The alarm on my phone woke me up at 8. I lay there for a minute or so, getting used to the day, then I made my way downstairs. I could hear my mum and dad talking, and I could smell the coffee - Chris said his day didn't start until he'd had a cigarette while for my dad it was a big cup of strong coffee.

'Merry Christmas, Greg,' my mum said as she came over and kissed me.

'Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, dad,' I said as I went over and hugged him.

'Come on,' my mum said, 'let's see what Santa's left for you.' Even though I had a big hunky boyfriend who they let stay the night, I guess I was still their little Greg.

I picked up Chris's present first and read the tag. 'Open me last!' it read.

'Who's that from?' my dad asked.

'Chris. It says to open it last.'

'You'd better do what the boy says!' he replied.

As I opened my presents my parents opened theirs. 'Oh, thanks Greg,' my mum said, reading the back of the books I'd bought her. 'I've heard really good things about these. I'm sure I'll love them.'

My dad was equally happy with his Band of Brothers, and when it came to my presents, it seemed like the subtle hint I'd dropped about Timberland boots had been picked up. I recognised some of the things I'd seen with mum, but she'd also been daring enough to choose some things herself - all of which I approved of. I guess she'd decided against getting me a jacket, as it wasn't among any of the presents.

'Oh, nearly forgot about this,' my dad said, reaching behind his armchair. He produced a big package, and when I lifted it up it was quite heavy and a little squashy.

'What's this?'

'Open it and see,' my mum said eagerly. 'Hope you like it. It's not one that you chose, but I hope it's ok.'

I ripped open the wrapping paper and found a leather jacket.

'WOW!!' I exclaimed. 'How did you know??' I was really taken aback. I undid the zip and saw the label said Schott NYC. 'This must've cost a fortune!'

'Well, you're worth it, son,' my dad said. 'Go on, try it on.'

I put it on and did up the zip. It fit like a glove.

'It's a 'Classic Racer', if that means anything,' my mum said.

'How did you know I wanted one?' I asked again, still surprised.

'Well, a little birdie told me. And he may also have helped me choose one. He said you'd suit it.'

'It's fantastic. But after the wardrobes and stuff you really shouldn't have done.'

'But you needed those, and this is Christmas. I'm happy you like it.'

'Like it? I love it.'

Once I'd finished opening the other presents I went back to Chris's present. I had no idea what it could be. Underneath the message to open it last, he'd written, 'Something a bit different... Love Chris x'

'Any idea what it could be?' my mum asked.

'A book... I think, but no idea.' I slowly peeled off the paper. Then screwed up my face.

'What is it?' my dad asked.

'Er... 'Higher History Grade Booster'...'

'Oh. That's a bit... different.'

I opened the book and a piece of paper fell on the floor. 'Go and look in the drawer,' it read. I dashed upstairs and opened Chris's drawer, and inside was a wrapped present. When on earth had he had time to put it in there? I ran back down. 'Did you know about this?' I asked my parents.

'No,' my mum replied, 'honest.'

The present felt hard, like a book, but seemed a bit thin. The tag read, 'I need that book back, by the way!' I tore open the paper, and inside was a pencil sketch he had done of us together. I had no idea he could draw and it was an excellent picture - him in his leather jacket and me in my new one, with his arm around my shoulder. He was looking mean and moody - ok, and a little bit sexy - and I had warm smile on my face. He really had captured us both well.

'Let's see,' my mum said. 'Oh, very good! That's a very good likeness. Of both of you. He's a very talented boy.'

'Yeah,' I smiled. My boy.

'Oh look,' my mum said, 'there's something on the back.'

There was a small envelope stuck to the back with Blu-tac. I peeled it off and opened it. I smiled and blushed a little.

'What is it?' my dad asked.

'Er...' I read the piece of paper, a little embarrassed. 'This voucher entitles the bearer to one free body piercing at Holey Moley.'

My dad let out a loud laugh. My mum shook her head.

'So,' my dad began, with a twinkle in his eye, 'what do you think you'll get?' He brought his hands up to his nipples and tweaked them. 'Honk honk.'

I laughed. 'I don't know. Yet!'

'Honk honk.'

My mum gave a little giggle. 'How about you Joe? I could drive a big sharp needle right through your chest if you like!' My dad laughed again.

Before showering I called Chris. 'Merry Christmas!' I shouted down the phone.

'Jesus! What time is it? You woke me up!' He sounded very sleepy.

'9:30. Leaving for church soon. Thought I'd call and thank you for the present. Well, the presents.'

'You like the picture?'

'It's fantastic. I never knew you could draw. Funny how you knew what my leather jacket looked like.'

'Yeah, funny that,' he replied. I could hear the smile in his voice.

'I'd better go. I have to shower first. Enjoy your day with the fam. Bye.'


The rest of the day was pretty much like any other Christmas at our house. Since I was now able to drive, at midday I went over to pick up my gran, and when I got back, my dad's sister Laura was there with her kids - Billy, who was nine, and Grace, who was 6. Her husband Jack worked on the oil rigs, and this Christmas he had to work.

Billy showed me one of his new presents, a DSi, and he showed me all the cool things it could do. Grace also showed me her favourite new present, two My Little Ponies and some sort of beauty parlour for them.

About 20 minutes before we were due to sit down for Christmas Dinner, Grace ran down stairs, clutching the picture Chris had drawn of me. My jaw dropped and my eyes popped out of my head. Apart from my parents, none of my family knew I was gay, and I hadn't really planned on telling my gran. Ever. She was old, she wouldn't understand.

'Who's that, Greg?' she asked.

I shot a look at my mum.

There was a pause.

'That's Greg's boyfriend,' my mum said, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Grace giggled. 'Don't be silly, boys don't have BOYfriends!'

'Some do,' my aunt Laura said. Phew!

She giggled again. 'Does he like ponies?'

Ah, the mind of a child! 'I don't know,' I replied. 'I'll ask him the next time I see him.' Billy was too engrossed in his new toy to notice what was going on.

My aunt smiled across to me. She took the picture from Grace and, looking at it, she nodded her head in approval. 'Very nice,' she said.

'Let me see that,' my gran snapped, taking it from Aunt Laura. Oh shit. I could now picture us all sitting down for dinner in a stony silence. 'Oh, what a hunk!' she said. Aunt Laura and my mum both laughed. 'Well he is. I bet he has a nice six-pack!' Where did my gran know the phrase 'six-pack' from? At that point my dad walked from the kitchen into the living room. As he passed my gran she ran her hand over his stomach and said, 'Not a jelly belly like your dad!'

'Careful, old woman,' my dad said, 'you might find yourself in the oven with that turkey!'

There followed an interrogation over where we had met, what he was like, what his parents did. All the usual questions.

'Do you kiss him?' Grace asked, giggling.

'Yes,' I replied. She giggled some more. 'He can play with my Starsong and Scootaloo,' she said, holding up her ponies.

'I'll let him know.'

'Does he have any Transformers?' Billy asked.

'I don't think so. I think he's too old for Transformers.' He tutted. 'He liked the film, though.'


The rest of Christmas Day panned out like all the others. My mum had insisted she'd sit down and watch the Queen's Speech for once, but of course didn't. My dad made a big performance of him cooking Christmas Dinner - my mum peeled, chopped and cooked all the veg, and made a trifle AND a tiramisu. My dad, on the other hand, put the turkey in the over for a few hours, but in his head that was him cooking Christmas Dinner.

After the turkey and before the desserts we sat down to watch Dr Who. I don't like it much, but Billy is a huge fan and my dad quite likes it. After about 20 minutes I felt my pocket vibrate. It was a text from Chris.

'Zzzz. Dr Who. How u? Survivn? Belly full. No cigs. Life sux. x'

I replied. 'Dr Who here 2. Belly full 2. Gran wondrs if u got 6pak. Cousn wants 2 no if u like ponies. U got any Trnsfrmrs? x'

'U need a remindr of my chest? W8 till Mon. Ponies yes. Trnsfrms... yes. U h8 me?'

'Chris said he likes ponies,' I told Grace. She giggled. Why do girls giggle so much? 'And he's got some Transformers,' I told Billy.

'Cool!' was his reply. That seemed to be the only word he used all day.

'Cousn mad on Trnsfrmrs. Not h8 u but startn 2 worry. Njoy rest of Who. xx'

I started to imagine a little Chris playing with Transformers. I couldn't quite picture it, so I started to think of his naked chest instead. Much better.

Soon enough it was time to take my gran home, and I loved pulling on my leather jacket. I loved the smell, I loved the feel, and I loved the sound the leather made. On the ride to her house, my gran told me about a friend she'd had, just after the war, who was gay.

'Of course, they didn't call it gay then. They called it a sickness. People were even sent to jail, you know?' I was shocked. 'But he was one of the nicest men I've ever known. Very polite and considerate, and he'd do anything for you. A lovely, lovely man. I hope your Chris is a bit like him.'

'I think he is.'

'Good, son, good.'

On the way back home I drove past Chris's house to see if he was there, but the lights were off so I just went home. We couldn't meet on Saturday as Chris had to go and see his dad's side of the family, and in the evening I had to chauffeur my parents around as they were going to see some people and they wanted to drink. Sunday, however, Chris came over, and he stayed the night again.

As soon as he came through the door, the first thing my dad said to him, in a stern and serious voice, was, 'So, I believe you think it's appropriate for our son to get a body piercing.'

'Er... uh... uh...' Chris spluttered.

'He's having you on!' I said.

Dad then tweaked his nipples again. 'Honk honk.' Chris laughed.

After tea we watched the Blu-ray I'd got of Quantum of Solace, and even my mum joined us. Something about Daniel Craig being dreamy, although I can't see it myself. Chris and I even sat next to each other on the couch and it didn't feel too weird. Well, after half an hour or so it didn't feel weird.

When my parents had gone to bed and we were finally alone, I snaked my arm across Chris's chest and pulled him over for a long, serious snog. We twisted around on the couch so that I was now lying on top of Chris. I ran my fingers through his hair and I could feel his muscular legs encircle mine. His arms came around my shoulders and I willingly squeezed our bodies tighter together. It had only been a few days since we'd last seen each other, but the passion in his kiss was like a soldier returning from war.

He broke it off and said, 'Go and put your jacket on. I want to see what you look like.' I went over and took it off the peg. 'Go on,' he said, encouraging me. I slipped my arms in the sleeves but didn't do it up. He stood up and came over, looking into my eyes the whole time. Suddenly his right hand reached for my crotch while his left hand went behind my head and pulled me in for a kiss. As Chris kneaded my crotch, his hand held our faces tight together, small moans escaping as our lips parted.

He then took his hand and ran it under the waistband of my jeans. His right hand now loosened its hold on my head and found its way around my neck, allowing us to pull apart and let our tongues clash and dive in mid air. God he was making me horny!

I put my arms around his back and slipped them under his jeans, massaging his bum cheeks.

Chris moved his head back. 'You look...' He paused. Then he started to kiss me again. His hands now pushed my jacket off my shoulders and it fell onto the floor in a heap.

I broke off the kiss again. 'I think we'd better continue this upstairs. We don't want to be... interrupted.' His eyes sparkled.

I hung my jacket up and we padded upstairs, trying not to make too much noise. I could hear my dad snoring already, and I presumed my mum was asleep as well. I delicately closed the door, and when I turned around Chris was right in my face, his lips on mine.

'I feel like we haven't done it for week,' he grinned. I walked him backwards toward the bed, removing his hoodie and t-shirt as I did so. 'Thanks for the hoodie,' he said as I tossed it on the floor.'

I smiled. I had one thing on my mind right now and it wasn't fashion. I tore off my sweatshirt and Chris lifted up my t-shirt. Our naked chests crashed against each other, our arms exploring each other's backs. I kissed Chris's cheek, then his neck and as I kissed down his neck I stopped at his nipples, lightly sucking one then the other. I then went back to the first, flicking it with my tongue, kissing it, lavishing it with attention. As I kissed down his chest my hands were on automatic pilot, undoing his belt buckle, undoing the zip and forcing everything down. I then gave small kisses down from his belly button to just above his pubes. My hand gripped his hard cock and gave slow pumps. I could hear him inhaling deeply then letting out a long sigh.

I held up his cock and flicked the underside with my tongue, going up and down, and kissing the head when I got to the top. I then licked up and down his cock while my hand rolled his balls around in my palm. Going back up one final time I gave small kisses all the way up before taking his engorged head into my hungry mouth. And then I started to suck. I paid close attention to his cockhead, with my tongue dancing around it while it was in my mouth. I only took a few inches and I let my hand pump the bottom half of his cock.

I reached my hands up and guided him to sit on the bed, separating his legs. I positioned myself between his legs and let my arms wander around his back, gently running them across his back, up and down, my fingers dancing, my nails slightly scraping.

I could hear his breathing getting deeper and deeper and I knew he was really enjoying this blowjob. Small moans escaped his mouth and when I looked up I saw him biting his lip, both eyes closed, lost in the pleasure.

I took more and more of his cock into my mouth, and it was now no problem to combat the gag reflex when I deep throated him. 'Ohhhh!' he cried out when I had taken him all the way. And he gave another deep sigh. I sucked his cock for another minute before I stood up. He looked up at me, smiling. 'Let's get you naked,' he said, a glint in his eyes.

As I was undoing my jeans he stood up and came behind me. With my jeans now off and halfway across the room I felt him start to kiss my neck and he reached his arms around to find my engorged cock, his chest pressed against my back. I reached behind and started to massage his bum cheeks and I could feel him starting to grind his cock into my arse, rubbing up and down the crack. Then the hand that had been lightly caressing my chest was now lining up his cock with my hole. And then it was through. I stood there, ecstasy washing over my body. Both of his hands were now exploring my chest as his cock retreated and advanced up my hole.

I gave a deep sigh.

I took his left hand and started to suck on one of his fingers while his dick continued to massage my prostate. Chris started to edge backwards, and with his cock buried in my arse I had to follow, not knowing what he was going to do. He then slowly sat down on my swivel chair, slowly enough to make sure that his cock stayed inside me. And then I was fully impaled on his dick. And oh fuck did it feel good. With my hands on the armrests of my chair for support I started to go up and down on his dick, slowly, but taking pleasure with each invasion of my hole. His right hand was now pumping my dick again, faster than before, but not fast enough that he would make me cum any time soon. And I kept riding his dick, up and down, savouring every minute.

I built up some speed and soon became aware that I was now breathing heavily. Chris widened his legs slightly to give me access to the last few millimetres of his dick, and I was now taking his cock all the way. It was rock hard and it was driving me wild. I leaned back and turned my head to kiss him, our lips locking and our tongues exploring with wild abandon. And still I continued to milk his cock. His hand was now jacking my dick faster and faster, and with his cock hitting that magic spot I knew it wouldn't before long before I shot my load.

Chris kissed my neck then my shoulder, and his left hand was now searching out my left nipple, rubbing it gently back and forth, then rolling it between his thumb and his finger. How sensitive would it feel once it had a ring through it? I could only imagine.

'Let's get into bed,' I said breathlessly.

His cock was out of my arse for only a matter of seconds before it was back in, this time with Chris lying on top of me, looking into my eyes. He kept up the rhythm, but this time I took over wanking my own cock. As he slammed into my arse, I could feel his balls bang against my bum cheeks.

I stretched my legs as wide as I could, exposing as much of my hungry hole as he needed. His head came down and his tongue searched out mine, sending sparks flying. I could hardly focus on his face, my eyelids closing and my eyes rolling back in my head. We were both now panting, unable to produce anything other than groans of pleasure.

After a few more minutes, I said, 'I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum.'

As the first spurt of cum blasted out of my cock, my eyes popped open in time to see Chris's body started to judder. Another blast from my hard cock and now Chris was unloading himself inside of me. Although he had stopped slamming into my arse, his cock was still blasting out his cum, each volley accompanied by a grunt of ecstasy.

Finally he stopped, and collapsed on top of me. I took his head in my hands and started to kiss him, my tongue working its way into his mouth. He rolled off and lay beside me and seeing my cum now smeared on his chest he wiped it up with a finger and licked it off before kissing me again, passing a little of my cum into my own mouth.

He then lay back and gave a deep sigh. 'Not bad,' he said with a grin.

Just then we heard the toilet flush. We looked at each other in surprise then chuckled quietly. I recognised the slippers shuffling back to the bedroom as my mum's. 'I guess the bathroom's free,' I said with a grin.


We lay beside one another, with my head on his shoulder. His breathing became shallower until I wasn't sure if he was asleep or not. I looked up to see a big smile on his face.

'I don't think anyone in the history of the world enjoys sex as much as I do with you,' he said in a quiet voice.

I didn't know what to say. I lay there for a moment, trying to think of something profound or romantic, but nothing came to me.

'Damn you,' I said eventually. 'There's nothing I can say to that.'

'Yeah, and you're the one who's supposedly helping me with English! Useless, you are, useless!' He grinned and brought his head down to kiss me.

'Come on,' I said, 'we'd better get washed up.'

We both went for a shower, and when we were back in bed, naked except for our boxers, Chris said, 'So, have you thought about what you're gonna get pierced?'

'I thought probably my left nipple.'

'Mm,' he replied.

'I'd thought about getting a Prince Albert, but maybe I don't want to wait six weeks before I can use my dick again. It might forget all it's learned.'

He smiled. 'Yeah, I was thinking the same. Although how cool would it be to have your dick pierced at school?'

'I know! Nobody'd believe us. We might have to show them.'

'Yeah, trade one view for one blowjob. I know one slut who would happily comply.'

'Lucy', we said together, laughing.

I reached over and turned off my lamp and Chris did the same. In the darkness I could just make out his goatee. I put my hand up to his face and ran my thumb through the little tuft of hair on his chin. 'Do you think it's gonna hurt?' I asked.

'It's not a question of if, but how much.'

'Yeah, suppose you're right.' I paused. 'Can I tell you something?'

'Of course.'

As I intertwined my legs with his, I let my arm drape across his chest. 'I'd actually thought of getting you a piercing for Christmas as well.'

'Really?' I could feel his hand start to caress my arm, softly, gently, his thumb making gentle circular movements against my hand.

'Yeah,' I laughed. 'But decided against it.'


'Well, I thought that inflicting so much pain on the one you love wasn't the best way to celebrate Christmas.'

He laughed. 'I never thought about it like that.'

'I'm glad you didn't.'

He kissed my forehead. We lay like that for a few minutes before I said, 'Good night, Chris.'

'Good night,' and he kissed my forehead again. And then I was asleep.


The next morning at breakfast my dad said, 'So, what have you boys got planned? Buying anything in the sales?'

'Well, there's one shop we have to go to,' I said. 'Honk honk.'

My dad laughed. 'That's going to hurt, you know.'

'Yeah,' Chris replied, 'but it's not like we're drunk and getting a blunt needle to stick through them!'

My dad laughed. 'You've got a point there.' He looked down at his own nipples and shook his head. 'Rather you than me.'

'Well don't come crying to me if you rip it out in the middle of the night,' my mum said to me with a big smile.

'I'll try not to,' Chris replied. We all laughed.

We got a lift into town with my mum and dad who had decided to see if they could find any bargains in the sales. The dropped us off a few streets from Holey Moley and as we walked, Chris said, 'Oh, I forgot to tell you. I phoned Jack's cousin, the owner of the club. He said we can go on Hogmanay if we like. Usually it's tickets only for New Year, but if we use the special password, we can get in. You up for it?'

I thought about it for a second. 'Not got any better offers!'

We arrived at the tattoo and piercing studio and went inside. It was surprisingly empty, with only a teenage girl and her mum who were looking at butterfly tattoos, and a goth-looking guy who wanted to get his ears gauged. I stuffed my hands in my pockets and tried to look nonchalant, but the butterflies in my stomach were turning into a flock of seagulls. While we waited for the receptionist to finish with the goth and the teenager we had a look at the tattoos.

'You ever think of getting one?' Chris asked.

'No, I've never really got them. I just think they're ugly.'

'So you think I should cancel my appointment?'

Oh shit, I was so embarrassed. 'Sorry, I didn't mean...'

'I'm kidding!!' he laughed. 'I don't like them much either. Especially those tribal things. Just a bunch of squiggles as far as I'm concerned.'

'Yeah, I agree.'

He could see I was nervous. 'Relax, ok? It'll be fine. It won't be as bad as you think. One little prick and...'

'Are you talking about my dick or the needle?'

Chris smiled.

'Can I help you?' came a voice from behind us. It was the female receptionist. You could never mistake that she worked in a tattoo parlour. Her right arm was covered in them, and she had what appeared to be a spider's web on her neck.

'Yeah, we have these vouchers for piercings,' I said.

'Cool,' she replied. 'Come over here and see what we have.'

We went over to a display cabinet that was full of rings, horseshoe rings and barbells. 'Oh, I never thought about it before,' I said. 'I just thought about a plain ring.'

'Ok, that's fine, and what about you?' she asked Chris.

'Yeah, same for me.'

'Any idea about the size?'

We both looked at each other.

'What's best?' Chris asked.

She took out 2 rings about the size of a penny and a few millimetres thick and said, 'How about these?'

We both shrugged our shoulders and said they'd be fine.

'You know,' she said, 'since it's Christmas, if you want, you could each get both done for no extra charge.'

We both looked at each other again. 'Fuck it,' I said, 'why not.' Chris smiled.

After waiting what seemed like an eternity for the piercer to finish with the previous guy, we were called in to the little room. The first thing that struck me was how much like a dentist's surgery it was. It was spotless for a start, and had a reclining chair like the dentist has.

'I'm Mick,' the piercer said. 'Which one wants to get it out of the way first?'

'Me!' I said.

He had me take off my shirt and sit on the chair. He took a pen, and after judging where would be a good place to pierce, marked two dots either side of the nipple.

'Now comes the fun part,' he said. 'Lie back.'

As I lay back I felt the chair recline. He explained everything he was doing, the equipment he was using, and I saw him change his gloves several times as well. If I was going to die of pain then at least it would be hygienically.

'On the count of three...' he said.

'FUUUUUUUUUUCK!' I shouted out. 'Fuck!' And then I heard a click. Chris had just taken a picture on his phone. 'Fuck! That hurt!'

'Oh yeah, I meant to tell you it might,' the piercer deadpanned before a smile crept across his face.

And then the process was repeated.

'Jeee-sus!!' It was even worse than the first one!

After the rings had been inserted and the area cleaned, he put some pads over the nipples and taped them down. Then it was Chris's turn. While he had been only too happy to watch and laugh at my expense, he now looked more than a bit tense as he sat on the chair. The piercer went through the same procedure as he had done with me, marking the two points and then making the seat recline.

If Chris had taken a picture of me then it seemed only fair to take a picture of him. Or maybe better, a video.

'Aaaaaaaaaaargh!' Chris shouted out. 'Fucking hell!' He looked at me with shock, almost as if I'd been playing up for some sympathy when I'd been crying out in pain.

'What did you expect?' I asked, chuckling.


Then the next one.

'Jesus CHRIST! Shit!' He was shaking his head in disbelief. 'Fuck!'

Soon he was padded up, and before we left we were given an aftercare pack and instructions on how to treat them. The bad news was that we'd have to leave them alone for a while, no funny business, but I guessed we could live with that.

As soon as his shirt was on Chris said, 'I need a smoke!'

Outside, he said, 'You were fucking right. Pain for a present isn't the best idea. Next time I do something like that, shoot me.'

'Gladly,' I replied.

We walked aimlessly for a bit, Chris taking deep drags on his cigarette. Eventually we found ourselves at the Wells Centre. 'Come on,' I said, 'maybe we can find something in the sales.'

For an hour or so we wandered around the shops, although we found more enjoyment making fun of the other shoppers than from choosing anything in the shops. We went up to the food court and waited in the queue at Burger King. After eventually being given our order (why is it called 'fast food'?!) we went and sat down.

'How do yours feel?' I asked in between mouthfuls of burger.

'Actually, not bad. That was THE most intense pain I've ever felt, but it was very short. I can hardly feel a thing now. You?'

'Yeah, same here.'

When we got home, the first thing my dad said was, 'Come on, lift up your shirts, let's see the damage.'

I told him that they were all padded up and had to stay that way for a whole day. But then Chris whipped out his phone. I'd completely forgotten he'd taken a picture.

'Here,' he said, passing my dad the phone.

'Oh!' my dad said, his face screwing up. 'That looks sore.' Then he swiped to the next picture. 'Oh!!' he said again, before looking at me in sympathy.

I then took out my phone. 'Aaaaaargh! Fucking hell!' the tinny voice said from the speaker. My dad shook his head in wonder. 'Jesus Christ! Shit!' My dad handed me the phone. 'I can't take any more!... But make sure to show that to your mum!' he said with a wink.

'Show me what?' my mum asked as she came down the stairs.

'Oh!' she said, when she watched the video. 'The things you'll do for fun!'

'I'd hardly call it fun,' Chris said. 'It was ... SORE!'

My mum shook her head and smiled. 'Are you staying again tonight?' she asked Chris.

'Oh, I don't know.'

'You're more than welcome.'

'I'll ask my mum,' he said, before disappearing to the hall to make the call.

My mum looked at me, then down to my nipples, then shook her head. 'My little Greg, getting his nipples pierced. What next? Start a rock band?'

'You've heard the lad sing in the shower, I don't think that's on the horizon,' my dad chuckled.

'My mum says if it's not a problem, then I can stay.'

'Of course it's not a problem!' my mum replied. 'We're happy to have you here.'

'Thanks!' he grinned.

'And what? Don't I get a say in this?' I asked. 'Maybe I don't want you to stay tonight!'

Chris nodded his head. 'Yeah right!'

I smiled. 'Come on, let's go upstairs and play some X-box.'


The next morning after breakfast we went to shower. Going into the bathroom, I said, 'You ready to have a look?' I asked.

'Yeah, I've been forcing myself not to take off the pads.'

We both stripped to our boxers, then I slowly peeled off the tape holding my pads in place and they came away. There was some blood on them, but not too much. I looked down and saw my newly pierced nipples, the rings sticking out, and a little crusty. I looked at myself in the mirror. Wow. There were rings in my chest! 'Your turn,' I said.

Chris took off his and we just stood there, looking at each other, smiles crossing our faces.

There was a knock on the bathroom door. 'So?' my dad asked.

I opened the door. 'Oh!' he said. 'They look a wee bit sore.'

'Actually, they're not,' I replied. And they weren't. I couldn't say what they felt, but they didn't feel sore.

He looked at Chris's, and he looked at mine again. 'Are the rings supposed to stick out like that?'

'The piercer said they'll go down after a few days.'

'Mm-hm, I see. Well...' He looked at them again and nodded. 'Er... I'll let you get back to... er...' and he left.

'Shit!' Chris said.


'I was just starting to get a hard on when you let him in!' I then noticed he was holding his t-shirt in front of his crotch. 'It's gone now.'



On Thursday, New Year's Eve, I texted Chris to ask what I should wear to the gay club.

'Not a clue!' was his response.

Since my boyfriend was hopeless I decided I'd just wear jeans and a shirt - nothing too tight. I imagined it would get pretty hot inside, and I didn't want to wear something that would get sweaty and stick to me. At 8 I went over to Chris's house, and from there we took the bus into town - or at least as far as it would take us. The centre had been closed off for the Hogmanay celebrations, which included some funfair rides, so we had to walk a little bit.

Finally we reached Garlands.

'Looks pretty ordinary,' I said. 'I thought there'd be rainbow flags and pink triangles everywhere. It could be any old club.'

'Yeah,' Chris agreed. 'Looks a bit dingy, actually. Hope it's nicer inside.'

Waiting outside there was a short queue of about 10 people waiting to get in, all clutching yellow invitations. They were a mixed bunch - some who you had absolutely no doubt about their sexual orientation to others who seemed quite macho. And me and Chris.

When we reached the front of the queue, the doorman said, 'You boys realise this is a gay establishment?'

Chris said, 'Bananaman.'

'That's the password?' I asked laughing.

He nodded. The bouncer grinned. 'Alright lads, in you go. Have fun.'

Inside there was a smallish foyer, completely painted black. There was a sort of cloakroom to the right, where we both handed in our jackets to the first drag queen I'd ever seen in the flesh, and ahead there were black double doors from where we could hear the music pumping out.

Reaching for my hand, Chris took a deep breath and said, 'Come on, let's see what it's like.'

We pushed through the double doors and the first thing that hit us was the noise.

'FUCK IT'S LOUD!' Chris shouted to me.


As one track finished another began, this time a remix of a Justin Timberlake song. We both took a few steps in and surveyed the room. We were definitely the youngest there by a good few years although I didn't think we looked out of place. We also seemed to be dressed appropriately, although given what some people were wearing - or not wearing! - anything would be appropriate here. Chris pointed out an impossibly tall drag queen who looked like she'd borrowed style tips from Lady Gaga.

Just then a voice came from behind us. 'Alright boys? New here?' I turned around, then looked up. Another huge drag queen. Where did they grow them?!

'Er.. yeah,' managed to blurt out.

'I thought so,' she said. She had the strangest voice. Very feminine, but very... deep, and with a slight southern American drawl. 'My name's Mirabella and if you need anything, just anything, you be sure to look me out. I'm the biggest bitch here. The bar's over there,' she said, pointing to the far end of the room. 'Ask the barman for a Mirabella's Surprise.' She batted her eyelids and seemingly glided away.

Chris looked at me and just laughed. We made our way to the bar and Chris said to the barman, 'Bananaman would like 2 Mirabella's Surprises.' This to me sounded like the funniest thing ever, but the barman took the order without a trace of humour registering on his face.

'Do you have to say Bananaman all the time?' I asked.

'No, just this once. Jack's cousin said we could get a free drink.'

'Any idea what the fuck a Mirabella's Surprise is?' Just then the barman brought 2 shot glasses over. 'What's in these?' I asked.

'Half a shot of peach schnapps and half a shot of Bailey's. It's real name is a Clit Lickin' Cowgirl, which is what old Mirabella is.'

'She works here?'

'Yeah, she keeps the crowd going. She'll be doing her routine in a bit. Knock 'em back,' he said, looking at the shots.

We both picked them up, clinked the glasses together, then threw them down the hatch.

'Blergh!' Chris said, once the drink had gone down. 'I'm strictly a dick man. No more clits for me.'

'Come on,' I said, 'let's dance.'

Beyonce segued into Kylie, then some mindless boom-boom-boom track made way for Madonna. After the Hung Up remix, Chris said he was going out for a smoke and asked me to join him.

'Nah, I'll stay here,' I said.

'You'll be ok?'

'I think so.'

No sooner had he gone than someone squeezed by bum. Startled, I turned around. It was a man of about my dad's age. 'You here alone?'

'No, with my boyfriend. Sorry.'

'Don't be sorry. He could watch.'

'Nah, you're alright, thanks.' Jesus! I turned my back and headed for the bar.

Sitting at the bar, waiting to order another drink, someone else squeezed my bum. What was it with this place? I turned around but there was nobody there. I ordered 2 bottles of beer and waited for Chris to come back. After a few minutes I felt someone kiss my neck. Thank God! I was getting a bit restless on my own. I turned around to kiss Chris and saw it was some stranger with lots of lipstick and eyeliner, but otherwise dressed 'normally'.

'What the fuck?' I said, angrily.

He batted his eyelashes and pouted his lips. 'Not even a blowjob?'

I was lost for words. This place was so different to the straight clubs I'd been to.

'Eh... NO!' I said authoritatively.

He batted his eyelashes again and ran his tongue around his lips before flouncing off. Just then I saw Chris coming back. He was looking just as flustered as I was.

'Thank God you're back!' I said relieved.

'What do you mean?'

'In the ten minutes you've been gone, a bloke old enough to be my dad squeezed my bum and said that you could watch us fuck. Someone else squeezed my bum, no idea who, and some guy with lipstick kissed my neck and offered me a blowjob.'

'That's nothing. A couple offered me a line of Charlie if I'd fuck one in the arse while the other one fucked his mouth. I said no, so they offered 2 lines!'



I handed him his drink. 'Here, I've been holding onto this for dear life, just in case someone tried to spike it.'

'Thanks,' he said, taking a swig.

After finishing our beers we went back to dance. It's funny, in that old Madonna song there's the line, 'Only when I'm dancing can I feel this free'. That's what it felt like for me, dancing with Chris. We were out in public, dancing together, giving each other small kisses, and nobody batted an eyelid. Aside from the unwanted attention to my rear, this was fun.

After a few songs, Mirabella came back up to us. 'I believe one of you boys is Bananaman. SuperTed would like to meet you.'

'SuperTed?' Chris asked, bewildered.

Mirabella laughed. 'The owner.'

We followed Mirabella through the dancing throng back to the entrance and then through another door I hadn't noticed. Upstairs there was one door with MANAGER written on it.

'Oh SuperTed,' she called out, 'your Bananaman is here.'

She ushered us inside, and waiting for us was Jack's cousin - a tall, friendly looking man. He looked to be about 30ish and was wearing a tailored suit, a dark shirt, unbuttoned at the top, and he had a 5 o'clock shadow. I wondered if Jack was as good looking.

'Hi, I'm Kenny,' he said, extending his hand.

'I'm Chris, and this is Greg.'

'So, what do you think of the place?' he asked, showing us to the couch, while he sat on the edge of his desk.

'Er... It's a bit different to straight clubs,' I said, trying to be diplomatic.

'What do you mean?'

'Well, I've had 2 strangers squeeze my bum and one kiss my neck and offer me a blowjob.'

'Oh!' he said, with a smile. 'And girls don't do that in straight clubs?'

'No!' I said, smiling back. 'And I can only imagine what they'd do if someone tried to pinch their bum!' He laughed. 'And Chris had 2 guys offer him coke if he'd fuck one of them.'

'Oh!' he repeated. He moved his head from side to side. 'Yeah. We are a bit different. Didn't know about the drugs though. We try to keep them out. It's hard though.'

'Yeah, I can imagine,' Chris said.

'This place is a little less... hardcore than some other clubs. We get more of a mixed crowd, plus we've got the stage were Mirabella does her act, and we put on a few other shows from time to time. Mr Garlands 2010 is coming up next month if you want to come along. If you enter you just might win. Either of you!' he said winking. 'What do you think of Mirabella?' he grinned.

'Ha ha. She's great. How tall is she?' I asked.

'Without heels she's 6'5'. With heels... Tonight she's 6'9', but she has been taller.'

'Wow! My mum's only 5'5'!'

'Have you seen Acacia Road?'

'Where?' Chris asked.

'It's the back room. Probably where those 2 guys wanted to take you.' As he led us downstairs, he warned us it wasn't for the faint of heart and explained that it was basically a big room with an assortment of furniture for guys to... well, be guys on. We pushed our way through the crowd on the dance floor to the opposite end of the room from the bar. Above a door was the sign, '29 Acacia Road'.

'Why that name?' I asked.

'God, kids today, you've no idea, do you? Bananaman and SuperTed were the best cartoons on TV when I was a kid. 29 Acacia Road was where Bananaman lived.'

'Oh, I thought Bananaman was...' Chris let his voice trail off, a little embarrassed.

Kenny laughed. 'No! Something much more innocent, I'm afraid.'

He opened the door and we were led into a small corridor, and at the end there was another door. Through that we found ourselves in a very dark room. It took a while for my eyes to adjust, but it seemed to be almost as big as the club area next door, and around the room ... wow, around the room there were guys fucking.

'Jesus!' Chris said.

'Yeah!' I replied. There was a strange odour in the air. 'What's that smell?'

'Ah, that'll be the poppers. Or room fresheners as they're technically known.'

Chris and I both looked around in amazement. I'd heard of this kind of thing but never thought I'd see it.

'Holy shit!' Chris exclaimed, before turning his back to the room.

'What is it?'

'Look at the guy over my left shoulder. The spit roast.'

I looked around and could just make out who Chris was talking about, a middle aged guy, naked as the day he was born, on his hands and knees, being fucked from behind by a big hairy guy while he was being face fucked by a skinny older guy. I looked a bit harder. 'Holy shit!'

'What is it?' Kenny asked.

'That's Mr Thomson, one of our history teachers. I thought he was married,' I said to Chris.

'I'm SURE he is!'

Kenny laughed. 'We get all types in here. Gay, straight, bi, bi-curious, lonely, randy, and some just drunk enough to try it once.'

'Let's get out, I've seen enough,' I said.

'Yeah, me too.'

As we were going through the small room back to the dancefloor, Kenny apologised. 'I'm sorry, I hope that wasn't too much for you.'

'No, no, it's not that. It WAS a bit of an eye opener, though,' Chris said.

'Oh yeah, it was. Not sure what to do about Mr Thomson, though.'

'Probably best to do nothing,' Kenny said. 'You've no idea why he's here, or if his wife knows. And is it really anybody's business?'

I thought about it. 'No, I suppose not.'

Before we exited into the club, Kenny said, 'Listen guys, you're welcome here any time. Just use the password and you'll get in no problem. Maybe stay away from that room, though.'

'Yeah,' we agreed.

'And if anyone offers you any kind of drug, don't take it. You've no idea what they might've cut it with.'

'Ok,' I said. I'd no intention of taking drugs anyway, but it was good of him to tell us.

'Happy New Year when it comes, boys.'

'Thanks, Kenny.'

And then we were back, with another Beyonce hit blasting out. We went back to the bar and Chris got us more beer.

'Fuck! Mr Thomson!' Chris said, getting onto a barstool.

'I know!! It didn't look like it was his first time.'

Chris laughed. 'No, it didn't. I wonder if his wife knows?'

'Well... Maybe she does. It's Hogmanay, after all. Surely he'd normally be spending it with her.'

'Yeah. And like Kenny said, it's none of our business.'

Our beers came, and along with them 2 shots of vodka. 'On the house,' the barman said.

'Thanks!' We knocked back the vodka and as I started on my beer, Chris got up and came behind me. He put his arm around my waist and pulled himself close to me. I laid my head back on his chest and just soaked up the experience. It was one thing for us to be together at home, but it was completely something else to be affectionate out in public. I rubbed the back of my head against his chest then turned my head for him to kiss me.

After a few minutes I could feel the alcohol begin to take effect. I never drank very much and it didn't take a lot for me to get drunk. I also felt I needed to pee. 'Could you come with?' I asked. 'You know... for protection?' Chris smiled. We finished our beers and headed off for the toilets.

The toilets were pretty much what I had imagined. That's to say there was a long urinal against one wall, and 3 toilet cubicles, 2 without doors. Chris and I both went to the urinals, where there was already a really skinny guy in really tight clothes standing. As I unzipped and took out my dick, he looked down and said, 'Need a hand with that?'

'No, it's ok, thanks, I'm doing fine.' I couldn't get over how forward people were in this place.

'How about you, sunshine?' he asked Chris.

'No, I think I'll manage.' I felt Chris tap my elbow with his, trying to get my attention. I slowly turned my head to look at him and saw a huge grin on his face.

Just then we heard someone obviously cumming. There were 2 short grunts, followed by, 'Oh yeah, take it slut! Take it you bitch! Drink that cum for me.' Chris and I quickly looked at each other before turning to look in the direction of the toilets. The cubicle with the door was closed, while in the middle one there was a guy sitting on the toilet giving someone a blow job through a glory hole. 'Don't you waste a fucking drop or I'll skelp your wee arse,' came the mystery voice.

The guy giving the blowjob most certainly didn't have a wee arse. His tight shirt showed off some serious pecs and his neck was as thick as my thighs.

Chris and I zipped up and looked at each other, not quite believing what was going on. It's one thing to see that on a video on the internet, it's another to have it happen 2 metres away from you. Just then the toilet door unlocked, and out walked this wee, skinny, runt of a man. Chris double-tapped my elbow with his, as if to say, 'Look at that!'

'That was smashin'!' the little guy said. The big guy put his arm around the small guy's neck and they walked out into the club.

Chris and I both cracked up. 'Did you see that?!' I said.

'That was smashin'!' I mimicked.

'I could show you smashing,' the skinny guy next to me said. I'd forgotten he was even there.

'No, really, you're alright.'

As we walked back into the club I asked Chris was time it was. We had 30 minutes until the New Year started so we decided to get another shot of vodka and dance in the new year. About 10 minutes before midnight Mirabella took to the stage. She did a hilarious version of Dancing Queen, with the lyrics reworked, chatted with the crowd, telling a few jokes, then it was the countdown to midnight.

'10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...'

Then the whole place shouted Happy New Year as glitter and shiny paper fell like snow from the ceiling. Chris's arms were around me in an instant and my mouth was being invaded by his tongue. Oh God, it was certainly going to be a happy new year. As our kiss continued, Abba's Thank You For The Music stared blaring out, and soon our bodies were swaying in time to the music.

As Chris broke off the kiss, I said, 'I wonder what Mr Thomson had in his mouth?' He laughed.

Following the Abba song there was Madonna's Crazy For You. Chris slipped his hands around my waist while I put them around his neck, and we swayed in time to the music, giving each other small kisses from time to time.

When the song finished we headed back to the bar for another beer and another shot of vodka. Suddenly I let out a loud burp. 'Oh! Sorry about that!' Chris laughed, waving his hand in front of his face trying to dispel the smell.

'What time do you think we should leave?' he asked.

I reached for his crotch and gave it a quick squeeze. 'Whenever you like.'

He put his half-drunk bottle on the bar and said, 'Let's go.' He took my hand and led me through the crowd. When we got to the door he stopped and gave me a big, long kiss. 'Last chance to do that in public for a while,' he said with a smile.

We got our jackets and headed off out into the night in search of a taxi. Chris's mum was staying with Jack for 2 nights so we had the place to ourselves. And we didn't intend to let it go to waste.



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