Flashback: Vintage Underwear and Bulges

You know that feeling you get when you go into an antique store and everything has that burnished, well-worn, classic look that gives you a sense of comfort and nostalgia? Well this is like that except the furniture and decorative objects are men and the sense of comfort and nostalgia is more a sense of arousal and desire.

Though just like an antique shop, sometimes you find something that's tacky as hell like the shiny lounge wear/long johns that are West Hollywood ready.

Next time you're in an antique store that also carries vintage clothes, ask the shopkeeper if he has any vintage underwear. When he invites you to his stockroom while he takes a look, you may find that the answer is no. But he does manage to find his own mouth on your cock.

This is completely my imagination because nothing like this has ever happened to me. The closest would be an auction house where I'd arranged to meet one of the sellers prior to the auction so I could check out a chair.

The chair looked better than it felt. I didn't want to sit on it at all. Rather I wanted to sit on him. Over and over.

Oh why didn't I just say that at the time? I must be afraid of someone saying yes. Which means when I say something like that in the future, I should make sure to carry my own drink and take a sip immediately after I make my indecent proposal.

So I can do a classic spit take if a guy says yes. Else I'll swallow out of deep shame and relief.

Now I'm going to go to an antique shop and stick a pair of my underwear under a couch cushion or inside a grandfather clock. I need to leave someone a time capsule for 2043 when my underwear will qualify as vintage. I'm a giving person.

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