First Crush

Taken from my eDiary cum personal blog @ https://desimunda.wordpress.com/

(Continued from previous part of story with same Title)

“Okay ! Tell me now…  How old were you when you had your first sex?“, He interrogated. He opted for a direct question-answer approach when he noticed that his old style did not work.

“I had never done sex yet.. I mean… before meeting you.“, I explained.

He giggled and said, “Bull Shit! Even we did not have sex yet. Don’t name this smooching and hugging as sex. You haven’t touched my dick yet and I have not even seen yours.“

“Then, I never had sex.“, I replied with a smile.

“What the fuck! I don’t believe you.“, He said in a surprising tone.

“Why?“, I asked. Now even I was surprised on his comment. “You believe it or not, but that’s true. BTW… why can’t I live without having sex? Why are you so surprized?“, I cross questioned him.

“All your actions, ….. your style are so full of seduction. The way you look, your cute smile, your touch, the way you talk, all are part of killer packs you have. Look at your round butts, perfectly shaped round thighs… And what about the way you touch me in the bed, ….kiss me, … it is so full of passion and perfect…. first timer cannot do it like that.“, he added.

His disbelief made me feel like a play boy. or more appropriately, like a criminal, a prostitute. His accusations had hurt me more than his not believing me. He made me feel like a shit. This disappointment lead to instantly fade away all my self-respect and confidence, which reflected appropriately on my face immediately.

He got alert after seeing natural response to his accusations on my face. To control the damages, he came on back-foot, and said, “I didn’t mean it that way. Sorry if I happen to hurt your feelings though I did not intend to.”, and then kissed me  to make up for the loss.

Then he continued, “I mean to say, you are no less than a Greek God. Look at yourself baby, your sponges pink palms, your deep navel, your pink nipples, your broad chest, juicy pink lips, killer smile, beautiful shiny eyes, shiny black silky hair…. I mean.. every single part of your body is enough in itself to make anyone beg you for your love.“

He paused momentarily and then started again praising me more enthusiastically, “Even if you forget about the physical beauty, you are more beautiful from inside. Even if I would have been blind, your soft-and sweet voice, with so caring and loving touch was enough for me to fall in love with you. You always tend to take care of people around you. It gives an assurance that you are there for us. How can it be possible that you did not have anyone close to you earlier?“

The power of “Words“. I was amazed to realize it once again. He said almost the same thing but now put in different words. Former was so destructive and humiliating where as later had a healing touch. Sometimes, we happen to do things that we don’t intend to do. But the good thing to remember is that it is never too late for an honest apology.

A little bit of silence gave us time for quick recovery. I diverted my attention to my school days as it was not going to help getting stuck in loop of negative thoughts. I thought for a moment about my school days, and it reminded me of the golden school days, and my lovely friends. Yes, I have always been passionate about my friends, and it is also true that I feel emotionally attached to each and every one of them. They are not just friends for me, they become part of my family. This is also true that I have been really lucky to get the same level of affection in return.

This is also true that I always received due respect and importance in my groups, whether being in a group of friends, among my colleagues or among the group of classmates. I never faced difficulty in making people agree to my terms or my suggestions. People around me were so kind that they readily accepted my suggestions and offers. There was minimal resistance or no resistance at all, most of the times. Does it really have anything to do with my looks?  Does looks and appearance play such a powerful role in our life?

It is also true that I never had a very large friend-circle.  Belonging to a small city, I had been confined to a small group of friends and colleagues. So my exposure was also restricted to a very limited number of people around me before moving to this Metropolitan area. So none of his observations could be generalized on mass scale.

As far as his point about my attractive looks is concerned, I know that I am a little better than average looking guy of my age, and it may also be true that I might have been blessed with sharp and probably attractive physical features (well.. to my opinion it depends a lot on the viewer) but it is also true that no one had ever seen my body earlier (except my parents during my first few years of early childhood and now my roomie after I moved here). People do not have X-Ray eyes to scan my body covered inside clothes. No one ever made me realize earlier that I look so good or attractive or look like a “Greek God”. I never got such compliments. Calling the friends with nick names like “Sexy”, “hotty”, “Cutie-pie”, “my chocolate pie”, “Champ”, “Hero”, etc. was a common thing among friends (my Mom calls me “ape” sometimes), but it does not mean that one is really a Champ or (“ape”) or that one looks sexy, or like a chocolate pie.  So, his point of navel, chest, etc. are out of consideration.  It could not be a reason (I guess !) for me getting the priority and preference over others, if it really ever happened.

“What happened? Where are you lost now? Okay.. stop putting so much load on your tiny mind. Just be with me here now and answer my questions.“, he once again interrupted my long and deep thought process. He pulled me up in his arms, and started playing with my hair.

I looked at his face, expecting him to ask the questions. He started with, “Do you remember any girl or boy who was too close to you, on emotional or physical level?“

It made me recall one incident from my school days and brought smile on my lips. First intimate experiences are really hard to forget.

“Wow ! you are blushing!“, he exclaimed. “That means there was someone. Who was she?“

“She was my classmate when I was in 12th standard.“, I replied. I was even surprized why he named only “She” and not “he” in his last question.

“Tell me the incident in detail… from very beginning.“, he said while continuing to play with my hair. I started narrating the story…

The Story begins… : A Little About Her

She was my classmate and belonged to an elite and reputed industrialist family. I had been very shy, especially when it comes to deal with the girls. I had my schooling up to 10th standard from all-boys school. When I moved to this new school, she also joined it the same year. I was popular among guys, but did not have that open interactions with girls.

Unlike most of other girls in my class, she was bold, frank but reserved, and definitely beautiful. Having a modern outfit, bold makeup, good dressing sense and her style made it evident that she is not like most of “us”. It was a common point of discussion among peers what she was doing in that school as most of us thought that she clearly was not a fit for that gentry, and must go to more royal and costly upper-high class institutes. Most of the girls-gangs were jealous of that “bitch”, because they knew they were unable to compete with her at any front – intellectual, financial or her personality.

Obviously it was hard for her to adjust to new place with such an “attitude”. She could hardly include just a few girls in her friends circle. She was not left with many options by the competing girls-gangs. Boys were  extra-ordinarily supportive and inclined to help the “poor” girl. Such incidents opened the “eyes” of boys to see the “truth” behind dirty politics of the girls-gang. As a result, she had more boy (-friends) than girls in her circle. She anyways, did not mind having a lots of boys in her friends circle. After all she was a “bitch” as identified by the Girls’-Gang.

Even though she was ridiculous and not worth a decent, loyal friendship for anyone, as described by Girls, but she ignited the fire in the campus. All the girls wanted to grab more attention of boys and started competing with her. It improved the life and status of boys in campus as the latest fashion trends and bold dresses were slowly becoming a norm now. Except a few very beautiful, who always had been very selective, most of the other girls were now more open to have boy friends, perhaps just to have a status symbol and show off.