The Houses in Rossford

I just realized i had not posted for several days. I post to other sites and remember to be more regular, but this is because i have comments and a relationship to my readers and feel the obligation to get back to them. Since there are no comments and little relationship to whoever is reading on gaydemon, you will just have to get chapters when i remember. Peace.

Fenn was startled by the door flying open and todd stepping into the bedroom.

“what?”

Todd looked behind him, closed the door, locked the door and then kissed him fiercely.

“if you had seen what i just saw…” he said huskily, unbuttoning fenn’s shirt.

“you want to… right here?”

Todd nodded into fenn’s chest, kissing him up and down and unbuttoning his pants.

“i need to. right here.”

Fenn looked around, flushing.

“right… no, todd! Well… oh, shit. All right.”

And then todd got to his knees and began tugging down his underwear.

“but only if i get to do you next,” fenn said.

“sure thing,” todd mumbled and then pulled fenn into his mouth, like that first time when neither one of them had been with anyone for awhile and they were both thinking about each other all the time, wondering where the relationship would go, waiting for that moment. Todd had been so tired last night, and then when he’d awaken this morning fenn was downstairs with johnny, and todd had to get dressed. He was so wound up now and in his head was the memory of what he’d just seen noah and burt and johnny giving themselves up to. he took fenn in his mouth again and again, licking the head of his cock while he heard fenn moan. He reached up and held his ass in his hands, inserting his fingers, hearing him cry out. he pulled on him, in and out quickly, desperately, mumbling, almost gagging himself. And then fenn pulled out of his mouth and he almost moaned with sadness. But now fenn was dragging todd’s face down, thrusting his tongue in his mouth. And then they were changing places, and todd was planting his hands on fenn’s head. When he’d been really young he’d always wondered what it would be like to touch fenn’s hair. Right now, even when fenn said he needed a haircut it was always soft and coarse all at the same time: springy. He wished he could bury his fingers in it. he wished… ah, shit, he cried out. he moaned and rose up on the balls of his feet, his thighs tensing. It felt so goddamned good. Fenn was between his legs now. now they were helping each other with their shirts, kicking off their pants.

“now each other?” todd whispered.

“yes.”

He went down on fenn again, and fenn positioned himself to take todd in. it seemed like it went on forever. In a corner of his mind todd wondered if everyone wondered where they were. Or if someone knew. He wondered if there were any rooms under here? Who could hear them fucking in this mansion? They were face to face now, todd under him as fenn fucked his stomach and he fucked back and they kissed and fucked and then todd arched up his pelvis and whispered:  “now, In Me.”

It was quick and they pressed tighter and tighter together becoming the same rhythm. Todd squeezed himself amazed as always with fenn inside of him, and fenn gasped now and lost control. They came at the same time, rocking and rolling off of the edge of the world and then, gently, like a closing flower, collapsing together.

“ah… it’s  been… todd began.

“it’s been about two days,” fenn said, and they both laughed.

“we didn’t even take down the bed sheets.

“do you think they all know…? What we just did?”

“do you care? I mean, do you really give a fuck?”

Todd laughed, and they turned to face each other. Todd ran  a hand over fenn’s shoulder.

“i do,” he admitted. “but that’s just me.”

“it wasn’t you when you came in here all… what was that?”

“did you like it? “

Fenn lay on his back.

“i always like you horny.

“you know,” fenn said, “whenever we have sex the good thing is we leave something out.” he sighed. “it’s like there’s always more we could have done. Next time i want you to fuck me.”

“i can still feel you in me,” todd murmured, squeezing himself, squeezing his legs together.

“i can always feel you,” said fenn. 

“there you are,” paul said.

“huh, oh, yes,” fenn turned to him.

“those are the party people,” said paul. “they’re just streaming in. things won’t really start till around ten, though.

“i wondered what happened to you,” paul was in a snug polo and khakis. “you left during the rehearsal, and then when todd went to check on you he didn’t come back for a long time.”

“well,” fenn said. “todd just….” fenn smirked.

Paul smiled, looking confused and said, “what?”

“todd, felt… inspired, by whatever he saw when i left. He came to… express his inspiration.”

“oh,” paul turned away, going red. “oh, i see.”

“he expressed it very well, i have to admit,” said fenn.

“that is hot.”

“what?” said fenn.

“what you just told me. i mean, how you all did that. That is so hot. i…”

“it’s just sex. it’s your job.”

“but, see… that’s it. it’s my job. i mean, i have actually never… well,” paul began to explain, rolling his hand in a slow circle.

“i’ve never really made love to anyone. You know. The closest i’ve been to that is in a movie, where it’s supposed to be romantic. Then you’re really free to be into each other. But usually in stuff like this it really is kind of mechanical. Not bad, necessarily but… romance. I mean, the two of you. you and todd. And you just did it here.”

“hundreds of people do it here,” fenn said. “i’m guessing hundreds of people do it here in a single week.”

“hundreds of people fuck for a pay check here. Sometimes you like it. sometimes you really want to do it. for whatever reasons. Sometimes you really need to make a paycheck.

“and then, sometimes, at the parties, you really need to get fucked. But half the time, either situation, you’re high out of your mind.”

Fenn said nothing, and after a moment, paul said, “that’s what i like about you. but… that’s what’s strange about you. i can’t tell what you’re thinking. I mean, you don’t judge.”

“i already told you i don’t judge. It gets in the way of great stories. Plus, i’m an actor and i don’t think you’re any good unless you can pay attention to real people, what they do, how they move. Why they do things. And you can’t get that if you’re spending all of your time trying to judge everyone and second guess them.”

“i was an actor.”

“i know. You said that. And… actually,” fenn grinned, “when you all were shooting that movie, you were the only one that was any good. I mean, up until the sex.”

“yeah,” paul said. “then we were all good. I guess.”

“i wouldn’t know,” fenn said. “i mean… i couldn’t watch. I just felt… isn’t it the strangest? I never turn away for anything. But i felt like if i saw it i would be… intruding on something.”

“if you wanna know the truth,” paul told him, “i’m glad you left.”

Fenn looked at him.

“i don’t know. I just feel like… we’re friends or something. Todd’s the filmmaker so it’s different, i suppose. But you know, like i told you. i’ve never had an intimate experience with someone i felt close to. i don’t really know if i could have sex with someone i felt close to, or around someone. I think i can make those movies because no one i actually care about is going to see them. If it was my mother, then… oh, god. i don’t even want to think about it.”

“how did you get here? I mean here, in the midwest?”

“well, guy is here, of course,” paul said. “he gets a lot of folks from chicago, or from indy. Cincinnati. he’s the big porn daddy of the midwest because,” he faked an accent, “even cornfed faggots need to see some dick.

“but, i come from here. You ever heard of east carmel?”

“it’s not far from us.”

“no. well, that’s where my folks are from. I went to school there and everything, and then i went out to california and i thought i’d be a really big star, but… you don’t want to hear all this.”

“i do want to hear it. that’s why i asked.”

“well,” paul said, “i went out to be this big star. I mean, i was going to be a big serious star. I’m not like a lot of guys here. They’re all muscles and pretty. Like noah. Noah is pretty and burt is muscle. I thought i would do serious theatre,” he faked a british accent.  “and maybe through serious theatre find a serious director. Then i would be the next… someone. You know, really big, win an oscar for some deeply soulful movie.”

Fenn smiled.

“and of course i was straight back then. I’d slept with a couple of girls, so i was straight enough. But out in la i started going to clubs, sort of finding myself. And of course where there are actors there are homos and where there are broke actors porn is an option. You really want to hear all of this?”

“if you really want to tell it, i really want to hear it.”

“all right,” paul said. “well, then, i didn’t start out doing porn. I started out stripping. Someone said i could be a good stripper. I had an innocent face, and people would go for that. I didn’t know what the fuck i was doing, but i knew that i could get paid. So i said yes to it.

“i was making a lot more money stripping than acting, and you know how it is with any job. if you want to do what you love. You choose between the job and your… art. or whatever. And the job wins out. so i thought, well, hell, i’ll just strip for awhile and go back to acting.

“but when you strip there is always someone—especially in some rich and closeted la scene—who will tell you, if you do … whatever…. You can make some money. You know,” paul said, when he realized he needed to be clearer, “blow jobs. Giving them, letting people give them to you. being an escort. It starts out small. You think, shit, a thousand dollars just to let this miserable fuck go down on me. and out where i was, out in la with no family or no real friends and rent up the ass, and… i’d forgotten why i came there, it was like, well, okay. Just do it. just do it this once. So i was an escort, which is sort of like a high level dealer in light prostitution.”

“and then the movies?”

“the movies!” paul said. “well, wait. Okay, see, i was still pretty stupid, and one of my… clients i guess you call him, told me about movie auditions. I went. The director told me to strip to my underwear and masturbate. So, then, i knew what it as all about. But i was also getting a check for five hundred dollars and this was better than having to service a real person. So i did it. he hired me and we began making classics at old eagle studio. We started making the good shit. That’s how johnny mellow was born. Johnny’s Big weekend, where he goes to an island and discovers he is gay by screwing about thirty different guys. A huge orgy montage. And of course Pizza slut. but…” paul said anticipating fenn’s question, “the truth is you get used to it. it is sex. it does feel good. It’s risky and wrong and that feels better. Like you’re really sticking it in someone’s eye.

“also, having sex with hot guys who you sort of suspect are more or less in the same place you are, have been down the same roads, is a lot better than what you experience as an escort—which is the only sex i ever knew. Except for, in the way back past, two girls back here. And a lot of times you really want to be… appreciated. So, it makes you feel like that. If you’re with all these hot guys you must be hot too. like, tonight, i’m going to feel really, really hot. tonight at least.

“last night…” said fenn.

“hum?”

“when todd brought you home…”

“i was feeling hot,” paul said, with a raised finger. Then he lowered it, grinned widely under his long nose and said, “until i wasn’t.

There will be a hiatus from rossford for a few days while i post a short story and then we will return with chapter three.