Drop and Give Me 50

Chapter 2: Hey Mom!

This isn’t the type of thing you discuss with your mother. “Mom, when I jack off, my cum doesn’t fly like it does on the porn I watch with Brent when his parents are out of town.” Baseball season was about to start, and my annual sports physical was just around the corner. I decided to wait until then to bring it up. My mom had stopped coming back with me years ago, so I knew I would have the ability to speak privately with the doctor. My mom’s company changed insurance plans, and as a result, I had to change doctors. My previous doctor was a pediatrician, and being eighteen, my mom just signed me up for a regular G.P.

I drove myself to the appointment. My name was called, and I was escorted by the nurse to the scales and then to a room. After the typical formalities, she folded up the chart, and told me Dr. Grant would be in shortly. I had been thinking about this moment for months now and knew I couldn’t chicken out. The wait seemed like forever.

The door opened, and a tall blond guy in his mid-thirties walked in, shook my hand, and introduced himself as Dr. Grant. He was a far cry from my crusty old pediatrician. He turned toward the sink to wash his hands and even through the white coat, I could tell he was in incredible shape. He opened the chart and asked, “So, what sport do you play?” I replied, “Baseball.” He said he played first base as a walk-on in undergrad. This immediately set me at ease, and my fears of chickening out calmed down a bit. He pulled a pen out of this coat pocket and started to ask a series of questions. “Are you sexually active?” I replied, “With the exception of masturbation, sadly not.” He smiled and said it was nothing to be ashamed of. He asked about drugs, drinking, seat belts, and the list went on. These were not the kind of questions my previous doctor asked. I guess it was different going to a grown-up doctor.

He said, “On your paperwork, you checked urinal tract. What kind of issues are you experiencing?” Well, the moment had finally arrived, and to my amazement, I wasn’t all that scared, and I just started talking. “I have a congenitally constricted urethra. It’s never been a big deal. I don’t get infections, but I can’t write my name in the snow.” He chuckled at my joke and asked, “So, it doesn’t bother you?” I hesitated. “Well, up until recently, no.” Long pause. “I was jacking off with a buddy. We were watching porn, and his cum shot out like a gun, and mine just dribbles. Until that point, I never knew any different, but it seemed like a lot more fun for him, and I’m wondering if I’m missing out somehow.”

He got a serious look and said, “The short answer to your question is yes.” I was a little shocked. I had never experienced such a frank conversation about sex with a doctor or anyone for that matter. He went on, “Your ejaculations are a key element in the quality of your sexual wellbeing, and that is tied to your mental health, happiness, confidence, and overall self-image. Men’s identity is closely tied to their sexuality, and physical performance problems create a host of other issues. When you discovered this issue, did it cause you any anxiety?” I could barely make eye contact with him and through a bit of sniffles, I managed to eek out a soft, “Hell yeah.”

By this time, the months of waiting, the shame, and the lack of anyone I could talk to caught up with me emotionally, and I had a small breakdown. Assessing that the situation was going to take more time than what was typically allotted for a sports physical, he said he had one more patient for the day and that he would return as soon as he could. He asked if I had time to do some tests that may help. I told him I had driven myself to the appointment, and short of dinner at home, I had as much time as needed.

The time alone was a relief. I got a chance to catch my breath. This was all unfolding rather quickly, and I wasn’t really expecting the waterworks to spring up like that. Fifteen minutes later, he opened the door. His lab coat was gone, but he was wearing a tie. He didn’t shut the door, and from what I could see, everyone had gone home.