Adam
The flower on the passenger seat was a constant reminder of how I fucked up my relationship with Josh. I sat in my car, staring blankly ahead, I dreaded going in the station, getting on shift with Mike. I didn’t know how I felt about him anymore, or how I would react when I saw him, one thing I was certain though was the sadness within me.
Josh couldn’t even talk to me… I don’t know what to do anymore, I am a stupid fucking idiot, I let my dick control me, and now I lost my friend…my ex-boyfriend? God, I know we weren’t dating, but it sure feels like a break up…I miss him already, all those blowjobs were great, but I miss talking to him, I miss kissing him, I miss waking up next to him…I think I’m genuinely in love with him…you don’t know what you have until it’s gone, I wished I’d have done more with him, if I wasn’t so scared of admitting I’m attracted to a guy, trying new things…I’m not ready to lose him…
My eyes started getting teary, I should be inside getting on shift for work, instead I was sitting in the parking lot crying, wallowing in my sorrow. I dreaded walking in the station, facing Mike after what we did, what he did to me. He set me up, tricking me into fucking him, and sent Josh the video. He ruined my relationship, I could feel my blood boiling as I spiral, when suddenly someone knocked on the window, startling me.
“What the hell are you doing here?” It was Jack, the Captain. I quickly wiped my tears secretly, trying to act normal.
“I...I’m just resting, sir. I’m not feeling well.”
“What is going on with you two? I found Mike hiding in the locker room, and now you?” Captain sighed, “Come on, come to my office. We need to talk.”
I followed the Captain inside, and as we entered the captain’s office, I stopped at the door when I realized Mike was already there, sitting on the chair. Mike turned to us, equally shocked by my presence, we stared at each other.
“Adam, sit down.” The Captain ordered, I hesitated, but eventually I treaded forward, and sat next to Mike. The Captain sat opposite us over his desk, glaring at us. “What is going on? Either one of you is going to tell me.” He paused, staring us down. “Who’s going to talk?”
“Sir…nothing happened…” Mike said weakly, “Can we just get back to work?”
“No you are not! Both of you are hiding from each other instead of working as partners, I can tell something is bothering you two. I don’t care what you do outside of work. But don’t affect your work here.” The Captain shouted, “Talk now!”
“Sir, it’s private business between us, but…I don’t think I can trust Mike anymore…I request to change my partner.” I said. Seeing Mike for the first time after everything made me realize how angry I was with him. I could hardly hold myself together without punching him.
“What the fuck Adam! You can’t trust me?” Mike said in disbelief, and clearly very hurt. “I get that you want Josh instead of me, but this is too far!”
“Don’t you dare talk about Josh!” Hearing Mike said his name opened the flood gate. I darted up from the chair and stared at him with my piercing eyes. The captain was the only thing keeping me from lunging at him. “I fucked you instead of him! He’s gone! Are you happy now? You ruined everything!”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You set me up! You send him the video!” I screamed at him.
“What? What video?”
“Stop pretending you don’t know!” I yelled, and I lost control. I stepped forward and grabbed his collar.
“Enough! Stop it, Adam!” The Captain stepped in and broke us apart, “Enough of this! You two are going solo until everything settles. Mike, go out and work. Adam, stay, we need to talk.”
I slumped down on my chair as I watched Mike walk off the office, I was raging, depressed and exhausted all at once. I couldn’t look at the captain, I knew I overreacted, I let my anger take over.
“You were way over the line.” The captain sat on the desk in front of me, speaking with a softer voice, “This isn’t like you, tell me, what is going on?” I broke down immediately, I cried and cried, letting all my emotions out. I told him everything, everything that happened with Josh, Mike and I. I had no idea how much I needed someone to talk to, and I was glad Captain was here to listen.
“So you are saying they recorded you without consent and sent it to your boyfriend?”
“Not my boyfriend…it’s complicated…but yeah, that’s the jist of it.” I said, calmed down a little. “I can’t believe him, how could he do that to me! I thought we were friends!”
“Maybe that’s the problem, he doesn’t want to be friends…love makes people do all sorts of crazy things” the captain sighed, and said, “I’ll talk to Mike, get his side of the story…” He paused for a moment, and asked, “Are you feeling okay? You can stay in the station and work on some paperwork, I’m not risking an unstable officer out there.”
“I’ll be fine.” I groaned, “I’m just overwhelmed, and exhausted. I thought I’ll be happy, trying new things, having fun, and I even thought I could date somebody, but I guess not. Look what all that got me, nothing but pain and suffering…”
“Nothing wrong with exploring and getting out there, you will find someone eventually. I know you will, you are a catch.” The captain patted my shoulder as he said, “Tell you what, my wife is having a small trip out of town leaving me alone in the house this weekend. How about having a guys night, just the two of us? You can let off some steam, relax a little.”
“Thanks, captain, that sounds nice actually.” I said, as I began to choke up a little. All that reminded me of Josh, all the playdates when he would come over, all the nights we spent together. I missed him, and for some twisted reason I wanted that feeling of having company back, instead of the constant void I was feeling.
“Great! Now get back to work.” The Captain smiled, and patted my shoulder again, before gesturing me to go out. I took a deep breath and sauntered out.
I was laying in bed after a long day, Luke was already in bed. It was usually my time to take care of business, but I wasn’t in the mood. I tried, I was naked in bed, fondling my hard cock, but it didn’t feel right. I couldn’t stop thinking about Josh.
Why can’t I just jerk off and call it a day? Stupid brain, just stop thinking and let me shoot my load in peace! Fuck! This is just depressing, I have my erection in my hand and all I can do is whine…I miss Josh, I’m so lonely all of a sudden…I survived years of being a single dad, so why can’t I be content? Why do I suddenly want someone next to me in bed, spooning me to sleep…and why does it have to be Josh, why can’t I imagine anyone else…
I sighed in defeat, ignoring my throbbing hard cock, I rolled over and hugged my spare pillows. As much as I wanted to jerk off, loneliness was consuming me, I desperately needed someone to be by my side. Out of desperation, I downloaded Grindr. I wasn’t expecting to hook up with anybody, but I needed someone to talk to, I couldn’t stand being alone in bed anymore, and talking to a random stranger seemed like a great alternative for a distraction.
I had no idea what I was doing when I was setting up my profile, all these terms and labels, I had no clue what all that meant. One thing I was certain though was that almost everyone on the app had a sexy profile picture. I rolled out of bed and headed to the bathroom, and looked into the mirror. I didn’t usually check myself out, I flexed my muscles as I looked at myself, watching my beefy, hairy body as I aimed my phone camera at the reflection. I didn’t look half bad, although I’d like to lose some weight, I could still see the muscles under the reddish hair, I snapped a few pictures of my naked torso, didn’t show my face, and uploaded them.
As I laid back down in bed, I was mesmerized by the sheer amount of men on the app as I scrolled and scrolled. Most of them had shirtless, or nude photos barely covering their private parts. I kept on ogling on the naked pictures, absent minded scratching my pubic hair and lightly touching my hard cock.
I didn’t expect to see so many people on this app, apparently I was clueless, there are so many gay people around me, and I have no idea. What am I supposed to do? There are so many hot guys out there, should I start messaging people? What do I even say? I don’t even know what all these terms mean…twink, bear, vers…well I know what top and bottom means, but…am I a top, or a bottom? I don’t fucking know…
I was confused, and scared, when a notification popped up. Someone messaged me. “Are you new here? Haven’t seen you before.” A guy named Tommy asked.
“I’m new to this guy on guy stuff. Decided to check this app out.” I replied. Out of curiosity, I clicked on his profile. Tommy wasn’t shy at all, his profile picture showed his full face, along with his hairy burly body, with his hands barely covering his crotch. I did a double take at the picture, he looked familiar, and then it hit me. I had seen him around the neighborhood, he lived a few houses down the road. We would occasionally see each other from time to time, and share nods and greetings. It was a strange moment to find out someone you know was into guys, like I uncovered a secret, except he wasn’t hiding it in any way.
“Oh welcome to the team.” Tommy said.
“I feel like I should say it before we go too far into it. You live in house 1312 right? I think I’ve seen you before.”
“Yup, that’s me! And you are that hot cop right? I didn’t know you were into this, or else I’d have gotten myself arrested.”
“How did you know?”
“There aren’t many redheads around here, and definitely no one as hot and sexy as you.”
“Well thanks, you are very hot yourself.”
“So, what are you looking for? You said in your profile you want company, what kind of company do you want?”
“I don’t really know, I guess I want to talk to someone.”
“So no funny business? Gotcha.”
“I mean, it wouldn’t hurt to have some fun.” I blushed as I typed.
“Oh yeah? How about this, we ask each other questions, and when someone answers the question, the other one has to send a picture back.”
“You mean nudes?”
“Whatever you want, but I won’t hold back.”
“Ok, deal.”
“Alright! Do you want to ask first?”
“Sure. First question, how did you know you are into guys?”
“Wow, you get in deep fast! Well, I used to think I was straight, but I was always into ass play, but my ex wife wasn’t into it. So one time I was on a trip with a bunch of friends, and one thing lead to another, I let them fuck me, and I loved it. That’s how it all started.”
“Wait, you used to be straight?”
“It’s not your turn yet for another question. And I’ll need a picture from you, thank you.”
My cock twitched with the idea of sending my first nude to a man. I turned on the camera on my phone, and aimed it at myself. I decided not to be too forward, so I adjusted the frame to include just my face and my hairy pecs, and sent it to Tommy.
“You are so hot, Adam. I want to suck those nipples.”
“Thanks. Your turn.” I blushed, it was always nice to have people complimenting my body.
“What have you done so far? With a man.”
“I used to fool around with a friend, we sucked each other off, and I almost fucked him one time.” I thought it would trigger my emotion talking about Josh, but with Tommy, although I was still sad thinking about Josh, I was calmer than expected. “Oh, and I fucked a coworker, and it was a mess.”
“Tell me about it. I got caught jerking off in the office by my boss, and he fucked me afterwards. Almost got me fired.” Tommy said, and a few seconds later, he sent me a picture. He was standing in front of a tall mirror, his whole body was in frame. Nothing was left unseen, as he held his hand at the base of his thick hard cock, waving it at the camera.
“That's a nice picture. You have a nice cock, I think yours is thicker than mine.”
“Ok, now I need to see it.”
“You might get to see it if you answer my question. This is embarrassing, but what do bear and vers mean? I see them in your profile.”
“A bear is a man with a hairy and thicker body, so we are both bears. Vers is short for versatile, it means I can be both top or bottom. Do you know about top and bottom?”
“Yeah that’s the only thing I know. And I just answered your question, pay up.” I was slowly easing up to Tommy. I grinned as I held my stiff cock up and took a picture, and sent it to him.
“Fuck! You are so hot! With a cock like that you can fuck me anytime you want.” Following his message, Tommy sent me another picture. This time he was in bed, with one of his legs propped up. He wasn’t touching his penis, but it was stiff enough to stay in the air, a string of precum slowly rolling down onto his hairy stomach.
“Are you jerking off now?” I asked, my hands gravitated towards my throbbing cock as I studied his picture in detail.
“Yes, I can’t help it. I’m so hard right now.”
“Me too. Stroke your hard cock for me.” I said, as I rubbed my reddened cock head, and gently pushed the underside, a drop of precum formed at the slit. I snapped another picture. I took a close up of my leaking cock, and sent it to Tommy.
“Fuck yeah, I’m dying to lick it off you. Why don’t you come over, you know where I live.”
“I can’t, my son is asleep, I’m not leaving him alone.”
“I can go to you.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“Yes! And that’s another question answered, you owe me now.”
“Fine. But be quick, and don’t ring the bell. I don’t want to wake up my son.”
I got off my bed, and threw on a bathrobe. Tommy didn’t live far away, he would be here any moment. I sneaked down the stairs and waited in the living room, peeking out the window from time to time, and finally, I saw a man approaching the front door. As I opened the door, I stopped for a moment to admire the man. It was dark outside so I didn’t notice before, but standing in front of me was a shirtless man with sweatpants on, his stocky body was exposed to the air, with a thick coat of black hair covering his huge pecs, and leading down his belly. His hard cock jutted out in front, he wasn’t wearing any underwear as I could clearly see the outline of his cock head, nodding slightly as he moved.
“You know I can arrest you for public indecency dressing like that right?” I smirked, as I pinched his tip.
“I’ve worn less. I’m an exhibitionist.” Tommy grinned, as he slowly pulled down the front of his pants, revealing his stiffened cock. “I’d totally walk here naked if not for your son. Don’t want to accidentally flash a kid.” He said, letting me fondle his cock without the fabric in between. “Are you gonna arrest me now, officer? You know, that’s one of my fantasies.”
“You are unbelievable…just follow me, and be quiet.” I retrieved my hand and guided him to my bedroom. As soon as we entered the bedroom and locked the door behind us, I dropped my robe, showing my naked body to Tommy.
“Fucking hell! You look even sexier in person.” He groaned, as he pulled his sweatpants down, and took off his shoes. With both of us naked, we walked to the bed, wasting no time to grope each other. Our bodies collided, our hands reached and roamed on our hairy torso, and Tommy pushed me onto the bed, kneeling down and grasping my hard cock. “I need it in my mouth right now…” He said, as he gave it a few tugs, and put my thick cock all the way in his mouth.
“Ugh…fuck…” I moaned, he was exceptionally good at it, as he wrapped his lips tightly around my shaft, his tongue licked and swirled around my tip, tracing the veins, he sucked and slurped on it with great passion. I closed my eyes, leaned back and relaxed, enjoying the sensation between my legs. Tommy's hand slid up across my torso, feeling my muscular body, and reached for my nipples. “Oh god! Ugh…this feels amazing…you are so good at this…” I groaned with pleasure, surrendering my body to Tommy as he sucked and teased me.
Tommy kept on playing with my body, moving his mouth up and down my shaft, and this continued for a short while, before he popped my hard cock out, and climbed on the bed. He straddled me, sitting on my crotch as he grinded his ass on my hard dick. “I want to ride this thick cock of yours…” I could hear the lust in his voice, I could feel my cock sliding inside his crack. I moaned, I didn’t resist when he grabbed my hardened cock and aimed it at his eager hole, and slowly sat down on it.
“Ugh…umm…your cock is so thick…” Tommy grunted and said. I could feel my cock slowly stretched his hole open, his ring muscles wrapped around my tip as he slowly pushed down. We both moaned with arousement, and as he pushed lower and lower, my cock plunged deeper inside his warm hole. “Oh fuck…I love your cock so much…” Tommy groaned as he let go and let gravity do its job, his weight pushed his body down and the rest of my cock entered his body.
I should be in lust. I enjoyed the feeling of his hole hugging my throbbing cock tightly, but his words triggered me. Love. He said the word love. My mind wandered and recalled the time I fucked Mike, and it flashed to Josh, a sudden sadness rushed through my body. “Wait…stop!” I yelled. “I…I can’t…sorry.” I said, as I frantically pushed Tommy off my cock.
“What’s wrong?” Tommy asked, confused.
“I…I'm sorry…can we just jerk each other off?” I asked.
“Okay…” Tommy said, I could tell he was disappointed, but still he complied. He laid next to me, and reached for my hard cock, and slowly stroked it. I did the same, grasping his hard cock and ran my hand up and down, both of our cock was already covered in precum, and it didn’t take long for us to cross the edge.
“I’m gonna cum soon…are you cumming?” Tommy asked, his hand vigorously pumping my cock.
“Mhm…I’m close…” I groaned, his big warm hand felt fantastic, I was reaching the finishing line at a rapid pace. I stroked his cock faster and faster, I could feel his body getting tense, his fist clenching on my hard cock…
“I…I’m cumming…” Tommy grunted, and cum started flying out his tip, coating my hand and his hairy torso. I was one step behind him, as I watched him shooting his load, my balls tightened, my cock pulsed as strings of cum shot out, landing on my chest and abs. We both kept on stroking, until we were too sensitive with the touch, and we just laid there catching our breath.
“Thanks.” I said, turning my head to look at Tommy. “This is an odd request, but…can I spoon you?”
“Okay…sure…” He said, as he rolled his back to me. I wrapped my arms around him, feeling my bare chest pressing against his back, I rested my head on his shoulder.
“Thanks again…you have no idea how much I needed this…” I whispered.
“Can I ask you what happened? You seem like you are going through some stuff.” He asked.
“I…I just broke up with…um…a friend.” I said, and I realized this was the first time I said it out loud. I just broke up with Josh.
“You…are you in love with him?” Tommy asked.
“I think so…yeah, I love him.” I said.
“That sucks.” Tommy sighed, and said, “You can spoon me as long as you want.”
“Um…not that long…” I said, “I hate to say this, but you have to go before my son finds out you are here. You are basically a stranger to him.”
“Yeah, I get it. I have two kids, I’d hate them catching me sleeping around with strangers.” Tommy said, trying to get up from the bed.
“No…don’t go yet…” I groaned, and pulled him back down. “Just a little longer.” With that, we stay in position for a while, as I feel the comfort of company in my arms.
