Discipline and Display
Narrator: Toby
His punishment paddle still hangs in full view on the wall of our living room. Instinctively I place a hand over my butt, thinking back to the day he put it up there.
Florian notices where I’m looking and comes to stand beside me.
"I really put you through it sometimes, didn’t I?"
"Yeah."
"You must’ve hated me at times."
“I could never hate you, Florian.”
He sinks down onto the sofa and gestures for me to sit beside him. “It’s probably time to tell you why I was so strict with you.”
“Wasn’t that just part of your role as Supervisor? You had to keep me in check because of my sentence. But, um…” I hesitate for a moment, then decide to speak my mind. “Sometimes you really humiliated me. Why did you do that? Weren’t the slaps enough?”
He takes my hand. “It was important for the City to see how firmly I was dealing with you. Some of the patricians thought you’d got off too lightly with your custodial sentence.”
“What do you mean? Were they hoping it would fail?”
“Yes. A few wealthy patricians you once stole from. If they’d had their way, the City would’ve taken you away from me. I couldn’t let that happen. That’s why I had to stay strict.”
I let his words sink in. Every smack, every punishment – not to put me down, but to protect me.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me that?”
“You already had more than enough to deal with. I thought it was more important that you felt safe here.”
He kisses me gently on the lips. “That’s all in the past now. No one can take you away anymore. We don’t have to keep that paddle up there, you know.”
“Leave it. That paddle kept me out of prison. And it’s become a familiar part of the décor.”
He gives me a playful nudge on the arm. “Didn’t realize you’d grown so attached to it.”
“I wouldn’t go that far.” I rub my behind with exaggerated flair.
Florian gets up and pulls me to my feet, laughing. “Come on, we’ve got shopping to do. There’s still loads to get for your party tonight.”
The party’s for me - because today, my custodial sentence officially comes to an end.
We walk out to the car together. Florian has kept me going all these years - more than I ever realized. No, no one’s ever taking me away from my prince.
****
Florian parks the car, loaded with food and drinks, at the entrance to the Peel Bastion. At the edge of the terrace, I spot Pamela with an olive-skinned guy who looks oddly familiar - and nervous.
Pamela and I stayed in touch. She wasn’t held accountable for the Holy Boys’ crimes and now lives in a new apartment in our district.
Suddenly, I recognize the boy beside her. “Jimmy!” I call out, running up to them. “Man, it’s so good to see you again, healthy and alive!”
“Hey Toby, buddy.” He grins and shakes my hand, then we slap a high five before hugging tight, a bit overwhelmed.
Florian joins us. “Well, Toby,” he says cheerfully, “who’s this fine young man?”
“This is Jimmy,” I blurt out - but then I see Jimmy’s face. He looks flustered. And I get it. I freeze up.
It’s Florian who saves the moment. He wraps an arm around me and looks at him. “Toby told me about a boy named Jimmy. A real friend, back when he had no one else. Would that have been you?”
Jimmy stammers. “I… uh…”
“Yeah,” I say quietly. “That was Jimmy. A real friend.”
“Well, in that case, I’m very glad to meet you, Jimmy. I’m Florian.”
The former Holy Boys gang member shakes Florian’s hand a little hesitantly. His smile is tight, and he doesn’t quite meet Florian’s eyes.
My prince speaks in his calm, level voice. “You know, if there’s one thing Toby has taught me, it’s that everyone deserves a second chance.”
Gratefully, I tighten my arm around his waist. “You can trust him,” I tell Jimmy. “He’s alright. Not like most of those stuck-up City assholes.”
Florian raises an eyebrow. “Excuse me, Toby?”
“What? It’s true.”
I glance at him, a little sheepish, but he just chuckles. Jimmy seems to relax a little.
I give Jimmy a friendly slap on the shoulder. “Man, I’ve thought about you so many times! Where’ve you been all these years?”
Pamela answers for him. “He was hiding out in a village near Cologne. I ran into him at a market, stocking up on food.” A bit accusingly, she adds, “It took some serious effort to convince him it was safe to come back.”
“Do you have a place to stay?” I ask Jimmy.
“He’s crashing with me for now,” Pamela says. “Maybe later he can, um…”
I look at Florian. “We can find something for him, right? I mean, we’re building so much right now.” And to Jimmy: “There’ll be room here for twenty thousand Outsiders. That’s twice what we originally planned.”
Florian nods. “That’s thanks in part to some brilliant ideas from Toby. And, of course, the generous subsidies from the very same City you folks love to hate.” He winks. “Yeah Toby, I’m sure we can sort out a little flat for your friend.” He jerks a thumb over his shoulder. “I’ll unload the groceries. You go catch up with your friends.”
He extends a hand to Jimmy. “Will we see you at the party later?”
Jimmy hesitates. “I’m not sure… Won’t there be a bunch of City bigshots there?”
“A few, yeah. This project”, he gestures at me, “is a success story they’re proud to celebrate.”
“Then I think I’ll skip it. Sorry, Toby…”
“Don’t worry about it,” I say. “Totally get it.” And to Pamela: “You’ll come, though?”
“What do you think? I rushed all the way back just to be here for your big night. Jimmy’ll just have to entertain himself if he’s staying behind.”
Florian waves. “Take care, Jimmy. Hope to see you again soon.”
I watch him walk back to the car.
“He’s amazing,” Pamela says. “You’re really lucky, Toby.”
A warm, proud feeling floods through me. “Yeah, I know. He’s the best.”
“Pamela said you’ve been together for four years?” Jimmy asks. “And that he’s not just your boyfriend but also your Supervisor from the City?”
“Yeah, it was weird at first. But he made it work - it just became part of us.”
“But now he’s not your Supervisor anymore,” Jimmy says thoughtfully.
“That’s right. My sentence is over. So?”
“Nothing. Just… well, it’s good he’s still with you. That doesn’t happen often. In my experience, people always walk out on you eventually. But maybe he’s different.”
Pamela punches him in the arm. “We don’t walk out on each other. Got it?”
“I walked out on you guys. Back then, when I…”
“Cut it out,” Pamela snaps. “Or I’ll give you a serious spanking!”
Jimmy throws up a hand in mock alarm, pulling a fake-scared face. “Okay, okay, I’ll shut up.”
The three of us stroll into the new district - best friends, bound by a shared and tangled past. Jimmy seems a lot more at ease now that we’re just Outsiders among ourselves. The mood is light and relaxed.
Still, that old knot in my stomach tightens - silly, but it’s never really gone.
In a conspiratorial tone, Jimmy says, “Pamela told me there are a couple of nice bars around here now. How about grabbing a beer sometime this week?”
“Sure,” I say lightly. “Let’s do that.”
I keep my smile in place, but my thoughts are already miles away - where the rules live, where the limits are, and where the hand that keeps me steady waits.
****
It was ten months after I’d started my placement at the Peel Bastion. Florian and Fabian had travelled with a delegation from New Rotterdam to Antwerp, where the City Council had taken a keen interest in our project. That left Mike and me with the place to ourselves. We decided to throw a little party, and things got way too cheerful that evening.
Why I drank so much, I couldn’t really say. Maybe I just wanted to let go for a night, now that Florian wasn’t there to keep an eye on me. Maybe I didn’t want to look like a wimp in front of Mike, who was just as tipsy as I was. Or maybe I wanted to drown out that nagging thought that I didn’t really deserve this life.
Whatever the reason, I woke up the next morning with a crushing hangover. Mike had crashed on the sofa next to me. He jolted awake when he heard me retching loudly into the toilet. Everything was spinning, and my stomach wouldn’t stop lurching.
Mike fetched a bucket from the kitchen and placed it beside my bed. “Use this if you need to be sick again. That way you won’t have to run to the bathroom every time.” One look at his face told me how rough I must’ve appeared.
“Thanks,” I managed. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.” A second later, the final remains of last night’s dinner came up. I just about grabbed the bucket in time.
Mike barely left my side until Florian and Fabian came home a few hours later. They knew straight away what had happened. Mike had tried to tidy away the bottles and glasses as best he could, but the stench of booze hung unmistakably in the air.
Florian sat down on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling, buddy?”
Meanwhile, Fabian turned on Mike. “We left Toby in your care. You were supposed to look after him. You call this looking after him? Getting wasted together?”
In a croaky voice I said, “Mike’s not to blame. I drank it all myself.”
Fabian looked at me. “I appreciate you sticking up for him, but he needs to take his responsibilities more seriously.” Then to Mike: “Come on. We’ll talk about it at home.”
Fabian and Mike left the room, and I sank back into bed.
Florian boiled a kettle and soon placed a warm cup of tea beside me. “Try to drink some if you can. It’s important you don’t get dehydrated.”
The steam carried a whiff of mint, but just the thought of it made my stomach turn.
Florian sat on the edge of the bed, hands on his knees, shoulders too tense. His eyes darted across my face, my hands, as if searching for something to hold on to, something to make sense of what had happened. But there was nothing to figure out. I’d done this to myself.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“We’ll get to that,” Florian said softly.
His words barely registered.
After what felt like forever, my body finally began to recover. The room stopped spinning, and my stomach started to settle.
Then came a timid knock at the door. Florian glanced at me one more time, then left the bedroom to answer it.
I recognized Mike’s voice. He sounded shaken, like something had completely drained him. “Fabian wants me to show you something.”
“All right,” said Florian. “Come on in.”
Mike followed him into the bedroom, where I was still lying in bed, worn out and drained. He stood there, staring at nothing, avoiding eye contact.
With a sigh, he turned around and dropped his jeans. His buttocks were a blazing red.
Florian placed a hand gently on the punished skin of my fellow offender. Then he stepped back so I could get a good look too. In the same tone he might’ve used to comment on the weather, Florian said, “All right Mike, thanks.”
Mike pulled up his pants and fled the room.
The image of Mike’s bare, punished butt kept playing in my mind, along with a single, overwhelming thought: this was my fault. “He didn’t do anything wrong,” I said hoarsely. “That spanking should’ve been mine.”
“Oh, don’t worry,” Florian said, his voice low and dark. “You’ll get yours too.”
My breath caught. This was different from any other time I’d been punished. This time, I had really messed up - not just in the eyes of the City, but in Florian’s eyes too. And that hurt more than any punishment ever could.
But… he was still here. He hadn’t walked away.
****
The next day, my hangover was gone - but Florian’s promise hung heavy in the air.
That afternoon, once he was sure I’d fully recovered, he took me to his study. He opened a desk drawer and pulled out a worn piece of wood. I recognized it at once: it was the old punishment paddle from his police days.
“I’d hoped never to use this on you again, Toby.” The words hit me like a knife to the chest.
Florian sat down on a chair at the edge of the room. His gaze swept over me, heavy as a touch.
“We’re going to deal with this thoroughly, so you don’t repeat that kind of behavior. Strip.”
With a knot in my stomach, I obeyed. Florian followed my every movement. As I took off my clothes, I could feel the blood rising in my face - not just from embarrassment, but from something else too. A strange kind of certainty. Whatever he was about to do to me, I knew he was still on my side.
Last of all, I placed my briefs on top of the other clothes and stood there - naked, vulnerable. But not abandoned. Not by him.
He motioned for me to lie across his lap. I met his gaze. It was gentle, but firm. There was no escape. I lowered myself into position, my bare bottom exposed to the punishment I’d been promised.
In a calm voice, he said, “I’m sorry, Toby, but I have to do this. You missed a working day, and it was your own fault. As your Supervisor, it’s my duty to discipline you.”
Just like before, he made me wait for the first blow. My breathing quickened. This was serious.
The paddle landed with a heavy thud, sending a sharp jolt of pain through my butt - pain I hadn’t felt in a long time. I groaned softly and clung to the seat of the chair. Florian brought the paddle down rhythmically, making sure every swat counted. The blows seared into my flesh, brutal, unrelenting.
Then, all of a sudden, a loud crack rang out as the paddle hit me yet again. Florian muttered a curse under his breath.
He pulled me upright and I stood in front of him. His fingers traced along a large split in the wood. A few splinters had come loose. He looked at me, startled.
“Let me see your bottom.”
I turned around and he gently ran his fingers across my cheeks.
“You’re fine,” he said, the relief clear in his voice. “But I’m not using that paddle again.”
For a moment, I hoped he might call it a day. No such luck.
After a pause, he said, “There’s a cheese board in the kitchen with a handle. That should do the job. Go and fetch it, and don’t take your time. I’m not finished with you yet.”
His face was back to that uncompromising look. With a sigh, I reached for my clothes.
“Hands off! I didn’t say you could get dressed.”
I stared at him in disbelief. He meant it. He was sending me out into the corridor butt naked.
My heart thudded in my throat as I hurried down the hallway. Right next to the kitchen were the guest rooms, where a few City Architects were staying to help with the project. If any of them stepped into the corridor now, I’d be completely exposed.
Thankfully, I made it to the kitchen unseen. I took the board from the wall - and forgot where I was for a moment. I stood there too long, mesmerized by the solid weight of the wood in my hands.
Suddenly, the door swung open and one of the architects entered, a young man in the flamboyant dress of a patrician.
And there I was. Completely naked.
Oh man, please stop staring at me like that.
His eyes went straight to the marks on my butt, and it clicked.
“Well,” he said with a smirk, “looks like your Supervisor’s really pissed off. That for round two?” He nodded at the board in my hand.
“Yes,” I said shortly. Prick.
“Best of luck, then.”
I bolted from the kitchen. I could practically feel his eyes burning into my ass. No doubt he’d share the tale with all his rich, powerful friends. Why was Florian putting me through this humiliation?
Back in our wing, I handed Florian the board. Without a word, he pulled me back over his lap. The new paddle came down hard, again and again. My unprotected skin burned as the fire lit up across my ass.
At last, he stopped. He let me up and walked out. I was left alone, hands on my stinging cheeks, not knowing what to do with myself.
From the next room came the sound of a hammer tapping against a wall. I quickly got dressed. When I walked in, Florian was just finishing putting up his new paddle.
I stared at it. Wanted to say something. Thought better of it. And slumped down on the sofa in silence.
Florian came to sit beside me and placed a hand on my knee. “We’ll talk tonight,” he said. “But this isn’t over yet.”
****
My punishment was far from over. The City took matters like this very seriously, and so did my Supervisor. Over the next week, I was spanked every evening, once for each working hour I’d missed. Just as the sting from the previous day would begin to fade, Florian would lead me back to his study for the next round. The result? A bottom that stayed sore for eight days straight.
After the final spanking, Florian suddenly grabbed me by the arm and marched me down the corridor, still butt naked. Without a word, he took me back to the communal kitchen, where two City Architects were in the middle of their evening meal. One of them was the same guy who’d caught me the week before. They both looked up, surprised.
Florian paid them no attention. He took a cloth from the cupboard and held it under the tap. Then he gently dabbed my burning red butt. The architects stared at us, mouths slightly open, too stunned to speak.
“Well, kid,” Florian said, “I think you’ve learned your lesson this week.” Then, casually, to our guests: “He’s had a spanking every day for the past eight days, for neglecting his duties to the City.”
I felt my face flush, but the architects nodded approvingly. “Good work, Supervisor.”
“Enjoy your meal, and sorry for the disturbance,” said Florian, and led me by the arm back to our own quarters. Once we were inside, his manner changed.
“All right, Toby. That’s it. You’ll be feeling it for a while yet, but the worst is over.”
“You knew they’d be in there,” I said accusingly.
“Of course. They always eat at that time. The City has a right to see how I’m handling you. But it’s done now. I say we leave it behind us.”
“Gladly.” All I wanted was for things to go back to normal.
“Good. I’m in the mood for a beer. How about you?”
“Am I allowed to drink again?”
“You are – under supervision, of course.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but he raised his hand.
“Non-negotiable.”
With a sigh, I started to get dressed, while Florian went to fetch the beers from our fridge.
****
Florian is busy in the function hall, arranging tables and chairs, his eyes focused as he fine-tunes the layout.
My heart skips a beat as I walk over to him. The question I’ve been holding back burns on my tongue. I have no idea how he’ll react. But I have to ask. Now. Here.
“Florian.”
He hears the tension in my voice. His beautiful, sparkling blue eyes sweep over me, assessing. “What is it, buddy?”
“Pamela and Jimmy want to go for drinks with me this week. At the Outside Bar.”
“Ah. So the three of you want to grab a beer there?”
“Basically, yes.”
He pauses. “You remember how many drinks you're allowed?”
“Yes, Florian, I know.” The irritation in my voice is hard to miss.
Florian pretends not to notice. “Do you think you’ll stick to your limit even if I’m not there?”
“Oh come on,” I burst out. “It’s been nearly three years since I got that sick from drinking. Are you planning to punish me for that forever?”
He answers calmly, “As of today, you're a free man. My role as your Supervisor is over. You're completely free to make your own decisions now.”
To my own surprise, that thought makes me flinch. Why do I suddenly feel so unsure of myself?
“Aren’t I still your property?” I ask, almost pleading.
His fingers stroke the back of my neck. “As your owner, I’m allowed to worry about you a little, aren’t I?”
“Yes.” My voice trembles. I wish I’d never brought it up.
He asks again, gently but firmly, “Do you think you’ll be able to stick to your limit?”
“Yes. Absolutely. I promise.”
“Don’t promise. Just do it.”
He smiles when he sees me nodding vigorously.
“All right, Toby. I once asked you to trust me. Now it’s time I start trusting you. Go on, then. I hope you have a great evening.”
Panic gives way to relief. He isn’t pushing me away, he’s just worried about me.
On impulse, I kiss him full on the mouth and press my tongue against his. A burst of intense passion… Then he laughs and gives me a playful shove on the chest.
“Go on then, tell them the good news.”
Almost floating, I make my way over to where my two mates from the Outside are waiting for me.
****
The evening sun bathes the streets in deep orange. Pamela has already gone back to the Peel Bastion - she’s meeting up with a friend there.
I unfold the map of the new district and point out the spot to Jimmy. “This is the Outside Bar, where we’ll grab that beer on Thursday. They’re open tonight too. Good food, great view of the district.”
Jimmy hesitates. “I like the idea, but… you know, I’m just some broke Outsider. I can swing a beer, but a whole meal? I’d rather grab something cheap.”
“Ah, that was dumb of me. Didn’t even think about that. I sound like one of those stuck-up City boys.” I dig into my wallet and press some money into his hand. “Here. You can borrow it.”
He looks startled. “Where’d you get that? Don’t tell me you’re back to stealing again?”
“Florian gave it to me. An advance on my first paycheck. He says I’m a free man now, and I deserve money of my own.”
“But that’s your money. I can’t take that. Really…”
“Take it. I’ve got more than enough. The Bastion’s been feeding me for years. Just keep it, okay? I don’t want you chewing on a soggy snack while I’m off partying. You were my only real friend in the Holy Boys. I’m gonna help you find your feet here. Now get moving to the Outside Bar or I’ll drag you with me to the Bastion.”
Jimmy sighs. “Alright, have it your way.” Then he smiles, really smiles. Warm and genuine. “Thanks, man. You’re amazing. Not sure what I ever did to deserve a friend like you.”
We hug, then part ways. I watch him go, still looking a little awkward, like he hasn’t quite figured out how to move through this place yet.
Slowly I stroll back toward the Bastion. Seeing Jimmy again makes me feel oddly grounded. I’m looking forward to showing him around, making sure he feels just as welcome here as I did.
But at the same time, something starts gnawing at me. I can’t shake it.
It’s nothing, I tell myself. Don’t be stupid. Everything’s fine.
Still… it won’t let go.
