Jordan

That first taste just whetted my appetite even more. Every once in a while I wondered if I was going crazy. But then some small thing would happen. And I'd want more.

I saw him walking home from school. I stopped. Asked him if he wanted a ride. It took two times—the first time he just said thanks and smiled.  Damn.  I loved that smile.  But it was only a short walk for him.

The second time he said okay. I was so happy to have him close to me. I even thanked him for letting me give him a ride. He shook my hand as he got out. Fuck.  Just him touching my hand made me hard. 

And he really seemed to have no idea how much effort I had put into finding that small opening.

A second time he asked how my math class was going. Damn. Was he trying to make me vulnerable? Fuck it. "If you have time some time, maybe you could help me"? "Any time. I'd be happy to.".

And so it happened that he came to my place. I don't think anyone had ever done that before.  I had always been pretty protective of my own space. But there I was, inviting him into my room where I studied.

And there we were. My girl never even came to my room. But there he was, sitting next to me. And then he put his hand on my leg, as he helped me. Even moved it close to my crotch. Damned math. Wonderful math. I moved my hand away, honestly so he could do whatever the hell he wanted. He got closer. But that was it. 

And that went on. Time after time. Night after night. He even rubbed my crotch a couple of time. He had to know I let him. He should have know I wanted him to.  And he'd finish helping me. And leave. Even insisted on walking home:  “so I could just have a nice sleep”. Bitch.  Those nights it was even harder to sleep.  I’d jerk off.  I wished I could jerk my heart off..

I'd bring up sex with my girl with him. He didn't take the bait. At all.  I'd spread my legs apart so he could really grab my crotch if he wanted to. He wouldn't. I'd talk about jerking off in the bathtub. Even about my cum floating in the water. He'd smile. Rub the inside of my leg. I'd talk to him about his dates. Damn. Then I'd get worried and jealous that he might have sex with one of them.

Fuck. I loved having him around. Just breathing the same air as me. Working out with me.  But there was no way I could ever say any of that.

And then I sang in the shower. Joking that it didn't bother me that he wouldn't suck me.

Jordan smiled. Damn I loved it when he smiled. Even more when I knew I had caused the smile.

I sang some more. 

He looked at me: "Really? So what if I actually go down on you? Right here?"

Fuck.

I was worried I was going to pass out if he really did.

And there he was. Kneeling right in front of me. My heart beating so loud I was afraid it might scare him away. He had to hear it. 

He kissed my cock. So tenderly.  Oh my god. Our first kiss. I was excited. And I was terrified. Girls had told my girl that he was a great kisser, even as they lamented that he seemed to lose interest after a single date. But there he was, actually kissing my dickhead. My lips were jealous.

And my damned cock exploded.

Fuck. Right in his mouth. But he was so unfazed. Had he done this before?  Shit.  I hoped not.  I wanted him to be a virgin.  My virgin.

He just kept kissing. His beautiful long tongue licking my cockhead, as the cum just flowed.  And flowed. I put my hand in his hair. Damn. I loved his thick brown hair. I put my other hand in his hand.  He kissed my cock so tenderly. I massaged his head, as he just kept making out with my throbbing cock.

Fuck.  I came a second time.  He still just kept going.  Kissing, licking, swallowing.  Even kissing my balls.

And when he finally got up he just said "Really? You really don't care?" And he grabbed my ass, but just squoze it ever so slightly.

I wanted him. Even more.  How was that possible?  More than I had ever wanted anything.

And I was worried.  I wanted to tell him I loved him.  I wanted to hold him.   Honestly.  Just hold him.  I just wanted him to be with me.  Even spend just a little bit more time with me.

But more than anything I didn’t want him to feel guilty…

That night I couldn’t sleep at all. 

He wouldn’t be mad at me, right?

Damn…