The Book of the Blue House

But to Cal and Gabriel the baths were nice, and knowing that Sara was returning and they had all come back alive was the best thing of all. Derek and Conn had been staying in Cal’s room all this time, and they watched Cal and Gabriel strip with little care, and saw their backs thinner, their shoulders a little sharper, their buttocks smaller as they trumped into the washing rooms. They would take the tubs and probably do the full ritual, and Conn imagined that the full ritual would have been much needed after having been gone a year.

After they had bathed and dressed, Conn and Derek, Nialla and the rest of them, did not see Cal and Gabriel for the rest of the day. They went to the Abbot and stayed with him, even during dinner when everyone feasted the returned Blue Priests and, to the great surprise of Conn and even Derek, when they did return they returned wearing the clothes of some of the younger priests, the sheer, transparent hoses that revealed genitals and buttocks and showed that what Cal and Gabriel had lost in fat and roundness they had gained in muscle, and the voluminous sleeved tunics that were famous in the south. Cal went to work in the Blue Rooms, and Gabriel, who had generally been a scholar, began to attend the sanctuary with Conn three mornings every week. During the initiation ritual, the rooms were completely darkened, but on most days they were in semi darkness, and when the act was over, the priest and the supplicant came out into the pool where the sunlight shone, and bathed. Gabriel and Conn obviously did not go into the same rooms, but there was a unity in knowing they were traveling to do the same thing. The procedure for going to the rooms was walking and not taking the lift, so there were long conversations between the two of them as they made their way to sanctuary.

It was not many days before Sara and Theo, dusty, but not the worse for wear, returned. Sara had sent a letter ahead of her, but it had not yet come to Nialla.

“We need a proper bath and that’s a fact,” Theo announced.

Their parents had been in the south, so they had seen them. It was their cousins who would be by the river and whom they needed to visit and they would do so.

“But not today,” Sara said. “I’m dead on my feet, and we’ve been traveling up the Southern Road with one horse and a lot of us just walking, non stop.”

They could have returned in one of the army caravans, but having stopped to visit their family, they traveled by this much longer way. The return of Sara was a cause of great joy for Obala who said all of her food tasted of tears since they had gone after Cal and Gabriel.

“Isn’t it great,” Matteo said, earnestly, “that all of us are together again?”

That night Lorne was there and so were Brian, Quinton and Matteo. Derek and Cal sang old songs. Obala brought bread and chicken and Conn sat beside his sister, feeling full of the old warmth those rooms had known, Occasionally Jon glanced at him, but this night Conn’s eyes were on Gabriel in the white hose with the strong thighs who, when he rose, the very round shape of his behind was visible, and when he laughed, the joy in him was more visible still. Derek had the duty of night prayers, as did Quinton, and when Matt prepared to leave with them, Conn said, “Where are you going?”

Matteo gestured to him and they went into the kitchen.

“You have been talking about Gabriel since he left,” Matteo said. “And now he’s here and Quinton has told me how much he thinks of you, and the two of you have never had time together. Well, tonight is your time.”

“Matt!” Conn started.

His best friend, his always love, laid a strong hand on his shoulder and looked at him almost severely.

“Tonight,” he told Conn, “is your time.”

He would never be used to this way of life, where being in love with one man did not mean you wouldn’t be in love with another, where the lover you had given your heart to, encouraged you to go to another lover. Oh, sure, all over there were those who played around, the man who strayed, the woman or man who looked the other way because it meant nothing. But Derek meant everything to him, and knew how much Matteo had meant. And Matteo knew how much he meant to Conn and also knew how much Gabriel would mean, and yet he said, “Tonight is your time.”

The same way Quinton had gently placed his hand in Matteo’s and gently kissed him a year ago, in Gabriel’s presence now Matteo placed his hands on Conn’s shoulder’s kissed him, and then turned to leave.

When they were all on their way to bed, Gabriel said, “I guess I should go, too. I am staying upstairs tonight.”

But he did not stay in Derek’s room, He passed through it and went out of the hall, and Lorne was stretching out and Cal was on his way to the old large room, still talking to Sara. Conn sat on the sofa a while, and then he stood up and rather than going out the door of Lorne’s room, went down the hall to Derek’s, and left through there to see Gabriel standing at the door of the room beside Derek’s, a room he’d never wondered about before.

“You….” Conn found his mouth dry and started over again. “You never stay in this room. You never stay alone.”

“That’s true,” Gabriel said.

And then I said, “I used to. But then Sara was there so even that wasn’t alone. Not really. There was no privacy.”

“Yes,” Conn said, looking away from the transparent hose that shone on Gabriel’s lovely legs, from the face of the redhead who looked quiet, subdued.

“Then you want to be alone,” Conn said. “In that case, I shouldn’t—”

“Conn,” Gabriel almost shouted.

Conn turned to him.

“Why in the world do you think I took this room? When I said privacy I meant…”

Then Gabriel simply opened the door and said, “Conn, Come in.”

When he came in he almost immediately fell into Gabriel’s arms and Gabriel’s kiss. He was surprised that his mouth tasted of spearmint and that Gabriel seemed almost as nervous and as eager as he did. He was surprised and glad that he could still be nervous. Quickly, more from what seemed nerves than a desire to show off, Gabriel unlaced the mesh hose and pulled them off quickly, fooling with them where they were stuck coming over his feet, and then he took off the tunic, and Conn undressed quickly too.

Conn was unconscious of what he looked like, but stood almost worshipping the lightly muscled body of Gabriel Rokamont and finally, looking into his face, stepping forward to kiss him, wrapping his arms around him while Gabriel’s arms enfolded him in a their surprising strength. They stood kissing and running their hands slowly up and down each other, and then lay on the bed to kiss and touch and know more. With a small smile, Gabriel reached up and turned out the light, and in the darkness of the room with only the blue light of late night coming through the window, he said, “Well, now, that’s better.”