"Let no one mistake us for the fruit of violence - but that violence, having passed through the fruit, failed to spoil it.”
― Ocean Vuong, On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous
“There are worse things in the world than a boy who likes to kiss other boys.”
― Benjamin Alire Sáenz, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe
William C Holman Correctional Facility
North of Atmore, Alabama
Robert Earl McCullough walked out Holman a free man due to some fuck up in the investigation or with the way the prosecutor handled the case, or some other reason that he didn’t care about. All he cared about was being turned loose, now a free man. He walked out to Ross Road, the narrow asphalt road that passed by the facility tucked into the woods, as he wondered how he would get back to Oakboro. He considered what was back there. His lease to the mobile home was canceled when he got arrested and his ungrateful faggot of a son was nowhere to be found. His state provided defense attorney claimed he looked, saying Bobby McCullough was nowhere to be found. He had climbed into that old Caprice with that Stevens boy and drove off. In other words, there was nothing waiting for him in Oakboro.
Atmore was just to his south, how far he wasn’t sure, but some of the inmates said drugs could be sold there as well as anywhere. Some of the shit was brought up on one of the rivers to somewhere north of Pensacola or Mobile and distributed from there. It was a lucrative business, if only he could stop using. The last few months had been hell, sweating it out night after night, but after nearly two years, he was clean. Could he stay that way, he was confident he could do it, but then he had been confident the last time too. It didn’t do a man to dwell on it.
Robert walked westward on Ross Road heading to Highway 21, the main highway that ran north to south. It was south he wanted to go, so he walked toward the road. A short distance the road was running through woods, trees that grew right up to the edge of it as if to conceal it. But after a few hundred feet, the woods ended, and fields were on both sides of the road that angled northwest for no apparent reason. Robert knew the fields were tended by inmates. The rehabilitation part of their incarceration. At the main highway, he passed the guard shack that was empty and moved out to the edge of the it. A pulpwood truck lumbered by, struggling with its load. Looking north, the road was empty, and looking back to the south, a white vehicle was approaching. As it drew near, it became apparent it was a van.
He was going to wait for it to pass, then head toward Atmore. As it drew near, he saw it was a Chevy van, like so many contractors used. Instead of rushing past him, it slowed until it came to stop by him. The rear door slid open, and he saw a large man sitting in back.
“Robert McCullough, get in.”
Robert frowned, then climbed into the van. The door slid closed, and the van turned around and headed south.
Oakboro, Alabama
Sam finished reading the letter from John Henry, folded back up, and put it in the envelope. Ever since John Henry had written to him a few months ago, they had corresponded. About once a month a letter arrived, each one longer than the last. He could sense how John Henry was unwinding, no longer tense like some wild animal. The letters reflected someone settling into what seemed a comfortable life. John Henry had Bobby, in ways that had been a surprise, not just a friend, but a boyfriend as John Henry first described it. Of late, the phrase became partner, something that seemed more permanent. Looking back, so much suddenly made sense. He knew the gossip about Bobby and rethinking how John Henry had been, so isolated from most others, it should have been obvious. But he was just an old man living in a small town, so what did he know of it. As with the past letters, he would compose a reply, tell John Henry the latest gossip of Oakboro and how he seriously considering selling the store and take up fishing or just sitting on his ass and reading detective novels.
He slipped the letter under the cash drawer, not wanting anyone to see it. It was just for him and no one else. He promised John Henry, he would tell no one of their communication, of where John Henry and Bobby were living, or the arrangement that had seemed so crazy at first, until John Henry referred to it as his family.
Sam Worthington was seventy-two years old. A man who lived all his life in Oakboro, Alabama and he didn’t know much, but he knew family was important, no matter what arrangement it took.
The door swung open, ringing the bell, and Sam looked up to see James Stevens, John Henry’s father, walk in. He looked sober, hair neatly trimmed and neatly dressed. And he looked nervous, fidgeting and looking all around.
“James, can I help you find something?” said Sam.
“Hey Sam, I was wondering if you knew anything about John Henry. I’ve not heard anything since he left.”
“Not since you beat him up and he took off tired of your abuse,” said Sam, knowing the way James was acting what he said cut to the quick.
“I know I shouldn’t have done it. But I was struggling. You know, everyone knows what it was like. I just got to where the drinking let me forget.”
“And you abused John Henry.”
“Yes…I admit it.”
“And now you want to find him after nearly two years?”
“I’ve been looking for him ever since I got sober and I can’t find him. Do you know? Do you know where he went? He liked you. Trusted you. He would have told you, right?”
“James, I don’t know where John Henry went.”
“He didn’t tell you anything when he left. I know he came here before leaving. Dan Graham mentioned it one time.”
“Teresa’s father?”
“Yes.”
“James, I don’t know what to tell you. But on the day John Henry came by here and got the money I had held for him,” said Sam, seeing the surprised look telling him James had no idea about the money, “I told him to leave this place and not to come back. So, I don’t expect him to return.”
“You told him not to…” James’ voice trailed off until he was standing silent looking at the floor. “I just want to tell him I’m sorry. I don’t expect him to forgive me, but…” James looked up visibly shaken. “If you hear from him, will you tell him what I said.”
“Yes, James, if I hear from John Henry, I’ll be sure to tell him.”
“Thanks Sam. You were there for him when he needed it, and I’m grateful.” James turned and walked out of the door.
“Damn,” whispered Sam and he wondered how he would tell John Henry in his letter back to him.
Teresa came around from the side of the store and entered as James Stevens pulled out of the parking lot.
“Was that John Henry’s dad?”
“Yes.”
“What did he want?”
“If I knew where John Henry was currently living.”
Teresa looked out watching the old car drive away, then she looked back at Sam. “Mr. Worthington, do you know? Have you heard from John Henry?”
“No, Teresa, I’ve not heard from him. Now if you don’t mind, I’m going home,” said Sam, slipping the letter from under the cash drawer and into his pocket. He came around the counter, facing Teresa. “Call me if there is a problem.”
“I will.”
Lemon Grove
John Henry stepped off the bus and headed back along Broadway to the intersection to turn left on Massachusetts Avenue. He strolled down the sidewalk until at the intersection with Central Avenue, turning right. He wondered how Bobby was doing at the restaurant where he was waiting tables, a place that gave him better tips than the restaurant back in El Cajon. He now worked at a powder coating company not far away, close enough he could have walked home, but the bus let him sit for a few minutes after being on his feet most of the day.
He went through the gate next to the drive and walked down to the third building on the right where they now lived, a two-bedroom apartment that was nicer, with a bathroom for each bedroom and a balcony off the living area. On the way, he stopped at the mailbox getting their mail, then crossed the parking lot to their building, going up the stairs to the second floor to the door on the left. He went to the dining table and sorted the mail. An insurance bill for him, a credit card bill for Eli, a couple of pieces of junk mail for Dallas, and a letter for Eli. He knew Eli had written to an old friend back in Kansas, because he was curious about his family. John Henry looked at the name with the return address, one he had heard Eli mention, knowing it was the friend he had written to.
In the bedroom he shared with Bobby, he went to the dresser and picked up the novel he had been reading. It was one of Bobby’s and since they got new jobs at different businesses and hours, he found himself reading for pleasure for the first time in a very long time. He flipped the book open to the bookmark. He knew there was a movie based on the book, something he hadn’t seen, but he wondered if Hollywood really had made one that stuck to the storyline. He couldn’t imagine it with parts so homoerotic. He wondered what made Anne Rice write such a book.
He looked at the other books set between the books ends, those on the left end the original novels, those he picked up in the yard the day Bobby got thrown out. The books were old, covers worn and frayed, and he wondered how many times each one had been read by Bobby. He could recite their titles from memory: Kafka on The Shore by Haruki Murakami; The Rules of Attraction by Bret Easton Ellis; The Secret History by Donna Tartt; Gods and Monsters and Surprising Myself by Christopher Bram; and the one he was now reading, Interview with The Vampire. On the right side of the row, novels that had been added in the last year. On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong; Kindred by Octavia Butler; The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern; The Overstory by Richard Powers; Seveneves by Neal Stephensen; Blackout by Justin Torres; and Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz.
Bobby told him to read the book by Vuong next, and he tilted the book out knowing he would do so. It seemed important to Bobby, and he knew to read it may reveal something else about the person he cared so much about.
Bobby came in just before eleven, smiling like he possessed a secret. John Henry looked up from the book he had been reading and smiled back, wondering what they were smiling about.
“What is it?” said John Henry.
“The restaurant was busy tonight, and we had some of the baseball team come in for dinner.”
“And?”
“I got huge tip from the three players. Three hundred bucks from each of them.”
“Shit! That’s nine hundred.”
“With my other tips, I made a little over twelve hundred.”
“Damn.”
“I didn’t see Dallas or Eli when I came in.”
“They went on one of their date nights.”
“So, we have the apartment to ourselves?”
John Henry tossed the book on the nightstand and came to his knees on the bed. “Yes,” he replied as he began to unbutton his shirt.
Bobby laughed, then moved toward the bathroom. “I need to get a shower first. I feel grubby and still smell that seafood platter that was the special tonight.”
“I’ll shower with you,” said John Henry, following Bobby into the bathroom.
John Henry undressed Bobby, kissing each newly exposed place. He kissed the chest, then tongued the right nipple. He kissed just above the waistband of the black pants, the stomach moving inward with a drawing in of breath. He pulled the pants down, then the boxers and kissed the abdomen just above the pubic hair, dragged his nose through it, then kissed the cock. He kissed along its length, then took the head in his mouth and tugged and tongued it until it was erect.
“John Henry,” whispered Bobby.
John Henry stood and held his arms up letting Bobby tug his T-shirt over his head. He watched his boxers get pushed down until they dropped to his ankles and he stepped out of them and into the shower, pulling Bobby to follow.
He bathed Bobby, shampooed the light brown hair that seemed lighter in the San Diego sun. Bobby backed under the spray, head tilted back, to rinse the shampoo and soap suds away. John Henry went to his knees and took the cock and stroked it a few times, then he took it in his mouth. He worked lips along its length, tongued it, kissed it, everything he knew to do that brought Bobby pleasure.
Bobby leaned back, shoulders on the tiled wall, pushing hips outward for John Henry, who was in no hurry to get him off. John Henry took his time, sucked slowly, gently, for as long as Bobby could endure it, but when the hips began to move, to pump the cock in his mouth, he increased his ministrations, worked his mouth on it to push Bobby to release.
“John Henry; I’m going to cum,” said Bobby.
The cock flexed in John Henry’s mouth, swelled thicker, then filled his mouth with cum.
Bobby turned to the wall and looked over his shoulder at John Henry. Their eyes locked together, communicating silently for words were not necessary. John Henry moved to Bobby. He kissed the back of the neck and along the shoulders as he rubbed the ass, slipped fingers between the cheeks, then penetrated the tight opening with one finger, then two, and eventually three, loosening the tightness.
John Henry eased his cock into Bobby, gently, slowly, pushing halfway into him. Then he slow fucked, working his cock through the tightness, relishing the feel of it along his cock. He pushed inward deeper and deeper until pressing against the ass. He pushed in once and held still while nipping the base of the neck and tugging on the earlobe.
“John Henry! Fuck me,” Bobby exclaimed.
John Henry held the waist and fucked. He built up his pace, thrusting into Bobby’s depths. Abdomen smacked against ass and Bobby’s moans and cries echoed in the bathroom. John Henry felt the building surge, his need for release, and he began to push into Bobby with urgency. He leaned against the back while working his hips. He buried his face into the crook of the neck and shoulder and shoved into Bobby’s depths and shuddered and jerked with release.
John Henry held Bobby feeling the warmth of the familiar body, how it fit against him when spooned together. He heard the soft, uneven breathing, knowing Bobby was fast asleep, exhausted after a long day at the restaurant. It seemed like a dream, but knew in so many ways, it was better than any dream. He closed his eyes and relaxed, letting his mind drift until dreaming of the beach, the sun setting over the waters, with Bobby strolling in the surf coming toward him.
Honolulu, Hawaii
The aircraft carrier was somewhere in the Pacific but for Petty Officer Daniel Cooper, after a short plane flight, he was in Honolulu because it was time for his leave. He strolled across the tarmac wondering when Bill would catch up with him. They had met before shipping out three years ago, and since then had maintained a ‘friends with benefits’ relationship. It was tough on-board ship, because they were in different parts of the carrier and far too often had different shifts. Not until they were on shore leave could they have any real time together.
“Daniel!”
Daniel turned to see Bill rushing through the other crew, duffel bag swinging back and forth in the right hand. He stopped waiting on Bill to catch up.
“Hey, you ready to get to the hotel?” said Bill.
“You know it.”
Bill smiled, then fell in next to Daniel as they made their way to where taxis waited. As they walked side by side, Daniel wondered if Bill ever considered something more than just the casual relationship. Something more long term, like a real partnership, knowing as long as they were in the Navy it would be difficult.
They went into downtown and checked into the hotel on Kalakaua Avenue. They were not right on the beach, but neither cared about the view. They rode up to the tenth floor and moved down the hall to their room, smiling mischievously at each other.
In the room, duffel bags tossed down on the floor, Daniel grabbed Bill and brought the two of them down on the bed, not even bothering to close the blinds.
“Fuck, it’s been too long,” uttered Daniel, then he rolled Bill to his back and moved on top of him. They kissed while moving body against body.
Daniel sat up, allowing Bill to do the same and they stripped off their shirts, tossing them to the side. They kissed while moving hands over the other’s bare chest.
“Fuck, I’ve got to get out of these clothes,” said Daniel rolling to the side and working his pants undone.
“Yeah, get naked,” said Bill playfully, doing the same.
Daniel pushed Bill to lay flat, and he sucked his cock. He moved on it as if starved. He stroked it, sucked it, tongued and moved lips down it until tonguing the loose nut sack. He worked the nuts and stroked the cock. When Bill began to work his hips, Daniel knew he had him. He had Bill pushed to the edge, and he moved back to the cock and sank his mouth down on it. He worked his mouth up and down until Bill began to pump upward, and he held his mouth open over the cock, letting it slide over his tongue.
“Fuck,” Bill exclaimed, then shuddered with release, pumping cum into Daniel’s mouth.
Daniel straddled the chest and pushed his cock down to the open mouth and sank halfway into it. He worked his hips, so aroused he knew he wouldn’t last long. It had been too long since their last time and he was too wound up. He leaned over the head, hands bracing him on the wall, and worked his hips, pumping the cock into Bill’s mouth. He struggled to control himself, to work his hips smoothly, but he pressed against the wall and kept working his hips. Worked them until his cock became so sensitive he was gasping for breath, then he pushed into the mouth and growled with his release, feeling the mouth swallowing around his spurting cock.
Daniel held the ankles, legs spread wide apart, as he fucked Bill. Fucked him with a relentless pace. The bed rocked beneath them as he drove cock into the ass. He worked his hips steadily, until sweat tricked down his chest and back. He slid his hands from the ankles down to behind the knees and pushed the legs forward then down until thighs were tight to the chest and the ass angled up. He pushed his cock down aligning with the ass and buried every inch into it. He fucked, hips smacking against it
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” exclaimed Bill.
And Daniel fucked. Fucked until sweat rained down on Bill. The bed rocked beneath them and Bill’s cock drooled on his stomach. Daniel fucked to cum, drove into the depths of the ass relentlessly, until his rhythm was off, his need for release overwhelming, and he slammed down into it and shuddered and jerked as his cock pumped out another load.
They lay side by side, turned enough to allow Daniel to pump cock into Bill’s ass. Bill stroked his cock begging Daniel to keep going. To keep fucking him as he stroked his cock. Then he threw his head back against Daniel and covered his chest and stomach with cum. Once Bill was spent, Daniel rolled him to his stomach and moved over him. He was too aroused, cock so hard it ached for another release. He knew it wouldn’t be much a third time, but the fucking it would take would be exhausting, finally taking away the unrelenting yearning he had been enduring back on board the carrier.
He wrapped an arm around Bill’s neck and bear hugged him while working his hips, body undulating on top of him. He would fuck a long time, to the point Bill was begging him to cum, and eventually he would do so.
Daniel went out on the balcony and looked left toward the Pacific Ocean. Looking back to make sure Bill was still asleep, he unlocked his cellphone and brought up Benjamin’s number. They sent letters to each other on occasion, and the last few disturbed him, made him feel like he didn’t know his own family.
It had been two years since their parents told Eli to leave. Benjamin had not been there, didn’t find out about it until late that night when he and Cheryl got back from Wichita. They had gone shopping and had a quiet dinner alone, the kids with her parents. By then Eli was long gone and no one knew where. Benjamin assumed Eli would come back, just needed time to settle down, but after a few days, it was obvious Eli wasn’t coming back, not any time soon.
Daniel recalled the first phone call with Benjamin, how angry he had been, at times seeming to blame Eli for leaving and not coming back, then blaming their parents for making him leave. Daniel knew the one Benjamin blamed most was himself for not being there when it happened. Not being there to stop Eli.
What happened between Eli and mom and dad?
I don’t know exactly, but I think…Daniel, I think Eli was messing around with Sean McMahon.
Who’s that?
This kid Eli went through school with, lives in town. His father is a pharmacist.
Oh shit. At that drug store on Main? I remember him and his son. A tow-headed boy.
Yep, that’s the one. All the girls chased him around at Eli’s birthday parties.
Daniel had pictured his little brother when he turned twelve and how carefree he had been. Then he remembered how Eli and Sean ended up separated from the others, realizing it was there for the seeing, if one had just looked. It made him wonder how everyone didn’t see it with him before he left for the Navy.
Daniel had so many opportunities to come out, tell Benjamin and their parents he was gay. But once in the Navy it was so easy to just not do it. Put it off until next time, which never seemed to be the right time when it came. But after Eli left, he wondered if things would have been different for Eli if he had come out. He knew it probably would have made no difference, not to their parents. He would have been considered the same as Eli, no longer a part of the family.
Two fucking years and nothing. He hadn’t even gotten a letter, making him wonder if Eli thought Benjamin and he had turned their backs on him too. It saddened and angered him to think of it, not sure who to direct the latter.
He brought up Benjamin’s number and hit send. It rang twice and the familiar voice answered as if breathless.
“Daniel! Have you heard from him?”
Not a hello, or how are you doing, but a rush to know if he had heard from Eli. He understood it.
“No, and I assume you’ve not heard anything.”
“No. Daniel, I keep looking for him but…nothing. It’s like he dropped off the face of the earth.”
“What about that friend of his?”
“Sarah? I’ve not talked to her in some time, but she promised to call me if she heard from him.”
“He may have asked her to not say anything.”
A long silence, then Benjamin spoke in a low voice. “I think that would be worse, to know he made contact with someone other than me.”
“But you didn’t tell him to leave.”
“I should have been here.”
And I should have come out long ago. When Eli first seemed to turn inward, no longer outgoing, sometime in the ninth or tenth grade. Or after Eli graduated high school, when he didn’t seem to have any kind of social life.
“You need to stop blaming yourself. I’ve wondered what I could have done to change things, but at the end of the day, it was mom and dad who did it. I’m not sure how to process that.”
“That was obvious when you were here at Christmas the last two years.”
“Did you search social media sites? Surely, he has a profile—”
“Yes, I keep looking. He deleted the one he had and since then…nothing.”
Daniel looked across the city while neither of them said anything. He wondered if he should tell Benjamin, see how he would respond to finding out both of his brothers were gay.
“Where are you?” said Benjamin.
“Honolulu.”
“Must be nice.”
“Well, I came from the airport to the hotel and crashed. May get out tomorrow and play tourist but I’ve seen most of the attractions.”
“Are you going to reenlist?”
Daniel had told Benjamin he might do so, but since Eli was still missing in action and with him reconsidering his relationship with Bill, he had changed his mind.
“I think I’m going to let my expiration date come and live a nice simple life somewhere.”
“But not here.”
It was stated as a fact and Daniel wondered what Benjamin knew.
“Maybe on the west coast somewhere. Close to the water.”
“How long?”
“Four months.”
“That will be here before you know it.”
“How is Cheryl and the kids?”
“Good. Dana turned nine and Kevin starts first grade in the fall.”
“Damn. You’re getting old, brother.”
“You don’t have to tell me.”
“Tell them I said hello. I need to hang up.”
“I will…and Daniel.”
“Yes?”
“If you know someone…”
“I’ll see if I can find out something.”
“Thanks Daniel.”
“Bye Benjamin.”
Yosemite National Park
Dallas set up the tent for Eli and him, as John Henry set up the other tent. He still couldn’t believe they were finally on a vacation. A real vacation, and to a place he had always wanted to go. John Henry and Bobby had taken some convincing, both not keen on sleeping in a tent, but he saw the excitement in the two of them now that they had finally made it.
They had been planning the vacation for over a year. There had been a late night where the four of them were sitting on the beach looking at the moonlight reflect off the water. They talked about all the things they had never got to do and how the possibility was before them. At some point they began a list of places they wanted to visit. Places they could go on vacation.
Seeing Bobby set up the camp stove, Dallas smiled at how there was never any talk of separate vacations. It was just assumed they would go together, like a family. Then he realized they were not like a family, but they were a family, in their own way.
He recalled some of the places they had mentioned. New York City, Washington, D.C., Yellowstone National Park, the Grand Canyon, Key West, New Orleans, Paris, Rome, and Australia. But when they started making real plans, knowing money would still be tight, he had said Yosemite National Park.
“Here’s the sleeping bags,” said Eli, coming back into the camp site.
They hiked some of the trails, then made plans for the next day to visit waterfalls and hike to some of the main overlooks for the valley. They were set up for six days in the park and intended to make the most of it. After grilling some burgers and sitting around the campfire reliving their day’s adventures, they went into their tents to call it a night.
“Bobby, take them off,” whispered John Henry.
“Shhh,” Bobby replied, then whispered even lower, “they’ll hear.”
“No, they won’t. Dallas will be too preoccupied letting Eli fuck him,” whispered John Henry playfully right in Bobby’s ear. “Now get them off,” he repeated, tugging on Bobby’s shorts.
On the other side of the site, Eli and Dallas were sitting in their tent, fumbling to get hiking boots off. Then they stripped off their shirts, pants, and boxers. Eli grabbed Dallas and held him down; one knee pushed up between the legs. He leaned down and they kissed, passionately, until moaning and letting their hands roam over the other.
John Henry lay on his stomach as Bobby hovered over him. Cock bore into his depths, slowly, gently, pushing inward until hips were against his ass. Bobby was already breathing hard, struggling with his arousal and passions.
“Bobby…keep going,” John Henry whispered.
Bobby slow fucked John Henry, pushed inward until hips pressed against the ass. He held himself over him, hands planted either side of the upper body, and worked his hips, tugging cock outward until nearly slipping free, then pushing inward all the way. Over time, he built up his pace, fucked with greater urgency until he could hold back no longer.
“John Henry,” Bobby uttered breathlessly, as he pushed into the depths of the ass and shuddered with release.
He rolled to the side and once John Henry was on his back, he leaned over and took the hard leaking cock into his mouth and sucked. He moved his lips on it, tongued it, and worked the head until John Henry was pushing upward. Then he buried it in his mouth as it swelled thicker then gushed wad after wad into his swallowing mouth.
Eli lay on his back and watched the dark silhouette move up and down on his cock. It was too dark to see his cock disappear in the ass, but he felt it, how that tight opening moved on it, up and down, relentlessly. Hands came down on his chest, and he felt the fingers dig into the muscle of each pec as the ass moved faster on his cock.
“Give it to me,” Dallas whispered.
It was like a trigger was pulled. Eli grabbed the waist and pulled Dallas down on his spurting cock.
Then he was manhandling Dallas, moving him to his back, and he buried his still hard cock back into the ass and began to fuck again, to work his cock in the slick ass, feeling his first load being pumped out. He leaned down and kissed Dallas to keep from crying out. And he fucked, fucked until he felt feverish.
Dallas was jacking off, for he felt the hand on the cock rubbing his stomach, and he kept fucking. Dallas moaned through clinched teeth as cum hit his stomach and he pumped his cock in the spasming ass knowing it would push Dallas to the breaking point. Then he pushed inward all the way and came again.
Bobby came out of tent to find the others at the picnic table drinking coffee. He poured himself a cup and sat next to John Henry.
“Did you sleep last night?” said Eli.
“After all that fucking, I’m sure he got a good night’s sleep,” joked Dallas.
“Yeah, well we heard you and Eli,” said Bobby.
“Oh Eli, fuck me, fuck me,” John Henry mimicked, making everyone laugh.
After they finished their coffee and were just sitting quietly, looking around them at the beauty of the park, Dallas finally broke the silence.
“Are you going to write your dad?”
Everyone knew John Henry had called Sam Worthington after receiving the letter telling of his father coming into the store. John Henry cried as he and Sam talked late into the night. After the call, John Henry told them how his dad appeared to have gotten sober and cleaned up. Sam had driven by his old home and saw it had been repainted and yard neatly cut.
“When we get back, I’ll write him.”
“Do you know what you’ll say?” said Eli.
“No idea,” replied John Henry chuckling. “What do you say to someone who…”
“Yeah, really, what do you say.”
“I just know I’m no longer angry and not going to let him, or anyone else, ruin my life.”
“At least you have a chance at something with your dad,” said Bobby, making everyone frown.
During the phone call with Sam, it came out Bobby’s father disappeared after getting early release.
USS Theodore Roosevelt
Daniel sat next to Enzo Torelli, a fellow Petty Officer, at one of the long tables in the mess deck.
“Daniel.”
“Enzo. Did Bill tell you what I need?”
“Yes. Not sure if my friend can help you or not, but when you get back on dry land, call them at this number,” said Enzo, sliding a small, folded piece of paper over to him.
“Thanks.”
“So, this brother. He just dropped out of sight?”
“Our parents found out he’s gay and told him to leave.”
“Shit. That must really hurt, especially for you.”
Daniel looked at Enzo wondering how much he knew. He saw the smile and nod, then Enzo turned back to his tray.
“I guess it is obvious to some on board,” said Daniel.
“Oh yeah. I’m just wondering if I’ll get an invite to the wedding,” Enzo joked.
“First person on the list,” said Daniel as he slipped the paper into his shirt pocket.
Kansas
Benjamin stood in the back yard watching the sun rise for the start of another day. He looked across the field of wheat stubble, the crop recently harvested. It was part of his land, not his parents, thus saved from their bankruptcy a couple of years ago. It was not much compared to most other farms in the area, but with Cheryl working as an anesthesiologist at Hutchinson Regional, they had a good life. She had helped him when it became apparent his parents were in trouble, his dad overextending himself too much. They separated the land, got their books in order, and when the bank came for his parent’s farm, he was spared. He felt guilty about it, but his dad told him numerous times he did the right thing protecting himself and his family.
He loved his parents but there were times they infuriated him, at no time as much as when he found out they told Eli to leave just before the bank came. He wondered if his dad thought he was doing Eli a favor, pushing him to leave before the bankruptcy, but after hearing his mother’s comments he knew that wasn’t the case.
He thought of the phone call with Daniel and hoped he could find out something about Eli. It tore at him to think his little brother could be out there struggling just to survive. Daniel had been smart to leave, to not wait for their parents to find out he too was gay. They never talked about it, but he had known for some time. He found the images on Daniel’s laptop when he was a senior in high school. Both of his younger brothers were gay. It made him chuckle at times, and other times, he worried about them, none more so than Eli, the one missing.
He strolled along the edge of the field heading to the barn. He wondered why there were times he felt like he had been left behind. His brothers gone to a life he wasn’t allowed to be a part of. It was such a foolish thought, knowing he was the one accepted, the good son who stayed and had a family. He did what was expected. But he knew what was expected wasn’t always right.
Reunion
Bobby lay on his back, legs over John Henry’s shoulders, as they fucked. It was mid-morning, and they knew Dallas and Eli would be sleeping in after going out with some of their friends the night before. It had given John Henry and him the apartment to themselves. Despite their night of fucking to the point of exhaustion, they woke aroused, wanting each other until the point Boddy was taking John Henry’s fuck. Every thrust into his depths as he stroked his own cock.
“Fuck me. Fuck me, John Henry,” Bobby pleaded.
John Henry held himself over Bobby and fucked the upturned ass. The legs rubbed his shoulders with his movement, and he saw how Bobby stared up, glassy eyed with desire. He worked his hips until gasping for breath and sweat trickled down his face and back.
“Bobby, I love you,” said John Henry, and he meant it more than he could describe in words.
John Henry kept up his pace until he saw Bobby’s head tilt back and a cry of release escaped the open mouth. Then he smelled the cum covering the stomach, and he could no longer hold back, and pushed into Bobby’s depths and shuddered with release.
In the shower they kissed and bathed each other. They were playful and jovial. When they climbed out, John Henry took the towel and dried Bobby first.
A knock on the door.
“Who can that be?” said Bobby.
“I don’t know,” said John Henry, wrapping a towel around his waist. He left the bathroom, came to see the other bedroom door was still closed as someone knocked again. “I’m coming,” he whispered to himself exasperated with the loud knocking.
He unlocked the door and swung it open. It was a guy with a military haircut wearing a white T-shirt and jeans. Before the guy could speak, he saw the similar features. The dirty blonde hair, the same blue eyes, even the tall stature, although not as stocky. A leaner build, but just as muscular.
“Hey, I’m sorry, but does Elijah Barnett live here?”
“Who’s asking?” said John Henry, knowing it had to be Daniel, the brother in the military.
“I’m his brother, Daniel, and Benjamin and I have been searching for him.”
“You’ve been looking for me?” said Eli, coming up behind John Henry.
Daniel grimaced, then looked down shaking his head. When he looked up, he appeared to be about to cry. “Yes, little brother. We’ve been looking for your ass since you left.”
“But I thought—”
“You thought wrong.”
For the longest second, Eli and Daniel stared at each other. Eli guided John Henry to step back inside as he came into the door frame. He looked at Daniel as if testing him.
“I was told to leave because I’m gay.”
“I know and it was wrong.”
“You’re okay with it?”
“Yes, of course I’m okay with it. Can I come in so we can talk?”
Eli stepped aside, letting Daniel enter. He saw the appraisal of their place, how Daniel looked around, seeming surprised by what the four of them had managed to do. John Henry disappeared into his bedroom and Bobby came out. Dallas was standing at the dining table watching with concern.
“Are you Eli’s boyfriend,” said Daniel approaching Dallas with a hand held out.
“Yes,” said Dallas taking it as he glanced over to Eli who shrugged.
“You’re the one who helped Eli when he needed it. I’m sorry I wasn’t around.”
“Are you?” said Eli.
Daniel turned to Eli. “More than you can know. Benjamin too. Did you know he didn’t know you were told to leave until late that night.”
“No, I assumed he—”
“Elijah.”
It brought Eli up short to hear his name like that. “Daniel.”
“Do you know why I left for the military as soon as I graduated high school and stayed in it until now?”
“The farm wasn’t big enough for Benjamin and you to be a part of it.”
“That was a good excuse but not the reason.”
“He’s gay too,” said John Henry, standing in the door to the bedroom tying the drawstring on a pair of gym shorts.
Eli looked at John Henry, shocked at the comment, then to Daniel. “Is that true?”
“Yes, Elijah. I left because I was gay and didn’t want to come out to our parents.”
“Can’t blame you for that,” uttered Dallas.
“Does Benjamin know?”
“I thought he didn’t know but I found out he has known for some time. It seems he found my browser history back in high school.”
“All this time…” Eli uttered to himself.
Daniel stood on the balcony, sliding door open so he could hear Bill and Dallas joking around about something. Bill had come over when Eli suggested they have dinner together at the apartment. He glanced back as he hit send on his cellphone then listened to it ring. Bobby was in an armchair with John Henry sitting on the floor between his legs. Eli and Bill were on the sofa and Dallas was in the other armchair. He considered the scene, how the four guys had made a home for themselves. The efforts to stabilize their lives and slowly improve them. He wondered how Bill and he would fit into it, since they were going to settle in San Diego too. The ring stopped and he heard Benjamin’s excited voice.
“Daniel, did you find him?”
“Yes, big brother, I found him.”
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