Rowan's Journey to Manhood

AUTHOR’S NOTE

Synopsys (*** Spoiler Alert! ***)

Additional downloads (PDF)

• Cast of Characters (with images)
• The Cove – Floor Plan
• Book 01 (Chapter 1) with bookmarks

≈ ROWAN’S NIGHTMARE ≈

~ An abusive dad ~

“Daddy, no… Please, Daddy, it hurts… No… NO…! AAAAHH!!”

The piercing scream, as always, threw Rowan out of his restless sleep. He sprang up, gasping loud, trying to catch his breath. He lowered his long, sinewy legs on the ground and sat on the bed side, heavily panting. Staring blankly at the wall in front of him, through the curtain of his long black hair draping in locks in front of his eyes, Rowan tried to focus on reality, but  all he could do was relive his nightmare in an endless loop.

Once again, in Rowan’s mind, the man entered the bedroom, as he did every day at sunset. He flashed his ice-cold pale blue eyes to the kid lying on the bed and his mouth rippled in a lustful smirk. He slowly removed his dirty plaid shirt, and then his sweaty, worn-out tank, revealing his broad, muscular chest, covered with a thick layer of black body hair.

Years before, the kid used to look in awe at those bulging pecs, the ripped abs, the wide shoulders and the powerful biceps, he felt safe in those strong arms and felt loved when he could sleep with his face nestled in that huge furry chest. Once, he loved those powerful muscles, that stubbled chin, those pale blue eyes, but now they scared the hell out of him.

The man unlaced his work boots and kicked them away, then unbuttoned his pants and lowered them, slowly revealing his old white briefs, stained with dried piss. Underneath, the obvious bulge of his manhood twitched with anticipation. He languidly moved one hand on his bare chest, playing with his nipples, and uttered a low moan of pleasure; with the other hand, he started caressing his growing bulge, harder and harder, until the big cock head peeked out of the worn-out waistband, oozing pre-cum.

“I know you want it, kid” – he growled to the boy – “You want your daddy’s cock, uh?”. He lowered the waistband, inch by inch, making his hard hefty cock spring menacingly to full attention. He climbed on the bed and knelt between the boy’s legs; leaning forward, he pressed his hands over the kid’s wrists, pinning him down, and pierced him with his ice-blue blazing eyes. “No need to tie you to the bed, kid... You’ve become a good boy, you won’t run away, right?”.

The man recoiled, rubbing his calloused hands all over the kid’s body, until they rested on his hips. Then, with a tug, he roughly ripped away the kid’s underwear, leaving him completely naked. The boy didn’t dare to move a single muscle and stood still, unable to do anything but stare wide-eyed at the man’s huge body towering over him, his rugged face, his stubbled jaws, his hairy torso, his meaty nipples, his huge veiny cock...

The boy felt the man’s hands moving down his thighs, his knees, his calves. Once more, he tried in vain to put up a fierce resistance to the strong hands parting and raising his legs, but the man effortlessly pushed them back, further and further, until the young ass was in full display, raised and vulnerable. He spat on the puckered hole and pointed his cock on the tightly shut sphincter.

The kid, pinned down by the heavy muscular man, was helpless. He knew what was coming, but could do nothing but beg...

“Daddy, no… Please, Daddy, it hurts… No… NO…! AAAAHH!!”

Rowan pressed his hands hard over his eyes, trying to clear his mind from that nightmare that so every often broke into his restless sleep. Only, it was not a nightmare. It was a memory.

Waking up couldn’t stop the crude images from crowding his mind, he couldn’t forget the piercing pain he felt every time that huge cock speared his ass, the rancid smell of his stepfather’s sweat, his hideous grunts while he pumped his man tool into him, his beastly roar when he finally shot his juice deep into his bowels. He could still feel his sweat dripping on his face, and the slimy fluid oozing out of his loosened anus once his stepfather finally pulled out.

~ Run away! ~

Rowan, still sitting on the bed, wearing only his underwear, glanced at the small window and saw the sun slowly setting into the ocean. In alarm, he stood up and looked at the door: «He’s coming! He’s coming!» – Rowan thought, in panic.

Quickly, he sneaked through the back door without even dressing and rushed to the now deserted beach. He started running on the wet shore, faster and faster, trying to escape the horror that chased him. He ran as fast as his strong, sinewy legs let him, ignoring the fatigue, ignoring the pain, in desperate certainty that if he had slowed down his stepfather would have caught him and hurt even more.

After more than a mile he eventually stopped, breathless, and stood on the sand, amidst the desert beach, catching his breath and clearing his mind. A gentle sea breeze caressed his face and flowed between his long raven hair; his pale skin, covered with sweat, shone bright under the full moon light. Apart from the sound of the waves, there was silence all around him. He was safe.

Once again, Rowan angrily blamed himself for being so stupid, so irrational. Damn, he had run away from his abusive stepfather when he was 17, now he was almost 30, but still he couldn’t bury his nightmares and go on with his life. He still remembered too vividly the horror he had been put through since... he didn’t even know when.

Suddenly, Rowan felt dirty, he felt his stepfather’s rancid sweat still over him and his disgusting semen still into him; without thinking twice, he rushed into the fresh water and started swimming hard, fast, desperately trying to wash away the stinky sweat and the slimy semen, and wipe away the memory along with them. He swam back, along the shoreline, until he was too tired to go on.

He sighed when his feet again touched the sand. Slowly, he walked back home – if ever the basement utility room he could sneak into two weeks before could be called ‘home’... After the frantic run and the long swim he felt much calmer, but still he didn’t dare to go inside; instead, he dried himself with a towel and put on the clothing he had purposely left outside the back door.

~A long lost beauty ~

Rowan headed to the ramshackle cinema run by his friend Paul, a kind old man who somehow took Rowan under his wing. If the cinema was old, the films that were being shown there were even older: nothing more recent than the 50’s had ever appeared on Paul’s big screen.

Rowan loved that place! Since he was a child, he went to that old cinema almost every day. His stepfather never cared for Rowan’s education, and those ‘Old Hollywood’ movies had always been the only ‘school’ Rowan ever attended. He spent entire days immersed in magnificent houses, elegant dresses, lavish parties, polite conversations and romantic plots. Of course young Rowan couldn’t afford the price of the ticket, but Paul, in all those years, always let Rowan sneak into the cinema through the staff door.

Approaching the cinema, Rowan looked at old Paul, sitting in the ticket office; with more than 80 springs behind his back, Rowan feared the day he should say the last goodbye to that man, who had always been for him more than a father.

Paul raised his watery eyes and winked at him with a knowing smile: “We have ‘Gone with the Wind’ tonight, kid!”. He knew that this movie was one of Rowan’s favorites; the guy had already watched it countless times, but he just couldn’t get enough of the serene and classy atmosphere of that old movie.

Rowan thanked him, briefly caressing his hand through the office window; then, he slowly headed to the familiar old foyer, but Paul stopped him: “Hey, kid, aren’t you forgetting anything?”. Rowan stood still, puzzled: so far, Paul always granted him a free entry, knowing that he couldn’t afford the ticket. He turned to the old man with an embarrassed look on his face, but Paul was smiling at him with affection: “It’s a long show, kid, you need some support...”. From under his desk, he took a succulent hot dog, still warm, and offered it to the young guy.

~An unexpected encounter ~

For the following couple hours, Rowan could finally forget everything and dive into the peaceful, beautiful atmosphere of Tara and the Twelve Oaks, the elegant dresses, the well-mannered characters and the genteel dialogs. At the intermission, he headed to the restroom; while washing his hands, still sticky for the hot dog sauce, Rowan looked absently at the mirror and saw the door of the only used stall slowly open up.

Inside, there was a man in his late 30’s, sprawled on the toilet. He wore a denim sleeveless shirt, completely unbuttoned, revealing a massive muscular chest. Rowan’s eyes followed the man’s left hand playing with his right nipple, then moved down, to the thick uncut cock, rock hard, poking out of the open fly of a pair of old Levi’s.

The men was slowly stroking his huge meat. Rowan looked mesmerized at the strong hand moving rhythmically up and down the long shaft, the foreskin retracting and then closing around the big mushroom head. He rose his eyes and saw the man looking intensely at him through the mirror, his eyes filled with lust. He nodded at Rowan and said in a low voice “I could use some help here...”.

Rowan turned around, feeling his heart thump hard in his chest. The man was gorgeous, with his chiseled torso, his muscular arms and his huge man tool. Rowan faltered: he certainly was not the kind of man cruising public toilets in search of occasional sex. But the man’s eyes pierced him, making his will go weak. As in trance, Rowan moved closer and dropped to his knees between the men’s legs.

“I want to see more...” – Rowan said under his breath, reaching to the man’s bare chest with trembling hands. With a confident grin, the man pushed the shirt behind his back and let it fall down. Rowan gasped and traced with his fingers the sharp contour of the pecs and the abs, playing with the light hair covering the man’s torso and caressing his pointy nipples.

~Rowan gives in to passion ~

He then lowered his hands to the man’s hips, grabbed the jeans and pulled them down to his knees. The man’s swollen balls hung low below the rigid cock, slowly bouncing up and down, following the man’s hand massaging the long shaft. Again, Rowan faltered. At his age, he was not a rookie, and he had occasional sex every now and then, but... making love to a total stranger in a public toilet?? «This is not my place», thought Rowan, «This is not me. I must go away. Now!» His mind ordered to his legs to stand up, but his body didn’t move.

He stared again at the man’s eyes and he looked back at him, piercing him deep inside with his clear brown eyes. Rowan saw a sparkle flashing in those eyes, a commanding call, a promise... and gave in. Throwing away his doubts and his caution, the guy lowered his head to the man’s balls, still hanging out like an inviting forbidden fruit, and crushed his nose and mouth into them. They smelled clean, apart from a faint scent of sweat, and the guy eagerly sucked them in his mouth, lavishing the rugged hairy skin with his tongue.

Then he wrapped his hand on the long foreskin and slowly pulled it down, looking rapt at the pink glans coming out from his velvety lair. He started moving his fist up and down, with growing intensity, rejoicing the moans of pleasure of the man. Soon his pumping hand was joined by his mouth; he savoured the manly taste of the hot tender skin and darted his tongue all around the sensitive corona. His tongue pressed hard the swollen glans against his palate, back and forth, faster and faster, sending shivers of pleasure to the groaning man.

Sensing the upcoming orgasm, Rowan raised his head from the swelling cock and slowed down his hand. “Yeah, make love to my big cock, stud” – said the man – “Come on, take it all...”

Rowan licked the entire shaft down to the balls, and tickled them with the tip of his tongue; then moved back up, opened his mouth and let the entire cock slide down into his throat. Suddenly he gagged, and recoiled, but soon he tried again, until he could bob his head all the way up and down the long meat rod.

After a while, Rowan wrapped again his fist around the rigid cock and kept on stroking it, while he massaged the sensible glans with his lips and tongue, driving the man wild. “Jeez, I can’t hold any more...” – the hunk growled – “Almost there... Yeah... Yeah... Aaaaahh!”.

Rowan backed up, still pumping furiously his fist on the man’s cock, and raised his eyes to his face. The man held his breath and threw his head back, his eyes tight shut, intimately enjoying that delicious moment when the entire body tenses up, preparing for the upcoming ejaculation; his cock swelled and jerked in Rowan’s hand and then started spurting thick ropes of sperm that flew up in the air. The hunky man let out a chocked “Aaahh!... Fuck... Aaaahh!” and reclined his head on his heaving chest, still keeping his eyes closed, until the orgasm subsided, leaving him drained and panting.

~Humiliation ~

Finally, the man reopened his eyes and briefly looked at Rowan, but immediately looked away. “Thanks man, it’s been wild. See you around!” – he said, grabbing his shirt and trying to stand up. “Wait”, said Rowan, pushing him back down. Still holding the man’s cock in his hand, the guy leaned forward, picked some toilet paper and gently cleaned the sensible cock head and the entire shaft from the dripping sperm and saliva.

Then he pulled the foreskin until it closed around the glans and let the limp cock go.  “Here. The first obligation of a gentleman to his manhood is to keep it clean and dry”. The man looked down at Rowan with a puzzled look, and then, without a word, put back his cock in his pants and headed to the door.

Alone in the bathroom, Rowan frowned, uneasy and irritated. He was not used to give occasional pleasure to man, especially in places like this, but the man was so gorgeous, so... manly! His eyes were so commanding, and when he looked at him, through the mirror, there was a sort of... connection, a mutual understanding.

He had stroked and sucked this guy, bringing him to an explosive orgasm, kneeling on the dirty floor, and asked for nothing but seeing him writhing with pleasure. Hell, the least he could do in return was to share his pleasure with him! But no, he had kept his feelings for himself, hiding behind his tightly shut eyes. He had been selfish, and made Rowan feel... humiliated!

Rowan looked again, in his mind, at the desolating scene, as shot from an overhead camera: himself on his knees, stroking with passion the spurting cock, and the man, with his head thrown back and his eyes tight shut, enjoying the powerful orgasm on his own.

«Damn, when will I learn?» – Rowan thought bitterly. But after all, who was to blame if not himself? In a gloomy mood, he headed to the door and glanced at the mirror: “This is what happens when you expect too much from men...”, he muttered to himself.

~ “A world in which there's no place for me” ~

When Rowan went back to the main hall, the intermission had long ended, and the projection had resumed. On the screen Ashley was talking to Scarlett, in what Rowan believed was the most heartbreaking scene of the entire movie. In a dilapidated wooden shack, Ashley was voicing his intimate struggles, his tormenting pain in surrendering to a miserable reality: the crudeness of the Civil War had shattered forever the gentle world that Ashley felt as his own, that was breeded in his very bones. That world was gone, never to come back.

“I'm afraid of life becoming too real... losing the beauty of that life I loved...” – Rowan said silently, feeling tears welling in his eyes while moving his lips in sync with the pale, hurting Ashley – “Now I find myself in a world which for me is worse than death. A world in which there's no place for me”.

Rowan sighed, then turned his back to the screen and left. No time to mourn the long lost beauty Ashley loved so much: he had some work to do. Just like Ashley, he had no choice but to struggle and find a place for himself in this world.

It was always hard for Rowan to find a job, because his troubled mind didn’t let him sleep at night; when the setting sun gave way to the darkness of the night, he had to run out, away from home, no matter what. So, Rowan always looked for small manual jobs that could be done at night.

Lately, a small delivery company had asked him to lend a hand unloading the incoming lorries and loading the smaller delivery vans. Small wage and long work hours, but at least in few days he would be able to buy something to eat, when the boss would give him the weekly check. He quickly walked to the company storage area and worked hard all night long.

~ Home... sort of ~

The sun was rising when Rowan got back home. He sneaked through the metal door with the broken lock and entered the small utility room. Apart from an old water pump and a boiler, the room only contained a small camping bed and a few empty wooden crates. Behind a short wall there was a toilet, a small sink and a rusty shower. Not the Ritz-Carlton but at least he had a roof over his head, and it was free.

He felt uneasy, though, knowing that he was not supposed to stay there, being it private property; but obviously no one ever came down there: when he first found that place, it was a mess, the floor covered with broken bottles, syringes and cigarette butts, the walls strained with any kind of bodily fluids, the toilet clogged and dirty. It took him almost a week to clean it up, and now the small utility room was... his home.

Rowan took a long shower, dried himself with a towel, rolled it over his hips and crushed on the bed, exhausted.

And this – almost naked and asleep – is how young Charlie would have found him, few hours later.

* * * * * * * *

(End of chapter 1 – Please proceed to Chapter 2)