Sunrise

Levi lay in the hospital bed staring over his father’s shoulder at the wall. He heard only a phrase or a word his father was saying as he turned inward, thinking about last night and how it led to him banged up in the hospital. His left arm and right leg were in braces, and it seemed there were bandages all over his body. He hurt everywhere, every move or shift on the bed bringing about a sharp pain.

“…your truck is totaled…”

Barrel rolling along the shoulder of Broad Street north of town. Debris and glass flying around the cabin. The sound of metal impacting the ground, a crushing, bending sound that spoke of the force of the wreck. Levi had driven off the road at a place where the ditch was steeply banked. The rear of the truck slid down into the ditch bottom and suddenly he had gotten sideways. Then he hit the culvert for the drive to the Watson place. It seemed like an eternity, the way the truck flipped into the air. A rotation that made him feel dizzy even now, hours later. The truck had flipped over the gravel drive, landing in the ditch on the other side and began rolling along the shoulder.

How many times the truck rolled Levi had no idea. He tried to reimagine those few seconds, but it was just a blur. He had felt the loss of balance, of being whipped around, but no sense of up or down, until the truck came to rest on the passenger side. He had been hanging from the driver’s seat, secured in place by the seatbelts. There was the panic from realizing he had wrecked, the foolish thought of how bad his truck was damaged, then the sensation of pain. Lights flashed over the truck, and someone was calling out his name, then he had lost consciousness.

Levi woke to being loaded in an ambulance, then someone attending to him as they moved quickly over the roads. He woke again in the hospital being wheeled into the emergency room hearing someone call out for x-rays.

That had been last night, sometime before eleven. The late afternoon sun shined through the open blinds and Levi could feel the blanket over his legs warming with its radiation as he turned his attention back to his father.

“…you’re lucky…hairline fracture…just a sprained ankle…”

“How bad did you say the truck is?” Levi asked, interrupting his father.

Buddy Johnson was fifty-one and a farmer. His three children were grown, the oldest, Shelley was almost thirty with two boys and a husband who worked in banking. His youngest was Wyatt, only twenty-three, but married with a little girl and another child on the way. They were settled into adulthood to Buddy’s way of thinking. Laying before him was his middle child, but the oldest boy, the one he had put the most responsibility. Levi was twenty-six and still single and no prospects of a girlfriend, much less a wife. Levi was the child that worried him the most, the one that seemed at times to act like a caged animal, pacing back and forth all the time, or lost to his own thoughts. The one that caused him to sit up all night worried, trying to work out what made Levi lose control. There had been no alcohol in his system, no drugs either. But a nurse had said Levi came in hysterical, crying about some argument, then getting into the wreck.

“Son, it’s totaled.”

“Yeah…I figured as much.”

Mary Beth, Buddy’s wife, and Levi’s mother, shifted in her chair, then cleared her throat to garner their attention.

“Levi don’t worry about that truck. We’re just glad you didn’t get hurt worse than you have. The truck can be replaced.”

Levi nodded in agreement, then turned and looked through the blinds to the blue sky. It wasn’t the truck that troubled him, but what had caused him to lose control. He felt rudderless and laid up in the hospital only made that feeling more pronounced.

 

 

Levi woke to find he was alone. The only light on was the one behind him that illuminated the monitors and his bed for the nurses. He raised the head of the bed until sitting up. It was dark outside, and he looked at his cell phone seeing it was after nine o’clock.

The door opened and Wyatt walked in, taking a seat next to the bed.

“Are you feeling better?” asked Wyatt.

“Not really. I feel like the truck ran over me.”

“You look it too,” Wyatt joked, grinning back at Levi, making him chuckle.

“So, you want to tell me what happened.”

“You know; I ran off the road.”

“Yeah, I got that version, but what made you run off the road?”

“What do you mean?”

Wyatt sighed, leaning back with legs stretched out. “Okay, Levi. The doctor still letting you go home in the morning?”

“That is what he said.”

“Mom is not going to let you go to your place.”

“I know. I’ll crash at their place for a couple of days, long enough for her to see I’m good, then I’ll go home.”

“You’ll need wheels.”

“Dad said I could use the old truck.”

“That’ll make you get a new truck as quick as possible.”

Levi’s cellphone rang and he reached for it as Wyatt stood and moved to the window to look out into the dark night.

“Hey sis.”

“Mom says you’re going home in the morning.”

“Yep.”

“She also told me what you were like when they first brought you in.”

“What do you mean?”

“She said you were hysterical.”

“I think that is a bit of an-“

“Levi, I think I know what is going on with you. I remember when I had my seventeenth birthday party, and you were fourteen. God, how you looked at Robby, Mark, and Tyler.”

“Shelley.”

“Levi, I may be wrong, but I’ve thought about it since then and how you looked at other boys. You would even be tongued tied around them. You skipped out on your proms, didn’t date in high school, and as far as I know, have yet to date someone.”

“Shelley, please, not now.”

“Levi, you are miserable. The only time you seemed to have some happiness was back in August when we were down. But you were so secret, going off not telling us what you were up to I had to wonder if my brother is gay.”

“-“

“Tell me I’m wrong. Levi, tell me I’ve got everything wrong.”

Levi held the phone with a shaking hand as he looked at Wyatt standing at the window, who turned toward him with a questioning look. “I can’t.”

“You have to talk to someone. Talk to Wyatt.”

“Wyatt?”

“Levi, trust me, talk to him.”

“I don’t know if I can do it.”

“You have to do it. You have to have someone you can talk to about this. Do you want to be alone the rest of your life?”

“No.”

“Talk to Wyatt,” Shelley replied, then hung up before Levi could protest.

Levi set his phone back on the nightstand as Wyatt came back to the side of the bed and sat down.

“What about me?”

“Shelley thinks…”

“Come on big brother, what is it?”

“She thinks I should talk to you.”

“About what?”

“Me.”

 

 

Wyatt came out of Levi’s room, easing the door closed. It was after eleven and the hospital was quiet, the corridor empty. As he headed to the elevator a nurse came around a corner and smiled at him. He smiled back and entered the corridor at the elevators. As he waited for the cab to make it up from the ground floor he thought of Levi’s confession. He wanted to be shocked by it, but he had to admit he already suspected. There had been so many clues. Clues he had ignored and gave innocent explanations, something that seemed so foolish now.

It had rattled him to see his older brother cry, then confess to being afraid. Afraid of rejection and being asked to leave. He had held it in, shallowed his breathing for he felt he had to be strong for Levi. To be supportive and make the whole issue seem no big deal. It was just a part of Levi and nothing else needed to be said. But he knew the lie of it. Levi had not shied away from the fact he would have to tell their parents. Wyatt couldn’t believe someone who was twenty-six, living in their own place, could still feel so dependent on others. He wondered how his life would be different if he didn’t have Rachel and Emily.

Moving out of the hospital lobby into the warm humid night, he wanted to call Shelley. She would know how to tell their parents. He wondered how early he could call her in the morning, thinking he would ask her to come down the next weekend. By then Levi would probably be back home and things would be getting back to normal.

 

 

Levi lay in bed staring at the black screen of the television. He felt some relief after talking to Wyatt. Shelley had been right. There had been a surprising amount of support. The only worry was the need to tell their parents, otherwise he would continue to be living a secretive life, something that now seemed unbearable.

He lay still as he went back to when everything started. The day he allowed himself to open up to someone. Now he seemed to be being punished for it. Foolishly thinking he could have a life where he was content and happy. He had been having regrets, reconsidering the developing relationship which led to the argument, then the wreck. Maybe he should have been content with anonymous hookups, the late night drives down to Greenville to meet someone from online or the guys he met in bars down in Mobile or Pensacola, or over in Montgomery. It should have been enough, but it had not been, not when he saw Shelley and Wyatt settling into lives that were so fulfilling, lives that made everyone happy, none more so than their parents.

But was it right to blame the argument and wreck on his pursuit of his own happiness. Wasn’t it him getting cold feet, seeking to crawl back into his isolation that had him laying up in a hospital bed. It made him breathless to consider either.

The door eased open a few inches and he saw Austin stick his head through the gap and look around the room. The wavy black hair, the green eyes scanning the room and concealed by the door a tall lean muscular body, over six feet tall and ‘strapping’ as he heard some describe Austin. But Austin Ellis Garrison was also outgoing, defiant, and openly gay, something that earned him rebuke and the judgement of many in the community. But those that tried to bully Austin found the years of baseball and basketball, the hours spent in the gym working out, had made what first appeared to be a lean body, one strong enough to fight back, able to stand up to those that threatened him.

Levi remembered what Josh, Austin’s oldest brother and his best friend, had told him a couple of years ago about Austin coming out. How he pushed back against anyone who dared to judge him, shaming several into silence. Josh had laughed about it, his little brother, the one that was eight years his junior, six younger than the twins, Morgan and Noah, was the most rebellious. Their father, Sam Garrison, had been worried about Austin, feared for his youngest son’s safety, but after having to go to the school for the second time, had referred to him as his James Dean, the rebel.  

Levi looked at him now, eighteen, still looking like a kid in so many ways, but he pictured him naked, the masculine nature of his physical presence, knowing Austin was a man, one who knew what he wanted in life.

“Hey, can I come in?” Austin asked.

Levi heard the tone, one unsure, and it seemed so alien coming from Austin, but he knew it wasn’t about being seen by his parents or brother in his room, but it was whether, or not he wanted to see him.

“Yes.”

Levi found himself glad Austin was there as he watched him come to his bedside, pull the chair closer and sit.

“I would have come sooner but figured you didn’t want me around. They say you’re just banged up and will get to go home soon.”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“I’m leaving in the morning to go home, or more likely mom and dads for a few days.”

“That’s good.”

“Austin-“

“Look, we can talk later. Right now, just get better.”

Levi saw the concern, the worry in the green eyes, then the nervous habit of running a hand through the hair, a rare occurrence for Austin.

“Austin, I’m sorry.”

He saw the surprised look, and it made him smile. He didn’t know what to say or how to say it, but they were alone and he had to set things right. He had lain awake half the night thinking about Austin and what might could be if only he allowed himself to accept it.

“I have overreacted to things, let my fear of what others think just fuck everything up. I was so lonely before we…felt so isolated. Even Wyatt was beginning to notice how bad things were getting. But at the Fourth celebration, that day in the park, when we…when you saw me, really saw me like no one else, and…I want to ask for your forgiveness. I want to know, after I get back on my feet, if we can, maybe…start over.

Austin leaned back, at first looking surprised, then a slow smile formed, and he nodded his head.

“I’d like that.”

“I told Wyatt I’m gay.”

“Seriously? How did he respond?”

“Like you told me he would.”

The smile with the perfect teeth, and Levi wanted to reach out and touch the cheek, or the chin knowing he would feel about the only place a beard was trying to come in. Austin leaned forward and Levi felt fingers rest on his arm. A gentle touch, one barely perceptible, but he felt each finger against his skin, and it sent shivers up his arm.

“What about Shelley?”

“She already knew.”

Austin laughed, “Did you know my brothers and sister know?”

“I know Josh knows, but we haven’t talked about it. He made a comment that I should have used as an opening to talk to him. But we were at Green’s, and I couldn’t do it,” Levi replied referring to the small general store to the west of town.

“You’ll have to tell your folks. You know that, right?”

“I know. I’m planning on doing it tomorrow night,” Levi replied, the plan suddenly hatched in his mind as something he could put off no longer.

“You want me to come over?”

Levi tried to imagine a scenario where his father and mother didn’t react negatively at first, then he tried to imagine eighteen year old Austin Garrison standing next to him, eight years his junior, telling them they were dating. No scenario seemed like something he wanted to endure. It would be enough to do it on his own.

“No, I think this is something I should do alone.”

“Not completely alone, right? I trust Wyatt will be there.”

“Yes, I’ll get him to be there.”

Austin scooted closer and Levi lay back and tried to find the right words to say how he really felt. He skirted around how serious he felt about Wyatt, stumbling over his words until it made the two of them laugh. When Austin finally left, he felt it, that contented feeling he had possessed for the first month of their going out. The sheer joy of having someone in his life. The dinner at home with the two of them trying to cook, the simple evenings watching a movie, then there was the sex and sleeping together, having another sharing his bed. He tried to imagine going back to how things were before Austin, how the loneliness had been so painful.

After Austin left, he lay in the silence of the room and thought back through everything that had happened. He pictured the day Austin came into his life. The community celebration of the Fourth, a day that had been perfect, not a cloud in the sky. He remembered how vivid blue it had been and at one point the only blemish the contrails of an airplane passing overhead. He closed his eyes and let the day come back to him. He heard the blue grass band playing at the shelter, the cries of children in play, and the voices of those around him. Then he saw Noah crossing the open grass area with Austin following.

 

---

The sound of blue grass music drifted over the park. A small crowd sat at the shelter watching the band play, and out from it, others were on blankets. Around the small pond, people pushed strollers, walked behind small children on tricycles or small bicycles with training wheels. There was a softball game on the playing field with family and friends on the old wooden bleachers cheering them on.

Levi arrived late, the grills fired up and smoking with the cooking of hamburgers and hotdogs. He saw his father manning one grill and Sam Garrison at the next one with other men of the community standing around them, a beer or soda in hand. As he followed a sidewalk heading toward the shelter the farthest away, one that sat on a small rise under oak trees, he saw Josh and Lisa among those sitting underneath it. Then he took notice of the others, all classmates from high school, or were only a year or two younger, and all who had stayed in the area, farming or taking a job in town or in a larger nearby town. There was Cassidy and Hannah, married before graduation, Sara, Andy, June, and Matthew. He knew the latter four were dating each other and he wondered when they would marry. Josh and Lisa had married five years ago and had two kids. He looked at his friends feeling his difference, how he wasn’t truly one of them. He wasn’t going to get married and have children, attend PTA meetings or school functions, or have cookouts and birthday parties. He would always be separate, eventually becoming the confirmed bachelor.

Someone yelled and Levi turned to see Noah and Austin approaching from the baseball field, Austin’s pants filthy from sliding into a base. Following them was Morgan and Scott, her boyfriend. Noah grabbed Austin around the neck and playfully pulled him along the walk. Two brothers being playful, joyous, lost in the moment. It was more poignant for Levi when he considered how Austin was gay. Even now, after being out for two years, Levi noticed of how some still looked at Austin, how they still judged him, convinced of their own moral superiority. Austin seemed oblivious to their stares and comments. But Levi noticed. His eyes seem to fall on every ugly stare and those making comments. It was why he kept his secret, lived a solitary life, with only an occasional hookup to push back the loneliness.

He arrived at the shelter at the same time as Austin and Noah.

“Hey, Levi, you finally made it,” said Austin.

“Yeah. I miss anything.”

“Just me winning our game.”

“Brag, why don’t ya,” Noah exclaimed. “Levi, can you believe the conceit of this guy?”

“Hey guys, the food it ready, let’s go get in line,” said Andy.

Those seated came to their feet and in groups of three or four made their way to the tables set up with the food. Josh fell in next to Levi, the two of them falling to the rear of their group.

“Hey, why are you so late?”

“I don’t know. I just got busy doing some stuff around the house and let time slip up on me.”

“Lisa is thinking about having a birthday party for Zach. It’s three weeks away. Will you come?”

“Josh, that is for kids his age-“

“Come on, don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Pull away like this. You’ve been doing it more and more. How often do you just sit at home at night doing nothing?”

“Not all the time.”

“You know, I use to think you were just shy, introverted, but…”

“Hey guys, come on, speed it up,” said Lisa, looking back at them.

“We’re coming,” Josh replied, waving her off. “If there is something you want to talk about, you know you can come to me, right?”

“There isn’t anything to talk about.”

“Okay, okay, I’m not going to push, but seriously, I think you know there is nothing you can’t tell me.”

Levi heard the insinuation. Josh had been the first one Austin came out to, the one to stand by him when he told the rest of their family. Did he suspect him of being gay too. It felt like a possibility as he found himself watching Austin walk alongside Noah, Morgan and June.

 

 

Levi stood at the back of the crowd as fireworks exploded over the pond. At first it was one or two at a time but as the display progressed the sky soon filled with multiple explosions happening at once. When it was over, he was going to slip away and go home. He didn’t sense the presence of someone coming up next to him, or recognize the voice when he heard his name.

“Hey Levi.”

He turned to see Austin standing next to him. The face glowed a warm amber, then red as the fireworks exploded overhead. It surprised him to have Austin next to him, then he grew anxious about it being just the two of them.

“What’s up?”

“Some of us are going to the Soda Shoppe for ice cream. You want to go? I could use a ride and thought that, maybe, we could ride together.”

At first Levi felt trapped, as if Austin was waving one of those rainbow flags over his head, but then he noticed no one was paying attention to them, all eyes looking up at the fireworks.

“Yeah, sure, why not.”

 

 

Levi led Austin to his truck wondering if he was making a huge mistake. He saw some of the looks as the two of them crossed the park, then moved through the parking lot. After Austin had asked him to go he thought up all the ways he could back out, the excuses or reasons he could have used to leave. But none left his lips. Instead, he found himself leading Austin to his truck. He tried to blow it off, make it appear he was just giving Josh’s little brother a ride. But walking by the taller boy, the physical nature of him so close, every sense was awakened to his presence.

Austin was Josh’s little brother.

Austin was only eighteen, eight years his junior.

Austin was openly gay.

Austin was Josh’s little brother.

Over and over, he repeated it to himself as he led Austin to his truck.

“Is Josh and Lisa going to be there?”

“Hey, come on, the shop closes in twenty minutes,” Austin replied, changing the subject.

It was only a few minutes’ drive into town and the Soda Shoppe. Just three or four minutes. But it was long enough for Austin to force his reveal.

“Levi, I’ve seen how you look at other guys…and me.”

“What? No?! Don’t…”

“Don’t what? I’m just saying I think-“

“I don’t give a shit what you think,” Levi blurted out, hearing the fear in his voice, coming out as anger. He saw the surprised expression; how shocked Austin was at his reply. “Look, I’m sorry but you can’t know that.”

“I can’t know that you’re gay too?”

Levi ran off the road and maneuvered the truck back into its lane. He took a deep breath and looked over at Austin who sat leaning against the door angled toward him. He didn’t know how to respond. Austin had sounded so confident and he knew he would struggle to argue with him.

“Austin, drop it, okay?”

“Aren’t you sick of being alone? Sick of doing hookups with some guy and calling it enough?”

“Hookups?”

“I found your profile, Farmboy96. Not very creative, but a bit of deduction and I realized it was my oldest brother’s best friend.”

Levi felt like making Austin get out so he could rush home. They were among traffic heading into or through town and to pull over suddenly and make Austin get out would only spur the rumor mill into action. He thought of the Soda Shoppe on Broad Street, the main street through town and how he could pull around to the back of the buildings off Oak Street and park in the shadows away from prying eyes.

“Relax Levi. I’m not going to tell anyone. That is for you to do when you are ready. But sooner or later, you need to come out to your family.”

“You don’t know what I need,” Levi replied gruffly.

“Listen to you. Scared and angry over me just admitting I know you’re gay. And here’s the thing, I like you. I have liked you for as long as I can remember. Why you, I don’t know, and for years I considered you unobtainable. You’re the same age as Josh, and it made you seem so much older, out of reach, I never considered my attraction anything more than some kid’s crush.”

“Austin, this is insane.”

“Yeah, in a way. My oldest brother’s best friend has a secret and his youngest brother, still just a little kid in his eyes, knows that secret. And the damn thing of it all, is that secret is he is gay. And you’re still single, living alone in that old Meadow’s house. It was your great-grandmother’s, right?”

“Yes.”

Levi pulled around the back of the Soda Shoppe, pulling into one of the parking spaces along the fence. He shut off the engine and sat back.

“Levi, come on, let’s get some ice cream.”

“Who else is going to be here?”

The door opens, turning on the interior lights making Levi squint. Austin slides off the seat and stands in the open door.

“It’s just the two of us. Now come on, get out. You’re buying.”

 

 

The lights were going out in the Soda Shoppe as the front door was locked behind Levi and Austin. They strolled away from the shop, each with an ice cream cone, licked down to the top of the cone. Levi realized he no longer felt anxious. No one was around, the few customers at the shop having left long ago. In the silence, the town closed down for the night, he could walk by Austin without his usual fears.

“How long have you known?” Levi asked without looking over at Austin.

“Last April.”

“Three months ago?”

“Yep. I was going to corner you right away. You know, confess my attraction toward you and make you do the same in return, but then I came to my senses knowing how you looked at me. Josh’s little kid brother.”

“You have to admit, when we were in high school, you were only eight, nine years old. You were just a kid.”

“I know but not now. When you look at me now, can you not see a man?”

Levi scoffed, louder than he meant to, then he started laughing.

“It’s not funny,” Austin exclaimed, but he smiled despite himself for it was good to see Levi in a lighter mood.

“Look, I know, you’re eighteen, out of school, but…”

“But?”

“First off, Josh would kill me.”

“You think he would believe you would be taking advantage of his little brother, taking his virginity or some shit like that?”

“Well, yeah.”

“I’m not a virgin.”

“I figured as much, to be honest. You being out and so open about it.”

“Levi, wouldn’t you prefer to have someone in your life? Someone who was there every day?”

“Yes, of course. I think of it all the time, but…”

“But what? You have to live a lie and please a bunch of people who don’t give a shit about you? Fuck that.”

“Can you live in a place where most people hate you?”

“Wil and Roberta do,” Austin replied, referring to his African-American friends from high school.

“Good point,” Levi uttered under his breath.

They turned at the corner heading down Oak Street for the parking lot behind the buildings. Something flew through the streetlight, silent, only a small dark mass fluttering through it.

“That was a bat,” said Levi, looking up to see if it came back.

“Batmannnn,” Austin joked, making them giggle at the silliness of it.

They came up to the truck and Levi pulled out his keys to unlock his door, thinking Austin would move around to the passenger side. Suddenly hands grabbed him by the biceps, spun him around, and pushed him against the truck. Austin was stronger than he looked, and Levi found himself pinned against the side of the bed.

“What are you doing?” Levi asked as he tried to push back.

“What does it look like. I’m getting your attention.”

“You got it, now what?”

Austin was kissing him, finding lips pressed to his own. The tall lean body pushed against him, then a knee moved up between his legs. He struggled with his desires as the knee pressed against his crotch, as lips pressed against his own, as hands held him in place. His cock flexed within its confines and he found himself kissing back. Relaxing in Austin’s grasp, then breathing hard with his head tilted back as lips moved down his jaw, along his neck, then up to his ear. A hot exhale, then lips grazing it with their movement.

“You can’t tell me no, can you?”

“No,” Levi uttered as Austin tugged on his ear, then released his arms. The hands touched his chest, rubbed over it, one upward moving to cup his neck, the other downward, slipping over his crotch groping his growing erection.

“Take me home with you,” Austin whispered.

“No…I can’t…”

A squeeze of his cock, then lips against his own again. Austin seemed to suck the breath out of him, then pulled back.

“Yes, you can.”

Levi felt his growing arousal, this need for Austin. He relaxed in Austin’s hold, kissed him back, then pushed him back.

“Get in the truck.”

 

 

Levi led Austin across the back porch, through the kitchen and down the short hall to his bedroom at the front of the house. Standing by his bed, they stared at each other hesitating for just a short time. Then Austin smiled and began to undress.

“Levi,” Austin whispered as he tossed his shirt into a chair.

Levi seemed to wake from a trance and began to undress as he watched Austin undo his jeans then push them down. Austin was naked first, moving to Levi to help him pull each foot free of his jeans and boxers. On knees, Austin ran his hands up Levi’s legs until cupping the sac and manipulating the cock. Levi shivered as his cock hardened in Austin’s hand. He closed his eyes as his cock grew rock hard.

“Oh,” Levi uttered as he felt Austin suck his cock. He tried to stay still but it felt too good and he began to work his hips, pushing his cock into that hot wet mouth, then he slowly tugged it outward feeling his cock slide through the lips. Over and over, he worked his hips until he felt on edge, his cock achingly rock hard, ready to explode.

The mouth pulled off his cock, hands held his upper arms and pushed him around and back until the bed hit the back of his legs and he eased down on it. Austin went down between legs and took his cock again. And again, Levi closed his eyes focused on the sensation of Austin’s mouth moving up and down on it. Then he felt a hand slide along his thigh, the fingers grazing the skin until working his tightening sac. Austin pushed down on his cock all the way while tugging on his sac. He shuddered and cried out and brought his feet up until on the edge of the bed. It spread him, open to Austin’s manipulations. His sac was released and the fingers moved down below it until touching his tight opening. A circling rub until he was trying to push his ass down on the fingers, then the penetration. One finger, two fingers, then three bored into his hole, stretched his tight opening until he loosened to the breach of his hole.

“Austin…fuck me,” Levi uttered in a hoarse breathless whisper.

Hands took his ankles and pulled upward as Austin came to his feet. Legs spread wide apart Levi felt his nudity, the exposure of his body for Austin’s pleasure. He watched him moved closer, pushing down a long, curved cock. It touched his opening, rubbed up and down over it, then pushed against its tightness. Austin breached it, pulled out, and breached it again. Each time Austin pushed in deeper until the head and a couple of inches of the shaft were sinking into his depths. He clutched at the bed as Austin began to fuck, to tug outward and push in, over and over, building up a faster pace, a steady rhythm of fucking him.

Suddenly Austin was manhandling him, working him around on the bed, then pushing his legs down until his thighs were pressed against his chest. Cock bore into his depths and Austin was fucking him again. Harder, faster, driving into his depths until their bodies smacked together. The sound of it was a steady staccato, rhythmic to their movements, their fuck.

“I’ve wanted this for so long,” Austin uttered then leaned down and kissed Levi as he ground his hips against Levi’ upturned ass.

Levi felt the undulation, this primitive movement that spoke of such desire and need. The heat of one body against the other, the contact slick and hot. Austin moved slickly over his him while working cock into his depths. Then Austin grabbed him by the wrists, holding each down as he rose and fucked with a brutal pace. Austin hammered cock into his depths, cried out, and shuddered with release.

“Roll over,” Austin uttered once he was on his knees between Levi’s legs.

Levi rolled to his stomach and Austin was on him quickly, pushing slick cock back into his hole. It was a slow fuck. The working of cock into his depths and the grinding of hips against his ass. The sweaty body rubbing over his back, the lips touching his neck, along the shoulder. Levi closed his eyes and fell into the void of sexual desire, that place where nothing existed outside of the space around them. The place of their connection, their fuck. Austin seemed to last for hours, but far too soon, Levi felt him increase his pace, to work hips harder and faster. An arm circled his neck and bearhugged their bodies together and hot exhales caressed the side of his face.

“I’m going to come again,” Austin whispered breathlessly, then he buried his cock all the way and shuddered with release.

Levi was so hard his cock ached for release. But he wondered if Austin had the energy to continue, to do something to bring him off. Suddenly the hands were manhandling him again, getting him to roll over. Austin was over him, one hand holding his chin and the other behind Austin’s back. He felt fingers toy with his cock, then slide down its length smearing his precum over it. He tried to push upward but Austin had him pinned to the bed sitting on his stomach. Austin leaned down and pressed their lips together, then with lips still touching, a whispered plea.

“Let me,” Austin uttered.

Levi couldn’t believe the stamina, the pure drive for sexual pleasure. But he saw it, felt it, as Austin sat up, held his cock up, and eased down on it.

“Fuck, that feels good,” Austin exclaimed as he descended down every inch.

Austin moved up and down in a steady rhythm, working ass up and down Levi’s cock. He watched it come into view then disappear as Austin rode him. He saw Austin’s cock, half hard and leaking smacking down on his stomach, then flopping around as Austin leaned back until resting on his hands. Levi watched him increase his pace, working ass up and down until smacking down on his hips. The bed rocked and squeaked with the physicality of Austin’s fuck. Levi reached out and held each ankle, his grip tightening as his need for release increased.

“Come on, Levi. Give it to me,” Austin uttered.

It was like Austin pulled some trigger for Levi shoved upward and shuddered with release as Austin ground his ass down on him.

 

 

The shower ran hot, steaming up the small bathroom. The cheap plastic curtain stretched with Austin’s tug on it as he pushed into Levi’s depths. Levi leaned against the wall, hands braced on it, feeling Austin bore into his depths. Hands came to his waist, holding him in place, as Austin began to fuck. To drive into his depths and tug outward, at times all the way. He felt each breach of his opening and thrust into his depths. His own cock flopped heavily between his thighs and he took it in hand, stroking until hard as rock, and he didn’t stop, continuing in pace with Austin’s fuck.

“Fuck,” Austin grunted, tightening his grip on Levi’s waist. “Take it…take me,” he uttered as he shoved inward and hammered his hips against Levi’s ass until coming.

Levi felt Austin’s moment of release, how he jammed cock into his depths, then pushed against his ass, over and over, knowing how each was with each ejaculation. He stroked his cock until his toes curled and his body tightened. He tilted his head back and cried out as his cock erupted, spraying the wall with cum.

 

 

They snuggled on the bed, their naked bodies intertwined.

“Don’t you need to go home?” Levi whispered in the dark.

“No. You’re not going to make me leave, are you?”

“No.”

 

 

Thus, it had begun. Austin coming over to Levi’s house, night after night. They went to dinner in Montgomery or Greenville, but never in town. There was talk of a weekend at Pensacola Beach or in Mobile or New Orleans. There were nights Austin circled around their growing relationship, how he wanted to make it more than the sneaking around. Levi let his fears push back or change the subject. Then the night came that they argued, Austin growing weary of how it seemed they had reached a point where there was no growth to their relationship. A stagnation that threatened it. He had pushed Levi to go to the Soda Shoppe for a quick dinner. Just the two of them out for a sandwich. Levi pushed back, saying no, they couldn’t be seen together, not in town.

“You’re scared to be seen with me,” Austin whispered, afraid to say it aloud for the truth of it would be too much.

“NO, that’s not it.”

“Then what is it? We can’t live like this.”

“It’s just…no one would understand and…”

“Levi.”

“Austin, please. This is harder for me than it was for you.”

“Levi, it wasn’t easy. You think I liked being stared at, bullied at school, or have nasty comments hurled at me?”

“No, but…”

“Levi, this isn’t good for you, and we can’t continue like this.”

“What are saying?”

“I can’t go on like this.”

“But…wait…we can…”

“Levi, I think you should go home and don’t call me anymore,” Austin uttered with tears streaming down his cheeks.

Levi had stood on the Garrison’s porch long after Austin had gone back inside and closed the door. He wanted to knock, to bang on the door and beg Austin to come back out, but he knew he wasn’t being fair. Austin just wanted a normal life, and he had been too scared to give it to him. Why did he care so much what others would think? What did it matter if the whole area knew he was gay?

It was late and bugs hovered around him drawn to the light from the fixtures on each side of the front door, and he knew it was time to go home. It was all there was left to do. Just go home, back to his isolation and loneliness. He staggered down the steps back to his truck. Tears began to pool in his eyes and trickle down his cheeks as he pulled out to the road and headed home.

Vision blurry with tears and him speeding up to get home as fast as possible, he suddenly found himself in the ditch. He tried to turn back on the road, but the rear wheels slid down to the ditch bottom. Then he got sideways.

---

 

Levi heard someone in the hospital room. They were at the foot of the bed probably looking at the flowers and cards, then he heard them come to the side of the bed and sit down. He opened his eyes to see Josh.

“Hey, what are you doing here?”

“I just come to see how you’re doing.”

“What time is it?”

“Six thirty.”

“Jesus, Josh, why so early?”

“I just wanted us to talk, before you parents got here.”

Levi raised the bed until sitting up as Josh sat back, silent, waiting for him to get into position.

“You know,” said Levi.

“That my little brother and best friend are sneaking around together? Yeah, I know.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for-“

“Levi!” Josh exclaimed. He smiled, shaking his head. “That brat really knows how to stir things up. He really likes you; you know.”

Levi nodded.

“He came over last night and told me everything. But if I’m honest, I already knew. Had since last weekend when I saw the two of you driving out of town, Montgomery if I’m not mistaken.”

“Are you angry?”

“Angry? No, I’m not angry. I’m upset my best friend didn’t trust me enough to tell me. I’m upset my brat of a brother pushed you so hard.”

“He was right to do so.”

“Maybe.”

“What do you think about Austin and I being together?”

“What was that old show we use to watch in reruns? The Twilight Zone. Remember the crazy storylines? Well, I’m in one now,” said Josh, chuckling.

“It does feel a bit strange. Austin was always just a kid.”

“Well, he is no kid now. I imagine he was the one to initiate something.”

“Yeah, boy did he…” Levi blushed, realizing what he was about to reveal, Austin’s aggressiveness when it came to sex.

“He is fierce to a fault.”

“What will your parents say?”

Austin laughed, aloud, then looked at Levi with a grin. “Doesn’t matter what they will say. Austin Ellis Garrison will do what Austin Ellis Garrison wants, and they can support him or not.”

“But I don’t want to cause any problems.”

“Levi, if you’re the one Austin will settle down with, make a life for himself, don’t you think that would be seen as the best thing for him. Any you.”

“I guess.”

“I guess? You always had this lack of confidence that troubled me at times. I hate to admit it, but Austin might just be the one that pulls you out of it. The thing I don’t know, is how will your parents accept it.”

“Accept what?” Mary Beth asked as Buddy and she came into the room.

Josh looked up startled but from the bed came a laugh. Uncontrolled, almost hysterical.

“What so funny?” Buddy asked.

“It’s just…we need to talk but can it wait until I’m out of here?” Levi asked.

“I need to get going. I’ll check up with you later,” said Josh climbing to his feet. He said goodbye to everyone and eased out of the door.

“The nurse said the doctor will be making his rounds around nine or ten and he should release you then,” Mary Beth said as she took the chair Josh had been in.

 

 

Two Weeks Later

Levi sat on back porch watching Austin mow the rear yard. He could have done it, but with the brace still on his arm Austin insisted he should rest and let him do it. He looked at Austin, considering the physical within the dirty white t-shirt and jeans, then the person. Outgoing, so extroverted as to be defiant. Then he considered their relationship. Austin was his boyfriend. The one to have clothes stashed in his closet and chest of drawers. The one to spend more nights with him than not. The one who shared his bed, gave him the emotional and physical support he had been craving for so long.

“My boyfriend,” Levi uttered aloud as he watched Austin maneuver around a pecan tree.

Their families now knew everything and he thought about Shelley’s visit the weekend after he got out of the hospital, how she came in and pushed the last of their parents doubts and fears away. To see Wyatt, then Shelley take his side, stand in support had been the thing needed to bring their parents around. Then there was the issue of Austin, eighteen, a kid in everyone’s eyes, until the night he came over and stood next to him. Taller, almost as muscular, a person who was becoming a man, no longer the little kid that used to follow Josh and the twins.

Austin pulled the mower into the small shed and shut it off. With the door secured, he ambled across the yard, knocking off the dirt and grass from his clothes. Levi watched him come up the steps and drop down in the rocker with legs outstretched.

“Well, the grass is cut,” said Austin, knocking more dirt from a pant leg.

“Thanks for doing it.”

“You’re welcome,” Austin replied with a grin.

“When I get rid of this brace, you want to go down to New Orleans for a long weekend?”

“That would be nice.”

“What are your parents planning for the twins birthday?”

“The usual party. I’m afraid it’ll be more like a day care center with most of them having babies and little kids.”

“Not like the parties back in high school.”

“Nope. I’m going to get cleaned up.”

“Your clothes are hung up. They were getting wrinkled folded up on the shelf.”

“You made some room for my clothes?”

“Yeah, on the right side,” Levi replied knowing what it meant. This slow integration into his life. A few clothes here and there, then half the closet and drawers for Austin’s things. Austin had keys to the house, his new truck, and the shed. His favorite snack foods were stashed in the pantry and drinks in the refrigerator. As Austin went inside, he saw the sneakers, the boots, and the sandals lined next to his own shoes. He sat back thinking of it, how everything was aligning in his life. It was as Austin warned him, far too many would make an issue of them being gay and now practically living together. It was the hypocrisy of it that galled Levi the most. Support from family and friends made it a nuisance, and nothing more.

After a minute Levi pictured Austin in the shower all soaped up. He climbed to his feet and eased into the house. In his bedroom, he stripped out of his clothes, then went to the bathroom. The door was cracked open, and he could see Austin in the shower as he pictured him. White suds cascading down the tall lean body. He eased into the room, slid the shower curtain to the side and stepped into the tub.

“Wash my back,” said Austin, not turning around, instead holding out the washcloth full of soap.

Levi ran the cloth over the shoulders, down the back, and over the round ass cheeks. He moved the cloth firmly over the skin scrubbing it clean, then lightly letting soap remain in its wake. Then he moved up against the back circling his arms around the narrow waist. They moved against each other causing Levi to grow erect. He had taken Austin in hand causing him to become erect too.

“On the bed or in here?” asked Levi.

“In here,” Austin replied, and he moved within Levi’s arms, spun around until they faced each other. A kiss, then Levi moved down before Austin and took him in his mouth. He sucked until Austin filled his mouth and he couldn’t take all of it, then he stood and turned to the wall.

Levi angled his ass back, feet set apart, feeling Austin move up close. Cock rubbed over his ass, and when he reached back and spread his cheeks, he felt the cock rub between them, up and down until he was moaning.

“Austin,” Levi uttered as cock continued to rake over his opening.

Levi held his head down as the cock pressed against his tightness. He sucked in air as it stretched him open, and he shivered as it sank into his hole. The fullness of the penetration aroused him, his own cock flexing and growing hard. Then Austin was against his back pumping hips against his ass. A hand snaked around his waist and stroked his cock.

“Fuck,” Levi uttered as he worked his hips back and forth, pushing back on Austin’s cock, then pushing his cock through the fist. Lips touched his neck. Austin’s other hand moved up his chest, raking over nipples, then down the chest and over the stomach as the other hand stroked him.

“I’m going to cum,” Levi uttered.

“Yes…cum for me…do it,” Austin uttered into Levi’s ear.

Levi jerked and shook then shoved his cock through the fist as he came. Every ejaculation was a flex of his cock in the tight fist and it made him shudder and jerk in Austin’s embrace. He felt Austin push against his ass and shudder, and he knew Austin was coming too.

 

 

Water droplets still clung to their skin as Austin eased Levi back to the bed then down on it. He moved over him, careful of the left arm, until sitting over the hips and the hardening cock. He moved on it, rocked his hips back and forth until Levi was rock hard and leaking.

“I’m moving in next weekend,” Austin uttered as he eased down on Levi’s cock.

“Fuck…now you bring it up…fuck,” Levi uttered as he fought the urge to push upward.

Austin moved up and down, his pace increasing.

“Don’t you want me?”

“Yes, you know I do.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Austin asked as he leaned forward and began to kiss along the neck, the jaw, until near the lips. “Are you going to tell me no?”

“No, of course not,” Levi replied as he tilted his head back and dug fingers into flexing thighs.

“Wyatt said he would help me,” Austin whispered, his tone so mischievous Levi opened his eyes and looked at him.

“Wwyatt…will help,” Levi stammered as Austin moved on his cock.

“Shhh, Levi,” Austin whispered as he worked his ass up and down on Levi’s cock.

 

The blinds were gapped and as the two naked bodies stirred and shifted against each other, the sky outside began to glow along the eastern horizon. It grew brighter, then the sky turned blue with another sunrise, another day.