Jared Wheeler and I had been friends since our sophomore year in college. We met at an end-of-freshman-year party for gays and lesbians, thrown by the Psychology Club on campus. A guy named Steve, whom I’d met online, invited me. Steve and I both hoped we’d hit it off and have a bit of sex before summer vacation. That didn’t happen. Instead, I was introduced to Jared because he was looking for a roommate for the fall. I was desperately looking for a different roommate.
The one I’d spent my freshman year avoiding was an asshole who believed all gay men were women trapped in men’s bodies. He said he was shocked to find out I was gay, and according to him, my problems would be eliminated if I just cut off my testicles and had my penis inverted. When I asked him how that would solve my problems of wanting to fuck men, he told me the desire would stop when my balls were removed. He said it wouldn’t take long for me to just want to be fucked by men.
I decided my best course of action was to avoid any discussions with him, and whenever possible, avoid him as well. I’d done a good job of it, but I wanted a roommate I could tolerate, so I didn’t want to be randomly assigned a new one.
After a brief conversation, I felt pretty comfortable with Jared, and we both requested to be roommates. Steve ended up with a physics major whom he told me made him really happy. I spent the summer wondering whether Jared would make me happy. The two of us got along great, as friends. Being friends with benefits was not in the cards for us. The closest we ever got to that was one night after midterms when we drank too much whisky and Coke and attempted to make out. We broke into laughter so often that I went over to my bed and promptly fell asleep.
The next morning, we each tried to apologize to the other, but each attempt was met with more laughter. We gave one another a huge hug and promised to be lifetime friends. In fact, I think we were like brothers, because even when he would do something to make me upset or anger me, I was able to forgive him and get past it rather easily.
Once we had both graduated, we found jobs in the city in different departments at the same employer and considered sharing an apartment. Jared’s older brother suggested we live on our own for a year to experience more independence, and while I think we bravely said that was a good idea, we were both nervous about having no one immediately at home on whom we could rely. Jared’s brother was right, though, and we were able to enjoy our friendship, seeing one another every week or two. I gained a few new friends apart from the friends Jared and I shared, but I was still searching for the man who would be my boyfriend and possibly more.
Jared became more sociable, dating a few times every week, but rarely dating someone more than a few times. He was on PrEP and convinced me to be on it just in case. Jared was a planner, so the day he came by my small, uncluttered office and invited me to a gathering that night, I was surprised. I was usually notified of his events at least two weeks out. Lunch was almost over, and I had decided to get back to work a little early and leave about four.
“So, what’s up with this last-minute Friday night party?” I asked him.
“It’s for my cousin. You’ve heard he’s getting out, right? I told you, remember?” Jared sat in the only other chair in my small room. I could tell he was authentically excited. He and his cousin Jake had been close friends as children until Jake’s family moved across the state. He’d told me many times about the adventures they had as children on their grandparents’ farm.
“You told me that he might. Something about good behavior.” I nodded to let him know I was listening even as I moved some papers to the place in front of me.
“Yeah, on his part anyway. I hear he had it rough in there. He’s always said the drugs weren’t his, but he was using; I know he was, and he’s never denied that part. Plus, he was hanging around with people who were selling. I want to believe him, and maybe I do. Anyway, I’m leaving early to pick him up, and we’re all going to meet at Andy’s Bar and Grill to celebrate. He’s been in for two years. I know he’ll want to have a drink and enjoy himself.”
“Party with some sex fiends rather than druggies?” I couldn’t imagine that someone who’d been in prison would want to be around a lot of people he’d never met on his first day out. He’d want to acclimate. I wanted to be supportive, but I wasn’t sure I should go. Jared must have sensed my hesitation. “They’re not all sex fiends,” he retorted.
“I’ve met most of your friends; most of them have tried to finger my ass before they’ve even been told my name.”
“Well, some of them are a little hypersexed, I guess.”
I scoffed.
“Anyway, I’ve invited someone for you. Somebody you’ve wanted to meet. Guess who.”
I could hear the smile on his face. “I thought the party was for Jake,” I said. My curiosity had been piqued, but I didn’t want to sound desperate.
“It is for Jake, but it seemed like a perfect time to make you happy as well.”
“Who?” I asked.
“Oh, just a ginger I know.”
I hated it when he called anyone a ginger, but I knew immediately to whom he was referring, Joshua Campbell. “I don’t believe you. You said he was coming to your last little party, and guess who didn’t show.”
“He’ll be there. I told him how much you wanted to blow him.” Jared made a gesture with his hand and pushed against his cheek with his tongue.
“You’re an asshole,” I said.
“Sometimes,” he agreed. He paused for a few seconds and sat at the edge of my desk. “Well, I didn’t exactly say that. I did tell him that you wanted to get to know him better. He barely remembers you because you’re too nice. I showed him a pic, and he remembered you right away. He said you’re hot, and he’d be there.”
“Whose picture did you really show him?”
“Yours, of course. That one from last summer when we got you to wear the bikini that makes your butt look really big. And, I might have implied that if the two of you hit it off, he’d get lucky.”
“Double asshole,” I replied, but if there was any chance I’d get to talk to him, I had to take it. “I’ll be there,” I said, although I still wasn’t sure that I should.
“I knew you’d say yes. I’m off to pick up Jake,” said Jared. “See you later.”
While I didn’t expect to have company after the party, I did a quick organization of my practically spotless apartment. Who knew what Josh would want to do, and I wanted to be ready for anything. I assumed that if we really hit it off, we’d end up at his place to make out. I was definitely not going to have sex with him on the first date. That’s what he was probably used to, and I wanted to set myself apart from Jared’s other friends who would drop their pants and spread their cheeks anytime someone with a dick walked into a room.
I wondered what to wear. Something to impress him, but not so much that I appeared to think myself better than everyone else. And not something slutty; I didn’t want to look desperate. Then I realized it was country night at Andy’s. Jeans, boots, and a plaid shirt would do the trick. I pressed the shirt and got dressed. I pulled down the box with my cowboy hat. I tried it on and took it right back off. I started to put it back in the box and then I put it on again.
Ambivalence ruled, and I left the hat on my head. I could always toss it in the back seat before I went in. With it, I looked like a city slicker trying to emulate a cowboy. I took another look at myself. The hat did complete the outfit, but then, so would a horse. I checked the time. I was right on schedule. If I left now, I’d be there about ten minutes late, completely fashionable. As I got in the car, I noticed that my heart was beating a little bit faster.
The drive was uneventful, and when I arrived at Andy’s, I was super nervous. Was it because I would get to talk to Josh or was it meeting a felon for the first time? I’d met Josh two weeks before at the company picnic, and he was really easy to talk to, and he seemed interested in talking with me.
I’d never met Jake; although, I’d seen pictures of him when Jared and he were about thirteen. They both seemed like normal, geeky teenagers. I put my head down on the top of the steering wheel and held back a scream. I wanted to drive back home, and I wanted to meet Josh. I pulled an image of him into my mind. A little taller than I was, he was incredibly good-looking. He had beautiful eyes, and I had to admit that I’d imagined what it would be like to be made love to while looking deep into them. I took a deep breath and relaxed my shoulders. I walked carefully but with purpose to the entrance. Walking in boots was different from my usual tennis shoes, but I made it inside with the usual flair of a city boy in cowboy boots. The dimly lit place was still relatively uncrowded, and I quickly spotted Josh talking to Jared and a few of the other guys. I recognized Erik and Mike and another man I didn't know. I realized I was still wearing the hat as I walked up and waited for Josh to conclude the story he was telling. I assumed it was a good one as everyone seemed entranced.
“So, they were brother and sister, twins, and all three of us were dancing together. I told them that I couldn’t decide which of them was hotter, and the girl asked, “Why decide?” I went back to their place, and I took turns doing them both. Fuck, it was hot. I dumped a load in her while she was sucking him. Then I proceeded to rim his ass. She kept blowing him; her spit was making his hole even wetter. I shoved my cock in his tight ass. She crawled on top and started to ride him. So I ended up dumping a load in him while he was fucking her.” Josh took a big gulp of beer. “They’ve invited me over tomorrow for another round.”
Several of the guys were adjusting themselves. Wait, I thought, this is not the same guy. It can’t be. It certainly looked like him, but the guy I talked to at the picnic was sweet and gentle. He had a kindness about him that made me want to know him better. Josh poked Jared in the shoulder with his index finger. “You know, a nice tight ass is fun to fuck, and a dick can give you something to hold on to while you’re pushing hard and deep, but I’ll tell you this, I never got shit on my dick while pumping a hot, wet pussy.”
He turned to me and said, “Hey, do I know you? You look familiar.” He laughed and turned to Jared. “Is this the guy that’s going to blow me in the bathroom?” He chuckled again. Jared’s face went white. I bit my lower lip. The word ‘crass’ formed in my mind. I felt the pain of disappointment slice through my heart.
My sister once told me that all men are pieces of shit. I didn’t want to believe that, but every man I’d been interested in had made me wonder whether she were right.
“Not me,” I said. I looked at Jared; I wanted to knee the bastard and knee Jared, too. “I’m here to support Jake. Where is he?”
Erik pointed to the bar. “He’s the one on the end.” I looked where his finger told me, I turned away from that group to walk over to Jake. I was furious. I stopped and took a breath. Jared had nearly destroyed our friendship on several occasions; I’m not sure exactly what he said to Josh, but I wondered whether I could trust him. The crush I’d had on that handsome man was definitely misplaced. I glanced back. He didn’t seem as handsome now.
I knew deep down that I would forgive Jared. This was no place to vent my anger. Jake didn’t deserve that, and he was the real reason for this get-together even if everyone had abandoned him to listen to the conquests of a slut. Although I didn’t know Jake, he needed people who would help him adjust to his new life and be successful.
I reached into my pocket and pulled out a ten as I walked to the bar. “I’ll have a rum and Coke,” I told the bartender and placed the bill on the counter. I would only allow myself one drink since I was driving, so I would nurse it. I turned and looked at Jake, a man I’d never met. He seemed a little smaller than I expected, probably about five-ten. I guess I thought he’d be taller since his cousin was over six feet. He appeared fit, trim, and sad. He sat by himself. The others who were here to celebrate his release were giggling about stories of incest. I stepped closer to him. “Hi, Jake. I’m Aaron. I know we’ve never met, but I’ve heard a lot of good things about you from Jared.”
He raised his thick, dark eyebrows to expose crystal blue eyes that looked me over. His thin lips opened into a smile, and he pushed his hand out to shake mine. The man, ultra handsome, stood up. At just under six feet, I was only slightly taller than he, but my eyes were locked with his.
“Your change,” said the barkeep.
“You keep it. Thanks,” I replied without turning my head. Jake’s mouth was smiling, but sadness filled his eyes. I wanted to hug him and tell him that things would look up for him, but I knew the future could be rough for him. I sat in the chair next to his and took a sip from my drink. “I’m glad to finally meet you.”
“Yeah?” His tone questioned why as he sat back down.
“From what Jared has told me, you got a rough deal. I wanted to let you know that if there’s anything I can do to help you get…”
He nodded.
“I guess I don’t know what you might need or what to say but now that I’ve met you, I want things to go as easily for you as they can.” I paused for a moment. “I don’t mean to imply…” We locked eyes again. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m rambling. I’m just not sure what to say.”
“It’s OK, Aaron. I appreciate the fact that you’re saying anything. Everyone else is so uncomfortable that, well… I guess I don’t know what to say either.” He smiled slightly and covered my right hand with his left. A tingle shot through me.
Jared walked up to us; Josh was a few feet behind him. “Hey, cuz. We’re going to take the party to my place. Some of the guys want things to get a little more personal and playful. And Josh here has offered to be your personal slave slut.”
“Anything for the troops,” slurred Josh.
“I’m not up for that, Jared,” said Jake.
“Well, I suppose we can go into the bedroom and close the door,” suggested Jared.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. What selfish pigs! “So you’re going to leave Jake in the living room all alone?”
Neither Jared nor Josh said anything. “I’ll be OK,” Jake said, putting his hand on my shoulder.
“No,” I told him as I shook my head. “I’ll tell you what,” I added as I turned to face Jake. “Why don’t I take you out for some food, my treat, and after, well, we can play it by ear. We can go see a movie or something, or if you’d rather watch one without a crowd, we can go to my place and watch a DVD or stream something.”
“I am kind of hungry,” said Jake.
“Settled,” I said before anyone could interrupt. “We’ll just finish our drinks, then head out.” I looked up at Jared; he appeared aggravated.
“OK. See you later, Jake.” He turned and grabbed Josh. “Let’s go.”
With my attention turned back to Jake, I heard him say, “Thanks. I’ve had enough listening to guys fucking in the next room to last a lifetime.”
My heart sank a little with that. Most gay guys are turned on by such sounds; many straight guys are too; they just won’t readily admit it. My hopes that Jake might have received a tingle from touching my hand dissipated.
“I hadn’t thought about that,” I admitted. My curiosity poked me in the ribs, but I quelched it. “And, it’ll be nice for me not to eat alone.”
“You?” he chuckled. “I bet there’s a line of guys waiting to have dinner with you.”
I raised my eyebrows at his comment.
“Not a one; not in a long while. Actually, not ever.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t say things like that.”
“Hey, no worries. Once guys find out that I’m not a jump in the sack on the first date, they don’t even want the first date. I’m waiting for the right one.” I gave the back of his hand a mild pat. “Really, don’t worry about it.”
The dinner was nice, friendly, enjoyable. We went to Texas Road House, and Jake had his first steak dinner in a long while. He spoke of his childhood and the times he and Jared spent together. He began to tell me how he’d begun to feel different from the other guys while in high school and started to hang out with the guys who did drugs. “They made me feel as if I belonged. I realize now that wasn’t true. Shit. I’ve fucked up my life.” He turned to look out the window.
“Not your whole life,” I said. “The fucked up part is over. As long as you don’t fall into that trap again, and I believe it is a trap. Jared told me that you admitted to being addicted, but that you weren’t dealing, even though that's why you went to prison. Guilt by association. It’s probably going to make the next part more difficult, but you survived the worst part.”
“Everyone tells me that I’ve paid my debt and that things are going to look up for me, but I’m worried that it will be just as you said. It’s going to be hard-going.”
“But you can do it. You’ve got at least two people who want to help you out. I’m willing to do what I can, and so is Jared, even if he was a prick tonight, and still is a prick and deserves…” I paused. “I don’t know what he deserves, but I’m pissed at him right now, so my judgement is clouded.”
“Yeah,” smiled Jake. “For someone with such a small dick, he can be an awfully big dick.”
I nodded in agreement. “That’s our Jared.” I took my last bite.
“Aaron, you haven’t asked me whether I was really guilty.”
“I don’t have to. It’s strange, but I know you, and I’ve known you. We just met, but I’ve known you for years.” I looked directly at him, and I knew that I could trust him completely. “Room for dessert?”
“No. I need this to settle.” He slapped his belly. I heard the sound of a firm abdomen under his shirt and felt a twinge in my groin. As we walked out to the car, I asked, “Theater or private showing?” “
“You want to show me your privates?” He laughed.
“There’s a fee involved with that, and it’s a steep one,” I replied.
He gave me a side hug. “Thanks for this. I really needed a good meal and some quiet time with good conversation. Let’s go to your place and watch something in your collection.”
“Sounds good to me. I prefer movies I can pause when I need to… um.”
“Piss or take a shit?” He laughed again. “Sorry, I’ve been around a lot of crude people for the past few years. I meant to say, ‘powder your nose.’”
“Just so you know, I’ve never powdered my nose. I’ve emptied my bladder; I’ve urinated; I’ve even gone to the bathroom.”
“Oh, oh. Too much information,” he laughed again. “Some people just share too much.”
“Wait until I tell you my cure for post anal sex constipation.”
Jake grabbed me by the arms and pushed me against my car. “You’re a liar,” he said. “There’s no such thing as post anal sex constipation, and you’re a hypocrite. You act like such a nice boy, but you’re really naughty on the inside.” His lips formed a smirk.
I wanted to kiss him.
“But, in my humble opinion,” he continued as he released his grip, “you’re a normal dude, and I’m just giving you a hard time.” He stood in front of me without saying more.
“So,” I finally said, “what movie did you want to watch?”
I saw a grin form on his face. “Jaws.” He turned and leaned against the car right next to me. “Or Raiders of the Lost Ark.”
“Lucky you. I have both.”
“I knew you would. I just knew it,” said Jake.
“So you can add the word predictable to the growing list of descriptors that you have for me.”
“I don’t think I will. I’m not sure that you are predictable; I think that I’m just getting to know you better. For instance, when I ask you whether I can take a quick shower before we watch the movie, I already know the answer.”
“Well, if you already know that I’ll say no, why ask?” I crossed over him and opened my door.
“Because you wouldn’t say no; you couldn’t say no; it’s not in your nature.”
“Really? You don’t think I could say no?” I asked.
“Nope. Not even if your bathroom were a mess. You would say yes and then scrub it as soon as we got to your place.”
“That’s what anyone would do,” I retorted. “Now, get in.”
He went to the other side of the car and got into the passenger seat. “No, Aaron, not anyone. But you would. Because you’re kind and thoughtful.” He turned and looked directly at me. “Oh, shit,” he exclaimed. “My clothes. They’re in Jared’s car.” He grabbed the buckle to the seat belt and snapped it into the receptacle.
I did not relish the idea of dropping in on Jared’s orgy, so I suggested we stop at Target or Walmart and get him something comfortable. He seemed a little uncomfortable with the idea. “What’s wrong?” I asked. He looked down at his hands. “I don’t have the cash for that, and I don’t want you to buy me any clothes.”
I didn’t reply; I just started the car.
“But you’re going to anyway, right?”
“This evening is my treat to help you get off on the right foot. Getting you some underwear and a t-shirt will make me feel good. I can feel that I’m making a slight difference.”
“It’s more than a slight difference. I appreciate it, but I’m not sure I can ask you to do that.”
“You didn’t ask. I offered. And the alternative is to watch the movie with a towel around your waist while we wait for your clothes to finish washing and drying.” I saw a smile creep across his face. “And, I’ve got a leather sofa. Those things are cold when you sit on them naked.”
“OK. You win.” He broke out into a true smile. “So, how do you know how cold it is to sit on your couch with no clothes on?”
I chuckled at that, but I wondered whether I had really won. A towel would be so easy to slip my hand under. He was definitely a handsome guy, and if he had tried to pick me up, I’m sure I would have let him. But he was just having fun with his first freedom in quite a while. I took a deep breath and told myself to let the evening play out.
Shopping in Walmart with Jake took no time at all. He chose the most inexpensive underwear and would have picked the cheapest t-shirt available, but I convinced him to let me pick his shirt from those with slogans on the front. As I tried to decide between a brown shirt with Smokey Bear and one with a NASA emblem, he pulled one with a Monopoly card on it that read ‘get out of jail free.’ He laughed at my shocked look, and he protested when I put all three shirts in the cart. Actually, I put four shirts in the cart, as I had pulled two Smokey Bear shirts from the shelf. With a new sense of boldness, I wheeled the cart toward the short pants, and after asking his waist size, I put two identical cargo shorts into the cart.
“I have other clothes; they’re just in Jared’s car. I told you that,” his tone let me know that he was frustrated.
“You need something for tomorrow; it’s going to be warm. And I like the look of these, so I’m getting one for me. We just happen to be the same size.”
Then I could wear one of yours and give it back once I get mine,” he insisted.
“But I only have one pair of shorts at home, and they’re dark green. We can’t both wear them at the same time.”
He shook his head. “You win.”
“We’re both going to win.” I smiled. “And, now that I think about it, you deserve more comfortable underwear.”
“The ones I picked will be just fine.”
I smiled at him. His obstinance, his defiance was quite attractive. “OK. I’m going to buy a package of my favorite, and if you change your mind, I’ll let you wear one of mine. I’ll even give you one.”
“I’ll put these back, then,” he said. He said nothing more as we checked out, but he did keep smiling and shaking his head.
“I did like the Smokey Bear shirt you picked out,” Jake said, breaking the silence of the drive to my apartment. “Well, tomorrow, we can both wear one when we meet up with Jared,” I told him.
“Matching shirts?”
“And matching cargo shorts,” I added.
“Shirt buddies?” He laughed as I pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex. “Don’t forget about our matching underwear,” I said.
“I’m not telling Jared about those.” I parked the car and led Jake to my apartment. Once inside, I directed him to the bathroom.
“Spotless,” he said. “I knew it.”
“Hurry up,” I replied. “I’ll run these through the dryer with a fabric softener sheet and a wet washcloth. I’ll put them on the bed when I’ve finished.” While Jake showered, I took care of the clothes and made some iced tea. I also popped some corn for a bit of a movie-watching snack.
When Jake came into the living room, he was wearing the NASA t-shirt and a pair of bamboo fabric underwear. “Fucking A, Dude,” he exclaimed. “These are awesome.”
“Told you. Just so you know, I’ve never lied to you, and I certainly wouldn’t lie to you about underwear. Everything is set up for an evening of shark-flavored entertainment.”
“Thanks, Aaron. You’re the best.”
I felt a pang in my chest. I was concerned that I was attracted to, and maybe even falling for a straight man. He had said nothing, absolutely nothing, to indicate that he could be gay. Jared had said nothing to make me believe that he might be gay. Yet I was allowing his charm and smile to draw me to him. I needed to stop before I got hurt.
“Let’s start the movie,” I said, and I moved to the couch and took a place about one-third away from one end. I picked up the remote and pressed play. I had paused the movie at the very start so it would begin without all the extra trailers.
Jake sat about a third of the way from the other end. He took a sip of his tea and proclaimed, “This is good. It’s one of the things you miss when..” He stopped and said nothing more until Ben Gardner’s head is shown through the hole in his boat. He shuddered significantly and exclaimed, “Fuck.”
I looked over at him and smiled. I could tell that his face had reddened slightly. “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen this. I forgot about this part.”
I leaned over and put my arm around his shoulders. “It gets scarier. Maybe you should sit closer to me.” I was surprised that he slid a little closer to me.
“You’ll keep me safe?” he asked.
I put my hand on the side of his head and kissed his temple. “Of course. I won’t let that bad shark get you.” He smiled, and we went back to watching the movie. I could feel him tense up from time to time, but he did not shout out any expletives. My hand had fallen to rest next to him but on the couch. We stayed like that until the credits began to roll. Jake leaned forward and used the remote to turn off the TV. He straightened his back and pressed my arm into the cushions behind. He turned his head to face me. I felt his eyes stare into mine before they scanned down to my lips and back into my eyes. My heart was racing. “I need to confess something,” said Jake.
No, I thought. You were innocent. I feel it. “You said something that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about.” Jake moved closer. He continued to look into my eyes, but he became silent. I wanted to kiss him, but I was afraid there would be a punchline to the joke he was playing on me.
“Talk to me, Jake.”
“You said you were waiting for the right one. Could I be the right one?” I saw a trace of fear cross his face.
“I hope you are,” I whispered to him. “I want you to be.”
Jake moved closer; his lips spread apart. I kissed his lower lip, then his upper lip. Almost simultaneously, we thrust our tongues forward and pressed them together. We kissed. I licked his chin. He licked my jaw. He nibbled on my ear. I pushed my tongue into his mouth. We kissed again. Our hands were everywhere. I’m sure I touched every part of his body, and at some point, I was on my back with his body between my legs. He had pushed my shirt up and was nibbling on my nipple, then on my ear lobe, followed by my chin, and then back to my nipple. Jake rolled slightly onto his side and rubbed the palm of his hand across my crotch. My penis swelled more in response; it was struggling to be free of my underwear.
“You’re as excited as I am,” he said. “I’m afraid to stop and think about it because I can’t believe that it could be true.”
“You can’t believe that I would be attracted to an intelligent, physically fit perfect specimen of a man?” I kissed the top of his head. “I think we need to move to the bedroom where there’s a little more room for discovery.”
He stood up and held his hand out to me. I took it and let him pull me to my feet. He didn’t let go of my hand as he led me down the short hall to my bedroom. The room was neat, the bed was made, and the lamp on the nightstand cast a soft, warm light. He stopped at the edge of the bed and turned to face me. He let go of my hand and used both of his to lift my shirt over my head. He tossed it onto a chair. His eyes moved over my chest and stomach. He ran his fingers lightly through the hair there. “You’re beautiful, Aaron.” He leaned in and kissed me, a slow, deep kiss that tasted of tea and a new beginning.
My hands went to the hem of his NASA shirt. I broke the kiss just long enough to pull it over his head. His chest was smooth, his muscles defined from years of work and confinement. I ran my thumb over one of his nipples, and he drew in a sharp breath. I did it again, and then I leaned down and took it into my mouth, flicking it with my tongue the way he had done to me.
“Aaron,” he breathed. His hands were on my back, pulling me closer. I could feel the hard length of him through the thin fabric of our underwear. I reached down and hooked my fingers into the waistband of his bamboo underwear. I looked up at him, asking for permission. He just nodded. I slowly pulled them down, freeing his cock. It was perfect, standing erect from a nest of dark curls. I wrapped my hand around it, feeling its warmth and weight. He let out a low groan and pushed his hips forward slightly. I knelt in front of him. I looked up at his face, his eyes closed, his lips parted. I leaned forward and took the head of his cock into my mouth. It was smooth and hot. I swirled my tongue around it, tasting the salty drop of pre-come that had beaded at the tip. I took him deeper, moving my hand in time with my mouth. His hands tangled in my hair, not pushing, just holding on.
“Stop,” he said, his voice tight. “I don’t want to finish like this. Not yet.” I stood up. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband of my underwear and slid them down my legs. My own cock sprang free, hard and aching. He took it in his hand, stroking it slowly, his gaze locked on mine. He guided me back onto the bed, and I lay down. He stretched out beside me, propped on an elbow. He ran his free hand over my body, from my chest down to my thigh, learning me.
“I’ve thought about this,” he said, his voice a low murmur. “In there. You don’t have much privacy, but you have your thoughts. I thought about what it would be like to be with a man who actually gave a shit about me.”
“I give a shit, Jake.” I reached up and traced the line of his jaw. “I really do.”
He leaned down and kissed me again, a desperate, hungry kiss that stole my breath. He moved over me, settling between my legs. The weight of him felt right. He rocked his hips, our cocks sliding against each other, a friction that was almost too much to bear.
I reached over to the nightstand and fumbled in the drawer for the bottle of lube and a condom. I handed them to him. He took them and sat back on his heels. He opened the condom and rolled it down his length with a practiced hand. Then he squeezed some lube onto his fingers. He looked at me, a question in his eyes. “Yes,” I said. “Please, Jake.” He coated his cock with the lube and then lifted my legs, placing them over his shoulders. He positioned himself at my entrance and pushed forward slowly. I gasped as he entered me, a sharp, sweet stretch that burned in the best way. He paused, letting me adjust, his eyes watching my face. “OK?” he asked.
“OK,” I breathed. He began to move, slowly at first, then faster, deeper. With each thrust, he hit a place inside me that sent jolts of pleasure through my entire body. I reached down and took my own cock in my hand, stroking it in time with his movements. The room was filled with the sounds of our breathing, the slap of skin against skin, and the soft creak of the bed.
“Look at me,” he said, his voice rough. I opened my eyes. His face was flushed, his eyes dark with desire. He was watching me, watching us. It was the most intimate thing I had ever experienced. “Aaron,” he groaned. “I’m close.”
“Me too,” I managed to say. He thrust into me one last time, hard and deep, and cried out my name as he came. The feeling of him pulsing inside me was enough to push me over the edge. I came, spurting over my own hand and stomach, a wave of pleasure so intense it left me shaking. He collapsed onto me, his head on my chest, his body slick with sweat. We lay like that for a long time, our hearts pounding together. He shifted his weight and kissed my chest, right over my heart.
“I was wrong before,” he said, his voice muffled against my skin. “You’re not the right one.” My stomach tightened. “You’re the only one.” I wrapped my arms around him, holding him tight. I didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, but I knew that tonight, for the first time in a long time, I was not waiting anymore. I was home.
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