Todd didn’t have a girlfriend; I’d heard him say that he was too focused on his sport and did not have the time. Could that be an excuse? A cover. Regardless, nothing could stop me from pretending to work on homework in the gym after school while he practiced. I’d get there before the guys came in to get my seat. Lots of the kids gathered in the gym after school, so I didn’t stick out. And no one really noticed how my head was tilted toward my work but my eyes looked out at the gymnasts. Except by John Snyder, and I was sure that I’d caught him looking at me several times during the previous week or two.
John was an average looking guy who was way smarter than average and must have been in the gym for reasons similar to my own. He sat down next to me one day, and after Todd did his routine on the rings, John leaned over and whispered, “Neither of us is going to get what we really want.”
“And what’s that?” I tried to ask as if he wasn’t on to me.
He gave me that look that meant he couldn’t believe I was feigning ignorance. “Based on the ‘TF’ that’s written several times in the margins of your notebook, you either want to fuck or get fucked by Todd Fairburn.”
My ears felt hot. My heart rate shot up, and I was worried that my hands would begin to shake.
He changed positions and moved a little closer to me. “I, on the other hand, want to get fucked by Juan Ramirez. In case you don’t know, he’s the short-stop on our baseball team, and he’s the sexiest and best looking guy at this school.” He smiled. “We both know that the chances of that happening are zero. Well, they are for me. You’re so fucking good looking that half the straight guys in this school would bend over for you. Anyway…”
I was still trying to force my breathing to remain steady. “What’s your point, John?”
“I want to suck your dick.”
That took me by surprise. I thought about that for a second. I hadn’t expected someone to just sit next to me and say that, especially after telling me he wanted sex with a different guy. “You want to suck my dick because you don’t think Juan will let you suck his?”
“Well, I’m still going to try to get Juan to let me suck his at some point, but if I practice first and am really good, it might lead to other things. I don’t figure he’ll ever fall in love with me. I’m a realist, but I can pretend for as long as possible.”
How sad, I thought. He’s in love with this guy, or at least, what I considered love at that point in my life, but he holds no hope for this guy to reciprocate his feelings. I had the urge to put my arm around him. Maybe I could help him out by talking to Juan. Maybe I should just do what he asked, let him practice, but I remembered how it felt to have the end of my dick chewed.
“I know that Juan isn’t as long as you are, but I figured that if I can do a big one, the others should be easier. I don’t want to beg, but I will if I have to.”
I looked over to where Todd was doing the splits, and a pang of sadness stabbed me. A man like Todd was never going to want me. “Ok,” I said reluctantly. “But if I say ‘stop’, you stop. Agreed?”
“Of course.”
I looked toward the area where the gymnasts were working. Todd was walking on his hands with his legs stretched out in a perfect 180 degree line. “Do you know a place where we can go?”
“My granddad has a gas station on Pine and 4th. There’s a room in the back that I do my homework in. I can lock it.”
I nodded.
“We can go now, if you want.”
“OK. You go first,” I said. “I’ll meet you down the block.”
John got up. “Thanks for saying yes.” He stepped down one level and headed out. I looked down as Todd finished his pommel horse routine. He dismounted perfectly and then looked up directly at me. I wasn’t sure, but I thought he gave me a little head nod. I smiled. He turned and walked over to his coach; if he had only turned and looked at me again, I would know that he had noticed me. But he didn’t.
I hurried out of school to catch up with John. That brief interaction with Todd, OK, it wasn’t really an interaction, but Todd’s head nod made my cock twitch, and now I was horny. If John were really good, I could close my eyes and pretend that Todd was the one on his knees. I saw John in the distance and caught up with him. “If anyone asks us what we’re doing,” I said, “we’re discussing Mary Shelley for lit class.”
“Mary Shelley?” he asked.
“Yeah, the chick that wrote Frankenstein. I’m thinking about writing my research paper for English on it.”
“No one’s going to talk to us. No one ever comes up to talk to me,” said John.
Just as he said that, three girls and a guy I thought was Gary something stopped to chat with us. They chatted about the garden club and how they needed helpers with the school's flower beds. “John and I are pretty busy with the CS League,” I told them. “Are you posting the days you need help in the cafeteria for people who may be able to help for just one or two days?”
“That’s a great idea,” said Gary. “Why don’t I hook up with you at lunch tomorrow and you can let me know if you’ve got some others.”
“Sure,” I said. In my current state of horniness, I wondered whether he might have chosen the words ‘hook up’ on purpose. I decided to think about it later, when he found me at lunch. “See you later,” I said so John and I could get back on the way to John’s grandfather’s gas station.
I started to worry that it would sound suspicious to say that we had to hurry off to discuss Frankenstein. I was glad that I hadn’t mentioned it. Once they were gone and we were on our way again, John looked over at me. “Fuck, no one ever talks to me, but everyone talks to you. What’s it like being so popular?”
“Oh, you know,” I said, “girls inviting you to parties and dinner, asking me to father their children, guys who want me to go fishing or to suck my dick. It’s a never ending party.”
“You’re making fun of me.”
“Not intentionally, John. I don’t feel popular. Look, people want to talk to me because I’m more handsome than the average guy. But that won’t last forever. I’ve got muscles that I didn’t have to work for, and the muscles sometimes draw people to me. Listen, though, I’m not my muscles or my face. There’s a me inside here, and that’s not why people want to talk to me or be my friend.”
“I guess we all have things we have to deal with.”
I repeated what he said. “We’ve all got things we have to deal with. You’ve got your Juan, and I have my Todd.”
“But at least I’ve realized it’s one-sided,” he announced with certitude.
“So, if he walked up to you and asked you to run away with him because he was tired of hiding his true self, you wouldn’t go with him.”
“He’s not going to do that.”
“Maybe not, but you’re kidding yourself if you think you wouldn’t entertain the idea of being with him.”
“A guy can dream, but that’s all it is,” John said.
“Is it? Or is it a hope that we cling to in order to keep going?”
John’s face became pensive. “Is that what I’m doing?”
“It’s what I’m doing. Look, an hour ago, we’d never spoken. Now, we’re becoming friends. We’re about to go have some fun while we wait for love.”
“Waiting for something that will never get here.”
“Maybe not, but there’s that hope again.”
Juan gave a little laugh. “Maybe some of your optimism will rub off on my. Anyway, we’re here; let’s cross the street.”
The two of us walked as nonchalantly as two guys who are about to have a sexual encounter with each other can possibly walk. I was afraid to look in a mirror and see the look of guilt on my face, even though half of my brain told me that there was nothing to feel guilty for. We went to the back of the building, and John unlocked the door to a small room with a cot, a desk, a toilet, and a shower with a torn curtain. Everything was clean, but obviously worn and old. The sink was stained, and the blanket on the bed had seen better days. I saw another door that I assumed led to the front of the building.
“Now that we’re here, I’m kind of nervous,” he chuckled.
“No need to be,” I tried to be reassuring; although, I was feeling nervous, too. “What I said outside, it was true. We’re friends who are here to have a good time and some fun.”
“I’m OK,” he replied.
I bent my head down to kiss him. It seemed like the thing to do, and I’d never kissed a guy and wanted to know what it was like.”
He looked up and into my eyes. “You want to make out first?”
“Well, we are here to practice.” I smiled.
He smiled back. He stretched up slightly, and I bent down a little more. Our lips touched, and I felt a tingling sensation. “Shit, JD, that made me hard.”
“It is nice, isn’t it,” I smiled, and then I kissed him again, a little more forcefully this time. My tongue brushed across his lips. He moaned and moved against me.
One hand cupped his ass as I pulled him up; the other wrapped around the back of his head. I opened my mouth and licked his upper lip. His knees seemed to go out from under him. I moved him around with me as I turned to face the cot. I put him down on it and then covered him with my body. I continued to kiss him as I spread his legs apart and got between them. I moved my hips back and forth and rubbed our crotches together.
John gasped. “You’re going to make me come in my pants. Fuck but that’s awesome.”
I rolled next to him on the narrow cot and pulled him close to me. “I’m glad you liked it. You’re right; it felt awesome.”
“We came here so I could suck your dick, but the extras sure are nice,” he giggled a little. He twisted slightly and swung his feet to the floor. It was his turn to get between my legs. He unzipped me and pulled my pants and underwear down. It felt awkward.
“Listen, John, why don’t I just pull them off first. In fact, I think I’ll take all of my clothes off.”
“So I get to see you naked, JD. All of you?”
“That’s right,” I said. “And you can touch any part, but you have to take all of yours off, too.”
“You want to see me naked.”
“Fuck yeah, I want to see you naked. You’re a sexy fucker. Take them off.” I grabbed his shirt.
“I’ll do it.” He began to slowly strip while humming a stripper tune.
John was soon standing in front of me, naked, his erection pointing up. His ball sack was loose, and I wrapped my fingers around it.
“Hey, John. This is my first time with a guy. Thanks.” I sat on the bed and pulled him close and sucked on his nipple. I’d wanted to suck on a nipple for several years, and as I did, his cock bounced up and down.
“Lay down,” he insisted, and I did. He got back on the bed between my legs and bent forward, taking the first three inches of my dick into his mouth. His mouth was wet and warm. His tongue massaged my cock. There was no chewing. His fingers grasped the base of my shaft, and he was able to get four inches into his oral cavity before the head of my rod hit the back of his mouth. He flinched slightly and then tried to force my dick into his throat. The head of my cock popped past the barrier and went into softer tissue. He pulled back. Precum stretched from his lips to the tip of my piss slit.
“Wow,” was all he said before he went back to sucking me. While he only got the head of my cock into his throat twice, the sensation of his tongue and lips moving up and down my shaft was incredible.
“Holy fuck,” I grunted. I could tell that my balls were getting ready to empty themselves. “I’m gonna come, John, I can feel it building.”
“Mmmm.” He didn’t release his grasp on my boner, which was raging hard now.
“I mean it,” I tried to say between large gulps of air. “I’m close. I…” My hands turned into balled fists, and I shot my load into John’s mouth. Only twice, but I had jerked off in the bathroom during fifth period.
John wrapped his lips around my dick and swallowed some of my seed before sitting back and laughing. “I loved it.” He wiped his mouth and chin with the back of his hand.
“You were great,” I told him as I sat up.
We locked eyes, and he leaned forward and kissed me. There was the slight taste of my cum on his tongue, and perhaps that’s what set me off, but I kissed him back hard and pushed him back on the bed. I wanted to suck him, and I could think of nothing else. His dick slipped easily between my lips; the tip reached the back of my mouth just as my nose was buried in his pubic hair. I moved my tongue up and down his shaft while keeping his entire shaft in my mouth. I felt it twitch, and cum flooded into my mouth. I swallowed as he had done; the creamy, slightly salty seed reminded me of custard. I sat back on my bottom and licked my lips.
John propped himself on his elbows. “Man, I wasn’t expecting that. I didn’t mean to come so fast or I would have warned you.”
“Your dick warned me, dude. That was fun,” I told him.
“You’re a great guy, JD. You didn’t have to blow me, you know.”
“I wanted to.” You’re a great guy, too. I hope you get Juan. You deserve it.”
“Well, until then. Maybe we can do this a few more times.” He grinned, and his full lips exposed a nice looking smile.
“I should go,” I said. I leaned forward and kissed him, long, deep, and passionately. “Thanks for a great afternoon.” I dressed, and before I left, John stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my torso. With his head resting against my spine, I heard him whisper, “Thank you.”
As I walked home, my brain began to wonder whether there were a way for me to find out more about Juan. Maybe, if he were gay and just hiding it from the rest of us the way we were hiding it from him and the rest of the world, I could get the two of them together. I needed a plan.
And if it turned out that Juan was straight, maybe I could help John find someone else to love.
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