The Journal

Mike learns why his mom was so upset when she called and immediately goes home. A quick trip back to Memphis to pick up Andrew and he introduces him to his mom. It doesn't go as Mike had expected.

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  • 2716 Words
  • 11 Min Read

Mike says Goodbye

I was headed back to Westburg for the first time since Christmas, this wasn’t going to be a happy trip. This time it was for a funeral. My dad had a massive heart attack at work. He was walking to his office after a meeting and grabbed his chest, the doctor said he was gone before he hit the ground. His two pack a day habit and sitting at a desk for over 20 years had caught up to him. Hell, I think the last time he exercised was his senior year in high school. My dad may have been a hard man, but he still was my father, and I did love him. Although he rarely said it, I know he loved his family and was proud of me. Losing Steve had aged dad a few years, and while at the time, I thought dad wished it was me in that accident, I know that was not true. My last year of high school and since I started college were actually pretty good with dad. Either I had matured, or dad had mellowed, or a combination of the two. I just knew I had to get home to be there for mom. I was worried about how she was going to deal with losing dad. He had run the house for over 20 years; mom just followed his lead and did what he said. I hoped she was equipped to handle all the little details.

I had called Chuck right after I hung up with mom. He told me to go home and help my mom, come back whenever I was ready. He really was a sensitive guy hiding behind his tough exterior. Andrew and I discussed it and decided that this was not the time to tell my family about us, so he stayed in Memphis. It was killing me not to have him with me, but I have a couple bigoted and homophobic relatives, and I just need to help mom right now and not worry about dealing with them. Andrew understood and said if I needed him just call and he would drive up in a heartbeat.

I made it home at about midnight. Mom was still up and her sister, Janet, was sitting with her. We hugged each other and Aunt Janet gave me a cup of coffee as she refilled mom’s and her own cup. We talked for another hour and finally decided to try and get some sleep. The next morning, we had to go to the funeral home to make the funeral arrangements. That afternoon the rest of the family started to show up. People from town stopped by and brought us all sorts of food and offered their condolences. I think I hugged almost everyone from the town of Westburg and listened to them tell me how great my dad was. I was glad to hear that most of the people in town thought dad was a good man, I was going to miss him. I must admit that I was secretly relieved that I would never have to tell him about me and Andrew.

The doorbell rang again, and I went to answer the door. To my surprise Kyle and his parents were standing on the other side.

I said, “Kyle!”

He smiled, “Hey Mike, I am so sorry to hear about your dad.” He gave me a big hug.

I said, “Thanks Kyle, come on in. Mr. and Mrs. Turner, thank you for coming.”

Kyle’s mom said, “Mike, we are sorry too. We just wanted to see how you and your mom are doing.”

I smiled, “Well, mom is in the living room. Please go on in and say hi, she will be glad to see you.”

I gave Kyle another hug, “I can’t believe you came all the way from Ohio.”

Kyle said, “We were actually in the area visiting some family when we heard the news. I talked my folks into stopping by.”

I smiled, “I am glad you did.” I turned to the living room where mom was talking to Kyle’s mom. I said, “Hey mom, Kyle and I are going for a walk, we’ll be back in a few minutes.”

She waved, “Ok, don’t be gone long. Nice to see you Kyle.”

We walked up to the shed and went inside; it still looked the same as the last time we were there. We sat down and Kyle reached into the floorboard and found the stack of Playboys.

He chuckled, “Still here.”

I laughed, “I wonder if any other 14-year-old boys have found them.”

Kyle laughed, “I better put them back, I would hate to deprive anyone of the chance to see their buddies naked.”

I asked, “So, how are your classes going?”

He smiled, “They’re good, I like my business classes and dad said that he would probably be able to get me an internship at his company next year.”

He asked, “How about your classes?”

I said, “They’re great. I am on the college paper, and I am also working for the Memphis Press. My boss is teaching me a lot. He’s tough on the outside but is really a sweet teddy bear inside.”

Kyle smiled, “I’m really happy for you Mike.”

He then moved next to me and leaned in to kiss me, after a quick peck, I pulled back.

I said, “Kyle, I have something else to tell you. I am seeing someone.”

He looked surprised, “I assumed you have been with other guys since I left. So have I.”

I stopped him, “No, I am really seeing someone. He is the only one I have been with since you left.”

He asked, “So you are like, going steady?”

I sighed, “Kyle, we are living together. It is a lot more than just sex, I really want to be with him all the time. He means a lot to me.”

He said, “Wow Mike, that is really great. You know that is so you. You have always known what you want, and you just go all out until you get it. I am happy for you.”

I said, “Kyle, there is one more thing. Andrew is black.”

Kyle thought for a minute. He asked, “You mean like in the journal?”

I nodded, “Yes, just like the journal.”

Kyle asked, “Have you told your mom?”

I shook my head, “No, not yet. I can’t now, at least not for a while. She knows I have a roommate, just not that we live in a one-bedroom apartment.”

He smiled, “As long as you are happy, then I am happy for you.”

I returned his smile, “Thanks Kyle, I am happy. Hey, we better get back to the house.”

I updated him on what I had found out about Walter and the journal as we walked back to the house. He told me to be sure and keep him updated if I found anything else.

Kyle and his folks said their goodbyes as they headed out the door. The rest of the guests had also started to thin out. I helped mom and Aunt Janet clean up and we went to bed. We needed to be at the church early the next morning for the funeral.

The church was full, and mom was holding up pretty well. I knew after all the family went home and the house was quiet; she was probably going to have a rough time. I was glad that Murph and Bug came home for the funeral, it was nice to get to talk to them too. After the funeral, mom, Aunt Janet and I went back to the house and looked through all the cards that we received. I asked mom if she had thought about what she was going to do.

She said, “No Mike, I really haven’t. I am only 48 and the life insurance your dad had won’t be enough for me to live on for very long. I will probably need to find a job.”

I said, “Mom, maybe you should move to Memphis. There are more jobs available there and at least I would be close so I could help you when you need it.”

She shook her head, “Oh Mike, you are too busy with school and your job. I would just be in the way.”

I protested, “No mom, you would not. I would feel a lot better if you weren’t so far away.”

Aunt Janet cleared her throat, “JoAnn, you know you could move in with me. Sue is leaving for college next week; it would be nice to have some company.”

Aunt Janet had divorced her husband several years ago and Sue was her youngest daughter; the older two kids were already out of the house. She lived in Jackson; it was a straight drive on Interstate 40 about an hour from Memphis.

I said, “Mom that is a great idea, I really would feel better if you weren’t alone and so far away.”

She asked, “Janet are you sure?”

Aunt Janet smiled, “Of course, JoAnn, I wasn’t looking forward to being alone. There is also an opening for a part-time teller at the bank where I work.”

Mom sighed, “Well, I will have to think about it. I would have to sell the house, get rid of this furniture. There would be so much to do.”

I said, “Mom I think you should, I can help you pack. You wouldn’t need to take much furniture; Aunt Janet already has everything you need.”

We talked about it a while longer and the next morning, mom finally agreed that it was a good idea. The three of us started to pack the things that mom would need. Mom and I went to see the Real Estate Agent and listed the house for sale. She told us that she had several people looking so she thought the house would sell quickly. We stopped at a secondhand furniture store and the owner came by the house and made mom a fair offer on the furniture. He told us he would give us an extra $100 if we hauled it to the store ourselves. I told mom that I could use Murph’s dad’s truck.

Mom said, “We are going to need more help to move the furniture, do you think there is anyone we could hire?”

I said, “I could call Andrew to see if he could come up and help.”

She said, “Oh Mike, that’s too much trouble.”

I said, “No mom, he won’t mind. Look, I need to go back to Memphis tomorrow to finish my schedule for this semester. I will bring Andrew back with me on Friday and you can be on your way to Jackson by Sunday when Aunt Janet plans to leave.”

I called Andrew and told him to pack a bag; I would be back in Memphis tonight. As soon as my meeting with my advisor was done, we would head back to Westburg. He said he was happy to help and was looking forward to meeting my mom.

Andrew Meets Mike’s Mom

We were on the road by noon on Friday. I was happy to see Andrew again and glad for the long trip so we could catch up on the last week. Andrew told me about all the things that happened at work and that he had done well on his final for his summer class.

He said, “So I know this trip was rough for you, but how are things between you and your mom?”

I said, “Things are good, she is doing much better than I was expecting. She seems so much more confident and stronger than I ever thought she was.”

Andrew smiled, “I am glad to hear that, what did she think about me coming up to help?”

I shrugged, “She didn’t really say anything, I guess I didn’t give her a chance. I really just wanted her to meet you. Do you think I should tell her about us, I mean that we are more than roommates?”

He thought a moment, “That is up to you, I will go along with whatever you think is best.”

After a few minutes, Andrew said, “I kind of think you should tell your mom about us.”

I asked, “Do you think now is a good time? She has had a rough week.”

He just said, “I think you should, but it’s your call. I will follow your lead.”

I thought a minute, “I really want to, I just think I need to find the right time. If it works out, I will.”

After a few minutes, I asked, “Does your family know that you are gay?”

Andrew nodded, “Yes, I told them before I left for college.”

I asked, “How did that go?”

He shrugged, “Not good. The only person in my family that still talks to me is my sister, Mary.”

I said, “I’m sorry Andrew. So, you haven’t spoken to your parents since then?”

He shook his head, “Nope, I tried to call a few times after I got to school, but they never returned my calls. I stopped trying, I guess if they want to talk to me, they can call me.”

I sighed, “It’s their loss Andrew.”

He gave me a small smile, “Thanks Mike.”

We drove in silence for a few miles. I said, “I need to tell you something else… Kyle stopped by the house last week.”

I had told Andrew about Kyle and me when we first started dating. He also told me about his high school boyfriend.

Andrew just looked straight ahead, “Ok. How did that go?”

I sensed his concern, “No Andrew, it was good. I told him about us, and he was happy for me. I felt really good about our talk; it was such a relief to tell someone.”

He smiled, “I am glad you told Kyle about us, I would hate to feel jealous.”

I said, “Andrew, you have nothing to be jealous about. Kyle would have liked to hook up, but I told him that you are the only one that I ever want to be with. I told him that I love you.”

Andrew relaxed, “Same here Mike, I love you too.”

We stopped at Murph’s parent’s house and got the truck and headed to mom’s. We hauled a couple loads of furniture to town that afternoon. We finished up with the rest of the furniture by noon on Saturday, we loaded the things mom was taking to Jackson into her and Aunt Janet’s cars. Mom and Andrew were getting along very well, which made me feel better. I was still searching for the right time to tell her about us.

Andrew and Aunt Janet had taken the cars into town to fill them with gas so we could all get an early start in the morning. Mom and I were finishing up the cleaning and vacuuming. We sat down to take a short break.

Mom said, “Andrew is really a nice guy.”

I thought ok here we go, I took a deep breath and said, “Yeah, he is mom. I really like him.”

She smiled, “I know, you two look at each other just like you and Kyle used to.”

I was stunned, “What?”

She took my hand, “Oh Michael, I am your mother, I can read you like a book. I saw how you and Kyle acted around each other. It was different than the way you were with Murph and Bug. When you and Andrew showed up, I could see that you were much more than roommates.”

I chuckled, “I could never pull anything on you. I really am happy with Andrew.”

She gave me a hug and said, “I know Mike, I am happy that you found someone. I am not sure your dad would understand.”

I nodded, “yeah, I guess that is why I never said anything about being gay.”

She shrugged, “Oh, I think he could have dealt with that, he might have even suspected already. Now don’t think anything bad about your dad but I think the thing that would have bothered him more was the fact that Andrew is black.

 

To be Continued…

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