Coming Out in the Seventies

by Paul François

5 May 2019 850 readers Score 6.9 (39 votes) PDF Mobi ePub Txt


Born in a French-Canadian and Catholic family, Maurice turned 13 in 1960. He was as a teenager who witnessed the assassination of John F. Kennedy and the death of Pope John XXIII. The 1960’s were better known as an era of sexual liberation, but Maurice was far removed from that revolution. Sex was never a topic of discussion with his parents, let alone in the classroom since he was sent to a seminary, not so much to become a priest but to follow a classical course leading to a bachelor’s degree in philosophy.

During those eight years, Maurice lived more or less in an aseptic, if not sterile, bubble. No girl friends, no pot, no wild parties. When he entered the workplace, Maurice was still a virgin. At 23, he invited a female colleague to the National Arts Center and played tennis with her. His secretary teased him in spreading the rumor of some possible wedding engagement. Nothing could have been further from the truth.

There comes a time when the bubble has to burst, when fantasies must seek to actualize themselves. In other words, Maurice was attracted to other guys. Was he the only one “like that” in his community? He had heard some cousins talk of a “sissy” uncle, but had no idea at that time what the word really meant. The truth was a blow: “I’m a sissy, a queer, a faggot, a homosexual”. Maurice had no idea how to actualize his sexual fantasy… until he came across a small add in the paper: Male Escort. A guy could come over for one hour and for $60; call…

After a week of dithering, Maurice finally dialed the famous phone number to find out that guy was indeed available the next day. He insisted that he be at least 18-years old. When Dan arrived, Maurice paid the pimp who quickly disappeared, and then invited the rather young guy in his bedroom for his first sexual contact. The reception was cold and the initiation lasted less than eleven minutes. Nothing more than mutual masturbation. Maurice had touched another guy’s cock for the first time.

The following week, Maurice called again Male Escort and insisted to have a partner that he could kiss and suck. “That’s possible, but you have to pay $25 more.” No sooner said than done. Tim looked barely 18, let barely Antoine kiss him, and barely sucked him. On the other hand, Antoine could suck Tim’s thick dick. Bing! Bang! Over! Not really, in fact. A few days later, there was a knock on the door and Maurice was facing two policemen.

- Can we come in?
- What do you want?
- Ask a few questions about your call to Male Escort.
- I requested a guy at least 18 years old.
- The Criminal Code states that homosexuality is legal between two 21-year old men.

The younger and more polite policeman quickly added that they could not care less about what was happening behind closed doors. They only wanted Maurice’s help to arrest the pimp in charge of what was now known as “The Homosexual Vice Ring”. But once Maurice had described the two visits and signed a witness statement, he was arrested for gross indecency. “Oh, my gosh, I went courting for the first time and I was now going to end up in a criminal court.”

When he appeared in the Provincial Court, Criminal Division, Maurice’s lawyer asked him if the young guy across the bench was one of the escorts. “No, I have never seen him before.” As for the Crown, it quickly realized that it had the wrong witness and addressed the judge: “Your Honor, we request that the trial be postponed for a week to complete the work of a very complicated case.” Maurice’s lawyer sprung immediately: “I object, your Honor, my client has already been subjected to the media’s snarling, not to mention the ostracism of his community. It is indecent to want to prosecute without the slightest evidence. This is an abuse of procedure.” The judge agreed and dismissed the case.

Antoine was relieved but also disappointed that the media did not report his acquittal. On the other hand, this experience gave him confidence, enough to make a visit that would change his life. A poster on a telephone poll announced a Gay Drop-In every Friday night near Maurice’s apartment. “I’m not alone, I’m not a sissy, I’m not a faggot, I’m gay and I can meet other guys like me.” The Drop-In was held by Gays of Ottawa in a coop building. The following Friday, Antoine timidly entered the room and was warmly welcomed by another French-Canadian. Many men were civil servants in their late 20’s, just like him. Coming out started that September night of 1974.

The organization did not have a liquor licence and served only soft drinks from 7 to 9 pm. A group would usually go for a beer at closing time and Antoine joined them. To his surprise, they gathered in the downstairs bar of a signature hotel, know to be gay-friendly but closeted. Each week, Antoine discovered a new facet of an underground culture he had never suspected in the nation’s capital: a gay counselling telephone line, a library offering gay and lesbian books, a park known for man-to-man cruising, a gay dance in a community centre two or three times a year…

Most of all, Antoine met a few sex partners who taught him more than mutual masturbation and 69. He had no idea that there were so many “shades of gay”.

by Paul François

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