Remember When

I remember watching Alex, this kid who always sat off by himself? All through elementary school he was the one with short black hair and skin so fair it seemed to glow white.  The girls use to tease him for the way he had that cowlick at the front, a small area of hair that stood straight up right over his left eye.  And it had been cut so short on the sides you could see his scalp. His old man was ex-Marine and all of the boys had the worst haircuts, just buzzed right off.

Alex was always picked last for any games during recess for he was so uncoordinated and so skinny, even worse than Drew. Damn, his clothes just hung off of him.  He was the youngest of four and his clothes always looked worn, never anything new. His family did not have a lot of money and his clothes were handed down from his two older brothers. Even his oldest sister wore an older brother's clothes from time to time.  But I remember in sixth grade how Alex had began to grow tall and I...well at the time I couldn't explain it. He intrigued me, if you will.

We rode the same bus to school, I getting on first then after the bus went through my community and made its way through Greene's Village (you know that small cluster of houses over on State Road 264 just before Highway 87 heading toward town.  There must be twenty or more homes along that stretch of road, all really close together, or closer than anything else out here.  Some of those houses were old even back then, leaning on their piers, roofs sagging with shingles missing in a lot of areas. I remember Alex's home was one of the worst, one of the houses that was built off to the rear of that property, their drive just squeezed up between two other houses. My family wasn't rich by any means, none of us farm families were, but man I remember watching Alex and his brothers and sister getting on the bus wondering what it was like for them. That house they lived in was so small I don't know how six people could live in it.

By this time I had shunned him so much he wouldn't have anything to do with me even when I tried to talk to him. I knew I deserved it but the way he ignored me when I spoke actually hurt my feelings more than I could admit at the time. I knew we had been worse to him and he had thought I was setting him up for some teasing of some sort. I found this out later.

It was seventh grade that Alex threw me for the biggest loop. You remember when we all showed up for our first day of Middle School. Damn, we thought we were all grown up. Funny to think of it now; we didn't know shit. But I knew Alex was different. And I knew I was too.

When he showed up I couldn't believe it. He must have grown six inches over the summer. We were just twelve year old snot nosed brats but Alex was different. I know, I know, I've already used the word 'different' once but I don't know any other way to describe it. I don't know what happened during that summer but I do know his old man had a heart attack and Alex, Ashley and Lamar all showed up looking so different. Ashley had cut her hair so short and pierced her ears. She even had her left eye brow pierced. Alex and Lamar had let their hair grow out. It was over their ears and down almost in their eyes. Lamar had pierced his ears too. Louis, their oldest brother had finished the year before and was gone. They didn't even know where he went; still don't.

I can remember being on the bus when we pulled up to the Village and stopped. I didn't think Alex was out there, just his sister who was in the ninth grade that year. There were ten or so from the Village who got on the bus and Alex had been last. He ambled down the aisle and just as he got half way down to where I had been sitting he pushed his hair back and I saw his face.

I had found myself holding my breath and staring. Since their stop was one of the last the bus was nearly full and Alex had came all the way to my seat and was standing there looking at me.

"Can I sit down or am I not good enough?" Alex had sarcastically stated and I suddenly realized I was sitting in the middle of the seat. I was so embarrassed for I knew I must have been staring at him like he was an alien or something.

"Yeah...I'm sorry" I stammered as I slid over. I looked straight ahead for a few miles as we headed toward the school. Alex was quiet and I saw he was doing something, his hand moving around and I eventually had to look. I glanced out of the corner of my eye and saw he was drawing. It was some mythical looking thing with wings and dark eyes and large claws.

"Shit, that's good" I had uttered. He had just looked up at me. I think he was shocked I would speak to him.

"Thanks" he mumbled and went back to drawing. He didn't try to hide it or nothing so I sat there watching him.

I watched him for the next four years. His hair got longer till it hung to his shoulders and the front would fall over his eyes. And he grew taller. By the eleventh grade he was the tallest guy in our class. Six foot three. The basketball coach begged him to come out for the team but Alex told him 'hell no' and that was that. His clothes didn't fit well, for Lamar and Louis had been average in height. Lamar was my height of five ten and I think Louis had been shorter so their handed down clothes were too small for Alex. He had let the hems out on all of his jeans and typically wore this old pair of black boots that hid how short the legs of his jeans were but nothing could hid how short his shirts were in the sleeves and the tails. Alex took to wearing t-shirts mostly which for me were the best.

When ever he stretched or reached up those t-shirts would ride up revealing his stomach. I was watching him more intently by then, would show up at the last minute to class knowing the only seats remaining would be those close to him. There were a couple of girls who tried to flirt with him and I watched feeling helpless.  But after a month or so I noticed how Alex would talk to them but he didn't return their flirtations. Not once did I see him try to hook up with any of the girls for a date. But I played the game, did what was expected, but never got to first base with any of the girls I went out with during that year. By year's end I think some of the girls were beginning to talk for by the end of year school dance none of them would go out with me.  I pretended to be upset around Charlie and Mark, complaining how they turned me down but now I can tell ya I was so relieved. I didn't want to go with any of them. I wasn't even going to the dance till I heard Alex was going to be one of the DJs.

I couldn't wrap my mind around it, the idea of Alex doing that but then I knew very little about him. Really, he was an enigma to me. Someone who fascinated me in ways I wouldn't admit even to myself. I told myself I wanted to look like him, the way he wore his black hair long, the way he wore his clothes in such a grungy alternative way and those black boots he wore, something no one else at our school wore, but what I really wanted was for him to hang out with me. I wanted us to hang out together.

You remember when they built the multi-purpose building for the auditorum and gym which is not particular good for either? That is where the dance was held that year. The lights were either too bright or not bright enough. But I remember the tables on that low stage with the CD players and some other equipment. Someone had rented the gear from some shop in Montgomery. The first guy to play was from Greenville. He played all the stuff we were familiar and the gym floor filled up with most of our classmates dancing away the night. I stood off to the side hiding in one of those dark spots constantly scanning the room looking for Alex. It was after an hour or so when the first guy moved over and I saw him, Alex, come from backstage to the tables. The song playing dropped in volume and another beat rose up, a faster beat, deeper in base and soon Alex's music was playing. It was different, to us at least, and at first eveyone on the floor just stood there watching Alex. He didn't notice them at first, headphones on, head down so we couldn't even see his face from his hair covering it. But he pushed the volume up as the tempo increased and soon the sound seemed to explode from the speakers and when he looked up brushing his hair out of his eyes he began to bounce on his toes. Up and down his body moved in rhythm to the music and when he held up one hand and counted off the beats through a slow section I saw the crowd begin to move, to fall in with Alex as he guided them to faster and faster beats. After a few minutes everyone was dancing like I've never seen them do before. Alex would put on some song and flip off the headphones so he could dance around behind the tables, back and forth he moved, his long arms outstretched, his feet moving in step to the beat. His head rocked up and down and as I watched him I found myself moving around the perimeter of the room till I was at the foot of the stage, only four steps up from the main floor off to the far side. I could see him fully, just behind the tables.

I don't know how long I was there before I realized I was rocking on my feet, my hands moving around in small gestures, nothing as bold as Alex, but I was mimicking him, moving in time with his movements. When he finally noticed me he smiled at me. Not a friendly kind of smile but one that says he had conquered me, had me hooked.

I wish I could say I went up on the stage with him, but I didn't for I was afriad. I knew what the others said about Alex, thinking him weird or strange, or worse, queer.  That was the one that freaked me out the most, the one that ate at me, for I had known for some time, when I was honest with myself, that Alex may not be queer but I was. I was gay and had done nothing to admit it, nothing to know what it meant to me, nothing but pretend I was anything but gay.

Our senior year was a year of such missed opportunities and it was all my fault. You know we eventually get together but that came later when I was a bit more mature and a bit more secure with myself. But things could have been different, maybe even better than they are now. But how can any of us look back with such regret?  How can we try to imagine what never was to be?  I can't, not now, not with how things ultimately turned out. But I did have to beg for forgiveness, and beg I did.

I had gotten my grandfather's old truck that summer when he finally decided to buy himself a new one. It was a fifteen year old Chevy, still in good shape except for the passenger side rear fender. It had been dented in just in front of the rear wheel.  The interior was beginning to show wear, especially the driver's seat but it ran good and let me avoid having to step foot on that fucking school bus again.  I hated riding the bus and my senior year I was finally free of it.  But not Alex.

I remember the first day of school, those of us with wheels showing up early enough to hang out outside and catch up with everyone, especially those we didn't see often or not at all during the summer.  We watched the last two or three buses arrive. They went to the middle school first then made the short drive over to the high school. I recognized the bus for my route, number 103 with its bent exhaust pipe and lower body panel behind the rear wheel from where it had slid into a ditch two years before. I saw everyone stand up and make their way toward the front. I remember being able to pick Alex out, the one person who had to walk bent over. I remember how he surprised me once again when he stepped down out of the bus. His hair was cut short on the sides, close to the scalp but the top was still long, hanging down in front of his face. And it was dyed or tinted in some way. The sun reflected off of it purple. I saw the others look at him, pointing and whispering among themselves. I knew what they were saying, heard it all in the past and would hear it all school year: freak, fag, cocksucker, and so many other derogatory adjectives I couldn't begin to remember them all. It was like a game with some to see who could up with some new insult to hurl at Alex as he walked down the corridor or arrived in class or made his way to the corner of the cafeteria away from everyone else. In the past I was guilty of taking part, of blending in with the others as I tried to be like them. But not this year, not this time.

I was different that year too.

But no one treated me like a parriah, didn't call me names or ostrasize me, at least not till the last month of school. I had cut my hair short, almost like a crew cut only longer on top. It had been blonde when I was young but had darkened up to a light brown but it had been easy to lighten it up, dye it a dirty blonde. My dad hit the roof, asked me what the hell but after a day or so he seemed to forget it. Mom said it was just a phase and ignored it. Then I got my ears pierced and the fireworks began anew.  By the time school started they had seemed resigned to what I had done. There were the sly comments, the wondering aloud how long I could keep the hoops in my ears or when I'd get tired of dyeing my hair.  

But I didn't; not during that senior year. It was small steps, small incremental steps where I was finding myself; expressing myself.

I ordered Docs online, the traditional black boots and for two weeks before school I wore them all the time scuffing them up and breaking them in. I wanted them to look like Alex's boots. A broken-in worn look. I didn't have the courage to go up to him, didn't do anything to make him notice me for that was a line I had not figured out how to cross. It took three days before Alex noticed my boots.

It was English, fifth period and I was later than usual getting to class and had to sit toward the front.  Alex came in right after me and as he walked down the aisle to my right I saw him hesitate, almost stop by my desk. I glanced up and saw his eyes on my boots. I couldn't help it; I moved my foot and he looked up. We looked at each other for the briefest of moments then he moved on back behind me.

He told me later that is the first time he really noticed the changes I had made to myself. The lighter hair color and the different cut. And the ear rings, the stainless steel hoops in each ear. He hated me for it at first. How I made this change and no one seemed to care, how none of the guys called me a faggot or a freak. I hadn't realized how much it had hurt him. The name calling, the way he was ostrasized as if there was something really wrong with him. He blamed his parents for his lot in life.

Alex finally had clothes that really fit him for without his brothers and sister at home to cloth as well his mother could afford to buy him a few garments. He had three changes of clothes. I know. I counted them and felt guilty for it.

Therefore it was spring before I finally broke through this invisible barrier that existed between us. I had grown moody during the year, no longer willing to go along with the others, no longer interested in pretending to want to date one of the girls but I did not do anything to reveal I was gay. It was the final step I was not prepared to take in high school. But I did find myself slowly isolated from the others, invited less and less till not at all to parties or trips to the lake to swim or just to head over to Greenville to see a movie.

It really was easy to separate myself from the others. Too easy.

But let's move to the whole point of this. It was the third of May, a Saturday that began sunny, temperatures quickly rising during the day and I had gotten bored at home, unable to play any more video games, unable to watch any more television or surf around online. So I put on a pair of jeans, a t-shirt, my boots and headed to town. I knew there wasn't shit to do except to cruise around, hit the burger joint or walk around downtown aimlessly. I did all three.  I had gone down one side of Main Street, both blocks of it, crossed the street and was strolling back looking in the storefronts, more vacant than occupied when I saw Alex and his mom come out of the bank.

Can't you take me home before you go? Alex was saying to his mom. She replied something about he should go with her to see Lamar. Then they crossed the street and I couldn't hear anything else that was said but I know Alex refused to go with her and was actually going to walk the six miles back to their home. Six miles along roads with tall grassy shoulders and traffic moving at sixty miles an hour or faster.

I made it back to my truck and was easing back down Main Street when I saw Alex's mom pass heading out of town, north toward the interstate, and she was alone. I wondered at the time where Alex was at if not with her. I turned south heading for home. The light caught me at the last intersection of downtown and as I sat there I saw Alex, up ahead, walking down the sidewalk. I tightened my grip on the steering wheel and knew this was it. If I was ever to make some connection to this person who has intrigued me for years this was it. No one was around to judge me, to make some sly comments or insinuation. The light changed and I eased forward till I was nearing Alex and I slowed then pulled over stopping next to him.

"Hey, you need a ride?"

"What?"

Alex looked at me like I had spoken some alien language.

"Do you need a ride? Come on man, hope in. I'm not going to give you shit" I said in earnest. Alex stopped and looked at me and I could see him trying to figure out what I was up to. It seemed to take him forever to finally decide it was okay to get in my truck and I had struggled to supress a desire to smile as he climbed into my truck.

For most of the drive we sat in silence. He was trying to figure out why I was suddenly nice to him and was guarded, afraid I was going to do something mean. I, on the other hand, was trying to figure out what to say, how to break the silence between us. It seemed like an impenetrable wall. I wanted to tell him I was sorry, that it was wrong how he had been treated; how I treated him.  I wanted to tell him I thought we had things in common, that I thought we were alike more than we were different.  But I didn't say any of those things.

"Come on Alex, relax. I'm giving you ride for fuck's sake."

It was the wrong thing to say, the wrong tone and the conceit was obvious to me as soon as I said it.

"Let me out" Alex had replied.  Luckily we were close to his house for he threatened to jump out while we were still moving making me pull over onto the shoulder. I apologized, told him it wasn't what I meant and I'd take him on to his house. So I sat there and watched Alex shove the door open and step out.

"Fuck off, Jason. Just leave me alone in the future."

Yeah that first time together was a fucking disaster.  I sat on the side of the road and watched Alex walk down the shoulder then cross the road and disappear into the trees that lined the back of the Village.

The last four weeks of school were a blur. Getting ready for graduation, struggling with one class to keep my grade up and then there was Alex avoiding me more than before, refusing to even sit any where near me in class.  I didn't know what to do. I was too scared to approach him at school, afriad the others would see and make some connection, figure out what I was up to; that it would suddenly become so obvious. I had resolved to myself there was nothing to do for I had truly, royally, fucked it up.

For three weeks after graduation I had been kept busy helping dad on the farm with one task after the next but rains set stopping most of the work that needed to be done.  I moped around the house. Boredom, loneliness, fear of where things were going for me made me more restless than usual. Mom and dad saw it, knew something was up. Mom called me into the kitchen.

"Jason, you need to get out this house before you drive us all crazy. Why don't you call up one of your friends and go to Montgomery for a movie or go down to the beach. You leave this afternoon and stay till Sunday."

She actually had suggested I go somewhere for the weekend.

"Okay...I'll see if one of the guys can go" I replied, lying for I knew none of them would go with me, not now after the way I pulled away from them this past year. Besides I didn't want any of them to go with me. I went online to see what movies were playing and where. Then on a whim I searched for any entertainment happening that weekend. There was some music festival down at this amphitheater at the beach. I saw the list of bands playing, some I really liked, so I purchased a ticket for the weekend, got a hotel room, packed up a gym bag and headed out.

It took over three hours to get to the beach and I quickly got my bearings. There are very few roads and I quickly found my hotel back inland a ways. The festival was to begin that night at 8 and I had just enough time to change clothes and grab something to eat.

The festival was great. Everyone was dancing around in front of the stage till they were sweaty. It was a typical hot gulf coast night. I moved around in the crowd and I admit to checking out the guys. For the first time I felt a sense of freedom, like I was not under some microscope. I made my way to a vendor that sold only sodas, the beer line monitored too strictly to even try. I was making my way through the crowd when I saw him, Alex standing just in front of me. He towered over the guys around him. I started to swing wide around him thinking I should leave him alone but my feet kept taking me striaght to him till I was standing byside him.

He looked different and I noticed he had cut his hair different. It was no longer dyed and the sides were still cut close but the top was cut shorter too. Similar to my own. He was wearing a white shirt and jeans. When I was beside him I noticed the shirt was unbuttoned and he had on some mesh tank top revealing his body. He had filled out more than I realized and for a moment I let my eyes scan down his chest, his white skin such a contrast to the black mesh fabric. I made myself turn back to the stage but over and over I cut my eyes over to his tall lean body.

He glanced down at me then turned back toward the stage.

"What the fuck do you want?"

I deserved that and actually laughed.

"I want to apologize; I didn't mean to be a dick the other day...in fact I'm sorry I treated you the way I did all through school."  I said it, easily as that as I kept my eyes on the band playing afriad to look at him. I actually thought he would walk off, expected it, but he stood there rocking on his feet.

"You really like this band?" Alex asked me after what seemed like an eternity.

"Yeah...I discovered them last winter online. And the next two bands after them."

He nodded then took a drink of a beer.

"How did you get that?" I asked. He smiled at me as he reached into his pocket pulling out a driver's license. Kendell Lamar Reynolds was the name on it and I realized he had a license from his older brother. I saw the difference immediately but then realized in the small poorly taken photo they did look a lot alike.

"He gave you his driver's license?"

"He thought he lost it and got another. When he found it he sent it to me" Alex replied.  "What something better than that?" he asked pointing with beer bottle toward the soda I held.

"Yes" I replied as I pulled out a few bills.

For the next couple hours and as many beers we moved among the crowd in front of the stage just enjoying the music. We didn't talk much except to say something about a particular band or a song one of them were preforming. And that barrier I felt between us seemed to erode away, slowly, bit by bit. The crowd pushed us against each other as we danced around and it was nice, this casual contact, superficial as it was and as the night wore on everyone seemed to be getting looser, more care free. Guys took off their shirts and the contact within the crowd, the bumping of sweaty bodies and gestures acknowledging each other created an atmosphere that was intimate in some indescribable way. Erotic even...or at least to me. Alex had the white shirt tied around his waist revealing his long lean upper body. The way his chest tapered down to his narrow waist and how the only hair on his body was the thick black underarm hair. When he held his arms up the tank top stretched up and I saw how low on his hips his jeans sat and the light trail of dark hair going from his navel down into his jeans.

I pulled my own t-shirt off and tucked it into the back of my jeans. Alex glanced over at me and I wondered what did he see. What did he think when he looked at me.

"I have to find a bathroom" Alex said leaning over speaking in my ear.

"Me too" I replied, and it was true for the beers had me needing to go.

We stood in line, me behind Alex. I looked at the curvature of his upper body, the broad shoulders and back tapering down to that narrow waist and the small indention along his spine. HIs jeans sat so low I was surprised I could not see the crack of his ass. Eventually we made it inside and when we came out we saw a band setting up neither of us cared about so we walked around the site along the perimeter. We made our way to a dark corner up next to a screen wall. Alex leaned against it, head back and eyes closed and I moved up next to him, our elbows barely touching.

"Why?" Alex asked and I knew what he meant.

"I don't know...it's just...there are things I think...feel and I found myself..." I stammered unsure how to explain it.

"Found yourself no longer like your friends?"

"Yeah...something like that.  Hey, how did you get down here?"

"I took a bus to Mobile and then caught a ride with someone heading this way. Your parents didn't say anything about coming down here alone?"

"Well they encouraged me to get out of the house but they think I came down here with someone.  Where are you staying?"

"The beach....I guess" Alex replied laughing how absurd it sounded.

"I got a room just north of here. I couldn't afford any on the beach.  You want to crash with me?"

There it was, the moment when Alex gave me a knowing look, knew I was floundering around on how to approach him taking whatever option was available to me. He said he knew at that moment he was going to fuck me before the night was over. But what he didn't know was what would happen afterward.

We leaned against that wall barely talking but I felt Alex ease closer to me, our arms eventually pressed together. I didn't back off and suddenly he turned to me, moved right up against me, one leg pressed up between my own making me aware of my aroused state, one that grew with every moment Alex was touching me. His hands moved to my waist as he leaned down and kissed me. Then he slid his hands softly up each side and around my body pulling us together. I pushed back against his leg letting him feel my erection as I ran one hand up his stomach to his chest pushing the tank top upward. I pulled back then leaned to his chest. I kissed it, moved my lips over the slick warm skin till I felt my lips graze an erect nipple. I tongued it, pressed my lips to it and sucked softly then I nipped it with my teeth, just a light bite and Alex moaned as he pushed his chest against me harder.

"Jesus, get a room" a strange voice said in passing, lauging as they said it.

"We have all day tomorrow to hear the bands; you want to come back to my hotel room?" I whispered in Alex's ear as he kissed my neck.

"Yes" came his reply and just as quickly he had my hand leading me out.

On the ride to the hotel Alex sat leaned back against the door, his left leg propped up on the bench seat and I ran my hand up the leg of his jeans along his lower leg feeling the soft hairs with my fingertips. I ran fingers lightly over his skin till he would snigger and squirm around a little.

"That tickles."

He followed me up the stair and down the balcony to Room 215. I went in first and Alex followed me closing the door and locking it. I stood frozen at the foot of the bed afriad to turn around. I was suddenly worried for I had no clue what Alex would expect of me, what I was suppose to do or if I could do it. His arms came around my waist and his chest pressed up against my back.

"Have you done this before?" Alex whispered in my ear.

"No...have you?"

"No."

I remember everything, every detail of that night. Alex running one arm around my neck holding me in place as he kissed it, nibbled my ear and moved along the side of my face. The other hand moved down my chest and it felt hot against my skin. My heart raced as it moved downward. I was breathing hard and his hand moved over my undulating stomach, gently, barely touching my skin then the fingers moved along the top of my jeans. They were damp with sweat and felt tight, confining and those fingers dug beneath the waist band and snaked downward raking over my skin just above my cock. I grew erect, my cock strained against its confinement. I reached back and ran my hands up and down Alex's thighs then moved one hand to his crotch. I felt it, his erection lying sideways and pushing outward. It filled the palm of my hand as I moved along its length.

I felt my jeans loosen around my waist, felt them spread open and knew Alex had them undone. His hand moved over my boxers and the thin fabric did nothing to diminish his touch, the feel of his fingers along my hard shaft then manipulating the head. I pumped my hips back and forth, back against Alex and forward against his hand. He pushed my jeans and boxers down my legs till they puddled around my ankles as I felt his hand take me, stroke me till I ached for release and he stopped.

Alex pulled back and I stood there in a daze. I slowly stepped out of my jeans and kicked them off to one side of the room. My cock stood straight out flexing up and down. I looked in the mirror and saw the light capture the glistening drop that fell from the head and I saw Alex as he stepped out of his jeans, now as naked as I. His body appeared to glow in the dim light and I saw him move toward me once again. His hard cock pressed against me as he moved up close, our bodies in full contact, bare skin against bare skin. I shivered with the heat of this contact. I coudn't stop myself and pumped my hips pressing back against him.

"You want to get on the bed?" Alex whispered in my ear and I moved to it, the one bed in the room, pulling the covers roughly back to the foot. I turned, sat down and reached out for Alex. I pulled him up between my legs and kissed his abdomen just above his cock feeling it press against my neck. I leaned back, took it in hand and brought my lips to the head. I heard him gasp as I moved my lips over the flared head then let them slide over it. I didn't think, only acted, played my part in this drama, letting Alex slide between my lips till I couldn't take any more of him. I held him by the hips and moved on his cock, back and forth, noisily, sloppy in my efforts, but Alex was moaning and soon he pushed me off of his cock.

"Not yet."

He pushed me back and I eased up on the bed and lay on my back. I spread my legs, willing, ready, and watched Alex move between them. He lifted my right leg and kissed the calf, ran his lips up to my ankle then over my foot, every touch electric.

I scooted down toward him closer, raised my knees and reached for his cock, the head wet to the touch and I felt it flex in my hand, the hard shaft thick in my palm.

"Please...Alex...put it in me" I pleaded and he smiled down at me, ran a hand over my stomach and down to my cock stroking it slickly in his hand and I pumped my hips, undulated before him, pleading for him to fuck me. He lifted my legs to his shoulders and moved his long lean body over me folding me in half. I felt the weight of his body press me down and I raised my ass up opening up to him. His cock touched me, pressed against me then slid slickly over my skin. He pressed to my tightness and I felt myself stretch open, felt Alex breach my tightness and push inward. Every inch as it moved inward till his abdomen pressed down on my ass.

"Fuck...Jason...I'm all the way in" Alex whispered and he kissed my neck, moved along my jaw till our lips were pressed together then tongues dueling.

"Fuck me" I uttered my lips grazing Alex's as I spoke.

I felt Alex pull upward then slowly sink back into my depths, inch by inch. I felt him fill me. I felt the way our bodies locked together. My cock was trapped between us and every move by Alex drove me wild with desire.  Alex found his rhythm, hips moving up and down in a steady pace, pushing into me all the way then pulling nearly out. Over and over and over that cock stroked my insides, sank all the way into my depths. I held him in my arms and moved my own ass as best I could, pushing up any degree I could to take more of Alex, open myself to take all of him, every inch. He pressed tightly against me then pulled back faster and faster, his rhythm growing more urgent.

"Fuck...fuck...fuck" Alex was uttering as he drove into me. I could feel the bed rock beneath us then began to squeak slightly in rhythm with Alex, every push downward. His breath was hot to my neck and I ran my hands down his back till I held each ass cheek, felt the flex with his fuck, their movement, natural, primitive, urgent, driving harder and harder till he was jabbing into me hard. His breathing grew ragged and I felt his whole body shiver.

"Oh....FUCK" Alex cried out loudly, obscenely, as he released himself in me. He jabbed inward in short rough thrusts ejaculating with every push inward filling me with his load.

He pushed inward all the way and held it there as  he collapsed on top of me. I slipped my legs around his waist and held him, his body hot against my own.

When he finally stirred I felt my own cock pinned between us, still erect, the head moving slickly over my skin as it moved upward and pointed to my chin. Alex moved up over me and rubbed his ass over my cock, back and forth, slowly, pressing down with his weight.

"Stop...stop, you're going to make me cum."

Alex smiled mischievously as he reached behind his body and took me in hand and held me up. I watched as he lowered his ass to my cock, felt the pressure of him lowering down on it, felt him open to me, his tight opening milking my cock as it slide downward. I held still, afraid to move, as Alex took me, inch by inch disappearing up into his body. I lay there, submissive even as Alex took me inside his body, as he began to move up and down, slowly at first. I felt every inch squeeze in and out of his tight opening. He moved steadily up and down, his pace finally increasing after a long time. Faster and faster he moved, his stomach undulating with every breath as his skin began to glisten wetly. I put my hands on his thighs and felt the flex of muscle, the way they tightened up with each move.

How long Alex had been on top of me I didn't know but he tired, his pace slowed and I knew it was time for me to stop being submissive, to stop just lying there making him do all the work to give us pleasure. I sat up, hugged his sweaty body to my own and rolled us over. I put him on his back and moved over him. I felt his legs wrap around my waist as I pushed inward all the way.

"Fuck...Jason...fuck me" Alex whispered as I rose up over him and began to fuck, to work my hips driving my cock into him all the way. My pace quickened, my body tightened with its exertion as I piston cock inside of him. I leaned down and kissed him as I kept up my pace. Our tongues dueled as his tight opening milked my cock with every thrust. Over and over and over I pumped into him, harder, faster, the bed squeaking beneath us.

"Shit...I'm gonna..." I stammered before thrusting deep into him and released myself. Every jab of cock inward I ejaculated till I was thrusting my cock through the slick remains of my load. I was spent and kept thrusting till my cock grew so sensitive I couldn't stroke another stroke.

***

"So you guys met way down on the beach that first time?" Billy asked and Alex and I nodded.

"Our first time together" I added telling Billy and Tyler of us meeting at that music festival, although I left out the intimate details from that night in the hotel. Looking at the two of them across from us at the dining table and I knew that was something neither of them really needed to hear. I was sure they had their own intimacies.

It has been six years since that night and Alex and I live together in our own place. I work with dad on the farm and Alex has his art work. In the last year he has finally gotten some gallery space in New Orleans and Atlanta and starting to sell a few pieces for real money. I looked at Billy and Tyler thinking how different it was for them even in this rural place. They have been dating for most of their senior year, openly which still has moments when things can go bad. Tyler was sporting a black eye now from getting in a fight with a bully at school, but evidently Billy seemed to step in and gain the upper hand. The scenario seems so alien to us when we consider what it was like a few short years ago.

"Anyone want desert?" Alex asked as he got up from the table. I watched him move into the kitchen, the way he moved, so graceful despite his height. I was still intrigued by him. He still took my breath away. I watched him pull ice cream from the freezer for the pie and smiled at the domestic nature of it. When I looked back at Billy and Tyler they were smiling, almost to the point of laughing.

"What?"

"You guys are like my parents" Tyler responded.