After the unseemly end to my first visit to the Continental Baths you might have thought that I wouldn't have had the nerve to go back. And that's the way it might have turned out, but for one of our stewardesses! Yes, a woman, Pat. (Since this is a gay archive I won't dwell on the details of what exactly transpired. Suffice it to say that anyone who wants to read the unexpurgated truth just drop me an e-mail.) In brief, it was a wet Sunday afternoon in winter, to my enormous surprise she wanted to go to a blue movie. We looked in the papers to see what was on and settled on one only because it was fairly close by. What I thought was a blue movie, as in straight, guys n' gals blue, turned out to be very gay, guys on guys, gals on gals, and far more graphic than anything I'd seen in The Hudson. From time to time I stole furtive looks at my companion, she seemed to be fascinated. I would have thoroughly enjoyed watching the men in action, but the trouble was that the sight of those naked guys had my cock straining at my jeans; and it was plainly visible too! I sat through the show wondering if she'd drawn any conclusions from my predicament, somehow I had to find out, and correct her opinion if she had jumped to the correct conclusion.
"What did you think of it?" I asked straight-faced as we walked out of the cinema.
"Fantastic!" she answered with real enthusiasm. I was both surprised and relieved.
"Were you shocked?"
"Shocked?" she asked, "Of course not! Did it shock you?" This was just the question I'd hoped to avoid.
"Well I hadn't expected it turn out that way..." I said vaguely.
"So? Does it make a difference? Sex is meant to be fun. If two people want to get it on what's to be ashamed of. Doesn't matter if it's a man and woman...two women...two men. Or a whole gang for that matter. Just as long as everyone's enjoying themselves, that's the only thing that matters. Don't die wondering, just do it! That's what I always say."
I visualized the scene in the steam-room in the Continental Baths, those men would certainly meet Pat's criteria, they were enjoying themselves that's for sure. Over the next couple of months the memory of the beautiful, healthy, naked men who were not ashamed of their sexuality kept coming back in the small hours of the night, especially during long ocean crossings when there's little to do. Images of the cocks and balls, of guys sucking, rimming and fucking kept floating in my mind anytime I wasn't fully occupied. My nurture told me I should have been disgusted, I wasn't. Still, I wasn't sure that I'd have the nerve to go back. However, Pat's very happy outlook on life and all things sexual gradually sank in and helped me see things in a different light. I began to think of sex with men as almost normal, or at least as something I could try without being turned into a raging queer. Finally I convinced myself that I could do it. Many weeks later in the crew bus on the way into town from JFK as the other crew members were discussing plans for the evening I knew I wouldn't be joining them. By this time the feeling of failure had faded. The thought of going back was scary, but I knew I would go again.
This time I had a couple of stiff drinks out of my 'duty free' before setting out. I would have liked a couple more, but I didn't want to be drunk, just a bit less inhibited. I also did one other thing, I swore an oath to
myself that I wouldn't leave the baths until I'd had sex with a man. I nearly included being fucked, but decided to wait and see what transpired. That sort settled my mind, I was going to lose my virginity one way or another.
Again my heart was racing as I waited in line in the lobby. Again I took a room. Looking back on it I should have taken a locker, I'd have had nowhere to run to and hide. But at the time it was a great comfort to have a bolt hole, and I continued to pay for rooms for some time, even when I had got into the action. I was just as hard this time, but the towel was big enough. I tied it tight, low over my hips, trapping my cock so that it didn't stick out in front. I felt much more confident. It's strange, I always wanted my cock to hang limp so that I could look relaxed, casual, cool, yet in all the years that I went to the baths I was always hard, for hours on end. Sometimes, towards the end of a long evening, my balls ached so badly I could hardly bare to have them touched, but that was good too! I suppose there were plenty of other guys who wished they could keep their cocks up to look hot. Certainly my hard cock got a lot of attention, but I still wanted
it to hang soft, to look cool.
I headed for the basement again, to the steam-room. As I came down the stairs I saw a steady stream of men going in so I knew there'd be some action going on. As I walked around the pool to the entrance my mind was racing. I wondered briefly whether I'd be cautious and go in wearing my towel, but that only lasted a few moments, I went in naked. Inside the door I was enveloped in the hot steam again. I no longer felt naked, the place was familiar and I felt comfortable in the darkness. I stood just inside the second alcove waiting for my eyes to adjust to the dim red light. I had been standing there for a couple of minutes when a hand came around from behind me and stroked my cock and balls. I got a fright, but not as bad as the last
time. The man must have felt it, his soft voice came from just a few inches behind me.
"Its alright, just relax."
Well I didn't relax, I was breathing very hard, but I didn't run. With one hand he continued to stroke my genitals, the other was sliding up and down my back trying to calm me down. He must have felt me trembling, asked me if this was my first visit to the baths. I tried to speak, nothing came out. He assumed that it was: told me that he knew how I felt: that he could still remember his first time: that he had been almost sick with fear. He was describing my feeling exactly! His hands continued to caress, he assured me
that I was safe in these baths, there was no need for fear, nobody had ever been hurt, anything I wanted would be available when I felt confident enough to take it. He moved closer to me, I could feel his cock just under my ass, it wasn't fully erect, but stiffening. As it grew stronger I felt it pushing at the back of my thighs, I parted my legs to let it slide between them, then squeezed tightly. I cannot tell you what was going on in my head at this time, I was in a complete turmoil. Wanted him to do everything to me, everything I had seen and read about, but I also wanted to get away. The stroking was just out of this world, more beautiful than anything I had ever experienced with a woman. Suddenly he stopped, dropped to his knees, then
turned me round so that we were facing each other. I felt my penis being sucked into his hot, wet mouth. It was sensational, I really wanted to come right then, wanted to have my first real homosexual act, yet something blocked the flow. (I still find it very difficult to come standing up, for me it is so much better when I am lying down and stretched out.) Also, I'd only been in the place about twenty minutes, I didn't want to come so soon.
Eventually I pulled away from his mouth. I told him that I had just arrived and wanted to check out the place. It wasn't a lie, nor the whole truth. I felt that I shouldn't have let him go that far if I wasn't going to let him have my juice, that he might be pissed off, or feel slighted that I wouldn't come for him. But he was very gracious, told me that I had a beautiful body, that he would love to bring me off when I was ready. If I came back to the steam-room from time to time we'd meet again and he would finish what we had started. That is something that never failed to surprise me in the baths, all the guys seemed to accept that if you didn't want to come you could break off at any time. Strange when you read that men rape women and then
say that they had been aroused to such an extent that they could not stop themselves. I was also enormously impressed by the gentleness of men I met in the baths, not just the ones I had sex with, but all of them, almost without exception. I wouldn't have been surprised if the macho types had been rough with the more effeminate ones, but never saw any sign of it.
After leaving him I made my way further into the steam. In the main chamber there was a gang bang in progress, could have been twenty or thirty guys in a seething mass of bodies, but it wasn't possible to see them all let alone count them. This time I actually had the nerve to get within arm's length of them, and sure enough a hand reached out for my cock. I didn't back away as I had done on my first visit, but allowed myself to be drawn into the melee. It was like being captured by a multi-armed creature. One hand was pumping my cock, another was fondling my balls, a finger was probing my hole, someone else was tweaking my nipples. I found a cock with my right hand, then my left hand located a pair of balls to play with, in short I was in heaven. I really didn't want to come yet, but the first guy had brought me close to the edge. When a mouth replaced the hand that had been pumping my cock, and with all the other sensations that were flooding my brain I knew I couldn't hold out. Just when I thought my balls would explode the finger that was probing my hole was thrust up hard against the resistance of my sphinctre. It was just too painful. By this time I was enveloped in the mass of bodies. I was tremendously turned on by the sucking and fondling, but I couldn't take the pain in my hole, just had to break free and get away. Eventually I forced my way through the bodies, but instead of feeling like a failure I was on a high. 'I've done it!' I thought. 'I've given myself to a whole lot of men. They've touched every bit of my body, I didn't hold back, let them have my cock, my balls, and if only that guy had used some lubrication in my hole I'd have come too!' I can't tell you how good that made me feel. I knew I was going to be able to come for a man.
When I did get free I made my way out of the steam-room, and with my head in a whirl I came out of the second door, not the one where I'd hung my towel when I'd gone in. I was naked, and still hard. A lot of gorgeous looking men were playing in and around the swimming pool that was just outside the
steam-room, all totally uninhibited. There was no diving board, but one them climbed up on the stainless-steel hand rails which were on each side of the steps into the pool, quite a neat trick with wet feet. He got one foot up on each rail and stood up not more than five feet from me. He had a truly beautiful body, an athlete. I could see the beads of water running down his skin, shining in his pubic hair, his soft, relaxed cock was five inches long, and best of all, his balls swung between his legs in a sac fully six inches long. When he got up he stood there for a moment, a magnificent sight, legs spread wide, everything on view, not the least bit self-conscious, then he dived into the water. I dived in too, it felt so good! Very warm, every movement sent water swirling, millions of bubbles swarmed all over my naked body. Being so close to the guys that I had been watching kept me hot and hard. I couldn't see the bodies of those in the water, nor could they see mine under the reflecting surface, but I could visualize what they looked like and I was within inches of them. I could have touched them, but I didn't dare. I swam up and down the length of the pool enjoying the wild sensations. I noticed that the others spent as much time under the water as above. It wasn't a big pool, maybe thirty feet by fifteen, so I decided to swim the length underwater. I sank down beneath the surface and kicked off from one end, I hadn't gone ten feet when I almost swam into a group of three men struggling in the water. With the bright lights above the pool, and more lights under the water along each side,
visibility was excellent. I could see every detail of their bodies, and it was all magnified enormously as everything is under water. What a sight, I had never seen men's bodies so clearly, they were only about three feet from my eyes and being under water they seemed even closer. I just stopped swimming and floated to the surface. Now I knew why they spent so much time diving.
There were a couple of inflated inner tubes floating in the pool, big fat ones about four feet across. One was occupied by about a dozen guys who were climbing on to it, and being knocked off again. There was nobody using the other one. I swam over to it, came up inside the floating ring, pulled myself up on to it. I found that I could lie across it with the back of my neck on one side and my legs over the other. I spread them apart so that the water surged up and down over my cock and balls. Quite delightful, and best of all, when my ass was right down in the middle, my dick was below the surface so I was able to lie there looking as casual as any of the other guys. The ones playing with the other ring were all around me, but I wasn't part of their game. I was totally relaxed when a finger was thrust into my asshole. This time it did go past my sphinctre, I guess being wet helped a lot. This came as a complete surprise! I must have lifted clear of the ring and as I came down a head appeared between my legs. He was very young, short, black, curly hair, grinning broadly, obviously amused by the strong reaction. He raised himself up on the ring and was about to take my cock
into his mouth when he realized that he'd surfaced under the wrong ring. As he grasped what had happened his smile faded, he blushed furiously, and his friends seeing his mistake started to tease him unmercifully. I stayed a while longer, in the ring and under the water enjoying the sights.
Later that evening I got into conversation with a guy, I didn't pretend to be anything but a novice. I told him what had happened with the first man in the steam-room and asked him how I should have handled the situation.
"There's no problem," he said. "The thing to remember is that every guy in the building wants all he can get, as much sucking, fucking, rimming, fisting, whatever. Everything is available, every form of perversion. But a man can only come once or twice a night, maybe a third time if his balls are really squeezed hard. I personally don't think it is worth struggling to get a third shot out of any man's balls, all you ever get is a watery dribble. Not even Superman can please all the men in this building. You pay to get in, you take what you can get, you give when you are ready to the man you choose." That was the way he saw it and I suppose he was right. With hundreds of men all looking for sex there was no way of pleasing every one of them.
The basement was largely taken up with the pool, steam-room, sauna and dance floor. There was also a small snack bar, a video room with a large screen projection TV showing gay videos, and a corridor leading to some rooms and lockers. I looked into the video room. it wasn't big, maybe 15 feet square, and devoid of furnishings except for large, over-stuffed cushions scattered about the floor. All the cushions were occupied except one, I made my way through the prone bodies, mostly lying in pairs. The movie being shown wouldn't raise any eyebrows now, but back then, when it was against the law in the States to show a penis that was more than semi-erect, they were quite remarkable. Close-ups of very erect penises thrusting into very wet ass-holes, I mean full screen, four feet across! Even the veins on the shafts were very visible, and when the guys ejaculated the camera zoomed right in on the cockhead, you almost felt the splashes. I sat cross-legged and leaning forward slightly, that way the bulge under my towel wouldn't be noticed, or so I thought. It wasn't long before the guy lying on my right moved a bit closer, then a bit closer still. By the time he made his move I was barely breathing at all. First the back of his left hand brushed against the outside of my thigh. I moved my knee slightly, just a millimetre towards him. His hand slid up over the top of my leg to the inside of my thigh and I was back in heaven again. Knowing now that I didn't have to give to every guy, I was now a bit more relaxed. Soon I was living the sucking I was watching on the screen. He just kept working my balls very gently as he sucked the whole length of my cock down his throat. He kept this up for quite a while, why I didn't come I don't know, maybe my inhibitions were still blocking the flow. I was surprised that he kept going without a pay off, but another problem was gradually making itself felt: I really needed a piss. Eventually I had to ease myself away, he thanked me as though I'd done him a favour whereas I thought that I was the one who owed thanks for the pleasure he'd given me.
By this time my nuts were beginning to ache, blue balls, I had to come and I was absolutely NOT going to run away from it this time. I went back to the steam-room in the hope of meeting up with the guy who had been there earlier. Didn't find him, or if he was there I didn't recognize him. He had been gentle, he would have done it well, I wished that I'd arranged a time to meet him. Well, my original idea had been to go into the dormitory and see what happened, so that's where I went. I told you in the last chapter that the dormitory was a large room, that the only light was what filtered in from the entrance set at about the middle of one side. Away from the entrance the light faded rapidly to darkness. As before most of the men going in turned to the right, they slipped off their towels, dropped them on one of the bunks, then disappeared into the darkness. I wasn't ready for that. A few went in and turned to the left. There was just a bit more light
looking that way so that's the way I headed. I went as far as the last bed that I could see and climbed up on to the top bunk. My idea was to lie there until my eyes adjusted to the dark, and then decide what to do next. Well that was the plan. I lay facedown, I really can't say why, maybe I was subconsciously hiding my cock and balls. It seems stupid I know considering that I was there to get sucked off, but I believe that is why I did it. My heart was racing, I could hear the thumping in my ears. I thought it would slow down soon if I lay still, but in less than a minute I felt the very light touch of a fingertip on the inside of my right ankle. My heart went faster than ever. I lay absolutely still, hardly able to breathe, waiting to see what would happen. The hand paused for quite a while, seemed like several minutes, but I suppose it was several seconds, then very, very lightly the fingertips slid up the inside of my calf, the inside of my thigh, brushed the back of my scrotum, then up over my ass. I really did not know what to do. I did know that the time had come, that this man was going to take my cum, but I was frozen on the bed. After a moment or two the hand started stroking the inside of my thigh again moving slowly towards my balls, at last I got the courage to respond, I lifted my hips up off the bed, just a little, to allow him to get at my testicles. He needed no more encouragement. In an instant he had them in his hand, rolling them around very gently with his fingers. When he reached further under my body and felt my rigid cock he got a grip on it and started pumping it. He tried to pull it out from under my body by bending it down between my legs, but I was so hard there was no way he could have done it without breaking it off. I knew that the time had come so I rolled over on to my side. With that his hands
were all over my body. He was really excited, scrambled up on to the bunk, turned me on to my back, spread my legs wide and knelt between them. The next thing I felt was my balls being sucked into his mouth. God it was wonderful! First one, then the other, then both. I could have come in an instant, but was determined to make it last as long as I possibly could. I don't suppose it was more than a couple of minutes, but I was in ecstasy. Ejaculating is always a wonderful feeling, but this time was something special, there were no fanfares, no flashing lights, it wasn't a public exhibition with a lot of guys watching that I had fantasized about, but it was special. At last I had overcome my inhibitions and fears, I'd given him my body, held nothing back, and he'd taken me. After he'd drained my balls he slipped up along the length of my body to give me a light kiss on the lips, then started to move away. But I wanted more, I put my hand behind his
head, pulled him closer, then kissed him with an open mouth. He responded immediately, his tongue penetrating deep. I felt the slipperiness, my semen.
"What's your name," I asked quietly. I wanted to know his name, really wanted to remember him by his name, not just that guy who'd first sucked me off.
"Nick," he said. I'd hoped that he'd be a Jason, or Damion, Kirk would be okay too, or something theatrical maybe. But he was Nick, at least I hadn't given my semen to an anonymous face, I knew his name. He was still lying on my body, I could feel his cock hard against my stomach.
"Nick," I said, "you're the first guy who's ever brought me off."
"You're kidding! First time?" He found it difficult to believe. "Not even in high school? Not with any of your friends?" He just couldn't understand how anyone could have got as far as going to the baths without a lot of previous experience. When I'd convinced him he seemed to be even better pleased than before. I felt that I ought to suck him off in return for the favour he'd done me, but as we lay together talking time caught up with me. It was around two in the morning in New York, that was 7am for my body clock.
"Can I suck you too?" I asked.
"Oh no boy, I've come twice already tonight" I was disappointed, but relieved too. We lay together for while longer, then parted with another kiss.
I felt good as I made my way back to the hotel. I'd let men suck my cock, it had been so exciting, terrific, fantastic! I felt sure that Pat would have approved and I had every intention of trying everything: sucking, fucking and being fucked too.