Rowan's Journey to Manhood

In the previous chapters…

Rowan, a pale guy with many sexual inhibitions due to the abuse he suffered in the past, embarks in a long journey to a mature sexuality, helped by the men and boys living in a big house named “The Cove”. Charlie, a 19 y.o. playful boy, teaches him the joyful side of sex. Barry, an oversexed worker who looks alike Rowan’s abusive stepfather, scares him. Kale, a Hawaiian school counselor, shows him the tender, healing power of love. Beau, the blond leader of the Cove, experiments Rowan’s ‘power’ to block a man’s ejaculation until he begs to cum. Hendrick, the house young cook, lets Rowan discover how sweet and pleasurable can be anal sex when, after many years, the guy yields his ass to the redheaded boy. The wise Native American Wahkan teaches to Rowan how to trust another man and senses that the guy holds a great power in him. Rowan seems to come from another century, and reveals to his friends that his only school had been the old movies showed at Paul’s cinema. He then discovers the pleasure of submission during a hot bondage session with Kale. Rick explains that the Cove is a sort of shelter for all the men and the boys, including Beau. The day after, Beau reveals to Rowan the tragedy he hides in his heart and talks about the young stableman Jordan, his first love, who took his life after being raped by Joe, the black gardener, as per Beau’s father order. One night, Beau, masterfully mixing love and dominance, helps Rowan overcome his greatest fears: surrendering to an older man and staying indoors after sunset. Kale’s jealousy explodes. In a restless night, the Hawaiian remembers the French Riviera and Paris, where Beau made him embrace his true nature. In a last, risky attempt to save their love, Beau flies with Kale to Scotland, to Applecross House; there, they rekindle their love, helped by Brennan, a young valet that inspires such a deep affection to Beau that he takes him as his boy. Rowan is offered the unexpected chance to take revenge on his hatred stepfather by giving a furious fuck to Barry. Through a mind connection, Chayton “meets” Rowan’s Daddy and understands how deeply Rowan craved for his love... and maybe for something else. Making love to Brennan, Rowan fights and wins the fear of having inherited his daddy’s cruelty. Later, in a pitch-dark room, Rowan has a special “now-or-never moment” with Barry, who talk about his past life as a married man and receives an excruciating act of devotion from the guy. Alex and Barry rescue Jorell, a black homeless, and his boy LaShawn from a gang of homophobic thugs and bring them to the Cove. Jorell is actually Joe, the former gardener who raped Jordan (Beau’s first love), causing his death. Beau and Joe, with a dramatic clarification, come to terms with their past. After getting in trouble with an evil cop, Rowan learns from Alex how to submit to authority, and then makes use of all he’s learned to undergo a harsh punishment from the cop. Back at home, Kale helps the guy to focus on his natural sexual inclinations. A disease threatens the Cove, forcing Doctor Jade to declare a general quarantine. Alone in his room, Rowan, who already learned to love himself, now learns another lesson: how to make love to himself. When the quarantine is over, Kale helps Rowan re-evaluate his past experiences, and then the guy lives an intense, dramatic and highly sexual moment with Jorell. A week later, Rowan unexpectedly gets news about his real father, Caleb, from Gerry, a muscular mature man who used to know him. While the Cove attends a lavish ball at Maison de la Motte, Gerry unexpectedly comes to the mansion to meet Rowan and to give him the old leather jacket that Caleb was wearing when he died in an accident. Rowan asks to the mature man to spend the night with him.

Synopsys

Gerry talks about his relationship with Caleb, his only male lover. Rowan tries a sexual approach with him, but the man runs away. During the night, Alex and the studly handyman Lawrence engage in a "special" tug-of-war. At dawn, Rowan finds Gerry and their tormented souls finally find peace. 

Additional downloads (PDF)

~ Cast of Characters with SFW images
~ The Cove – Floor Plan
~ Book 01 (Chapters 1-10) with bookmarks and PictureBook01 with NSFW images
~ Book 02 (Chapter 11-20) with bookmarks and PictureBook02 with NSFW images
~ Book 03 (Chapter 21-30) with bookmarks and PictureBook03 with NSFW images
~ Book 04 (Chapter 31-40) with bookmarks and PictureBook04 with NSFW images
~ Book 05 (Chapter 41-50) with bookmarks and PictureBook05 with NSFW images
~ Book 06 (Chapter 51-54) with bookmarks and PictureBook06 with NSFW images

≈ TOUGHNESS AND TENDERNESS ≈

~ Caleb ~

“Tell me about my father…” – Rowan said, turning to Gerry and looking at him. They were lying on the French-size bed of the small bedroom at Maison de la Motte, basking in the silver moonlight flowing through the ample window.

The memory of the lavish grand ball was still vivid in the guy’s mind: the hot sex with the Creole butler, the exceptionally elegant evening dress he wore, the marveled glances he got when he came down from the grand staircase, the romantic waltz with Beau…

But for Rowan the most amazing, shaking and heart-warming part of that beautiful night was the unexpected visit by Gerry, who brought him a very special gift: his father’s leather jacket.

“There are so many things I can tell you about Caleb” – Gerry replied – What do you want to know?”

“Tell me about my father… and you”.

Gerry looked at the ceiling with dreaming eyes: “We loved each other so much! Your father, Caleb, was incredible, he was the toughest biker I’ve ever known, and the most tender lover at the same time. But our relationship was a well-guarded secret between us, no one had to know about us… Not only we were both married, but we lived in a small country village in New Mexico: back then… it was more than thirty years ago… for a man, loving another man just wasn’t an option. I’m actually amazed that we became lovers…”

“How did it happen?” – Rowan asked, feasting his eyes on the man’s muscular body, stripped to the underwear, and his hairy chest – “Well, looking at you I can easily guess what desires you may have inspired to my father…”

Gerry laughed: “Kid, you make me feel younger! As young as I was that day, when at the end of a day-long ride on our bikes with our friends we spent the night in a cheap motel along the road. To spare some money we split in couples and I ended sleeping with Caleb in the same bed”.

“We were both horny as hell, after so many hours riding our bikes, and there was a moment of silent embarrassment, when we stripped to our briefs and noticed that we both were nursing a huge hard-on. At first, we pretended not to notice it, but when we lay on the bed our eyes couldn’t stop eating each other’s bodies”.

“Until then, neither of us had even thought about having sex with another man: we were totally into women… and we never stopped being ladies’ men. But that night there was something special between us, an unspoken tension… I extended a hand to feel Caleb’s pecs, and I actually expected him to shove my hand away, but he didn’t”.

“He leaned forward, until our faces were so close that I could smell his breath. His eyes were so uncertain, hesitant. I was myself quite a self-assured, dominant man, but in that moment I felt intoxicated by his inner power, by his overwhelming masculinity, and my cock almost ripped the fabric of my briefs”.

“He didn’t move, he kept staring at me with those eyes… those eyes that moved something deep inside me, and at one point I couldn’t resist any more: ‘Come on, man!’ – I yelled at him, ripping away my underwear – ‘You wanna fuck ass? Go ahead, fuck the shit out of me!’”

~ Man love ~

“He shook his head, looking straight at me: ‘I don’t want to fuck you’ – he said in a low voice – ‘I want to make love to you’. I felt my heart race, I couldn’t think straight. I raised my legs, without ever breaking eye contact with him; and I didn’t say a single word, not even when he entered me, trying to be gentle, but too used to fuck cunts to understand that a man’s hole, especially a virgin one, needs a special care…”

“But the exhilaration of feeling him inside me overcame any possible pain. I arched my hips to meet his hard rod and let it sink as deep as possible into me. We already shared everything, we were best friends, we even shared a woman every now and then; but we never felt joined together more tightly than in that moment”.

“And when he came, he didn’t scream or anything, he just told me, with a voice chocked for the sexual tension: ‘I love you’. When he pulled out of me I realized that my entire chest was covered with my own jizz: he’d made me cum like never before, and I felt like I was living in a dream. I looked at him and he frowned. He spoke, and for the first and last time in our life I heard a timid uncertainty in his voice: ‘Don’t… Don’t you love me, too?’”.

“I suddenly realized that I didn’t reply when he told me he loved me. I couldn’t, my voice was completely gone. I was crazy with love for him and that timid, shy question broke my heart. I hugged him so tight, with my arms and my legs, to never let him go, and… I cried a river, hiding my face into his warm, powerful chest. I felt like every piece of me was finally in place. Now that Caleb loved me, and I loved him, I knew I could finally live my life, my life as a married man, as a father, as a biker… and as Caleb’s lover”.

Rowan’s eyes glistened with tears of joy: “There’s such a passion in your words… You must have loved each other so much!”

Gerry hesitated for a moment: “Aren’t you disturbed by knowing that your father… loved a man? That he loved me?”

“It makes me feel him even closer” – the guy replied with a serene smile – “If he was alive, he would love me even knowing that I… feel attracted by men. You can’t believe how much grief can cause a strict, bigoted father who doesn’t accept his son’s true nature…”. Rowan sighed, looking around that small room that was the scene of Jordan’s cruel punishment [1].

“I’m glad that my father loved you, and I can easily guess why” – Rowan concluded, looking at Gerry and admiring once more his powerful chest, fully covered with dark brown hair streaked with silver. That touch of grey on Gerry’s hair and beard had always been attractive to Rowan. And Gerry’s muscular body, though bearing the signs of more than sixty springs, could be the envy of many a younger man.

Rowan placed his face over Gerry’s furry chest and closed his eyes. The warm skin and the soft hair were so pleasurable against his cheek! The guy’s hand started caressing the bulging pecs and played with the man’s meaty nipple, and he could feel Gerry’s muscles tense under his face.

His hand then moved to the big bulge, gently caressed the growing shaft through the thin fabric of the briefs and then his fingers started sneaking under the elastic waistband.

“No!” – Gerry exclaimed, pushing Rowan away and jumping out of the bed – “I can’t do it! We can’t do it! You could be my son!”

He quickly grabbed his clothes from the ground and rushed out of the door. Rowan opened his mouth to say “Your age means nothing to me!”, but his words died in his throat, the moment he understood that Gerry was not referring to the age difference. He was talking about Jason, the boy who was born the same day as Rowan, and just like Rowan ran away from home at seventeen; but unlike Rowan, Jason met his deadly fate, out of his home, while Rowan found his life. The moment Jason lost his life, Rowan was born anew.

«It’s true, I could be his son…» – Rowan thought, feeling to have broken a magic moment with a stupid mistake. He got off the bed and got dressed, scared by the idea that Gerry might have run away from his life. Rowan felt shattered. He didn’t know why, but he felt bound to that man like with no one else.

~ Run, Rowan! ~

Rowan looked around and felt he couldn’t stay there, in the small bedroom, any more: he needed fresh air! He quickly put on his pants and the shoes, but not the shirt: instead, he wore his father’s leather jacket.

The house was silent, everyone was asleep, and the guy went downstairs, crossed the now dark ballroom and went out. He’d come with the boys, he had no car to go back home (and anyway he didn’t have a driving license), so he started walking slowly towards the town center.

Millions of thoughts crowded his mind. How stupid he’d been, trying a sexual approach with Gerry! «It’s not my fault! He kissed me!» – he tried to justify himself, remembering when, in the parlour, he wore the leather jacket and hugged Gerry, and the man kissed him passionately.

«But he was not kissing me…» – Rowan had to admit – «I was wearing my father’s jacket, he was just reliving a moment of passion with my father… That kiss meant nothing!»

The guy felt an irrepressible anxiety building into him, and sped up his steps along the desert road. The truth was that Rowan felt really attracted by Gerry: he was fatherly, he had a hot body, he’d seen a lot in his life, and… loved his father! Rowan felt he could trust Gerry completely, and knew that Gerry trusted him, but he’d been so stupid to ask for sex to the man, and now… now…

«It can’t end this way!»  – Rowan thought, almost angrily, while his fast walk turned into a light run – «A strange fate made us meet, I can’t let him to disappear from my life!»

“I’m not his son! I’m not Jason!” – the guy whined aloud, starting to run faster and faster, but he knew deep in his heart that Jason’s history was intertwined with his own, just as much Caleb’s history was intertwined with Gerry’s.

By now he was running breathlessly. He ran through the maze of dark alleys behind the Mall, the alleys that had been his home for years, when he lived on the streets. He ran faster, trying to leave his former life behind him, and suddenly he was in front of the old rickety cinema where he’d spent almost his entire childhood, taken care by the owner, old Paul.

“Paul is dead… He can’t tell me what to do any more…!” – Rowan cried out, while his sinewy legs moved at blazing speed. But suddenly Rowan knew what he had to do: after all, there was no other option. Gerry had come into his life to stay forever, any other possibility was unthinkable.

What did Rowan feel for Gerry? What was the man for him? A father? A lover? A friend? And what did Gerry see in him? His lost son? Caleb? Rowan didn’t know, but he knew that he couldn’t do without him, he had to find him, talk to him, hug him, kiss him…

The full moon shone bright in the black sky, pouring his silver light on the streets and on Rowan, who was running, running, running as fast as he could, ignoring the lack of air, ignoring his aching legs.

He ran as if the Devil itself was at his heels, like he used to do before coming to the Cove, when at sunset he ran breathlessly in order to escape his nightmares. But this time he was not running away from his past: he was running toward his future…

~ A handy handyman ~

“Fuck this fuckin’ boiler!” – grumbled Lawrence, the buff handyman, fixing for the third time the faulty boiler at Maison de la Motte. It was late in the night, but he couldn’t stop working, as the house was full of guests. It was hot as hell, down in the basement, and Lawrence was sweating profusely, so he took off his wet tank. His massive chest glistened in the yellowish light of the electric bulb.

With a great effort, he tightened the last bolts and tested the boiler: he had managed to fix it… until the next failure. «Tomorrow I’ll tell to LaCour we need a new boiler, this is older than my grandma!» – he thought resolutely, collecting his tools and hanging them to his tool belt.

“And now, up to the Green Room” – he murmured to himself, as the housekeeper asked him to fix a leaking faucet in one of the empty guestrooms. He went upstairs, without putting on his tank top, as the house was silent and everyone was soundly sleeping. He silently walked the long corridor, counting the doors: “…three, four, five! Yes, it should be the fifth… or was it the fourth? Fuck whoever decided to call the rooms by colour, the Green Room, the Orange Suite, the… Barely Blue Bedroom! If only there was a Dark Room…” – he said with a lustful smirk, grabbing his crotch, remembering the many hot asses he’d fucked in the Dark Room at the Mighty Stud, a popular gay club in East Downtown [3].

He opened the door and entered the room, turned on the light… and froze. The room was not empty! He had obviously entered the wrong room. There was an extremely muscular man sprawled on the bed, sleeping in a loose white brief and a tight t-shirt that seemed in danger of ripping apart under the pressure of the underlying massive pecs.

“What the fuck…?” – Alex blurred, woken up by the sudden intrusion, but when his eyes focused on the buff handyman his frown distended into a randy smile. Alex had always been the most muscular and bulky man of the Cove, but the handyman was a good match for him. The guard felt something stirring in his groin, as the last night, after the ball, Charlie asked to go sleep with the other boys, and he had to go to bed alone, unable to give relief to his roaring horniness.

“Oh! I’m so sorry, sir!” – Lawrence said, while his eyes feasted on Alex’ massive body – “It’s been an unfortunate accident…”

“A fortunate one, I’d say…” – the guard replied, with a lustful smirk. He didn’t know the man’s sexual inclinations, but his glances looked quite… interested. His doubts were totally dispelled when the handyman added, with an urchin grin: “…and I’m not that sorry it happened, after all…”

~ Tug-of-war ~

Alex threw away the bedsheets and stood beside the bed, facing the man. For few moments they silently stared into each other’s eyes, in a sort of tug-of-war: they were both dominant alpha men, both muscular and powerful, both in search of a hot ass to fuck… but only one could prevail!

The guard smiled defiantly, and without a word he started caressing his own torso, over the tight white t-shirt clinging to his muscles like a second skin. He was putting on his show for the handyman, a show that never failed so far. He was sure that the man would instantly get hard as soon as he would’ve stripped naked.

But he needed to stay soft, he wanted the man to be unable to repress a roaring hard-on just looking at his limp cock, thus sealing his doom. «I’ll fuck that ass…» – Alex thought, slowly pulling up the bottom of his shirt, revealing his chiseled washboard abs. Inch by inch, the guard’s hairy torso emerged from underneath the tight t-shirt, until his nipples were in full display under the man’s eyes.

Alex played one of his aces: he brushed his fingers on one of his meaty nipples and uttered a low growl full of repressed lust. He gazed at Lawrence’s crotch, sure to see a bulging erection, but there was no movement whatsoever in his pants.

«He’s a tough one…» – Alex thought with a confident smile – “All the better, it will be more pleasurable breaking in his proud ass…»

The t-shirt fell on the floor, and the guard took a handful of his remarkable manhood through the loose briefs, still concentrating not to get hard. And then he played his masterpiece, the act that made everyone at the Cove, including the elegant Beau [3] and the controlled Wahkan [4], instantly fall for him. His thumbs sneaked inside the elastic waistband, while he shot his most blatant, lustful, alluring glance at the man, and suddenly he tore down the white briefs, making his massive manhood bounce free.

He looked at the man’s crotch with a proud smile… but his grin faded on his lips: the man was still limp, he didn’t get an erection, despite the hot show that always made the boys, and occasionally some men, cream their pants without even touching their cocks.

Alex rose his gaze to Lawrence’s face and saw him flashing a defiant grin: he was fully aware that there was a trial of strength going on, and he didn’t lose it. And now it was his turn…

Lawrence was already bare-chested, and he brushed both his hands over his pecs, and then, unlike Alex, who just brushed his fingers on one nipple, afraid to get hard, he confidently took both his nipples into his fingers and rolled them hard, opening his mouth in a lustful, silent gasp of pleasure. And still his cock stayed limp.

Then he lowered his hands to the waist of his pants, unbuttoned them and lowered the zipper, but without removing his tool belt. A thick bush of brown hair emerged from the open fly. The man quickly removed his shoes, using only his feet, without ever breaking eye contact with Alex, and lowered his pants, revealing a tiny piece of underwear, a sort of elastic pouch, barely holding a remarkable manhood.

He too, just like Alex, took a handful of his manliness, roughly manhandling the straining pouch and uttering a chocked whine of pleasure. And when his hand left the pouch, the hefty cock inside was still soft.

Lawrence didn’t tear down his underwear abruptly, like Alex: he brushed his palm over it, hooked his fingers on one side and started pulling it, slowly setting free his manly attributes from their confinement. The first to fall out were the balls, two large, hairy balls, swollen for the pent-up juice boiling in them. He let his balls swing freely for a little while, shooting at the guard a glance of total confidence. Alex couldn’t tear the gaze away from the hefty gonads swinging from the man’s groin and absentmindedly licked his lips.

Lawrence’s hand moved a little farther and his veiny, thick uncut cock flopped out of the pouch, slapping on the balls.

“Oh, shit… Oh, SHIT!!” – Alex said with an alarmed tone, when his own cock instantly rose to full mast in no more than a couple of seconds. Instinctively, he tried to conceal his erection with his hand, but it was too late: he had lost the fight.

~ The prize ~

Lawrence tore away his pouch and let his tool belt fall on the floor, quickly went closer to Alex and roughly pushed him down on the bed. “In this game it’s the loser who takes it all… sir!” – he growled with a victorious smirk, while massaging his cock to a full hard-on.

Alex was not a man who backed out, but hesitated, because he’d rarely yielded his ass to another man, and the handyman was so well endowed… With a determined glance, he raised his legs, offering his hidden treasure to the victorious man, inviting him to loot it.

“Oh, no, not this way…” – Lawrence said with a tone that sounded a bit too commanding to Alex – “You’re my prize, and I want you on all fours… sir!”

The handyman still addressed Alex as “sir”, but his tone was more mocking than respectful, and Alex was quite pissed off: he didn’t like to lose, and to lose to a man who clearly wanted to humiliate him, fucking him doggy style, making him feel like just an ass to fuck and nothing else.

With a rueful glance, but without uttering a word, Alex rolled around and stood on all fours, bracing himself on the mattress, as for sure the rude man would have soon impaled him without any regard or care. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and stifled a gasp when he felt Lawrence’s mushroom head pressed on his tight anus.

“Come on, man!” – Alex growled, determined to pay his debt, no matter how painful or humiliating it would be – “This is your prize, do your worse!”

But all his rueful thoughts were soon blown away, when he felt the man’s powerful torso gently pressed on his back, and his strong hands lovingly caress his pecs and abs, and a warm voice whispered in his ear: “Why should I do that? This is what I had in mind…”

And with these words, Lawrence gently eased his cock inside Alex, and the guard realized he had used plenty of lubricant so not to give him any pain. The hot cock was thick, but the handyman definitely knew how to handle his weapon, turning it into an instrument of exquisite pleasure.

“Aaahh…” – Alex sighed, and for a moment he felt like he was melting into the man’s strong arms, feeling his cock slowly invading his most intimate recesses and his hands giving him exquisite caresses. The man started fucking the hot ass with a slow but steady rhythm, pushing it in until his groin touched Alex’ firm buttocks, and then applying an additional pressure, so to reach deeper inside the warm cavity, in search of Alex’ sweet spot.

Each thrust of the hard rod sent shivers of pleasure through Alex’ spine, and for the first time in his life he felt almost lost under another man’s sexual power. The buff guard, a man who always took the lead and never gave up on his dominant role, not even the rare times he allowed someone to fuck him, for the first time felt like putty into Lawrence’ hands.

“Oww… yeah… yeah!” – he moaned every time the thick cock brushed over his sensitive prostate – “Fuck me, man… Give me it all!”

“As you wish… sir!” – Lawrence replied, and his tone was not mocking or disrespectful any more: this time it was playful, intimate, almost loving, and Alex felt his last resistance washed away by the waves of pleasure that the man was pouring onto his body and mind.

While the rigid pole pumped relentlessly into his fiery chute, the man’s hands roamed his torso, concentrating on the nipples, playing with the body hair and then sliding down to his crotch, where his untouched cock was standing harder than ever.

“Ah! Jeezz…” – Alex moaned loud when a strong hand curled around his stiff cock and started stroking it, slowly at first, and then in earnest, while the other fingers madly flickered on his meaty nipple. That man was playing him like a piano, pressing all his buttons and quickly bringing him to oblivion, to a delightful place where he would be totally, definitely, hopelessly lost…

Lost! This is how Alex suddenly felt: lost into that man’s hands! With a last burst of manly pride, Alex broke from the dreamy state the sweet fuck had put him in. «This can’t be!» – he though, determined to resist to the exquisite sensation he was feeling – «He won my ass, and that’s all he’ll get!»

With an heroic effort, he ignored the strong hands manhandling his most sensitive body parts and started clenching rhythmically his ass muscles, relaxing while the rod reached his inner depths and tightening his anal ring when he moved out, so to literally milk the big cock and force him to spurt his juice earlier.

Lawrence immediately realized that Alex was engaging him into another trial of strength and smiled, accepting the challenge. His hips started moving faster, pounding harder on Alex’ ass and battering his prostate with increasing vigor, while his hands intensified their relentless massage on the guard’s cock, balls, nipples and torso.

Both men were sweating profusely, trying to resist as best as they could to their need to cum, and doing their best to force the other one to surrender to his orgasm. Alex rose from his position on all fours and stood on his knees, still imprisoned into Lawrence’s strong arms and still impaled on his thick, rigid cock. He moaned loud, realizing he was on the verge of an explosive orgasm, at an inch from his defeat, but suddenly he heard the handyman groan: “Fuck! Oww… FUCK!!”, and felt his cock throb hard inside him. The hands that so far had given him an exquisite massage stopped and the man’s strong arms tightened around his wide torso. He won! He had his revenge! Every spasm, every moan of pleasure of the cumming man behind him were signs of his victory.

~ Another prize ~

When Lawrence’s orgasm finally trailed off, he recoiled and pulled out from Alex’ ass. He took away the condom he was wearing and threw it on the floor. Alex turned around and let himself fall on the mattress, on his back, with his legs wide spread, proudly showing his still stiff and dry cock. He flashed a confident smile to the handyman, without saying anything.

“OK, right is right and fair is fair…” – Lawrence said with a lustful glimpse in his eyes – “So, sir, what’s the price your manhood would like? I’m at your command, sir. Hands, mouth…”

“Chest” – Alex said with a grin – “You have such bulging pecs, with such a deep cleft between them… I’m sure it will easily accommodate my big cock, don’t you think so?”

“Ah! Ah! No one ever asked me that!” – Lawrence laughed, surprised by the unusual request – “Well, there’s a first time for everything, right, sir? But this is your prize…” – he added, passing his fingers through the thick felt of body hair covering his torso – “so, better do things properly…”

He leaned over to the nightstand and took a handful of lubricant, and started smearing into the deep cleft between his bulging pecs and over Alex’ cock. “Fasten your seatbelt, sir, because this is going to be a bumpy ride!”

He lowered his chest over the guard’s hard cock, pressing it between his own chest and the man’s tender groin. As soon as he started shifting his torso over the enflamed meat, Alex hissed, feeling the powerful pecs trapping his sensitive cock into a cage of curly hair. “Shit! Aaahh… yeah, man! Oww FUCK!” – Alex almost yelled, overwhelmed by the strong sensation of the hairy muscles brushing hard onto the most sensitive part of his cock. The abundant lubricant turned the otherwise excessive feeling into an excruciating caress, hard enough to make Alex hiss, but tender enough to make him tremble with pleasure.

Lawrence looked up at Alex’ face, rejoicing his expression of pure pleasure, and moved his chest in a random pattern, back and forth, sideways and in circular motion, taking every moment Alex by surprise. When he realized the guard couldn’t take it any longer, he used his hands to press his own pecs against each other, encasing the cock between them even more, and intensified the back and forth motion of his chest.

“Oww man! Shit! You’re killing me!” – Alex shouted, his body as tense as a violin string – “This is insaaanneeee!!! AAAHH!! FUUUCKKK!!”

The trapped cock shot so forcefully that the streak of sperm easily escaped the slick hairy trap and hit Alex under his chin. Lawrence didn’t waste a single moment and started lapping hungrily Alex’ abs, sucking the manly juice pooling into the creases of his muscles. Alex, totally lost into his overwhelming orgasm, went on moaning and tossing his head from side to side, almost oblivious of the wet tongue lapping his abdomen, but fully, almost painfully aware of the hairy chest still madly brushing over his enflamed cock.

After many endless moments, Alex’ cock finally stopped throbbing and Lawrence recoiled. The two men looked intensely at each other’s eyes, both proud of themselves and in awe for the other.

“Jeez” – Alex whined after a while, groggily moving out of the bed – “It wasn’t a bumpy ride, but a roller coaster! I should be more careful to what I wish… as I could get it!”

Both men laughed merrily, heading to the bathroom to clean themselves while the first rays of the morning sun started flowing through the ample window.

~ A lost boy ~

The dawn surprised Rowan while he was still wandering aimlessly around the town. Too many thoughts, desires and fears crowded in his mind, but there was one thing that kept him going: he had to find Gerry, talk to him, ask for his forgiveness for his clumsy attempt to have sex with him.

Rowan though again and again at what Gerry had said about himself and his life. «Of course he doesn’t want to have sex with me!» – the guy thought, ashamed – «He said that my father was his only male lover, but he’s always been, and still is, a ladies’ man… That kiss he gave me means nothing, in his mind he was kissing my father, not me… But it won’t happen ever more! I must tell him… if only I knew where he lives!”

He couldn’t think straight, but his feet, almost following their own will, brought him to a place he knew well: the warehouse where Gerry worked. It was dawn and it was closed, so Rowan sat on the ground, near the locked entrance, and placed his forehead on his knees. Slowly, his tired mind drifted to a much needed sleep.

“Hey kid, this is no place to stay!” – a harsh voice woke him up after a while. Rowan jumped on his feet, stood tall and proudly replied: “I’m not a kid, my name is Rowan. And I’m waiting for Gerry”.

“Oh…” – the man replied, unlocking the entrance door – “He’s not coming today, he called in sick”.

Rowan was aghast, as if the only chance to meet again Gerry had suddenly vanished forever. He was wrong, of course, but his reeling mind, that so far basked in the certainty to meet Gerry at work that morning, reacted to the unexpected news with a streak of desperation. “Sir… Please, I need to find Gerry…! Maybe you could tell me where he lives…”

“Our employees are granted the required privacy, I can’t give you Gerry’s address, if he didn’t want to give it to you himself. Sorry kid… ehm… Ryan?”

“Please, sir…” – Rowan murmured, and the desperation in his wet eyes and in those two simple words moved something deep into the man’s heart. “Fuck! I hope not to regret telling you… 11, South Mayfair, the door next to the barber shop”.

“Thank you so much, sir! Thanks a million!” – Rowan shouted, already running away. It took no more than ten minutes to get there, running at the blazing speed he had forced his body to get used to in years of nightly desperate runs from his nightmares.

He found the place and explored the small aged building until he spotted Gerry’s name on a doorbell. Hesitantly, he rang the bell, and suddenly all his fears crashed again on him: «Will Gerry want to talk with me? Will he be pissed off by having me at his place? Will he…”

“Rowan!” – Gerry exclaimed opening the door and looking at the guy, who was wearing Caleb’s leather jacket and a worn-out expression on his face. Rowan, looking at the man’s gentle eyes, his beard streaked with silver and his massive, protective arms couldn’t hold it and threw himself into the man’s chest, clinging to it like a lifeboat.

“I’m so sorry! I know I shouldn’t be here!” – Rowan blubbered, sobbing and wetting Gerry’s chest with his tears – “I’ve been silly, but don’t throw me out! Don’t throw me out! Please, daddy, I need you so much!”

“Hey, hey, kid, calm down… No one is going to throw you out…” – Gerry replied with a fatherly tone – “Now come inside, and have a cup a coffee with me”

Gerry’s house was very modest, just a small living room with a kitchenette in a corner and a bedroom furnished with almost nothing but an unmade double bed. The twisted and crumpled bedsheets revealed that Gerry, too, had a restless night. His eyes were as tired and confused as Rowan’s.

~ A lost daddy ~

They sat at the small dining table, sipping their coffee in silence, shyly glancing at each other, uncertain about what to do and what to say. Rowan extended his small, pale hand across the table and held Gerry’s large, brawny hand, and felt with unspeakable joy his strong fingers tightening around his.

“I’m sorry for what I did at Maison de la Motte, when we were in bed together…” – Rowan said with a contrite tone – “I shouldn’t have touched you that way… You are not into man love, you were clear on this point; my father was an exception. I made you run away, I’m so ashamed…”

“I didn’t run away because your feelings and your sexual desire scared me, not at all!” – Gerry replied, with a guilty smirk – “I was scared by my feelings, my desires… Your touch, so tender and intimate, suddenly made me feel something that only your father made me feel. You lit up a fire in me, and it scared me, because it was the same fire that consumed me when Caleb and I made love…”

“I was afraid you would throw me out of your house, when you opened the door” – Rowan confessed – “I thought you were mad at me for what I did…”

“How could I ever throw you out, now that I’ve finally found you again…” – Gerry said, moving his hand up Rowan’s arm and caressing the sleeve of the leather jacket, still bearing the signs of the unmerciful scraping of the hard asphalt.

“Gerry… Gerry!” – Rowan said with tender firmness, snapping the men out of his memories of a distant past. He took both the men’s hands into his and looked straight into his eyes: “I’m not my father, Gerry”.

The aged man unsuccessfully tried to hold his tears: “I know. He’s gone. Caleb is gone. But I loved him so much! And I loved Jason, too, and he’s gone, too!”

“I’m not your son, either” – Rowan said seriously – “I’m not Jason”.

“But I dearly wish you were him…” – Gerry confessed – “I wish I could have again my boy with me, I could be a better father for him! But I failed. I failed as a father with him, and I failed as a husband to my wife. She never forgave me for killing our only son…”

“And I wish I could have again my father with me” – Rowan replied – “He would certainly be a better father than the man who married my mother and raised me. You blame yourself for one single slap to you son… One single slap! You know what my stepfather did to me? He abused me sexually for years, since I was a little child. Sometimes he tied me to the bed. Sometimes he lent my ass to his fellow workers. He tried to break me, forcing me to cum while his humongous cock ripped me apart…”

Gerry was looking at Rowan in horror, and Rowan went on telling him in detail what his stepfather did to him, night after night, without omitting anything, without sugarcoating the sordid, terrible truth. It was painful for Rowan to recall to his mind all those terrible memories, but Gerry had to know, Gerry had to see with his own eyes what a father should really feel guilty for.

~ Daddy’s boy ~

“And what’s worse” – Rowan continued – “I tried to convince myself that his abusive behavior was his way of loving me. But I couldn’t fool myself, or I wouldn’t be unable to sleep at night for years, after running away from home at seventeen. Do you understand, Gerry? Despite the terrible things he did to me, I wanted to believe he loved me! How could possibly Jason think you didn’t love him? No argument, no beating can prevent a boy to know, deep inside, that his father loves him. It’s bred in our bones: a kid needs to feel loved…”

By now, Gerry was crying softly, and hot tears streaked his bearded cheeks. “And do you still need to be loved?” – he asked, with broken voice.

“More than ever” – Rowan replied – “I was lucky enough to meet the men of the Cove, they took me under their wings and helped me a whole lot. They love me, and I love them, but I need more. They can’t give me what I need. I need the father I couldn’t have…”

“Then be my boy…”

Gerry’s words hung in the air for a while, and a sudden silence fell in the room. Both the man and the guy barely breathed, Gerry for his own way too daring proposal, and Rowan because suddenly felt that his life was again at a crossroads.

What meant Gerry with ‘my boy’? A boy like Charlie for Alex? Or a boy like Jason for Gerry? What was offering Gerry to him? Fatherly love, sexual passion, tender affection or a strong friendship?

«Who does he see in me?» – Rowan thought, his mind crowded with doubts – «Jason? My father? Or… me?»

Gerry’s words might mean everything or nothing…

“Yes…” – Rowan heard himself say. He had no idea of what really Gerry meant, but it made no difference: whatever Gerry wanted to be for him, Rowan wanted to have it. A father, a lover, a friend, a mentor, whatever!

“Yes, Daddy” – he repeated under his breath, like in a dream – “I will be your boy… I am your boy”. They stood there in silence, looking at each other, holding their hands across the table; the coffee, now cold, was still filling the cups, while their hearts, now warm, were beating furiously.

“I… I can’t offer you very much…” – Gerry said with a shy tone after a while, looking around the modest apartment.

“Well, we could live at the Cove…” – Rowan said tentatively, and Gerry burst in a roaring laughter, the kind of laughter that always made Rowan feel happy, but this once made his heart shrink. “Me, at the Cove?” – Gerry laughed – “In that huge house with all those refined men? No, no, kid… Like you say, I’m a bear, I need my own lair, a place I can call my own, even if it’s not the Ritz-Carlton…”

Gerry looked at Rowan, who bravely tried to hide a sudden frown: “But I will take care of you, I will help you in any way” – the man said with affection, becoming serious – “And I will love you… I’ll love you, kid… in any way you want me to love you…”

Rowan felt a rush of love for that man who was willing to even bend his true nature, his sexual inclinations, to give him what he wanted. He was such a man! Rowan’s mind had a flash of a hairy chest holding him, a bearded mouth kissing him, an expert, thick cock filling him… but he couldn’t ask that to Gerry. Not yet.

And couldn’t force him to live at the Cove, either, though the mere idea of leaving that place, the only home he’d ever had, and those men and boys who helped him so much was as painful as a stab in his heart.

But he hid his feelings and looked tenderly at Gerry: “I love you for what you just said… But you’re not ready for loving me… that way” – the guy said with a serene smile – “And neither am I. The Cove gave me so much, I just can’t leave them this way, I have to talk to them, explain what I feel… what we feel”.

“And there’s one last thing I have to do before I can truly open my heart to you…” – Rowan concluded with a determined chin – “I have to defeat once and for all my stepfather, show him how strong I’ve become, and send him back to the hell he belongs to. I have to go back to the Cove one last time. Tomorrow. But today… tonight… will you hold me in your arms?”

Gerry slowly stood up, moved closer to Rowan and held him in a tight bear hug that almost took the guy’s breath away. “I will hold you in my arms as long and as often as you want… and even more! You are my boy! My boy!”

It was more than just a hug. It was the desperate solitude of a man who had lost his son and his lover, meeting the desperate solitude of a guy who had lost his father and never knew what true love was. Two desperate solitudes that in that brief moments vanished in the thin air in bright sparkles of hope and love.

The small, squalid kitchenette never looked so beautiful like in that moment. The still air resounded of the heartbeats of the man and the guy holding each other, filled with a love that both of them thought was lost forever.

But deep inside Rowan’s soul, the dark demons that hunted him for years were gathering up to fight their last battle…

Footnotes and references:
[1] See Chapter 22, ~ Unforgiveable sin ~
[2] See Chapter 2, ~ The ‘Mighty Stud’ ~
[3] See Chapter 11, ~ Morning lust ~
[4] See Chapter 31, ~ The Sioux vs. The Guard ~

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(End of Chapter 54 – Please proceed to Chapter 55)