Helping a friend figure things out

After the Party

This is a true story from a journal of mine, back when I was in my twenties. My name is Renz, and I am currently 31 years old and Bi. I have changed/removed names and locations to keep some anonymity for those involved. My journal entries tended to be long, so sorry if it drags.

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This story takes place around 2011, when I was just starting to sleep with a friend of mine who I recently found out had a crush on me. We decided to do a friends-with-benefits thing. His name is Noah, 19 yrs old, 5’6”, olive skin tone, short straight light brown hair, and green eyes. I was 20 yrs old at the time 5’11”, with olive skin, medium-length dark brown hair, and brown eyes. I was born in Italy and at this time still had a noticeable Italian accent.

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So it is Friday night, and I am supposed to be getting ready to go out with my best friend Joel to a party in the woods near his mom’s house. I still hate that this is something I kind of look forward to. When we were in high school I always thought these parties were dumb. Who in their right mind would want to go all the way out in the woods to drink warm beer around a fire? Now, after being away at school for 2 years, these parties are pretty nostalgic. It’s cool to meet up with people who you haven’t seen in a few years and get a little buzzed out in the woods. Plus it is the only thing to really do in town after dark so I will take what I can get at this point.

However, I had other plans going on this Friday night. Earlier this week I hung out with Noah, Joel’s younger brother, and helped him find a whole new side of himself. He drove us out to a lake in the woods in his lifted pickup truck, and we ended up having sex in the bed of his truck.

Before that night, I never thought of Noah as anything other than Joel’s cute 19-year-old brother and a friend of mine. After that night I really couldn’t stop thinking about Noah. I think Noah feels the same way. I mean he already planned the next time we could get together, that has to mean something. He wanted me to stay over at their house after the party and sneak into his room so we could do it again. I was planning on crashing at Joel’s place after this party anyway, and the idea that I might be able to sneak in some quick sex made it a no-brainer. Noah wasn’t going to be at this party because he works a second shift job at some manufacturing plant west of where we live. I have no idea what he does there, but I know he usually gets home around midnight or 1 AM. That means he will definitely be awake whenever Joel and I came back from this party.

As I am getting ready my phone is blowing up with texts. Some of them are from people going to the same party to see if I am going, but most of them are from Noah. He is sending me things like:

“I’ll be seeing you later?”

“You aren’t going to chicken out, right?”

“If you get to my house before me and pass out I am waking your ass up!”

Followed by a picture with a caption, “I know you won’t ignore this one!”

The picture was an over-the-shoulder mirror picture. Half of the frame was Noah’s face, one deep green eye looking right into the camera. Over his shoulder you could see in the bathroom mirror he had pulled his pants down exposing his round pale ass.

I responded “Didn’t anyone ever tell you never send nudes with your face in them? I’m getting ready for the party, what do you want?”

“I am just making sure you aren’t going to leave me hanging later.”

“I’ll be there ;). Aren’t you supposed to be working?”

“8 PM dude, I’m on lunch. What are you doing?”

“Trying to get a shower and get dressed so I can get Joel and we can go out. It’s hard though because SOMEONE keeps texting me.”

“Shower? Maybe we can go pic for pic?”

That made me laugh out loud because Noah was the one asking me to keep this thing on the DL after we had sex the first time. It has been less than a week, and he is asking me to go pic for pic with him while he is at work. I replied to him saying, “Nah, you’ll just have to wait until later.”

“Fine, but don’t go out and get shitfaced and pass out before I get home.”

I didn’t really drink that much anymore, but I couldn’t help but mess with him. I sent him a picture of the joint I had finished rolling as he was texting me. “No, promises LOL”

“Renz, I swear if you are asleep later I’m pouring water on you until you wake up.”

“Relax, I’m just messing with you. You’re not the only one looking forward to this BTW.”

He stopped replying after that so I think he got the answer he was looking for. I think we both are into this setup as fuck buddies, but it’s hard to keep the boundary up between just being physical and getting emotionally involved. I’m the only guy Noah has ever been with. I don’t want to hurt him but we were clear this wasn’t a dating arrangement, hookups only. I just hope we are still on the same page because I would hate to hurt his feelings like that.

I was finally free to take a quick shower and after I got out I thought to myself--What the fuck? Why not give Noah a little sneak peek?--

My closet door had a full-length mirror on it, and before I got dressed I stood in front of it. I posed there with my hand just barely covering my junk. You could slightly see the tip of my cock and some of my shaft. Okay…maybe I did a few push-ups and sit-ups to get a slight pump going. If I am sending out a semi-nude picture I want it to look good. I cropped my head out of the frame, and sent it to Noah with the caption “This is how it’s done btw.”

I got dressed and headed out to meet up with Joel. When I pulled up to his house I got out of my car and got into his. As I sat in the passenger seat I got a text back from Noah.

“Didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s pointless to crop out your face if your body has tattoos all over it?”

I laughed because he was right. I had tattoos on each thigh, one over my heart, and another on my right forearm. It is no mystery who that picture was from, with or without a head.

“Fair point LOL”

Joel looked over at me and said, “Who is that?”

I panicked because I didn’t know if he saw anything so I just shoved my phone into my pocket and tried to change the subject.

“Nobody, let’s get going. At this rate, the beer is going to be warm as hell by the time we show up.”

“You plan on drinking a lot tonight?”

I flashed the joint out of my chest pocket and said, “Nope, you know I’m not a beer drinker.”

“Perfect, you’re driving my car home then.”

We drove off and I immediately lit my joint. I don’t know if it is because I am bi, or because I moved here from another country, but I never felt comfortable at these parties. I always got a little high before going, it helped lighten my mood and make me less anxious. There were two types of interactions I was guaranteed to have every time:

• Some girl would come over and ask me to say a bunch of different words. Either they thought my Italian accent was funny, or attractive I could never tell.
• Some macho bro would be talking shit on Europeans for being sissies. Like I was the ambassador to all of Europe. Like I give a shit about what you think about Europeans.

The only thing I knew for sure was that if I was high, I would at least find it all a little funny.

We had to park on a side street because Joel’s car could not drive on the dirt road to get back to where the party was. It wasn’t a long walk, maybe 5-10 minutes. We chatted the whole way caught about school, just bullshitting. As we got closer you could hear the dull roar of a crowd, and smell the smoke from a burning fire. As we walked over a few old friends greeted us, handing us piss warm lite beers. There was country music playing and it reminded me of the last time I was out in the woods. My mind started to wander, and I didn’t notice Joel had left. He was over by a large folding table where people were playing beer pong, or six cup, or whatever they call it now. He was waving me over and shouting, “Hey Renz, we’re up next!”

I walked over and reminded him that I wasn’t planning on drinking that much tonight.

“No problem dude, I’ll drink your cups, win-win right?”

I knew for sure he was going to either pass out or puke on the way home.

The night went on and the party was fun. By the time Joel and I were leaving, he was hammered. I am happy I didn’t drink because we would have had to walk home. When we got to his car, he opened the back door and just flopped across the back seat. I swear by the time I got to the front seat I could hear him snoring. I recorded it on my phone and sent it to Noah.

“I hope you’re home because I’m gonna need your help getting him out of here LOL”

It was a little after midnight so I knew he should be done or almost done with work. I got a response of “HA! Yeah, I am on my way home now. I guess just wait out front and we can both try to get him inside.”

It was a short drive and when I pulled up I just got out and smoked a cigarette while I waited for Noah. Their house was a U-shaped single-level house. Their mom was on one end, and all the other bedrooms were on the other end of the U. It was perfect because on nights like this one you could sneak in the front door, and quickly get to their side without their mom finding out. Noah was around the corner because you can hear that ridiculous truck from miles away. When he pulled up I went over to his truck to greet him. From inside the cab I heard him say,

“Hey, come up here I want to show you something.”

I climbed up and stuck my head in the window. “Are you sure he is still asleep,” he asked.

“Yeah, what did you want to show me?”

“Nothing.”

He pulled me closer by my shirt and kissed me. His tongue quickly darted past my lips and into my mouth. It only lasted a few seconds before I broke it off and said, “Let’s get him inside, and then we can get to the fun stuff,” motioning towards Joel who was still asleep in the back of his car.

Getting Joel out wasn’t actually that hard. Once we woke him up, we walked right inside, grabbed food, and were able to get him into his room. Noah left to shower before “going to bed” and I hung out with Joel, just to make sure he would be asleep soon. I was sitting at his desk, and from Joel’s room, you can see down the hall. Noah came out of his room in just a towel heading to the bathroom and Joel drunkenly slurred, “Gross Noah, nobody wants to see that!”

I quickly grabbed my phone out of my pocket and texted Noah as he walked into the bathroom.

“Some of us do…”

I heard his phone buzz from down the hall and he opened the door back up and flashed open his towel real quick with a wink. Joel didn’t notice, I don’t even think he could see that far at this point. As I heard the shower start I looked at Joel and said

“Are you good? Can I go to bed now?”

“Yeah, I‘m about to pass out. Thanks for driving.”

I got up and started walking out of his room, we high-fived as I passed him and I shut his door tightly behind me. The guest room was right next to his so I got in and just waited for Noah to be done. At this point, I was incredibly nervous. Was I really going to try and have sex with Noah? Can we actually pull this off without getting caught? As I was sitting there, making myself anxious, I heard the shower stop. Footsteps were coming down the hall, and the handle to the guest room was being turned. On the other side of the door was Noah back in his towel but this time his body was damp and warm from the shower. He motioned for me to get up, and he whispered, “We are going to my room, be quiet.”

I got up and followed Noah down the hallway.  His room was only two doors down, but the walk felt like it took much longer. Even though I knew Joel was asleep already, I couldn’t shake the feeling that he could get up to go to the bathroom at any moment. Noah didn’t seem to care though, so I figured I must be overthinking this and tried to calm down. Noah opened the door to his room and I followed him in. I turned around to close the door behind me, and as I shut it I felt much calmer.

As I turned around, I took a look around Noah’s room. I never realized it before, but I had never been inside his room before. It’s a typical 19-year-old guy’s room though. He has his bed up against one wall, a tall dresser with a TV and Xbox on top, and a desk that was covered in junk and cologne bottles. The shelves on the walls had books, CDs, action figures, and trophies he had won in years past. In the corner, his hamper was overflowing with dirty clothes, which helped explain the smell. It didn’t smell bad in there, but it did have a scent. To me, it was like smelling your shirt at the end of the day, it doesn’t smell bad but it smells like cologne and your natural smell. Noah’s room was a mix of Axe body spray and Noah, with the faint hint of cigarette smoke.

While I was looking around his room, Noah was at his dresser trying to find something to put on the TV for background noise. He settled on a channel that was playing music videos. It was just after 1 AM, so it was that or infomercials. He turned to me, still in his towel with water droplets on his shoulders and chest, and said “There. Now we have some privacy.”

I wasted no time, and walked right up to him and kissed him, quickly getting my tongue tangled up with his. I ran my fingers through his damp hair and used my other hand to tug open the front of his towel. It dropped to the floor and his cock sprang up from underneath. I kissed my way down his neck, past his collarbone, and to his chest. I started touching his dick with one hand as I kissed his nipple. The air must have felt so cold to him because his nipples were super hard and his balls were tight up against his body. I took my hand from his dick and held his balls while still moving down his body. I kissed his abs as I got down onto my knees in front of him.

The last time we did this we were in the dark and I never got a good look at his dick. It was standing straight up in front of me, ~6 inches, tan in color with a thick purplish head. The same short pubes surrounded it, coarse and dark black. I took the head into my mouth and slowly started taking more of it into my mouth. I could feel the smoothness of the shaft against my tongue, and still smell the faint aroma of the body wash he used in the shower. The pubes on his balls were still damp from the water and I could feel the heat radiating off of him as I reached the base of his cock with my lips. I could hear him breathing heavier as I pulled my head back slowly, especially when I got back to the tip and ran my tongue over it playfully. I kept going up and down on his dick, letting the saliva run out the corners of my mouth.

It was different this time though. In the light of his room, I could feel him staring at me. His hand was gripping the hair on the back of my head and I could hear his breath getting shallower and shakier. I looked up to see if he was looking down at me, but he was looking off to the side. I think he noticed because as soon as my gaze turned up his face shot down to meet my eyes. I glanced over the see what he was looking at, and it was the mirror on his closet door. I took his dick out of my mouth, looked up at him, and said, “Really dude?”

“It’s fucking hot, please don’t stop.”

After hearing him say that I couldn’t stop, I wanted to make him cum right then. I turned my head back to face his cock and started sucking him off again. I heard him rummaging through the top drawer of his dresser, and after a bit, he was handing something down to me. It was a bottle of lube, and without saying anything I knew what he wanted. I put out a cupped hand and he squirted a generous amount of lube into it. I started kissing his shaft as I put my hand through his legs, massaging his asshole.

I was stroking his cock, licking/kissing his balls, and gently pressing the tip of my middle finger into his hole. He was much more relaxed this time, I was able to easily slide my whole finger in and he didn’t seem to be in any discomfort. I went down on his dick again and started pumping it into the back of my mouth while moving my finger in and out of his ass. Noah was moaning quietly now and he whispered, “Yes…more…don’t stop.”

I kept sucking as best as I could while still being able to play with his ass. I felt both of his hands resting on the back of my head and gripping fistfuls of hair. I knew he was close, it wasn’t long until I felt his ass clench around my finger as he started to cum. He shot streams of warm, thick cum into my mouth. I swallowed all of it. I kept slowly sucking him off as the last few drops came out and he let go of my hair. When his cock had stopped pulsing I took it out of my mouth and stood up. I wanted to see what he would do if I went to kiss him, and surprisingly he didn’t hesitate to stick his tongue into my mouth. The taste of Noah’s cum still lingered as we broke off and moved over to his bed.

 “Think you can fuck me without waking anyone up?”

I had been ignoring my own dick that whole time, but now I could feel it aching to get out and into Noah. I quickly ripped off all of my clothes, grabbed the lube, and lay down behind Noah on his full-sized mattress. He got up and turned the room light off, it was now light only by the music videos playing on the TV. He got back on the bed in front of me and backed his ass up until he was grinding up on my raging hard dick. I lubed it up as he reached back and positioned the head right up against his hole. I felt him start to press himself back up against me, trying to get the tip inside. We were in a spooning position, and he looked back at me, “I want to get it in myself this time, no help.”

The last time we did this he was so nervous I had to calm him down to get it in, but this time he was ready. I lie there still and let him slowly push back until the tip of my dick slid into him. He kept pressing down, circling his hips as he went down, letting his breath escape as he enjoyed getting me deeper inside of him. When his cheeks reached my pelvis he kept gyrating, moving up and down a little bit now, riding my dick. It was so tight, and warm, and fuck was it sensual. I was running my hand all over his torso and thighs as he rode me, listening to him lightly moan. There was enough space between my chest and his back where I could watch his whole body moving. I loved the image of him using me to get this much pleasure. I reached my arm under his and pulled him close until his back was up against my chest and I start pumping long slow strokes. He stopped moving now, letting me take control.

I put my face up right behind his left ear and kissed his neck at the base of his jaw. With each stroke, I could hear Noah moan, “mmm…mmm…mhmm.”

I lifted my left leg up, and put my foot down on the mattress. I draped Noah’s left leg over mine, holding it in place with my hand on his thigh. We were still trying to be quiet, but I was going a little faster, harder, and deeper into Noah now. I heard him letting out breathless sounds and saw his jaw hanging open from where I was behind him.

“More…more,” he whispered. I started picking up the pace, hearing the faint clapping of his ass up against my body. He reached his hand up over his head and grabbed onto the back of mine. I looked forward and our eyes met in the mirror on his closet door. I kept eye contact as I bite his neck. His head tilted back and he said, “Flip me over, I want to see your face.”

I pulled out and pushed him onto his back. I repositioned myself in front of him and slid right back into his ass. It probably wasn’t as graceful or quiet as I remember but it didn’t slow either of us down. I kept driving my cock into Noah and he kept taking it, moaning with delight. His bed frame started to shake and he quickly put his arms up, bracing his body against the wall to make it stop. The room was hot now and you could only hear the light sound of our bodies meeting and our whispered moans of pleasure. Looking down at him again like this, me balls deep inside him, his chest glistening with sweat, his cock bobbing with the motion of our bodies, I knew I wouldn’t make it much longer. I grabbed his legs and started pumping harder and faster, one last furious push towards climax.

“Mmm…ohh fuck…” These were the only words I could say.

Noah was laying there, head back, eyes closed, arms bracing against the wall, and quietly whimpering, “mhmm…mhmm”, over and over again.

A few more hard pumps into his ass and I was going to cum. I don’t know why but I decided to pull out and shoot my cum all over Noah’s stomach and chest. I came so hard that some of it even got onto his chin. As I knelt in front of him, my cock in hand, squeezing the last drops of cum out onto his body I couldn’t help but glance over at the mirror to see what it looked like from another perspective. I think Noah had the same idea because as soon as I looked over I saw his face looking back. We couldn’t help but laugh at it. He went back onto his back and laid there with his head back and eyes closed, grinning ear to ear still covered in cum. I got up, grabbed his towel, and tossed it to him. He cleaned himself up, and I went to get my clothes back on.

“You’re not leaving are you?” Noah asked. He almost looked sad that I was getting up to go.

I hadn’t even thought about not leaving, this was not supposed to be a relationship like that. I hesitated before saying anything because I didn’t know how he would take it.

“I thought you said no boyfriend stuff.”

“Fuck buddies can cuddle, no? Just for a few minutes, we’ll play some Xbox, and you can leave.” He shot me a grin and patted his bed.

Part of me really didn’t want to open up whatever this was going to open up, but something about his smile and those god damned green eyes lured me into staying. I put my clothes back on the floor.

 “Fine, we cuddle for a few minutes, I kick your ass at COD, and then I am out of here,” as I climbed back into his bed next to him.

I was the big spoon again. As I lay next to him, holding his warm body next to mine, I knew this was eventually going to blow up in my face. Right then, at that moment I really didn’t care though.

I must have fallen asleep because a while later I woke up to the sun peering through the blinds covering his window. We were both still naked in bed, and I fumbled around to find out what time it was. When I found my phone it was 6 AM, the sun must have just started to come up. I climbed over Noah as quietly as I could, got dressed, and went to go back into the guest room. I peeked out the door down the hallway just to make sure the coast was clear. I quickly got out of Noah’s room and back into the guest room. The bed was colder but I was tired as hell so I plopped down onto it and tried to get some sleep. I wasn’t as upset as I thought I would be that I ended up sleeping in Noah’s room that night. It is nice to share a bed sometimes.