A Long, Hard Life

So put up your fists, and I'll put up mine
No runnin' away from the scene of the crime
God's chosen a place
Somewhere near the end of the world
Somewhere near the end of our lives
But 'till then no, Daddy, don't be surprised
If I want to see the tears in your eyes
Then I know it had to be long ago
Actually
In the driftin' white snow
You loved me
No matter how strong
I'm gonna take you down
With one little stone
I'm gonna break you down
And see what you're worth
What you're really worth to me

– "Dinner at Eight" by Rufus Wainwright

***

"Parents kill more dreams than anybody."

– Spike Lee

PREVIOUSLY

I found the door to the office and saw light under the door. I peeked inside only to have someone grab me roughly and pull me in. I stumbled a few steps, stopping at the foot of an oak desk. Seated behind it was a familiar figure.

He looked like Anton if he had put on 30 years, 20 pounds of additional muscle, and dyed his hair coppery red. He parted his hair on the right and combed it back from a patrician brow. He kept his beard immaculately trimmed. The fit of his black suit and the stone in his wedding band indicated a great deal of wealth. He sat back in a high back leather desk chair holding a cup and saucer of tea.

The deep lines in his face told me this man rarely smiled. His eyes were the same vivid blue in color as Anton's. Unlike my lover, this man's eyes were as cold as the heart of a wintery mountain. I saw no life in those eyes. They opened into a hungry, bottomless void. I tore my gaze away and rubbed my arms against the chill of my reception.

"Ah, Chonay, how good of you to join us. Please, have a seat." The stranger's smile did not reach his eyes as he gestured to a nearby chair. He set his cup of tea on the desk blotter and laced his fingers in his lap.

"My name is Owain, Count Owain Spencer. It is such a pleasure to finally meet you. We have so much to discuss."

NOW
(Before Dude Ranch)

Count Owain Spencer, father of the men I loved. I knew very little about him save that his family greatly feared him. I feared my ignorance might cost me now.

I should have followed my first impulse and insisted on meeting every member of the family. Now Owain probably thought I joined his wife and sons in whatever family drama they were mixed up in. That might have been so but I preferred to make that decision for myself. I needed more information. I took a quick survey of my surroundings

The office was rectangular and spacious with handsome wood paneling and thick shag carpeting. The oak desk sat at the end of the room with Owain enthroned between two ficus plants and a generic office painting hanging centrally at his rear. A window wall at my left showed a panoramic view of the Tokyo skyline at night. To my right and within arms reach stood one of the Danish Royal Guard. He crossed his arms and appeared to be listening casually to our conversation. One more leaned back against the door and directly across from him a third sat in a plush reading chair in a corner library, flipping through magazines.

I saw only two ways out, one guarded by two surly goons and the other led to certain death after a messy fall. I knew a few self defense throws but I knew better than to test the skills of Denmark's elite military force. It became abundantly clear that I needed more than brute force if I wanted to leave.

I slowly took a seat and offered a smile I did not feel. I hoped the tips on courtly etiquette I picked up in my years of tabletop gaming did not lead me to making a fool of myself.

"Count Owain, Your Excellency, this is a surprise! I was informed that I was to meet your sons."

The Count waved off my concern. "That, a necessary deception. I wanted to meet you in private before meeting with my heir. I can only imagine the wild tales he told you about me."

"I haven't heard anything, actually." That was true. Freja, not her sons, warned me that Owain was a cruel man. "Oh, wait, Anton mentioned that you were a power broker. I assumed it had something to do with banking. He said you were a wealthy and powerful man."

Owain scoffed, "wealth and power are relative terms. To you, yes, I am a wealthy and powerful man. That is what is important to you, isn't it?"

"I'm not sure I follow."

"If course you do." He tutted. "I've studied a great deal about you, Chonay. You were born to poverty, the child of a white, long haul trucker and a half-breed Indigenous woman. You excelled in your studies despite your hardship, graduating high school in the top of your class. You went on to study art at the prestigious Fort Lauderdale Art Institute. You spent a year in Paris as an exchange student. There you made many connections and launched your first gallery showing. You switched to a double major, graduating with degrees in Fine Art as well as Graphic Art and Advertising Design. Since then you have launched three online businesses selling original art. 

You continue to appear at galleries across the United States whilst building a reputation as an advocate for sexual minorities. You've made quite a name for yourself, I'm impressed by your tenacity and initiative."

I had to give it to Owain, he knew how to pour on the charm while intimidating me. I considered that he might be on the level. He seemed polite so far, might I be borrowing trouble blindly trusting Freja's word? Every bone in my body told me that Owain was bad news. I needed to get out of here, now.

Anton and Emil were gone. I had no idea where they were or if they were okay. They would never have let me come here alone. A Royal Guardsman lied to me and led me here. Another guardsman roughly yanked me into this office and now leaned against the door, blocking the only way out. Count Owain recited my life story in disturbing detail, making it plain that he had been watching me. I looked at the window as an increasingly attractive escape option. I hoped I was being paranoid, that Owain was on the level. I kept him talking, looking for answers, for a way out of this.

A lifetime of facing abuse equipped me with what I needed now. I schooled my expression to amiable ignorance. "Thank you, sir, I appreciate that a busy man like you took time to do your homework. I feel bad now because I wanted so much to meet you. Perhaps you could tell me more about yourself?"

"Perhaps another time," Owain deflected. "I've come a long way and I have much yet to do while I'm here. I trust that we can settle business quickly. Tea?" He offered.

"Thank you, no."

"Are you certain? It's quite good. Earl Grey, I believe you take it black and sweet?"

Oh Creator, I thought to myself, he has been to the coffee house where I worked. He knows my friends, my family!

I grew cold inside but my smile never wavered. "You're really very good at that! Now I have to do my homework. I should know at least as much about you, it's only polite."

"Indeed," the corner of the Count's lips twitched with what might have been genuine amusement. "You might be too busy to bother with me, I'll understand. After all, I have a veritable army of people working to satisfy my every whim. The perks of privilege and all that. Let us get to the point of this visit."

The Count clasped his hands together on the desk. "I expect you know a bit about this already so I'll be brief. As a son of royal blood my heir, Anton, has certain family obligations. He has chosen to shirk his responsibilities. I permitted this to a point as the indiscretions of youth. The time has come for him to grow up and you will help me convince him."

"Me?" This sincerely threw me off guard.

"Yes," Owain got to his feet and leaned against the desk. He loomed over me as he revealed his plan.

"I know about the contract." He began. "My wife encourages Anton's willfulness. Whatever her scheme it is clear you are at the center of it. You seek access to wealth and power. I am prepared to give you ten million dollars in U.S. currency. All you have to do is walk away. Go home a rich man and consider yourself wiser for the experience."

The offer took me aback. I already stood to gain a lump sum of five million and one million per year as a lifetime sponsorship if I chose to walk away from the contract. The Count's offer tripled my potential windfall.

I looked Owain in the eye. "What's the catch?"

The Count raised a speculative eyebrow. "The catch is exactly as I stated, walk away–leave all of this behind. You are to have nothing to do with me or my family from this moment forward. My men will see you safely home."

He gave me a shark's smile. "Come now, isn't this better? You can devote your full attention to art and have your pick of handsome young men without any messy entanglements."

One of the guardsmen set a briefcase on the desk and popped it open. I saw stacks of hundred dollar bills packed to the brim.

"Father!" Anton and Emil shoved into the office with Mattias and Zeke fast on their heels. They looked like they had just stepped out of a barroom brawl. Owain smiled at their arrival.

"Son, you're just in time. We were just concluding our business."

Anton turned his attention to me and for the first time he saw the briefcase full of money. The look of surprise and hurt on his face tore at my soul. Emil kept his cool but I knew his heart.

"Chonay?" Anton fell back a step. I looked away.

I touched the lid on the briefcase and stared at the money. This box of paper opened the door to all of my dreams. It guaranteed my independence. I called the shots. I determined my own destiny. No more family drama. No more uncertainty or anxiety. It was a nice dream. I rubbed the fancy leather of the lid before I closed it. All I had to do was take the money and walk out.

"Would I have ever made it home?" I fixed Owain with a level look. His brow tensed, I had hit a nerve. I turned and faced him.

"Why waste so much money on me? I'm nobody, you know that already." Suddenly the pieces fell in place.

"You need to separate me from your son. It looks convincing when I take the money and leave. You have witnesses and an alibi. As far as anyone knows I disappeared to the Caribbean never to to be seen or heard from again. Nobody knows I'm at the bottom of the Pacific chained to a block of cement."

Owain huffed but he pointedly averted his gaze. "You have a vivid imagination. As I feared, my son filled your head with wild tales about me."

"I hope so, I don't want to believe you are capable of something so horrible." I pushed the briefcase away and walked slowly and carefully to stand between Anton and Emil. I took their hands and they stepped closer, closing ranks protectively. The tension in the air was electric without anyone making a move.

"I want to be wrong about you." I picked up, "I want to think that you love your sons." I stressed that last word since Owain seemed intent on ignoring his youngest child.

"I want to think that you'd support your sons' happiness no matter who they chose to love. I want to think that you could come together as a family. There is still time but it's up to you."

The Count looked at how I held hands with his sons for a long, silent moment before nodding to his men. "We're done here."

They made their exit with Mattias holding back the guardsman that led me into the trap. He spoke with steel in his voice. "Pack your things and get out. Your time in the Guard is done."

The turncoat shrugged, "that's fine by me. The Count pays better."

The room cleared and my lovers came alive looking me over. "Did he hurt you?" Emil asked.

"No, but he implied a lot. Wait, you ask me when you're hurt?" I freaked out at the sight of their cuts and bruises. "We need to get you to a hospital!"

Anton shook off that idea. "It's nothing severe, we don't need the press getting wind that something's up."

"Fuck the Press!" I roared. "Wait, what happened, where did you go?"

Mattias explained, "I alerted them to a call from home. They chose to let you sleep. We didn't know anything was amiss until Zeke found us."

"Zeke?" I turned to face him with a look of surprise. He flushed bashfully at the attention, then preened, cocksure with a big grin. "I was sleeping, right? Then I hear all of this commotion, so I peek my head out. Sometimes you gents get up to something spicy, so I sneak a peek. Anyway, it was some suit leading you out. I didn't like the look of the guy so I followed you. I catch the princes coming back and tell them what I see. Then half the suits turn on us!"

"Apparently, the Count has been placing his men in Emil's guard squad for some time. They've been following our every move for months."

I began shaking as the danger sank in. "Your mom said your father was a cruel man. None of you told me he was psycho! He knows everything about me! He knows about my friends at work, my family–shit, are they in danger because of me?"

"We've been keeping a careful eye on your loved ones. It's standard procedure when a family has regular contact with those in the royal circle." Mattias reassured me but I snapped back.

"Like you protected me tonight? I'm not impressed!"

Anton grasped me gently by the shoulders. "Chonay, you're right. All we can do is deal with it."

"Why didn't you tell me!" I gritted past furious tears.

"Who wants to think that about their father, Chonay?" Emil hung his head mournfully. "We didn't want to scare you. We made a mistake, I'm sorry."

Anton gripped his hair and heaved a mighty sigh of frustration. He calmed down before looking me in the eye. "I hoped to keep father away from you. I see now that was a mistake. I'm sorry."

I felt lost and cold and alone and pissed. I turned in aimless circles before I stepped close to Anton. I tugged Emil close like a child's rag doll. "Hold me," I asked in a small voice. "I can't stand being angry with you."

They clutched me tight while Mattias looked on. I reached for my boy next. "You too, I might be dead if not for you. Thank you, Zeke. By the way, I wouldn't blame you if you wanted out."

"What, quit over this little dust-up? Mate, there are guys on the beach who will gut ya like a fish for looking at 'em funny. There is danger everywhere, the trick is to pick the danger you can live with. Here, I've got backup I can trust and they're footing my bar tab. I can't ask for better."

I kissed him, enjoying as the sweet rake fed me tongue.

***

We could not sleep in the hotel knowing that Owain and his goons might be a floor away. Mattias arranged for us to stay in a safe house retained by the Danish embassy. Owain could have been anywhere but that kind of thinking only made things worse. The festive mood of our trip was gone, though. We still had two months left in the contract.

"Isn't the contract useless now? Father came after us." Emil leaned back in a kitchen chair while the rest of us considered our options.

"I don't think so," I sat on the couch propped on an elbow. "He knew about the contract. He knew I was an important part of it, but he didn't offer more. He would have lorded it over me had he known the details."

"He would have come straight for me. The contract is still protecting us." Anton lay on the couch with his head in my lap. He thumbed through an old travel magazine while we talked.

"We need to lay low in a place where father can't sneak up on us." He pondered.

Emil blew an exasperated breath as he set his chair down with a clunk. "That rules out just about every place in civilization!"

"Exactly," Anton handed over the magazine and tapped the page. I looked at it.

"A dude ranch?" I raised a quizzical eyebrow.

"It's remote and access is restricted." He smiled at his cleverness.

"What is a dude ranch?" Emil sat forward, curious.

I replied. "It's a ranch that is open for vacations. Think of it as a fancy camping trip. They offer horseback riding, hiking, swimming, fishing, just about everything you can think of to do outdoors. It's right down your alley."

Emil laced his fingers behind his head. "I haven't fucked you in a tent yet."

I snorted, "you have a one track mind, lover-boy."

"You love my one-track mind, admit it."

"I'm not looking at your mind, sweetheart." I winked.

Anton checked something. "This is an old magazine. This place might not be open anymore."

"There is only one way to find out." Zeke entered from the bathroom, clearly listening to the conversation.

"Are we in agreement about this place?" We collectively gave our assent and Anton pulled out his phone. Soon we were headed for Tommy's Dude Ranch.

---

Author Note: I write in a fantasy world where sexually transmitted diseases do not exist but in the real world, PrEP before you play and glove it before you love it. Carry on gentlemen!

* Note: this concludes the lead up to Tommy's Dude Ranch. Chapter 15 will pick up with the aftermath of the ranch visit. Will Chonay say "yes" to Anton and Emil's marriage proposal? Stay tuned and find out!