The Catwalk On The Prairie

Phil had moved from occasionally wondering to outright worried sick. Dane had simply got in his truck-always a concern-took Will with him and....left. Gone. Disappeared. Left no forwarding address. Yes, his son was now 21, could do whatever he wanted but....he loved his kid, he and Dane always had a close relationship up to and including fucking each other-once. That meant nothing. He knew why Dane had just stopped his life and gone away, had a good reason to as he'd told Heck, who'd caused this absence. Heck and Dane, Dane and Heck, mated for life. Dane had given up a monstrously successful career to become a hard working rancher because, there was only one simple way to put it, he loved Heck and it was completely returned.

The phone rang which, these days, almost caused him personal injury as he made a grab for it. Of course it was nothing but...it might have been Dane, one day it would be Dane...and at that he slapped himself knowing he'd just told himself it might never be Dane. His only vague way to follow him was through their head bookkeeper, a treasure called Marigold, who, sadly, could only tell him so much.  Yes, she got bills, credit cards for example, that followed no certain path but clearly indicated he was out there. The charges she saw were the normal charges, gas, food, lodging, an occasional store name who sold whatever he'd needed...to date the largest charge had come from the Alberta Boot Company and that took no wondering as to what that was for. It took no deep thought to realize that when Dane took several thousand dollars in cash, they wouldn't hear from or about him for some while. It was his way of assuring himself he had the privacy and security he, apparently, needed and wanted. She and Phil spent hours each week while she gave him as much information and hope as she felt she legally could and he regarded a purchase of seventeen gallons of regular at a Phillips station in Texas as the holy grail.

Too, years earlier, Marigold had fallen in love first, with the boys, they were very lovable, and then with Dane's father who was equally lovable and a lot closer to her age. Never mentioned, never would be. She didn't suffer in silence about her lack of love and lust but contented herself knowing that they all loved her.

The one who worried most as it was pretty much his fault was Heck. He underestimated, how that was possible was impossible for all concerned to understand, how much he was loved. He thought a daliance with their pilot was excusable and, had Dane never known, who knows. But....he felt duty bound to tell his lover what he was doing and, here's the kick in the balls, sent someone along as a suggestion for Dane to use; That would, he thought, even the score, make things alright, smooth the waves. The reality was he was caught in a force ten gale which, when it drew back left...nothing. Dane was gone as was Will the man he'd sent. Another thing that scared the liver out of him was that Dane was a terrible driver, having never driven anything until he was 20, it wasn't a skill he'd easily or completely mastered. Then there was the souped up Ford Raptor that had been a gift. Dane had used that to take his driving test and the officer who administered it came back badly shaken as well as ashen. Dane got his license but even half a point less and, well, no point in worrying about then, now was the far larger problem. He could only hope Will was doing all of the driving; Dane was used to being a passenger and wouldn't see it as a downgrade if someone else just automatically got behind the wheel. Now, thanks to the ability of modern communication devices, he was  even more frustrated as both men had turned off theirs leaving only a modest trail of gas sales to even suggest where they might have been. Of course by the time the statement was rendered it was easily a month, or more, old so where they were a month ago had no relevance to this day, this hour, this week. What Marigold could have told him and did tell Phil was that there had been new charges for cell phones and accounts established with Verizon. But what all this added up to was...he was alive and out there and was done with all of them.

Phil walked through the lobby seeing the posters advertising the new show, Dane's show, that would star Heck, possibly still his lover as well as nineteen other guys and a horse in a novel all male beef cake show. Difference being from curtain up, this was no ordinary show. Yep, all sorts of nudity but nothing that pandered to the audience, it looked like a bunch of guys having a helluva good time and, just incidentally, wearing very little, or no, clothing. The previews were sold out, the word on the street was excellent, advance sales, even now, guaranteed a run of at least a year. He ran into Alexei who without meaning to had become the official photographer for all of this. He, too, desperately missed Dane, Dane was his friend, Dane was the best looking of all of them or was...Alexei had nightmares of a Dane showing up fat, a red blond beard, it was enough to make him cry in his sleep. 

All of them believed, though it was never said, Dane would show for the opening, he'd just have to. His sense of responsibility was such that even if he had to hire a chopper and land in the parking lot, he'd be there. 

A box came addressed to Dane that had been hanging around the barber shop in Amarillo that Bob owned. Well, he still did but he was in the show, a whole act devoted to "Sergeant Sword and His Swordsman." Someone finally thought to send it to Bob who handed it over to Phil who looked at the date. Months ago. Taking fatherly rights, he opened it and realized this was what Dane had planned on wearing to the opening. Custom tailored, nothing like it in any store and given his physique and incredible looks, he could dominate it where many men would not have been able to. He showed it to Bob and Alexei both of whom turned away. Remembrance of things passed; It was Proust, but no one knew the original French. Like a carcass ready for burial it was packed back in the box, put in Phil's closet and everyone tried to forget it even existed.

Heck was in the stable where Ram, the stallion he used in the show, lived. At least when he talked to him about what a terrible thing he'd done, what a shit he was, the horse didn't agree. Initially Ram had belonged to Dane but...when the idea for this whole thing started, Ram was the calmest horse, easiest to work with so he got purloined. Dane had been tense about it, one man, one horse was his philosophy but gave in, found himself another mount and got on with life running the 400,000 acre ranch. Some days he'd put his boots up on the desk he and Heck shared and remembered his life when he and his cousin Britt were wildly successful teen models. He missed none of it, the howling crowds, hotels that wouldn't take their reservations due to damage done by groups of wild kids elsewhere....whatever it looked like from the outside, it was not fun. He and Britt would sit in a hotel suite, the door and the hall leading to the door, and wonder if they were the only 18 year old virgin males in North America. Based on what they read about themselves, they fucked at least ten women every night when they weren't out clubbing getting drunk, doing drugs...problem was, when their attorneys challenged periodicals to prove what they'd written, they couldn't. Didn't stop the stories but it did prove a point. 

If you knew them, and few did, there were substantive differences that went as deep as character between them. Dane was responsible, needed no motivation, understood time, didn't ask for much and was endlessly patient on sets when the hours could spiral out and not one damn picture had been taken. Reverse that and you had Britt. Almost as good looking as his cousin-it was usually assumed they were twins-nothing else was the same. Temperamental, bossy, cross, mean spirited...but none of that showed in an eight by ten four color glossy. (It was rumored that some editors who had tangled with Britt ordered that in the negative room, or when they were touching up a photo that some slight imperfection be added to Britt. Nothing big but something he'd see and be pissed about. His father and his uncle were their managers and were so used to his complaints that they no longer heard them.)

Heck stood outside Phil's door; Increasingly it was only too apparent that Phil blamed him entirely for Dane's disappearance. It was agony for Heck to be around the father whose son he had lost for him out of his own desire. That was over. He knocked.
"It's me, kin I come in?"
"Sure. What's on your mind? Want a drink, no rehearsal left to day is there?"
"No. Sir, I, I need somethin' from you an' I need it bad." His head dropped to his chest. "I ain't got no right to ask but...do ya think ya ever can see yer way to forgivin' me? It was all my fault, I know that, Dane 'd be here right now iffen ....."
Phil looked out the window at the miasma of colored lighs, just now, just past sundown, seeming almost an unnatural sunset...he'd been in Vegas too long. And Heck wanted forgiveness. Sure, he could do that, say the words but...only Dane could forgive him and then maybe Phil could. This was a man he'd called son...and he wanted forgiveness for losing both of them what they loved beyond measure. Forgiveness.
"Sure Heck, if that's what you want....I'll say the words, I forgive you....Now get out of my sight."

Heck ran out the door, down the hallway, didn't bother with the elevator, just ran down the thirty flights of stairs to an outside door. The cold air stopped him, made him catch his breath but the thought that had been with him so long, since Dane left was the same, What if Dane didn't forgive him?

A long way from Las Vegas a very scared, very pained security officer was dialing a number. The service was shitty from anywhere around there but he'd made a promise and he'd keep it. While he waited for the electronic noises that accompanied any poor connection played in his ear as he looked at the handful of money he'd collected, just like they'd say to do. He was lost in mentally counting when a voice announced the name of a hotel. Kent was so startled all he could think to do was to ask to speak to Dane's Father....
A phone rang, Phil picked it up. One of the operators, they all knew him, said she had a strange call from someone who wanted to speak to "Dane's Father"? Did he want to take it or have them take a message. He took it.
Kent babbled, he was so nervous, so frightened but the man at the other end seemed real nice, worried about his son, surprised to hear he was in jail, that Will was with him....Kent, confused, started back while Phil tried to guide him forward. Finally it all got choked out, what Dane wanted, what he needed to do-which was pretty simple actually-and then the number of the man who called him. Kent was so startled to be asked a question he almost forgot the answers. Phil told him he'd call tomorrow but to tell his son the word 'Tomorrow'. And who was this Sam person? Kent tried to explain that but a storm cloud somewhere broke the connection.

His first call was to Frankie, a hot shot attorney and close friend, who could and did get things done very quickly. He told Phil to give him half an hour and he'd get back to him; It was only fifteen minutes. Phil was almost laughing, yes, they were in jail, but it was nothing that couldn't be taken care of in about six minutes the next morning early. He could have the kid and all the others out the door by ten at the latest and that was building in time for some stupidity at the jail where they were being held. Getting this Sam person out was another cake walk, pay off some fines, a couple of parole violations and that was that. Frankie said Dane could be in Vegas as soon as he chose to be, even later tomorrow. Anything else? Call him when he had other quick work, he'd done most of that sitting in his bathroom taking a dump; He'd send a bill for ass wipe paper.

He hadn't known what his son meant to him, not as a professional but as his child, the product of his sperm, the man who'd wanted him to fuck him so they'd be truly bred, father and son. He was crying as he dialed Marigold who was soon in tears herself, for ten minutes, while some strangled conversation was made, they wept for disparate reasons but the same outcome. Although she'd only met Dane a few times, their business calls were frequent and something she'd come to anticipate. As with him, her knowledge of ranching was even more limited but they both learned. Her cold ability at figures was his backstop and his enthusiasm for his work, and his man, were infectious. Privately, both she and Phil had held their breath about Heck. Time helped them let their guard down until Dane became road kill to Heck's sudden desire for another. The disappearance had them both berserk with worry and that Heck finally came to his senses did nothing but infuriate them whether he knew it or not. When Phil finally told him to get out of his sight, Heck knew how bad it was and could only get worse for him. Dane could salvage something for him, maybe, if he would, if he ever saw him again.....

Not that a few days in jail hadn't been interesting and certainly provided him with something he found he had always wanted, but released to continue living his own life he could look back with a chuckle. Sam was still stupefied, Will and Kent hadn't clear emotions but it looked like a foursome at least for some while. All would be sorted out when Dane wanted to do so and, just now, what he wanted was to relax in the large hot tub in his suite with Sam as the only other occupant.
Not much conversation at first, the swirling of the waters felt to good to both of them. From time to time Sam would look at Dane and wonder...what he wanted and whatever that was, why he wanted it from him? Twenty years older, no beauty, a past that was checkered with crime, sex, pain, jail and prison...nothing that the amazing looking man opposite him could possibly want. He slid around to sit next to him, put a heavily muscled arm over his shoulder and was pleased when the head of his buddy lay on his shoulder.
"You still haven't shaved my nuts and right now, that hair is all moist, warm, prime shaving material." He smiled. Sam gave him a crooked grin. "You gotta have more than just water 'n soap. I love to shave nuts, 'n when I like the guy, an' I really like you, I give you more'n just a shave, you'll see, just not here." I smiled, leaned over and kissed him, then took my hands, held his face in them and kissed him again, this time urging his mouth to open and give me access. He did and we were off to a great make out session, the warm water, the hot us, oh yeah, Sam was the man and not for just then. We ran our hands down, took our cocks, slowly began to jack them off. Slow, a little squeeze, we were so in sync we came at the same time and it was sensational. Looking at him, I knew that our match just got stronger, our bodies were reading each other, we were adding to the things we'd thought we might do and now would do and beyond that. There were no barriers, sex was just the door to the world we wanted and knew how to get. 

Phil was about to stall walk a rut in the carpet, they were all out, Frankie confirmed it-adding some vulgar, if amusing, comments about dealing with small town justice. No call, from anyone, but most importantly, Dane, his son, the one man he wanted to hear from. The phone finally did ring but it was Will. Phil tried to hide his disappointment, Will was a great guy and, if he hadn't been along, by now Dane would have probably wrecked the Raptor and God knows how many others. The only good thing he could think of was that he was still too young to rent a car.
"Okay, talk, Will, I'm so fucking worried and wondering...he hasn't called. Where is he...he alright? What's goint on there who's this Kent who's Sam...."
"Ya bout run down for a moment? Phil, sit, I can answer some of them questions but not all. Dane's fine, never looked better, I spect yer gonna fall over when you see him, never looked like this, never looked better iffn' you ask me. He's with Sam 'n I don' figger I can explain that cept to say he's a nice guy, you might as well know now, he's 20 years older than Dane but....
"Twenty? Fuck, he's old enough to be his father, he's just a few years younger than I am. What's the deal?"
"Best I can tell, Sam did for Dane what Heck did but in a lotta different ways. Phil, they's changes and I ain't gonna go into all that, he best explains it and you need to meet Sam an' then it'll come together. Maybe."
"What did Heck do? Let him come, live on that ranch, saw to it that he wasn't bothered and then fucked him; Sam got a ranch? He fucked him? Will..."
"It's just all real different. /Funny thing, he still loves Heck always will but, I figure, theys just gone kinda, well, different ways. Dane don't want to be up on a stage, half naked..."
"Completely naked. Even the horse is naked."
Will laughed. "So, Heck went all the way, not surprised, he sure would look great......but you ain't seen Dane, he looks a whole bunch different...promise you."
Phil chewed on that one. How different could he be? Okay, the question...."Why hasn't he called?"
"Ah, shit, Phil, I don't rightly think any of us figgered out how bad hurt he was. Heck stuck him right in his heart and his nuts. I was there, I saw it. That first day, I wasn't so much driving as I be'n on suicide watch. Then, I don't know why, we stopped for some food and there was a gym next door..."
"...and he wanted to keep in shape...I know my son."
"Sumpin like that and Phil, this I gotta tell you even though you pret much know it. That son of yers loves you like he loves no other creature on God's earth. He'd cry thinkin' about you, knowin' this bein' away had ta hurt you....Fuck Heck or Sam or anyone else, it's his Dad or nobody. Uh...He ....uh told me about how he had you....uh....."
"Fucked him. That's what I did, and he wanted me to although why...."
"Yeah, well, he said iffn he'd been bred by his Dad, then that made it a real family. Don't ask me ta explain, that's Dane talking."
Phil looked out at the lopsided life that Las Vegas always presented. He told Will to give him ten then call him back. What he wanted, more than anything, was some contact with his son, phone, Skpe, best of all, in person but he just had to make sure he was really alright. Will wouldn't lie but what was fine to him may not stretch to being the sort of 'fine' a father wants. Closed the curtains, at least that made the room seem more normal, flopped on his bed and waited for Will to call back not knowing what he planned to say. He'd worried so much that, without meaning to, he dropped off to sleep. And time passed.
It was dark. A strong hand was over his mouth, the other held him where he was and there was a body by his side. "Hey, Dad, it's just me, Dane." Phil was overwhelmed to the point that all he could do was sob, couldn't even roll over to see his beloved child. No problem, Dane picked him, found a comfortable chair and sat down, pulling his father's head to his shoulder. Phil still couldn't speak. "Did Will tell you you're the person I love best in the whole world? Did he make it clear how much I'd missed you? But....I had to have this time to find out some things, some new things about me and how my life should and would be. And not much will change. In a while I'll go back to the ranch, run it and Heck can do whatever he likes. I know the show will be a big hit and I couldn't be more pleased."
"Please, Son, can't I turn on a light, I want to see you."
"Not tonight, and there's a reason, you know me, always a reason. I'm great, never better, eating properly, washing my teeth twice a day...just like you taught me." Phil had to laugh. This was Dane the slightly casual man who sometimes seemed puzzled-and was-but worked it through.
"Gotta ask....did you learn to drive?"
"Uh, that'd be a sort of. Good enough to putt around the ranch, go to town but....uh, you better ask Will about my actual skills, he says he's better now, doesn't cringe when he thinks of me in anything with wheels. Haven't told him but....I'm going to buy an ATV and a bike."
Phil got a sick feeling. The ATV was fine, reasonably stable, the worst he could do was get lost and someone would certainly put a locator on it plus make sure that, like riding a horse, he took a pack against rough weather. But a motorcycle... He realized he was comfortable in the dark, with his Son. Leaned against what felt like a taut, large breast but said nothing. "Dad, I'm going to put you back in bed and, please, just look away until you hear the door close. I'm around and you'll see me real soon, maybe tomorrow and, of course, I'm going to the opening. I miss Ram and want to make sure he's being well treated. No one can feed him a carrot like I can." They'd reached the bed and he was laid gently on one side. He was kissed on his cheek then the unmistakable sound of boots, a door clicked, he sat up, found a light turned it on and saw on the bed...an envelope. Ripping it open, there were few words just an affirmation that his Son loved him, would forever. Signed with Submission to His Father, Dane. Odd wording but...that was Dane. He fell back on the bed both tired and relieved and, knowing what his son would have him do, he stripped and crawled under the covers but not before he stroked it down thinking of his Son all the time.

Word gets around and in a place like Vegas, so fast you forget you were the one who told somebody something and now you were being told the 'sort of' version of what you'd told. That was how it came to Heck that Dane was around, somewhere, might be at the opening. He was on fire. Had to find him, had to get down on his knees, beg him for forgiveness, plead with him, offer him anything but....he didn't have to come back....he just had to forgive him. He thought about trying to see Phil but remembering the way the last meeting ended, he decided that wasn't going to get him anywhere. Sitting at his dressing table backstage he stared at the pictures of Dane from, now, long ago. Dane in a car, Dane in an undershirt, drinking some sort of soda, being a son to a father in a commercial in which they were fishing...After that, there were no pictures, just his memory of a big, heavily muscled man doing chores, sitting at a desk with his boots up, his shirt so unsnapped that the sternum looked like a modest canyon between his pecs. Tears slid down his face, his head hit the table he wondered about killing himself, hanging from any tall construction crain. There was a knock. Figuring it was someone from the show, he rose up, tried to wipe his face and called that it was open. Will walked in.
It was as close to Dane as he might get which is why he grabbed him, kissed him and practically dragged him to a chair. Will endured this having figured in advance Heck was likely to over-react; He did.
So many questions, Will's head couldn't keep up and in listening they were all variations on a couple of themes: A. Where's Dane and when can I see him and B, a more somber one concerning forgiveness, his, and how Dane felt about what had happened. Will wasn't in a position to really answer either of them although he had some idea in at least one case.
"Heck, I want you to sit in your chair, put your hands behind it, palms out...." He did then heard and felt the sound of a pair of cuffs. Two more, one for each ankle to the chair, a blindfold and, by holding his nose, a gag.
In the darkness, Heck heard Will's boots walk away, a door open and close then another pair of boots walked toward him. No man makes the same sound with their boots which was why Heck inhaled so sharply, had to be Dane, just had to be. No one else walked like that. Closer to him he had the sense of the man smell that every guy has and is different. For those who love a man, that scent is as specific as a finger print. He felt a kiss on his cheek followed by silence only broken by the sound of a small chair being dragged to be beside him. He knew tears were flowing down his cheeks, he could feel them plummet from his jaw to his chest....But there was silence, the killing, chilling silence, the quiet that almost always precedes, "I don't know how to tell you this."

"I've missed you, cowboy, missed you more than I can really express. Wasn't a day that I didn't think of you, remember you, recall all the wonderful time with you. That last day, when Will brought me the message, I loved you then just knew you'd gone away and I'd have to live the rest of my life without you. See, Heck, in my mind, loving one person is eternal, death doesn't stop it, all that does is change things. So....you don't need forgiveness from me, you had it right there on the road when Will told me about Andy." He breathed deeply. "Can't tell you I wasn't hurt because I was, incredibly hurt, thought, well, without Heck, life ends. Bless Will, he kept me going and gradually I found new interests and a new man. Not like you, but he does for me what I would not expect you to know to do. I didn't know it till that day Clem and Britt got fucked up with the whip. I wanted to run out, grab the whip and tear into them until they were flayed, their skin hanging from them, blood pouring out then turn them, take some bolt cutters whack off their cocks and balls and let them hang there until they bled out, dead. You were generous to them, almost kind and wherever they are now, they'd be lucky if they never saw me again."
He heard the sound of boots being pulled off; Dane wore ones with very hight shafts, eighteen inches, so the sound was more pronounced. Shirt pulled out, unbuttoned, shucked off. He stood up, the clunk of the brass buckle with his initials as it was opened and fell to one side, the buttons down the front of his Levis being popped open, the whoosh as the pants fell to the floor then walking. He was standing in front of Heck, remembering the very good times they'd genuinely had and might have again. "Remember the first thing you did to me? Some things you don't forget. I'm going to take the gag out but, Heck, find another use for your mouth besides talk."
Heck could feel the warmth of his body coming close. He was holding onto the back of the chair, the gag was pulled and his mouth was immediately reintroduced to Dane's wonderful cock, right there, at the tip of his lips. He desperately wanted to say something but figured this was part of the penance for what he'd done. As he had before, so he did now, took in that fine piece of meat, began to wash it, got it harder then skedaddled it back to his throat, sealed his lips and began the road to draining him. His wonderful Dane had come back.....at least for these few minutes, they were together, joined in one of the few ways man can be. He worked hard, thought he could feel the oncoming rush. While it came, Dane drew it out, covered his finger with what was left, raised it to his nose, down to his mouth and ate it. The gag went back in, Dane got dressed then, standing behind Heck, he but his hands on his shoulders, kissed the back of his neck, straightened up said he'd fix it up with his Dad, get him back in his good graces, he could be his son again. Wished him luck with the show, leaned over once more and unlocked one cuff on one wrist leaving the key in the lock then he was gone.

Sam was waiting a couple of blocks away. In my shabby clothes, slouch hat, oversize coat I looked like...nothing. Just another bum in the back water of Las Vegas. Hopped in the car, leaned over, kissed him, rubbed his package and leaned against him. "Tough, huh?"
"Yeah, Dad particularly, he was so glad to see me but he couldn't quite, in the dark room, just hearing my voice, holding him....:"
"You love him a lot doncha."
"Yep, that I do just hope he's up for the next change. Then there's Heck. Saw him, good thing we thought that out. He's had a taste of what we want, just doesn't know it. Left a key in a lock so he could get out, made no promises about the future, he was gagged so there were no questions, wouldn't have answered them if there were. He's the last person to understand our world but the man who loves me. Kinda shitty isn't it. You love me, too."
"Yeah, I do. I guess it comes down to what yer gonna do and how and when."
"Could we put this discussion over till after the opening, that's going to tell me some things."

He drove us to a buddy of his, one he'd met after prison but with whom he'd bonded over commonality of interests. Since mine were the same, or developing that way, I was welcomed into the very exclusive group of men to whom their bodies are made to be used, and used hard, then sexually taken to limits few would attempt for which few would attempt-that's where the strong bodies also came in and we had those. When Dad and Heck saw what I'd made of myself....it was going to be an interesting moment.
We walked back to the guest room, stripped lay down on the bed and called him, we were ready for the night. Leather wrist cuffs attached to chains which were winched up. Clips on nipples, deep mouth gags-made like cocks-leather hood, only the nose was open, the steel chastity cage and belt were put in place, had to roll each of us slightly to stick the steel dildos up our asses, rolled back the belt was tightened making our nuts almost go into our bodies while the cock holders were long and kept in place by a sterilized skewer that went through our meat and out the other side. Leather cuffs on the ankles, chains to stretch us and, finally, he could turn the crank and we were both side by each at the edge of pain. We slept. There was a chain cross that went from our hips to our shoulders loosely fastened.
Later in the night, when the tanning lights came on, it would add to the chain image on our chests. Eventually, this same criss cross pattern would be applied to most of our bodies waiting for the next stage of recession into the chain and bondage masters and monsters we were to make ourselves.