Fire On All Cylinders
Ivan was different tonight. He was quiet, concentrating a bit too much, thinking about the day I assumed and not saying much. He seemed lost in his own heavy, thoughtful silence. The kind that needed to be broken with care.
I sat down at the kitchen table in a fresh tee and my striped pajama pants, picturing him fucking me on it just last night. I had grabbed a quick shower, carefully soaping up my ass, feeling much more relaxed and at ease than I did this morning. Ivan had cooked dinner and cleaned up the entire kitchen while I was showering. Now he moved around the kitchen like a caged bear, making coffee he didn’t seem to want. The confident giant from the garage was gone, replaced by the man I’d seen sitting in the dark, waiting for his world to fall apart.
He set two mugs on the table with a solid THUNK and finally sat, his big hands wrapped around his cup. He wouldn’t look at me.
“They know,” he said, the words flat and final. “Or they’re gonna figure it out before I say something. Smitty’s not stupid.”
I reached across the table and covered one of his hands with mine. “Hey.”
He dragged his gaze up. The fear in his grey eyes seemed like an embarrassment to him, like he was trying to hide it from me. It actually made me ache for him, my heart pounding in my chest as I gripped his big hand.
“Okay,” I said, keeping my voice calm. “So, let’s talk about it. Together. If you’re serious and you want to do something about it, what are our options?”
He sat back, and took a shaky breath. “We keep lying. I find another Stacy. Or Tracy. And tell them about this other woman I’m seeing.” He gave me a wry smile. Even in this instance I was glad to see he still found humour for me. “You… I don’t know. You find a girlfriend?” He said it like he was suggesting we drink poison.
“That’s option one: The Prison,” I said, giving his hand a squeeze. “Been there, done that. It sucks. And I think we’re past that. So then, what’s option two?”
He was quiet for a long moment, that big oaf looking like he was trying to do calculus again. “We finally tell them about us?” He whispered it, like it was a blasphemy, phrasing it like a question as if he was testing me.
“Option two: The Grenade,” I nodded. “We do that, and…what? Do you think the garage might not survive? Think Smitty might walk, given his thoughts on the whole gay idea? Is that what you’re afraid of? What about Big Ray then? You think he’ll leave just because you told him you like men? We don’t know any of that Ivan.” I gave him a hopeful smile. “Who knows, maybe Ray is into guys after all and will drop the hint for a threesome?!” I shrugged, giving Ivan my best shocked face. “They could accept it and be okay with it all, or it could tear the whole place apart.” I laid it out, not to scare him, but because we had to be realistic. This was his father’s legacy after all and I knew how much the garage meant to him.
“So…there’s no good answer then!” he said, his voice suddenly loud and thick with despair. “I could lose the shop, or I lose…” His eyes met mine, and he didn’t have to finish. Or I lose you. He thought those were the only two choices. He really truly believed that was really the only option here, even with me spelling it all out.
“Alright then, there’s a third option,” I said gently.
He frowned. “What?”
I gave another shrug. “We do nothing.”
He stared at me, confused. “But… you just said…”
“We do nothing different,” I clarified. “We don’t lie. We don’t make a big announcement. We just… be us. We stop trying so hard to hide. We let them see what they see. If Smitty has the guts to ask you point-blank, ‘Ivan, are you gay?’ then you can decide in that moment what to say. And something tells me you’d say it. You’re not a coward Ivan. You’re a fuckin’ beast! But we stop feeding the lies and the shame and the hiding. No more fake girlfriends. No more playing along with their jokes. And when they call me pretty boy, I own up to it maybe or start talking about my ex-boyfriend. I can admit it first if you want? I’m ready.”
I let the idea hang in the air. I saw the grimace on his face when I mentioned my ex. It was a middle path. It was terrifying in its own way—a slow, quiet unveiling instead of a single, dramatic moment.
“I think I’m ready too.” He admitted. “Today, I almost said it. First time I ever thought it. But I was afraid they’d turn on me.”
I squeezed his hand again. “Do you really think they’d be like that? I mean, how long have they worked there? They LOVE YOU for crying out loud. They respect you. They literally look up to you!”
He let it sink in, and I could see him smiling as he realized it. “They’ll still talk,” he said, but there was a flicker of hope in his eyes.
“Let them talk,” I said, a slow smile spreading on my face. “They’re already talking, they just are talking about the right sexual conquests! But if we’re not ashamed, their words lose their power. We just keep being the best damn mechanics in this town. We let our work speak for us. And we let whatever this is between us,” I gestured to him and back at myself, “speak for itself. Because at the end of the day it’s nobody’s business who we fuck outside of work. The world has changed since we were teenagers Ivan. We don’t have to hide anymore. And honestly Ivan…. With you, I feel invincible.”
He was silent, processing. The weight on his shoulders seemed to lighten just a fraction.
“I don’t want to hide anymore.” I said quietly, seeing his big grey eyes look up at me in contemplation. “I was given the chance with Bill, to hide away and be his dirty little secret again, and I just couldn’t do it. I don’t want to do it. I have YOU! I want US to be okay, and to not care what anyone thinks, or worry about what anyone thinks.”
He looked at me carefully for a moment, the big lug just sitting there looking so damn sexy as he got lost in thought, before he gave me a wry smile. “So we just… live?” he asked, as if it were a revolutionary concept.
“Yeah, Ivan,” I said, my heart so full it felt like it might burst. “We just live. In your house. In your garage. Together.”
He looked down at our hands, then back up at me. The fear wasn't gone, but it was being pushed out by something stronger. Something that looked a lot like courage.
“Okay,” he breathed out, a real, genuine smile finally touching his lips. “Okay. We just live. In our garage. And…in our house.”
He stood up, pulling me with him, and wrapped his arms around me in a hug that felt like home. He gave me a long sensual kiss, and I felt him hardening against me. He nuzzled his scratchy chin into my neck and kissed my ear. “My turn to shower.” Then he raised an eyebrow suddenly and gave a little laugh as his big hand gently patted my ass. “You still sore?”
I scrunched my face up and pushed him away. “Who said I was sore?”
He took a step back and grinned wide, his eyes narrowing, the lines around them wrinkling up as he pointed two fingers at me. “I saw the way you were moving today. Poor baby.”
“You really are a beast, Volkov.” I mumbled.
He stuck his tongue out as he moved away. “Join me in the shower and I’ll confirm it.”
“I’m staying away from you tonight Volkov!”
“We’ll see!” He yelled from around the corner, already heading to the bathroom.
I sat back down at the table and took the coffee he had made, sipping away as I listened to the sounds of the shower running. He was himself again. He was happy. We had a plan. It was messy and uncertain and scary as hell to me, but we were ready to face it. Together.
I took the coffee to the bedroom, and stripped naked before I got into bed. The shower was still running, and I flicked on his speaker, putting on some music. I propped up the pillows, adjusted the white sheet over my abs and grabbed the book I had started. I smiled suddenly, feeling completely comfortable in his bed, naked, waiting for him.
I think I had only read two pages when he appeared with a towel around his waist. We both sort of stopped short, him staring at my exposed upper body waiting for him in his bed, me taking in his physique in the towel. At 6’5” and 270 pounds of solid muscle, he didn’t just enter the bedroom, he seemed to fucking occupy it. The garage was big and Ivan just seemed to fit in naturally there. But here, in the confines of the bedroom, he suddenly seemed enormous to me. I felt my cock swell as I took in his broad frame, with that powerful chest and tree-trunk thighs. His arms hung down at his sides, the veins across his shoulders traced down over his bulging biceps to a pair of hands that were capable of once delivering knockout blows, now know every curve of my body. His short dark hair was showing off the flecks of grey, that seemed to match his eyes staring at me. He grinned, and simply pulled at the towel around his waist and I watched it drop to his big feet.
“Waiting for your big gay man?” He teased, moving to the bottom of the bed and reached for the sheets with both fists.
“Maybe.” I said, putting my book down as he started to tug at the covers, pulling them slowly towards him, revealing the bottom half of my abs, and then my entire nude body as my big cock appeared, already thick and hard for him.
“Oh? Naked are you? Does that mean…?” He gave me a pair of puppy dog eyes and pulled the covers right down off the bed to expose my feet. I braced myself as his hands went to my ankles, fearing he’d torture me again with the soles of my feet, but his hands simply glided up my blonde legs, as his own darker ones began to crawl up towards me.
He went right for my cock, his hot breath making me flex first, before his big fist took hold of it and I was swallowed up into his throat. I ran a hand through his wet head, tossing my book aside, and focused in on his eyes watching me as I breathed out in pleasure.
I lay back, closing my eyes at the feeling of him worshipping me, his naked backside on display for me as he lay around my legs, the hump of his ass teasing me as he gyrated himself into the bed beside my right knee, all while sucking my dick.
He came off it with a loud sigh, holding it up to admire it, letting his tongue lick the sides, while grinning up at me. “You really do have a beautiful cock.” He moaned, before nuzzling his mouth underneath, tonguing my balls, letting his tongue sink lower until I let out a gasp as he pushed my legs up and found my sensitive hole. “And I really do love cock.” He moaned. “But I love this hot ass even more!”
He kind of rolled me over, turning me sideways, moving my one leg up so he could get in there. I panted out heavily, allowing him access to feast, enjoying every fucking minute of his tongue, bathing me in his spit, until a finger began to dance around my entrance.
“I didn’t hurt you yesterday, did I?” he quietly asked, now sitting up around me, stroking his own cock with his other hand.
I shook my head and he moved his legs upwards, bringing his big thick dick to my face, offering it to me. I willingly accepted, reaching out to take the weight of it in my hand to guide it to my lips. The sound of him letting out a deep breath was all I wanted to hear after today’s heavy conversation. I wanted him to know I was here for him. Always.
I took him deep, making his dick glisten with my spit, watching him move away from my lips, spreading my cheeks carefully, spitting so much into my hole I knew he was afraid he was going to hurt me.
I nodded as he looked at me, slapping his big cock against my ass. “You sure?” He asked.
“Oh, I’m sure big guy.” I cooed back, turning myself sideways as he moved himself into position. He aimed into me, pushing gently, holding himself so still with my first intake of breath. I grabbed his hand and pulled him down around me, his body fitting around mine from behind like his big connecting rod fit perfectly into my tight crankshaft. He slid in slowly, allowing me time to stretch and breathe, but he didn’t cause any pain, like he had created exact oil clearance to allow for such smooth rotation. Fuck me, I was such a mechanic now.
I closed my eyes and gripped his hands, feeling warmth, and pleasure, and a fullness I never knew I was missing.
“Oh my God Ivan.” I breathed out as I felt his massive body surround me, his cock pushing all the way into my prostrate and setting off fireworks inside me. I clutched at his hand, bringing it up lips as he started to slowly pump in and out of me like a piston in a cylinder. We rocked together, for a long, slow time.
“I love you so much Troy.” I heard his voice in my ear as my breathing increased, along with our rhythm. He didn’t just hold me, he clung to me, his leg trapping mine, his hand holding my face, his mouth at my neck as we became one.
My body was on fire, and my cock was brushing against the sheets by his own movements inside me as he slowly pushed himself into me, deeper and deeper. He made love to me that night, after agreeing we were going to live our lives as who we truly were.
“God Ivan, I love you. You feel so fuckin’ amazing!” I moaned out as I dug my dick into the bed, feeling Ivan picking up the pace. My body started to shake and I knew my ass clenched around him, causing him to moan out in pleasure with me. “Oh my God, I’m going to shoot. Cum with me!”
It was like he was holding back for the right moment, and he suddenly shuddered and gasped loudly. We erupted together, our hands clamped together, our bodies fused, our mouths panting as we tried to control ourselves. But we didn’t have to. We were just us, fucking like mad men in love, two former athletes, two mechanics, coming together and loving every single drop of cum that erupted out of us for one another.
“Together.” I heard him breathe into my ear as we came down from our high, his body relaxing over mine, our pants slowing down, but our hands remained locked.
“Together.” I echoed.
I was ready to be with Ivan. Proud to be with Ivan. To be totally and completely gay with my man.
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