The People in Rossford
“What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?”
“Agreed to sleep with you.”
In the bed Todd turned on his side. “I’m being serious.”
“And how do you know I’m not? And whatever happened to mystery?”
Todd lay on his back and said, “There should be no mysteries between lovers.”
“That’s what you say. Because you’re twenty-two.”
“Twenty-three.”
“It’s the same.”
“Have you ever been in a threesome?”
“Do we have to play this game?”
“Yes.”
“Well, then no,” Fenn sat up. “I’ve never been in a threesome. Or a foursome or a fivesome. Has no appeal.”
“Do you want to know if I have?”
“No.”
Todd opened his mouth, seemed to be considering something, and then said, “All right.
“Have you ever had sex with a married man?”
“Yes,” said Fenn.
Todd looked astounded.
“Don’t be,” said Fenn. “During the time between Tom and you, and before Tom for that matter, I did a lot of things. At first I thought I’d never be with a man five years younger than me. I’d never do this, never do that. Then I realized I was limiting myself and eventually I decided that whoever approached me, whatever baggage he had was his baggage, not mine. Life got a lot easier when I didn’t care so much about someone else’s shit.”
“That is such a shock.”
“Is it?”
“With Tom and everything.”
“If Tom and everything had happened outside of our home, I wouldn’t have known. If it had happened with someone I didn’t know, who didn’t know me, it wouldn’t have been the same. If Tom had been straight, and I’d been his wife, and he was blowing another man, that would have pointed to a problem with us.”
“I have been a three way,” Todd volunteered. “A few times.”
“How many?”
“Three. Once after college. Once in college. Once in high school. Have you… ever had sex in a church?”
“No. I can’t imagine where in a church I would want to. Though Tom did try to convince me to fuck him on the organ at Saint Barbara’s.”
“Get out.”
“He has a wild side. Or, at least, he had one. I was very shocked. As you can imagine. I think I would have said yes, but it’s in the choir loft and it just seems so big and open like you can’t tell if anyone’s there or not. And then someone could have walked up from below and seen it. No, I had to pass. Have you ever watched other people having sex?”
“You mean walked in on, or watched on purpose and stayed?”
“The latter, of course.”
“Once.”
Fenn perked up with interest. “Who?”
“I’ll never tell.”
“It wasn’t me was it?”
“No. That much I can tell you. Have you ever had sex with someone else watching?”
“You mean a third person?”
“Yeah.”
“No. That freaks me out.”
“All the sex you have isn’t personal, though.”
“All sex is personal.”
“Well, I guess, but with you it’s different. Like, I can’t imagine us having a three way, or letting someone else watch. I can’t even imagine I ever did things like that.”
“Why did you?”
“You know about Kevin?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, that fucked me up for a long time. So, I did a lot of things to try to get unfucked up. Drugs were involved half the time. I’m like a really different person with you.”
Fenn was satisfied by that answer. Pleased, really, and so he said:
“What else do you want to know? About me?”
“How many people have you been with?”
“I don’t know off the top of my head, but then neither would you.”
“Could you guess?”
“I’d rather not.”
“Have you ever slept with a priest?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t mean Dan Malloy. I know you were with him when you all were kids.”
“I know what you meant.”
Shocked, Todd said, “Then you… were with a real live priest?”
“Yes. It’s a long story. I’ll tell it to you one day.”
“Fenn?”
“Yes?”
“I’m going to have to go to Germany. It’s only for sixth months.”
Fenn was quiet.
“Will you still love me when I get back?”
Fenn turned his back and said, “Who says I love you now?”
Todd leaned over Fenn and pressed his mouth to his cheek, whispering, “Will you still love me?”
After a while, as one defeated, Fenn whispered: “Yes.”
Claire and Radha were coming down the hall.
“I don’t know about the party.”
“Well, know this,” Radha said. “This is your second week at college, and if you don’t get your ass up and go to a party you will be stigmized forever.”
“Actually, I think the word is stigmatized.”
“Smart ass.”
“And, also, I don’t think I believe you.”
“Okay,” Radha confessed. “In college you can stay in your room for a fucking year and change your personality whenever you feel like it. But I want to go to this party and my ex is going to be there, and I can’t go alone and the truth is I don’t really have any girlfriends because they’re all kinda bitches.”
“Fine,” Claire said, putting all the misery in her voice she could, “Let’s go.”
Radha smiled at her brightly, and said, “I’m going to put a Hindu blessing on you, girl,” and then they turned into the classroom where Jesse and another student were looking smart with his spectacles on, talking to their professor.
“Shit!” Claire said, and turned out of the room.
Radha followed her and said, “What?”
“Their professor,” Claire whispered. “I hate him.”
Radha looked into the room, looked back out and said, “Professor Babcock.”
“Brian!”
“You know him?”
“Yes.”
“Well, dish!” she commanded.
“No,” Claire shook her head, rapidly. “I can’t.”
Then the two students and their professor both came out and Jesse said, “You girls ready for some lunch?”
And Brian said, “Hello, Claire.”
“Hello, Brian,” she said, trying to sound as neutral as possible. She thought maybe she should call him professor, but he wasn’t her professor.
Brian Babcock looked like he wanted to say something else, but he only said, “I hope you all have a good day,” nodded his head and left.
The boy with Jesse looked after the departing Brian, and then Jesse said, “This is Chad,”
“Chad,” Chad said offering his hand.
“He’s usually training in the conservatory, but today he’s actually going to eat with us.”
“You know what I say,” Radha said. “The more the merrier.”
At the bottom of the steps they saw Paul coming out of class and Radha said, “You’re brother’s so cute. He’s got an Abercrombie thing going on.”
“His shirt looks like a table cloth,” Claire said and went to him.
“Are you coming to lunch with us?” she asked him. “This is Chad, by the way.”
“Pleased to meet you,” Paul shook his hand, quickly, and Chad stared at him for a moment, like he had seen him, and then said, “To meet you too.”
“Well,” Claire said again, “are you coming to lunch with us. I got Julian cooling his heels at the east commissary already.”
“Sorry,” Paul said. “I have to meet Kirk.”
“Is Kirk hot like you?” Radha said.
Paul went red.
“I think he is,” he said, at last.
“Well, where did you park?” Claire asked him, as they approached the large doors of Anselm Hall.
“Bottom of the steps. Gotta go before they ticket me.”
“Well, then we’ll walk you all the way to the bottom!” Jesse declared.
“By the way, Paul,” Radha said as they pushed open the doors and headed down the stair, “we saw Professor Babcock.”
“Professor Babcock?” Paul said.
“Brian,” Claire said levelly.
“Oh, my God. He does teach her, doesn’t he?”
“He’s really good. I’m his TA,” Chad said.
“Um,” Claire said.
“Yeah,” Radha let the ‘yeah’ hang as they came to the base of the stairs. “Why’s your sister hate him so much?”
“Hey,” said Paul.
“Hum?”
“Dan Malloy—the priest at Saint Barbara’s—he asked me to go to Mass this weekend, and I wanted to know if you wanted to go?”
“You don’t even go to church.”
“You do, though.”
“I like mine better.”
“Is there like some rivalry between Saint Barbara’s and Saint Agatha’s?”
“There’s a rivalry between all the Catholic churches in town, but I’ll come to your little Saint Barbara’s if you want me to.” Kirk affected a laugh.
“You’re not yourself,” Paul said.
“Hum?” Kirk said, and then shook his head. “Oh, I’m just distracted.”
“Well, why don’t you tell me why you’re distracted.”
“It’s not important,” Kirk said, trying to smile, and turning his glass around so the ice clinked. “It’s not even interesting.”
“Look,” Paul said. “I thought that you and me were an us.”
Kirk looked at him. “We are.”
“Then talk to me.”
“It’s our car lots,” he said.
Paul nodded for him to continue.
“People aren’t buying cars like they used to, and then, see the way dealerships get cars is you borrow money to buy them for the lot, and then people buy the cars and lately, the way the economy is, no one wants to loan us the money to get the new cars for the lots so… it’s kind of like we don’t know what to do. All I’ve been doing is moping. And going to Saint Agatha’s lighting candles. I’ve really been on pins and needles.”
“And you haven’t been telling me?”
“What could you do?”
“I could listen. I can listen and be there for you instead of you keeping it inside.”
Kirk smiled at him tightly.
“I should never have gone into the family business.”
“But if you hadn’t would you be just as worried for the rest of your family. The way I am for you?”
Kirk looked up at him.
“We’ll work through this. And I don’t mean, I’ll help you work through it. I mean we’ll work through it.
“See,” said Paul, touching Kirk’s cheek, “there it is!”
“What?”
“That smile. It’s back again.”
Kirk touched the finger on his cheek and he said, “And how’s school going for you? Along with the new play?”
Now Paul shook his head gently and said, “You know what? I thought staying at the playhouse would interfere with schoolwork, but I don’t know. It’s sort of a salvation. School… It’s something else.”
“Well, you’re really smart, so—”
“I’m not. I don’t feel smart. For about five minutes I feel smart, but then I say the wrong thing, or I fall asleep in the middle of reading something and…” Paul shook his head. “I don’t feel so smart.”
“My memory from school,” Kirk said, “is that it’s usually the people who think they’re really smart who aren’t so great. And, if I’d stayed in school, I wouldn’t be worried about my car lot.”
“You know what I found out today?” said Paul.
“Hum?”
“Well, I suppose I already knew it, but Claire was coming from upstairs in the hall where my last class is, and she told me that she’d just come from Brian’s classroom.”
“Brian? Brian-Brian?”
“Yeah.”
“He’s a teacher?”
“He’s a professor. I forget that. A doctor in musicology or something like that.”
“Are you serious?” Kirk made a noise and waved that off. “That’s not even a real degree. Musicology. That’s like getting a PhD in… painting. It’s like the academic equivalent of a chiropractor to a real doctor.”
“Yeah, maybe. But he’s there.”
“Yeah,” Kirk said too. “But you see him all the time, anyway.”
“And then there was this one kid who said he was a great teacher,” Paul added. He put his fist in his hand.
“I can hardly get through my first few weeks of college, and he’s a professor!”
“Oh,” Kirk said.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. It’s just, I mean, I understand it. Well, you don’t think Brian’s smarter than you or anything like that?”
“No.” Paul said. “Nothing like that. Only… A few weeks ago I was big shit in my world, and now… I’m some dumb guy that did dirty movies and… Brian’s like this doctor.”
“Of musicology,” Kirk said. “Which is hardly physics.”
“You think if I just keep telling myself that I’ll feel better?”
“That’s would I would do,” Kirk said frankly.