I’d eventually have to. I threw the sheets aside, and I went to see what Gabe was doing.

It turned out he was making breakfast. He’d thrown on a bathrobe, but he hadn’t cinched it up in the front, so his cock and balls were still out in the open. “Morning stud,” he said.

I was a little self-conscious, because I wasn’t wearing anything either. “Morning.”

“Here, have a seat,” he said. “You want some coffee? I already made a pot of regular, but if you want a cappuccino or something, I can make you that too—”

“Regular coffee is cool,” I said.

“Coming right up,” he said. “Cream and sugar?”

“Cream,” I said. My coffee was the one part of my routine that never changed. I wasn’t a morning person, so I could barely face the day without it.

“Coming right up,” he said. “I was just making fruit salad, but I can make you whatever you want: omelettes, French toast, oatmeal, you name it.”

“Whatever’s easiest,” I said. I’d stopped eating breakfast my first semester in college. I didn’t like to cook, so I’d basically been living off ramen noodles and whatever else was easy and cheap. “So,” I said, “what’s it like living here anyway?”

He handed me a coffee. “You mean Boystown?” he asked.

“Well yeah—”

“There’s lots of dick around here,” he said, “so for a guy like me, it’s perfect.”

I sipped my coffee. “Does it ever get to be, I dunno, a little much?”

Gabe shrugged. “Well, not all dick is good dick,” he said. “So yeah: sometimes you get hit on by guys you don’t like. But all you’ve got to do is say no. Here, nobody cares what you’re into, so you can pretty much do whatever you want— or who you want, for that matter. It’s not like Shitbake, Oklahoma, where everybody’s up in your business.”

“Is that where you’re from?”

“Oklahoma? Yeah. I got out of there as fast as I could.” He set a plate in front of me, then carefully laid out the silverware beside it. “The only thing good about it are the strapping boys. And even then, they might as well have been forbidden fruit.”

“That sucks,” was the only thing I could say.

“So what about you?” he asked.

“M-me?”

“Well yeah. You said you were just visiting. Where from?”

I suddenly got nervous again. After all, I hadn’t even told him my real name, so I was afraid of getting caught in a lie. “Medford, Oregon,” I finally blurted out.

“That’s cool,” he said. “How far is that from Northern California— is it close to San Francisco?”

I actually wasn’t sure. I’d never been anywhere near San Francisco, but I didn’t want to admit it. “Well,” I said, “to San Francisco, you basically have to fly.”

“No shit?” he said. “I love it there. That city is awesome.” He set his salad bowl on the table. “Bon appetit.”

“Thank you,” I said, and I gave him a kiss. I meant for it to be a quick peck, but then I tasted his tongue, and I couldn’t bring myself to stop. His lips were soft and luscious, and I couldn’t get enough of them. Then I felt his breath against mine, which turned me on even more.

“Mm,” he said after a minute. “Looks like someone’s got a case of morning wood.”

“Is that a problem?” I asked.

“I didn’t say that,” he said. Then he grinned and stepped back, and I saw he was half-hard himself. “You want to have some fun with this?”

I didn’t really know what he meant, but at that point, I didn’t care.

“Here, lie down,” he said, and he pointed to the floor.

I followed his instructions and laid flat against the ground. The tile was cool at first, but it warmed up fast against my skin.

Gabe took off his bathrobe and tossed it aside. “Now don’t move,” he said as he dipped a spoon into his bowl. He brought out a helping of strawberries, banana slices, and pieces of melon. Then he sprinkled them over my body.

I was afraid of making a mess, so I stayed as still as a statue. The only exception was my dick, which was still getting harder.

Gabe kept playing with my body till I had food on my chest, my arms, and my legs. Then he kneeled down and started licking it off me. He made a show of it too: he rolled a strawberry around his mouth and let the juices flow all over his lips. Then he flicked his tongue and swallowed. “What do you think of that?” he asked.

I grinned but didn’t say anything. I was surprised at how turned on I was, but I was still afraid to move. I figured all the answers he needed were right between my legs.

Gabe ran his mouth along my arms— first my right, then my left— and he gobbled up the food along the way. Then he started on my chest, and he made sure to run his tongue across my nipples. I was dying for him to touch my cock, but he didn’t. He just got as far as my bellybutton, then moved down to my feet.

“Oh shit,” I said as he rubbed my left foot. I’d never had a proper foot massage before, so I’d never realized how good it could feel. I had to resist the urge to squirm.

Gabe went back to eating the food off my body, starting with my left ankle, then heading up my leg. Again, he stopped when he was a few inches from my package. Then he went down to my right foot too; he massaged it for a minute, then repeated the process on my leg.

By now, the food on my body was gone, and I couldn’t resist the urge to touch myself. “That’s so fucking hot,” I said.

“I figured you might like that,” he said. “You want to try it on me?”

I jumped at the offer, and he and I switched places. I wasn’t nearly as self-assured as he was: I dropped a whole spoonful of food on his chest. I played it off like it was no big deal, and I ate it right off him.

I loved the taste of his skin mixed in with those juices. I dribbled more food all over his body, then basically sucked it all up.

Along the way, I bumped a blueberry, and it went rolling across the floor. But at that point, I didn’t care. All I cared about was the beautiful naked man before me. I lapped up a piece of melon from his crotch, then put my hand on his cock and guided it into my mouth.

“Oh yeah,” he gasped.

I sucked his cock like I was fucking possessed. I bobbed my head up and down so fast I got dizzy. His dick went so far back that I almost gagged, but I managed not to.

I wanted him up my ass, so I took my mouth off him, and I climbed on top of his body. I positioned my boyhole right over his cock, then reached back and pulled him toward me.

“Hey,” he said, “I don’t top, remember?”

I felt like I was about to burst. His shaft felt right at home underneath me, and I could only imagine how good it would feel on the inside. “I fucking want you,” I said.

“I want you too,” he said, “but we don’t have supplies in here anyway.”

“Fuck....”

Gabe leaned up and kissed me. “Although you know,” he said, “we can always do something else.”

I didn’t know what he had in mind, but before I could ask, he started jerking me off. I hadn’t expected that, and my dick was already tingling, so I kind of flinched with surprise. But I didn’t want him to stop.

Gabe reached down with his free hand, and he played with my balls. Then, after a minute, he made his way further back. I felt his fingers exploring my crack. Suddenly he pulled away, and I was about to reprimand him, but then he spit on his fingers. Finally he reached back for my ass, and the next thing I knew, his fingers were inside me.

“Oh shit,” I said. As much as I wanted his dick, I loved the feeling of him playing with my ass. I could feel his fingers exploring my insides, which made my fuckring tighten up. He kept going, but I knew I couldn’t last much longer. “I’m gonna cum,” I said between gasps.

“Go for it,” he said, and he closed his eyes.

My balls started to twitch, and then my dick started spasming. “Oh yeah!” I yelled as a rope of cum hit Gabe on the check. Then another rope hit him on the forehead, followed by one across his nose, one by his eyes, and one on his neck.

Gabe took his hand off my dick and started jerking himself off. It only took a few seconds before he shot his own wad. I felt a few squirts hit my hole, but most of his juices splashed between my legs. By the time he stopped pumping, his abs were basically covered.

“Wow,” was all I could say.

Gabe wiped off his face with his hands, then lapped up the cum around his mouth. “What’d you think of that?” he asked.

“That was fucking amazing,” I said.

“I told you,” he said.

Both of us got up, and Gabe grabbed a kitchen towel from nearby. He wiped the rest of the cum from his body, grabbed the stray blueberry, and cleaned up the floor. He threw the berry in the trash, then headed for his room and threw his towel in the laundry.

“Take your time with breakfast,” he said. “Whenever you’re ready, I put out fresh towels and a toothbrush. Feel free to use whatever other bathroom stuff you need.”

“Wow,” I said, “thank you.” I felt so good that I just wanted to relax. I was looking forward to the shower, but at that moment all I wanted to do was sit down.

I nursed my coffee for a while, and I looked out the window. Gabe’s place was up on the fourth floor, so it looked down on the streets. I wondered if his neighbors could see me, or if they could’ve seen what we just did. But all the buildings around us seemed quiet.

“Say,” I said, “have you ever thought about putting on a show?”

“What, you mean like exhibitionist shit?” he asked as he sat down next to me. “No, that’s not really my thing. No offense to people who are into it.”

“Have you known people who were?”

“Oh yeah,” he said. “I know guys who totally get off on that shit. So they’ll hook up in public, or show off online, or whatever. Sometimes I’ll watch them on Chaturbate, but that’s as far as I go.”

I nodded. I wasn’t sure if I’d be into that or not. I felt like I was just starting to get to know my gay side; there was a helluva lot that I just didn’t know.

When I finally headed for the shower, I found the stuff Gabe had laid out for me. Once again, he was totally on top of things. The toothbrush was still in the original packaging, and the towels all matched perfectly.

Gabe’s shower was super nice. It was one of those big stall showers with clear glass doors, and the inside was made of polished stone. One wall was lined with bottles: he must’ve had at least a dozen shampoos and body washes in there.

I stepped in the shower and turned on the water. It came out nice and hot, and steam came wafting over me. I could practically feel my pores open up. I leaned my head back and let the water pour over my skin.

I picked up a bottle and poured some body wash on my hand. I worked it into a lather, then started scrubbing my body.

I had just soaped up my crotch and my ass when I realized Gabe was watching me. I could barely see him through the fogged-up glass, but I could see enough to know he was playing with himself.

“That’s hot,” he said.

“Do you want to join me?” I asked.

“I don’t mind if I do,” he said as he opened the shower door and stepped inside.

We put our arms around each other, and we started making out. I could feel my dick getting hard again. Even though I’d just gotten off, I still wanted more. I pressed Gabe against the wall, and I reached to turn off the water.

“No,” he said, “keep it running. It’s hotter that way.”

I pulled my hand away from the faucet, and we went back to sucking face. Our cocks jousted as we rubbed our bodies together. I was right under the jet, so I could feel the water washing the suds away. Gabe’s hair was saturated by then, and his skin was glistening under the light.

“Hang on,” he said as he stepped outside the shower. He reached under his sink, where he apparently had another stash of supplies. I caught a glimpse of a plastic bulb, along with some toys. He handed me a rubber— the same kind we’d used the night before— and I put it on as fast as I could. Then he lubed up his ass.

“Are you sure that won’t wash away?” I asked.

“It’s silicone lube,” he said. “It’ll stand up to anything.” He put the lube bottle back in its place, then got back in the shower. He turned his ass to me and braced his arms against the wall.

I’d never fucked standing up, but it came pretty naturally. I just guided my dick inside him and started pounding away.

Gabe’s body shuddered with every thrust, but he took it like a pro. He was still as tight as he’d been the night before. My fuck muscle felt so good inside him, and I think the feeling was mutual.

I kept slapping his patty for a minute or two, and then we switched positions. Gabe sat on a stone ledge, wrapped his legs around me, and pulled me toward him. He looked so fucking gorgeous with his hole staring at me and his cock totally hard.

I slid my dick back into his ass, and I started jerking him off. Gabe closed his eyes and opened his mouth. He was obviously enjoying the ride, but he still managed to set the rhythm in the way he slammed back into me. His legs kept flying up and down as I kept reaming his ass.

It took us a while to get off, but it was worth it. I could feel my muscles flexing, and slowly but surely, I approached the point of no return. Gabe went first; he let out a scream, and his seed shot up from his cock.

Suddenly I felt the condom rip, and my dick suddenly felt even better than before. I was tempted to blast right inside him, but I forced himself to pull out, and I yanked off the rubber. Then I pounded my pud, brought myself to orgasm, and busted.

“Aw fuck yeah,” I gasped. The pleasure was more intense than I’d expected. It rippled through my body, to the point that I had to hold the wall for support. Finally I stepped back.

“Mm,” he said as he got down off the ledge. “Did you like that?”

“Fucking A,” I said.

Gabe chuckled and kissed me. “Good,” he said, “now let’s get you cleaned off.”

It was a little crowded with both of us in the shower, but I didn’t care, and I didn’t think he did either. I threw away the torn condom, and I rinsed myself off. Then I helped Gabe soap up his body. I paid special attention to his crotch and his butt— after what we’d just done, I figured they needed extra care— and then I stepped back. Gabe stepped under the jet for a minute, and all the suds drained away.

I didn’t want to leave, but I knew I pretty much had to. I didn’t have a change of clothes, not to mention that I didn’t want to overstay my welcome. I took my time getting dressed, but eventually I knew it was time.

“You know, this was fun,” Gabe said. “The next time you’re around, let me know. You can always find me on Grindr.”

“Of course,” I said, and I gave him one last kiss. Then I headed for the stairwell and started my walk of shame back home.

On my way back to the train station, I kept eyeing the buildings around me. They didn’t seem nearly as alien anymore. On the contrary, they seemed awfully inviting, if not downright tempting. I knew I’d barely scratched the surface of what Boystown had to offer, and I couldn’t wait to do more exploring.

I paused outside of a sex shop, and I tried to imagine what might be inside. The windows showed a few ads with scantily-clad boys, but that was all I could see. Everything else was hidden behind black curtains.

I thought back to Gabe’s sex supplies, especially the toys we’d never gotten around to using. I wanted so badly to check out this store, but I knew I couldn’t, at least not at that moment. It wouldn’t open for hours, and besides, I couldn’t have brought that stuff back to my parents’ house.

As it was, I wasn’t sure how to explain where I’d been. The ride home took over an hour, and I used that whole time to decide how to spin it. I just knew I couldn’t let them know the truth.

By that point, I’d basically concluded I was full-on gay. I knew I’d awakened powerful urges inside me, and I loved sex with men so much that I couldn’t imagine going back to women. I was starting to realize that the stuff I’d done with Chad was just the tip of the iceberg. There were so many other gay guys out there, and so many things I wanted to do with them, that I could only imagine the possibilities— which made it that much harder to keep it under wraps. But I knew I’d have to find a way.



To be continued....