Where Do We Go From Here?
John woke first, and sudden panic swept over him as he wondered if everything was another fantasy he lived out in a dream. The feel of Kent’s warm body against him, and the smell of the sheets, told him it was real. It happened.
The sun was just rising, and he heard the waves on the beach. Kent still lay partially on top of him.
I’ve missed sleeping with another man. What I wouldn’t give to wake up to this man every morning.
John felt apprehensive about Kent’s state of mind when he woke up. John’s bladder was about to burst, so he extricated himself but ended up waking Kent.
He smiled, “Morning.”
“Good morning.”
Kent followed him into the bathroom, and they both pissed into the bowl.
I’m standing with Kent, naked in the bathroom, taking a piss. This can’t be real.
They both remained quiet, each wanting the other to say something. They made eye contact and started to laugh. Returning to the bed, they lay on top of the sheets.
John tentatively asked, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, John. Last night was incredible. Thank you.”
“Where do we go from here?”
“John… the sex was over the top. I get what my buddy Will used to tell me. I feel closer to you than ever, but I’m not sure that’s enough for you.”
“It’ll be enough if we can keep doing this.”
“I don’t want to lead you on. You can’t put your life on hold, hoping that something in me will change. I’m not wired the way you want me to be.”
“Do you really believe that? Or are you repeating what you tell yourself about how you're supposed to feel?”
Kent raised his eyebrows and said, “That’s a good question. I don’t know.”
“In the big picture, does it matter? I want you to be happy, Kent. That hasn’t changed from the first day we met. I want you to be healthy and whole and able to move on with your life. I want to be a part of that life more than anything.”
“I’ll never be whole… I don’t mean that in a bad way, so don’t freak out on me. John, I’m closer to you than I’ve ever been to anyone. I want to stay friends. Can you promise me it won’t fuck with you if we stay friends with benefits? But I don’t want you waiting on me. If some guy comes along who’s right for you, you need to be available.”
John became teary-eyed at Kent’s words and said, “I’ll try. Let’s get you through everything first, okay? There’s one rule, though, that I can’t break. We can’t fool around at the hospital. It’s too dangerous, even late at night. My career would be over if we got caught.”
“I understand. I go to your place a few times a week anyway. We’ll make up for lost time then.”
Kent smiled when he said that, and his arms tightened around John.
John said, “Let’s jump in the shower and hit the beach. This is our last full day to get some sun. We need to head out tomorrow after lunch. I’ll do all the laundry in the morning.”
Kent pulled John closer and pressed his hard-on against John and asked, “Can we get off before we shower?”
John moaned and said, “I think I created a monster.”
“Yeah, this is your fault. You broke that barrier, and now it’s time to pay the piper.”
“I want to do something a little different. Let me get behind you.”
John maneuvered them so his back was against the pillows, with Kent’s back against his chest.
“I want you to jack off for me. I want to see how you get yourself off, so I can make it better for you.”
Kent felt John’s erection against his back, hard and hot. John handed him the bottle of lube, and he dribbled some on his cockhead and let it run down the shaft. John’s hands started caressing his shoulders and chest.
“God, you’re so beautiful. You have no idea.”
Again, John’s emotions seemed to bleed through his touch. No one had ever loved Kent like John seemed to, and the sensation went straight to his dick. John used his fingertips to lightly rub Kent’s nipples, and his cock surged involuntarily.
His gasp brought a chuckle to John, “You should have told me your nipples were sensitive. It adds an entirely new element to make you feel good.”
John wrapped one arm around Kent’s head, running his fingers through Kent’s hair and across his forehead while his other hand ran through the auburn hair covering his chest.
The bright sun leaked through a break in the curtains and had moved partially across them, and it hit Kent’s cock and across his abs and partially over his chest. The heat felt good, and his lubed-up cock shone brightly in the dim room.
John continued holding and caressing Kent while he stroked, watching his cock intently. Occasionally, he kissed the top of Kent’s head or temple and pressed his hand more firmly on his chest. The comfort, physical and emotional, that John brought to the simple act of Kent jerking off elevated it to something more.
“Take your time. There’s no hurry. Enjoy this.”
Like everything he did throughout Kent’s tenure at the hospital, John's coaching was for him. In about ten minutes, Kent picked up his pace, and his body started squirming. John loved to see his abs tighten with pleasure and how the muscles in his arms, shoulders, and chest flexed. He watched Kent widen his thighs, pushing his cock upwards. When he came, he shot over his shoulder and hit John’s chin. He had worked up a sweat, and John smelled him. Kent’s musky smell turned him on. The sun brought out the deep auburn of his body hair, and John could see his skin shining underneath the hair.
Kent lay still for a moment to catch his breath, and then he rolled off John and reversed their positions. He cradled John in the same manner and said, “You’re turn.”
John was already close, and the feel of Kent against him, his powerful arms holding him, triggered John’s impending orgasm. He grunted as his cock spurted ropes of cum across his chest. Kent patted his chest and smiled.
“Now it’s time for a shower.”
“We need food too, so I’ll make some omelets, and then we can hit the beach.”
While Kent watched John make breakfast, he asked, “Why am I not allowed to swim? I’m a great swimmer.”
“Dr. Hiner’s orders.”
“Does it have something to do with my scars? Like salt water isn’t good for them?”
“I don’t like to speak bad about Dr. Hiner, but if he has one flaw, it’s that he’s too timid sometimes. Your scars are healed. They will still tighten and shrink with the right treatment, but they are deep.”
John knelt and gripped Kent’s stump, examining the scars where his flesh was literally folded and stapled to seal it. Kent was meticulous about applying the lotions he was provided to keep the tissue pliable, heal better, and keep the area clean.
When John looked up, Kent had this hurt puppy look that he often got when he was told he couldn’t do something he wanted to try.
John couldn’t help but laugh and said, “You fucker.”
Standing, John said, “Okay, here’s the deal. We have to make a pact here. Dr. Hiner cannot know you went swimming in the ocean. When we get out, you need to rinse off immediately. There’s an outdoor shower at the end of the ramp. We’ll take your lotions, dry your leg, and apply them after you rinse off. I want to be extra careful here.”
Kent fist pumped and said, “Fuck, yeah. Thanks. I love swimming.”
“The undercurrent here is pretty strong, so be aware. The water is also cold, so prepare for some major shrinkage. Also, the tide is high right now, but the water isn’t more than chest deep unless you go far out, which you will not do. You’ll be able to swim to your heart's content.”
The morning was fun for both of them. Kent did swim like a fish, and he quickly adapted to only having one leg, using his stump to effectively help maneuver in the water. John enjoyed the sight of his wet muscles. He began to tire after half an hour and crawled out of the water. John handed him his crutch, and he made his way to the shower. The crutch was awkward in the sand, but he managed.
John brought a higher SPF cream and got hard when Kent let him rub it over his body. Kent returned the favor and commented, “Jesus, John, you’re a horny fuck. You’re almost as bad as me.”
“Let’s stay out here another hour and then go in. We can rinse off and have some fun, and then it’ll be time for lunch. Then we can come back out if you want.”
John used his iPhone to set a timer so they could turn over. Kent was right about tanning fast. In just a day and a half, John noticed him getting darker. Any redness he had from the previous day had tanned overnight, and he was already building on that.
They remained quiet while lying on the blanket, each lost in his own thoughts. Both of them became hard on and off, thinking about the sex that was about to happen. When John’s phone went off the second time, they gathered their blanket, towels, and lotions, and went inside. John went into the bathroom to clean out, and then they bantered and hung shit on each other while John threw lunch together. When Kent finished, he stood and hopped to the sink to clean his plate.
“Just leave it in the sink. I’ll get it later.”
Turning, Kent laughed when he saw the head of John’s cock sticking up out of his bathing suit.
“Someone’s ready.”
Kent stripped off his bathing suit, and his erection slapped against his abs. One of John’s kinks was hard cocks that stood up against the body. All cocks were nice, but he preferred guys who stood at attention and didn’t hang. Kent’s pointed straight up and already leaked precum.
As soon as they entered the bedroom, Kent asked, “Can I fuck you?”
John set the lube on the nightstand and got on all fours in the middle of the bed.
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
Kent set his crutch against the doorframe and hopped to the bed. He had to use John’s body to help him leverage his position.
John said, “Put some pillows under your stump.”
Kent did, and his cock perfectly aligned with John’s ass. Lubing himself first, he then used a few fingers to ensure there was plenty on John. Kent looked down at John’s muscled back. His broad shoulders tapered down in a nice V-shape to his trim waist. His ass was solid too, and Kent had to use his hands to spread his cheeks apart.
“I’ve never really complimented you on your body, John, but you’re a fucking stud. You were already big when we met, but all the hard work you put in helping me has paid off.”
Kent rubbed the head of his cock over John’s hole a few times and smacked his ass with his cock. He liked the sensation and the sound. John wiggled his ass a little and pushed back.
Leaning forward, Kent gripped John’s shoulder with one hand and guided the head of his cock with the other. As soon as his head was in, he gripped John’s other shoulder. John tensed at the initial sting, and sweat popped out on his back. The room was warm and dim, and their sweat made it more humid.
John moaned, “Fuck.” His voice expressed the discomfort.
Kent stopped pushing and rubbed John’s back, massaging his shoulders to help him relax.
“You okay? You wanna use those poppers again?”
“Yeah, I think I need to. I don’t want to use them all the time.”
With John’s first deep inhale, his ass loosened some, but Kent waited until John was ready.
“Okay, push.”
Sinking to the hilt, Kent closed his eyes and threw his head back. John’s glorious, warm hole wrapped around him again. He moved his hands to John’s waist and started a slow and steady motion. Looking in the mirror, he saw his muscular body, shining with sweat, fucking his closest friend. The image reinforced what he was doing, and that John not only allowed it but wanted it.
“What can I do to make it better for you?”
“It already feels good, but when I’m on my back with my legs up, your cock hits different. It rubs over my prostate, and it’s incredible. If you do it right, I’ll cum hands-free.”
Kent started to pull out to change positions, but John said, “Keep doing this for a while.”
Kent started to feel the strain in his bad leg, and he leaned forward, pressing his chest against John’s back. John flattened his body so Kent draped his full weight on him, and wrapped his arms around John’s chest and neck from behind, holding them tightly together. Kent’s ass flexed and tightened with each thrust, and John matched his movement, squeezing with every thrust.
The sensation of Kent’s hard, hairy body, covered in warm sweat, made John’s cock surge. The sound of the bed creaking filled the room, and Kent alternated between going slow and sensual to full-on pounding.
Kent was a machine. John knew how strong he was from working out together, and like everything Kent did, he put everything he had into it.
After twenty minutes, John said, “Let me get on my back.”
Kent pulled out briefly, and they repositioned, with Kent bridging himself over John. He knew John liked to see his body. They made eye contact and both men smiled. John cupped Kent’s face and brushed the hair back off his sweaty forehead, then his hands moved to caress his arms, shoulders, and chest, getting off on the sight of the tension in his muscles as he held himself up. John wrapped his ankles around Kent’s waist, and with his ass angled right, he gasped when Kent started hitting his prostate.
Kent grinned, “Found it. Hang on.”
Kent started long, steady strokes at that angle, and John squeezed his eyes shut as he gasped with each hit. It didn’t take long before he said, “I’m cumming!” and he shot all over his stomach and chest.
When he came, his ass muscles clenched down, and the sensation triggered Kent to drive his cock all the way in and stop as he spent his load. John felt each pulse, and the two men held tightly onto each other through their orgasms.
Kent stayed on top, holding John, and he felt John’s breath against his neck. He wasn’t sure if the sex would be as good the second time. He knew it would be good, but it felt even better. He never imagined sex with another man could feel so incredible. Kent’s body count of women wasn’t that high… he had gone into the Marine Corps young, and with two deployments out of the country, the opportunity for sex wasn’t there. But the women he had been with were nothing like John. They weren’t as physical and into his body like John was. They made it about them and not him. The exact opposite of John.
He finally rolled off, but John stayed against him, one leg draped over his, and his head on Kent’s chest. He didn’t want the physical contact to end, and Kent had to admit he liked it too.
Kent exhaled heavily and laughingly said, “Fuck, me. Thank you again.”
John said quietly, “Don’t thank me. It’s not about that.”
“I wish I understood what you get out of it.”
“Have you ever been in love with someone?”
Kent had to think about it, and quickly came to the realization that the answer was no. It upset him, and he choked up, “No. How fucked up is that? I love my buddies like brothers, and you, but I’ve never been in love.”
“Whenever that happens, you’ll understand. I wish you could see yourself like I do, Kent.”
While they talked and cuddled, John’s hand worked its way down to Kent’s cock, and started playing with it. Kent got hard again, and John kissed his way down Kent’s chest until he was at his cock, and took him in his mouth.
Like everything John did, he made it about Kent and pleasured him in a way that blew his mind. He wondered how many guys John had been with to be as skilled as he was.
Kent didn’t try to hold back, and John got him off after only a few minutes. He noticed John was hard again and held him while he jacked off. Just touching John intimately while naked together did the trick. It made him sad for some reason, but he didn’t say anything.
Both men were relaxed after releasing a few loads and chilled out in the sun, sipping beers. Occasionally, they reapplied the sunscreen, lathering it over each other and rubbing it in. They were just two buddies helping each other out in public, and there was nothing sexual about it.
After dinner, they watched the sunset together. John seemed a bit melancholy about their weekend coming to an end. It was a life-changing time, and he wanted it to last forever. Kent now knew he was gay, and they were having sex. He had Alicia to thank for it and planned to call her soon and explain everything.
For dinner, John made orange-glazed chicken stir-fry with vegetables and brown rice. In the middle of eating, Kent almost choked when he started to laugh. After drinking a big glass of water, John asked, “What brought that on?”
“I just had a stupid thought, but it struck me funny.”
“And….”
“I wonder how your ass can stay so tight when you keep pulling all these amazing recipes out of it.”
John blinked and then started laughing too, which started Kent laughing again. Kent had to swipe the tears out of his eyes from laughing so hard.
Laughing, he said, “That’s not silly, it’s fucked up. Funny, but fucked up.”
Once dinner was done and the kitchen cleaned, John said, “I have one more surprise, if you have any interest. Tonight’s kind of chilly, so we can have a fire if you want. Mom always keeps everything to make s’mores, too, if you want something sweet for dessert.”
“Hell, yeah, to both.”
“There’s a fire pit around the side of the house. There should be plenty of wood. Follow me.”
The fire pit was larger than Kent thought it would be and was obviously well used. It wasn’t one of those small prefab kinds from Home Depot. This one was hand-made by someone well-skilled at stonework. Iron grates were stored in the small shed with the wood and supplies for cooking.
The chill of the air made the fire pleasant, and the smell of burning wood brought back memories to Kent. They had one s’more each, but their diet wouldn’t allow for more, and Kent even said, “We’re gonna have to work those off this week, but they were so worth it.”
John found fires relaxing, and he let his thoughts drift, but he could only think about Kent and how things would work out over time. The fact that Kent couldn’t love him back would take time to settle in. In the short term, sex and intimacy fended off his sadness, but he knew it would come back soon enough, and probably worse. As happy as he was this weekend, he feared the long-term effects on his heart.
Kent observed John. As a Recon Marine, details and observation were ingrained into him. Once John professed his feelings, Kent was more observant. He read John’s body language and watched his eyes, and he was afraid for his buddy.
Out of the blue, Kent said, “I’m sorry, John, that this is so hard for you.”
“You didn’t do this. I did it to myself. I even tried to guard against it, from the first time I saw you, before you woke up.”
“What do you see in me? I don’t get it.”
“You have no idea how you affect people, Kent. Your physical presence is imposing enough, but with your looks, you draw people in without realizing it. There isn’t a dry vagina among the nurses when they see you.”
“Are you fucking with me?”
“I wish I were. Even the married ones want to have your babies.”
Kent went silent for a moment before he said, “I’m just me.”
John sighed and said, “Yeah, you are. And that makes you even more attractive.”
John chuckled and teased, “There was a pool among them on how big your dick is. And if you were cut or uncut. My God, they wouldn’t leave me alone for the first few weeks. I finally had to throw them a bone.”
Kent looked stunned and asked, “What did you tell them? You didn’t take any pictures of me while I was unconscious, did you?”
John actually sounded offended.
“Fuck, no. I’d never do that. No, I told them you had a micro-penis and lost both balls.”
Kent burst out laughing, “You fucker.”
“Hey, at least they lost interest after that. Until one of the surgical nurses ratted you out. I told her she could lose her job for a HIPAA violation, and sent her packing.”
Kent shook his head, “Goddamn. What the hell kind of hospital am I in?”
“One filled with horny, frustrated women.”
“I’m glad I got you, then.”
“Me too, obviously. Dr. Hiner may not seem aware, but he’s very astute. He knows I’m gay and assigned me to you. He knew I’d protect you from the Amazon Nurses of Death that work there.”
“Is any of that bullshit you just spewed real?”
“You’ll never know, unless you torture it out of me.”
They continued to laugh, and the conversation stayed light. Around midnight, the fire died down, and John stopped feeding it.
“It’ll burn itself out by morning. Come out to the beach with me, I want to show you something.”
Grabbing his crutch, Kent followed. The tide was out and there was no moon, so it was eerily dark. The waves were audible, but invisible in the darkness. All the houses but theirs were dark.
“Close your eyes and wait.”
“How long?”
“It takes a few minutes. Not long.”
Finally, John said, “Open your eyes and look up.”
Kent had seen it before, in the dead of night, out in the hills and away from any city in Afghanistan. The spiral arm of the Milky Way was clearly visible overhead. Savannah was so far away that no ambient light washed out the stars.
Kent stayed silent, staring at the beauty in the night sky.
John said, almost to himself, “It makes me feel very small and insignificant, but it also gives me hope.”
“Hope for what?”
“That I’m not alone. In all that space, there has to be someone for me.”
The sadness in John’s tone tore at Kent’s heart.
<><>
After they woke the next morning, they had sex again, and John made them breakfast. He started laundry, and then joined Kent on the beach for another few hours of sun. The plan was to shower, eat lunch, pack, and head home. John let Kent drive again.
They drove to the hospital and got Kent situated in his room.
Both of them seemed a bit melancholy about the trip ending. What happened at the beach house touched both men deeply and would be with them the rest of their lives.
As John turned to leave, Kent said, “Hey, John, close the door a sec.”
He did and came back, and Kent grabbed him, pulling him into a tight embrace.
“Thank you for the weekend. For all of it. It was the best time I’ve had in years. Maybe ever”
John didn’t want to get emotional and embarrass them, so he hugged Kent back and said, “You’re welcome, and me too, so we’re even.”
The disparity of their feelings for one another went unmentioned, but it was there. However, the upside was still acknowledged.
John whispered, “You’ll just have to keep it in your pants until the weekend.”
Kent laughed, and John left. Once he got in his car, he cried.
<><>
John had a hard time not spilling the beans about Kent’s first prosthesis. The next afternoon, after Kent’s morning therapy, Dr. Hiner came in. Kent wore his shorts and tank top, and his usual sleeve covered his stump.
Dr. Hiner winked at John, who knew it was time, and he said, “John, would you mind?”
Smiling, John took off, leaving Kent confused.
“What’s going on?”
“One moment, Mr. Moore. Before John comes back, let me examine your leg. Please remove your sleeve.”
Dr. Hiner performed a thorough visual exam, and wearing gloves, he carefully palpated all around the stump.
“I’m very pleased with your progress.”
“Thanks, doc. My leg feels great. With John’s help, I’ve actually been able to gain strength in that leg. I didn’t think that was possible.”
“Yes. I commend your efforts, and John’s.”
John returned holding something wrapped in a sheet. With a flourish, he whipped off the sheet to reveal Kent’s first artificial leg. It was state-of-the-art, made from a combination of carbon and titanium.
“Stand between the balance beams, please, and we will see how it fits.”
Kent was overwhelmed with emotion and started to tear up. The leg represented freedom from that cursed crutch and marked a significant step toward living independently. The leg was a simple socket fit, custom-made from a mold taken a month earlier.
“You need to be careful not to overtax the tissues. Your leg isn’t accustomed to supporting your weight. John will manage your schedule, but I recommend not exceeding two hours today, and you can add an hour every other day. If you notice any soreness, stop immediately and check for swelling. I know you’re anxious, but please pace yourself to avoid setbacks.”
Overwhelmed with emotion, Kent struggled to regain his composure. John patted his shoulder and said, “This has been a long time coming. All the hard work you’ve put in has prepared you for this. You’re one step closer to getting out of here.”
Happy to see Kent so elated, Dr. Hiner left him and John to begin his new therapy.
John grabbed his clipboard and said, “Okay, some of this will be new to you. As simple as it sounds, you need to learn to sit in a chair and stand up. When you have that down, we’ll move on to some other basic motor skills.”
Kent was surprised at how tough it was. Everything he relied on with two healthy legs no longer felt the same. His frustration was evident, but John kept him calm and focused, and he adapted quickly.
“It’s basic muscle memory techniques, just new ones.”
Kent ended up sitting and standing for a whole hour, and he was sweaty by the time they finished.
John held up his hand for a high-five and had a shit-eating grin on his face.
“I’m proud of you, buddy. Let’s work on some more complex moves, then wrap it up for today.”
<><>
It was challenging to keep himself in check, but Kent didn't want any setbacks. He could tell when his leg was getting tired and would stop before any soreness set in. He gradually increased his time over the next month until he could wear the prosthesis for most of the day.
John always planned a big steak dinner on Saturday nights for all his hard work. Afterward, they had sex, and then slept together and stayed naked in bed most of Sunday. Once Kent was comfortable with his new limb, John bought game tickets to any sports events Kent liked. Kent was slowly adapting well, and John saw his time with Kent coming to an end.
The following Monday morning, 10:00 am came and went, and John wasn’t anywhere to be found. During their entire time together, he was always punctual and often early. By 11:00 am, Kent went to the nurses' station and found Barbara.
“Has John called? He’s an hour late.”
Barbara tried John’s cell phone, but it went straight to voicemail.
Another hour went by. Kent went to the Rehab room and started his exercises, but he was worried and not focused. He heard someone running down the hall, and Barbara rushed into the gym, crying.
“John’s been in a car accident. He’s in surgery at Gwinnett Medical.”
Kent’s world stopped, and his chest tightened to the point where he could hardly breathe.
He heard himself ask, “How bad is it?”
“I don’t know any details, but if he’s in surgery, it’s not good.”
John grabbed his bag and pulled out his phone as he asked, “How far is Gwinnett Medical?”
Barbara said, “I’m sorry, but you can’t leave unescorted.”
“Can you take me?”
“Not right away.”
“Then try and stop me.”
Kent stormed out of the room to the elevator, sweaty and dressed in his gym clothes. He called an Uber and waited outside the hospital's front entrance.
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