Gay Bubble Butt Blog

On a trip to New Zealand, Aussie amateur Bentley Race met up with this cute Indonesian guy named Vino Rainz. He spotted Vino when cruising for local guys on an app. He is talked into coming over to the hotel for a photoshoot. He's pretty damn cute, and the 22 year old seems to really enjoy taking his clothes off to show his super-cute bubble butt and smooth, dark skin. He's pretty much up for doing anything!

Are these guys as super smooth as their super smooth bodies? Super suave? Super seductive? Super market?

Strike market. I'm in the middle of making dinner right now.

And for dinner, I would prefer to sip aperitif while gazing lustfully and wistfully at these fellas.

Maybe if I stare long enough, one of the will tell me what aperitif means.

Hey, don't you want the guy you're with to have your idea of a dream body? Like you see him with clothes on, and are hoping when you unwrap the present that is him, that you won't want to return him.

For some a dream body is a big, old bear. I don't mean big ol' I mean old as in actually old. And for others a dream body is not caring about the guy's body but just wanting to play with his used underwear. So that's sort of a negative space situation. Clothes without the body. 

Attraction is complicated.

And out of focus but still worth it. Because there's nothing that says genuine spy pic than a blurry locker room shot. So wrong. And so worth it. Like watching a horrible reality TV show. 

Now why isn't there a show about locker room peepers and the men who try to avoid them and fail? It could be called The Real Peepers of Random Men's Locker Rooms of Beverly Hills and Other Places. Or just Check Out His Ass! Yeah, the latter would probably get higher ratings.

Time to get in all your last minute peeping before the new year. Because peepable men will cease to exist in 2016. Very shortly, the most a man will enable to be seen is his bare ankle. We're headed back to Victorian times. So register www.HotNakedAnkleMen.com now! Because if you wait too long, all that will be left is www.HotNakedAnkleMen.biz and nobody goes to a .biz, certainly not to masturbate.

Though masturbation will be a problem since only ankle nudity will be allowed, even when alone. Good luck finding your ankle's g-spot. Foot fetishists won't even get to see their own bare feet. That's the tragic world we'll all live in.

I can't even imagine what guys are going to work out in, or play on the beach in, or shop in hot weather in. But not this stuff. We're entering the dark ages of male nudity, folks.

I have so many opening lines, like "I bet guys line up for your opening" or "I bet guys line up for your openings." The latter is for guys who have cute mouths and buttholes, rather than just cute of one. It's wonderful I have detailed, technical knowledge of male biology to understand the relevance of singular vs. plural.

Converting a peeping situation into an opening line is fraught with risk. It's not often the surreptitious pic snapper makes themself obvious. It's like being a spy with a t-shirt that says "I'm a spy." Although no actual spy would wear that shirt so it would throw people off.

The more pixels the better! Thank you, inventors of the retina display, for cramming more man flesh into my vision. Not that I have the sharp vision that could even tell the difference (sorry Apple). But more pixels equals more man so bravo.

And here's to semi-violations of privacy that allow moments of voyeurism to be documented. That moment where someone says "See that ass? I'm going to capture that ass with my portable pixel generating machine." And it's a genius machine that can cram a bubble butt into a jpg. Technology has come so far.

The lining up of the angles in the top four photos is sort of a coincidence but what isn't a coincidence is the guys have something in common otherwise. I'll give you a hint. It rhymes with stealthy but is not stealthy at all. It's rather exposed actually. At what point will cell phone makers start advertising the camera functionality with nudes? It would be so much more honest.

"You've got a hot fucking body" is right up there as a pick-up line. Not necessarily if you're looking for a long-term relationship though. That would be more like "You've got an amazing personality and I want to spend time with you for years and your body is good enough to get through sex with you sometimes if neither of us are too tired or have made some other excuse to not have to do it."

Though if you can score a long-term relationship with a guy who has a hot fucking body, then congratulations and fuck you to hell.

19 year old Justin Evans from Poland has already been on the site when Bentley Race was travelling Europe a couple of years back with his mate Zac. Bentley is back in Europe and organised to meet Justin Evans for another hot scene. Awesome! This time around, Justin is looking a lot more buff, and that ass is particularly more of a bubble. Justin shows off in and out of his sports gear, working it for Bentley's camera.

More Bentley Race playing and filming his mates!

Is there anything i can do about my flat ass? It looks terrible in jeans, even though I think I've got a nice bottom when I'm naked. It just doesn't fill any pants I wear right.

-Two Dimensional Tuches

I can totally help! You're so lucky you reached out to me! I will save you from your misery!

Know that saying "Accentuate the positive. Eliminate the negative." That's from a song, actually. And definitely not a Rihanna song. She doesn't sing songs. She sings money.

Yellow means pee and yellow means caution. Such as: "Someone is going to pee on you! Caution!" And now, yellow also means ass. Neon yellow. Mustard yellow. Canary yellow. And the ultimate: ass yellow. Because it's like a traffic signal blinking at you. Ass! Ass! Ass!

I highly recommend jumping on the trend. And if you don't think you look good in yellow, then that's great, wear it anyway. More people should wear things they don't think they look good in. We all need a fucking break from trying to look good all the time.

Among all the voyeuristic joys available in locker rooms, jock ass is in the top two. If you count each cheek as a number, then ass is number two and three. So what else is on the list?

Number one is dick. Or technically number one is the phone number of the guy with the dick you want, but that requires conversation, not pure voyeurism. Then we have ass and ass. Followed by chest, feet, foreskin, jockstraps, pissing, sucking, ejaculation and now I've lost track because the locker room has devolved into a fucking orgy. Or at least the hope of that is what goes through my mind whenever I'm in a locker room.

Want dick. Need dick. Get dick. Repeat. The same suggested method applies to ass. Damn, there are so many hot men to sneak peeks at. Is that what the third eye is for? Sure, the third eye is probably this mystical concept for non-literal perception, but when it's not busy non-literally perceiving, can it spare some visual data processing power to spy on more hot guys? Who do I ask to make that happen?

Maybe I've had dick on the brain, but I just got that Chaturbate is a play on Chat and Masturbate. Despite the hoards of naked guys chatting and masturbating on Chaturbate (both show-offs and watchers), I'd thought it was a site about guys from Chattanooga who ate a lot while wearing turbans. Which I'm totally still right about that, except all those guys from Chattanooga are also masturbating.