The Christmas Surprise

I get to the pub early ordering a drink as I just sit there waiting for Jack with no idea what to expect about what he wants to talk about.

Sitting there, I see a few familiar faces that thankfully don’t fully recognise me after all this time because I’m not really in the mood to have a lot of these conversations. Waiting for Jack, I look at my watch and see that it’s 6:30 when he told me we’d meet at about 6ish.

As I’m sitting there waiting a voice from behind me startles me and I instantly recognise it “Blake? That surely can’t be you?” I turn around and see a smiling face and I smile back as I see one of my old high school best friends Ryan who I lost touch with over time.

“Holy shit Ryan, it’s been way too long” I say stunned at seeing him but even more so that he’s now in a wheelchair permanently. “So much has changed hey, I mean you got that job in America and moved over there and well I got this new friend” he says chuckling as I knew that he got into a serious accident but never realised that it had left him in a wheelchair.

“I never realised that it ended up so badly, Bec told me about the accident but not that it left you paralysed” I say worried that I hadn’t really sent him a message or anything and that I hadn’t really thought about him since the accident.

Ryan just smiles at me “It’s all ok man, we both lost touch and you weren’t to know about it all because we kept it pretty quiet for the main thing” he says as he tells me not to worry because the whole situation has given him a new look on life and that he now does motiviational speaking to prove to people that any challenge could be overcome like he did with his accident.

Chatting with Ryan is good fun for about 10 minutes and it’s nice to reconnect after so long and we make plans to catch up properly when we both get a chance because he has a pretty tight schedule leading up to Christmas.

Sitting there after talking to Ryan, I check my phone to see if there is any sort of contact from Jack at the moment because it’s getting closer to 7pm without anything as I check my phone and see that he texted me. “Hey, sorry I’m running late got caught at the gym and then another argument with Mum, OMW”

I sigh as I’m just sitting there waiting and wishing that he could have let me know sooner although I’ve managed to fill the time watching some cricket and then chatting to Ryan. It’s just after 7:00 when I notice Jack walking through the doors as I wave over to him. “Sorry bro, I was trying to get here sooner but Mum was in a mood about things again because I got my uni results back today and I managed 3 HD’S and then another distinction on top of that” he says as for anyone those marks are celebration worthy but with Jack at the moment, my parents are making an issue of it.

It's not the fact that they think that his marks should be higher because they don’t, it’s just that with him getting those marks they keep thinking that by him taking time off he is going to waste everything that he’s done so far but knowing Jack he definitely won’t.

“It’s all good bro, I totally get it” I say as I hug him and can just feel the stress that he has at the moment as we order some drinks and order some dinner. I really don’t know how to start the conversation with him at the moment because I don’t want to be the one adding to the stress and sound like I’m judging him because I’m not and I just want my little brother to be happy.

We sit in awkward silence for a minute as I look at him “So what is going on with my little bro?” I ask as I decide to just let him take control of everything in the conversation and then he can tell me as much or as little that is going on and what he is comfortable with.

“There’s not a lot really you know, finished uni for the year and got my marks bac and well you probably know the rest from Mum and Bec” he says sighing as I get the sense that he is frustrated about everything in his life at the moment and not getting any support which is what he needs right now.

“You tell me what’s going on then Jack, I can hear what is happening and going on from Mum or Bec but that’s what they think and really I don’t care about their opinions but I do care about you and how you are feeling” I tell him as he nods getting and appreciating that I’m not judging him.

Jack smiles and looks at me “Basically, I just need a break from uni and everything you know, it’s just been non-stop from school to uni and then onto work and with COVID, I never got a break and it was all just study and work  and then having Mum and Dad pushing me to just get to the same sort of level or beyond that you did” he says as I nod knowing the pressure that’s been put on him.

“I put in an application to defer because all that I was doing was just uni and work plus the gym when I got the chance which wasn’t as often as I liked, so I ended up having to say that I was working or at the library studying to get the workout in” as he talks to me about everything that is happening right now, my thoughts of Jack potentially wanting to be a different person to the one that my parents expect are true.

“I get it bro, just want something a lot more chilled like when I moved out and you’d come down and stay with me right?” Jack nods as we just sit there chatting for a bit longer.

Sitting there, I get an idea “When I go down to the city, come stay with me for a while, it will give Mum and Dad some space which they need but then most importantly it will give you a break and can do whatever you want” I tell him as he smiles and fist bumps me keen on the idea.

Looking at him, I have a cheeky smile on my face as I look at him eating “Plus you can bring him as many guys that you want” I say smiling before going back to my burger.

Jack sits there mouth open, not sure what to say as I just smile at him “Could tell the other night but didn’t want to say anything in front of anyone else but it’s your thing to tell everyone when and where that you want to.” There isn’t much that Jack can say right now as I don’t think he expected me to know his secret.

“How?... Did Corey say something?” he says as I look at him strangely wondering what Corey has to do with anything in this situation. “What do you mean about Corey?” I’m still totally confused about what he could have meant and how Corey could have anything to do with Jack.

“Oh nothing, we just stayed in contact because we hung around in the same sort of circles you know, just with his property stuff and then my uni connections” he says as I’m still not convinced by his explanation and why they would be talking although Bec still follows and occasionally messages him even though everything had happened between us.

I sit there finishing my burger off as Jack still wants to know how I managed to know about his secret that he thought he was hiding so well “Nothing more than just instinct bro, I knew that you’ve never had a girlfriend and just got that sense when I saw you and everything like that from your Instagram postings” I tell him as he just nods.

Jack just sits there and lets out a massive sigh and I can see a lot of the stress that’s built up inside his body just flying away right now. “It sounds stupid I know, but even with you I didn’t know what to say” nodding my head totally getting what he means because it’s the same reason I’ve never told my family about me or anything to do with my relationship with Corey.

“Doesn’t sound stupid bro, I know exactly what you mean, it’s easy to tell random strangers and friends but the closest ones to you, makes you scared to tell them because you worry that you are going to lose everybody” Jack nods at me because we are totally on the same page about things and how we feel.

Sitting and just talking with Jack is fun and seeing him open up is quite refreshing that there is a different person to the quiet and nerdy Jack that used to focus on his marks and schoolwork all the time as well as not just obsessing with trying to please my parents.

“So what are your major plans for next year” I ask Jack as he obviously has some big plans because even for him there would be something in the works because even for this new Jack, there would always be a plan.

Sitting there, Jack smiles at me “Well I got offered a modelling contract, so I thought that I would take that opportunity up because it’s the most amazing offer and before you worry, it’s totally legit” he says as excitedly as I’ve ever seen him. It’s weird though hearing Jack say that he would take up modelling because if you asked anybody about our family and which kid would become a model, nobody would ever guess Jack for sure.

“I’m excited to see how it goes for you bro but just make sure that you’re not getting yourself into porn” Jack just laughs and shrugs his shoulders at me.

“So what if it is porn bro? Can make some good money off it man and ot be honest why not hey, I am an adult after all” he laughs and shrgus not really caring if he does want to do porn or not but I know Mum and Dad would freak out massively knowing that’s what he is doing.

We have another drink, all non-alcoholic of course because both of us drove here and so we don’t want to do anything that gets us into troyble. “So can I ask you something Blake?” Jack says to me as I’m all ears to hear my brothers question and then talk to him about absolutely anything.

“Of course bro, everything is an open book so I’m going to answer it, though maybe not every little detail especially that you know a lot more details of what I like to get up to than what a little bro should know about his big bro” I tell him as he just laughs and raises his eyebrows.

Sitting there, Jack is trying to start his question without touching a risky subject which is hard work because it’s hard to know what is risky. I sit there laughing and just look at Jack as I put my drink down “Just ask me anything bro, I’m not going to be offended, I said that”.

Jack nods at me “I know bro but I don’t want to sound like a total creep, but I mean I suppose I’m just curious about well everything like when did you know and all that” he asks as I was actually thinking about asking the same question of Jack but felt weird about doing so.

“Suppose it’s probably like your situation, you just sort of always know that you’re into guys and the attraction is that obvious that you know you’re not into women” I tell him as he nods getting what I mean about how you just know. “It was always tough to keep it a secret you know, I mean having to cover up when I’m watching porn or before moving out trying to cover when you were out fucking or looking for a hook-up” Jack smirks at me and I know that he wants more information about my hookups.

I shake my head at him “I’ll tell you anything but you totally have to tell me everything about you but not here” Jack looks disappointed but agrees because talking about sex secrets in public probably isn’t the best idea when you don’t know who is listening around the place. That situation has happened to me before although not sex wise but been close because I was talking to Sophie one night about things with a guy that I was into and sort of seeing but complaining about some little things about him and without realising that he was in the bar at the same time.

Jack and I finish dinner and start to get ready to go home and I know that Jack is reluctant to leave and head home because of all the stress that is there at home when he walks straight through that door because there’s a strong chance that the argument is going to flare up again.

“Look bro, I know you don’t want to go home, but just handle the next few days and then you can come stay with me for as long as I’m here” I tell him as he nods reluctantly and hugs me before we head our different ways.

Driving home, I still somehow manage to get lost driving through the suburbs because everything looks alike and I have no idea about the new area before finally getting the right street and pulling up outside Bec’s hosuse.

Wandering back into her place, she and Jase are sitting on the couch watching a movie together cuddled up with Ava actually settled tonight so I just leave them in peace telling her to stay so that they can have some rare couples time.

Opening my laptop, I play around on the internet when my Skype starts to go off with a video call and Sophie is on the other end which shocks me given the time difference and that it’s probably like 5am back there.

“Hey you, wasn’t expecting you to be up that early” I say as she nods and just smiles “I’ve just got home because I got a temporary promotion to be floor manager slash producer for the Spencer Johnson show” I smile hearing that because this is the avenue that she has always wanted to go down eventually but never expected the shift to happen right now.

“Anyways, enough about me, how’s your trip going? Seen your ex yet?” she asks as I realise that she probably doesn’t know how good of a person that Corey actually is given that I’ve only ever bad mouthed him to Sophie.

“Yep, we saw each other last night and it was really good because it just felt like old times where we were back being best friends and especially now that he’s back single” I say as Sophie has the same look on her face as Bec did when I told her.

“Sure that is such a good idea? I mean I know that you said that things were complicated for him and that he explained it but the things you said, you don’t want it all to happen again” I nod as I just tell her that Bec has already warned me about everything and that I was stopping myself from getting attached again.

“But really, I was probably just way too bitter about him because I mean I always knew that was a big chance of happening you know and then when it did was just hurt but I was tough and you probably copped the worst of him” I say as Sophie nods still not convinced about what I had to say and get the sense of her disapproval.

Changing topics, I can tell Sophie still isn’t happy “So what else have you been up to?” she asks me as I tell her that not much is happening here yet. “Well I went out to lunch with my sister and Mum which was fine with the usual questions that weren’t fun but it was ok and she enjoyed the surprise although I did get in trouble for bothering Bec by staying here and then tonight was just catching up with Jack.”

“How was that? You said in the chat last night that he had some stuff to talk about” she says as I nod talking to her not knowing that Bec is standing in the hall and can hear me right now.

“Yeah, was a good little catch up because I think that Jack is really struggling at the moment with all the pressures that Mum and Dad are putting on him both because he’s the last one of us still at home and that they see him ore as the nerdy one out of everyone” I say as Sophie nods and rolls her eyes totally getting what the issue is going to be.

“He’s just totally over everything because he wants to live a different life because everything for him has been either just school, uni or then going to work and he’s had to resort to lying to them about heading to the gym and then the tattoos are a big deal of their own now that they cover both arms and his pecs” Sophie’s eyes go big because she’s the pictures on my shelf of my family and Jack growing up looking as if he’d be the last to cover his body in tatts.

“Wow, that wouldn’t of gone down well with anyone, so how are you dealing with things for him as in just trying to help give him a break” she as I start to tell her my plans.

I think about what I want to do and tell Sophie “Well I told him that he should come and stay with me when I head down to the city for the few weeks, it just gives everyone space and he can go out without judgment like when we would fake his age to head out mainly down to the pub.”

Sophie looks at me stunned that I of all people would encourage Jack to essentially break the law by faking his age because she always jokes that I probably have the most risk aversion of anybody that she knows and she’s probably right.

“Yeah, when I moved out and closer to the city, Jack would often come down and stay which just gave my parents some space so that they could head away and I could keep my eye on Jack for them and we would go out to the club or down to the Goldmark Hotel” thinking about it, I should have realised about Jack being gay because despite it not being a specific gay pub, it was a common spot for both your usual straight tradies after work but it was also a popular spot for members of the LGBT community to hang out as well.

Sitting there thinking about things and explaining my plan with Sophie, she thinks that it’s a great idea and the change in space is probably good for everyone because it might let my parents realise how Jack is feeling about everything but then could also give Jack an idea of what he wants to do going forward.

“Yeah, well that was what my thinking was and as I told him that it lets him go out whenever he wants and that he can feel like he doesn’t need to be something that he’s not, because he just doesn’t need to act for me” I say as Sophie nods and reassures me this is the best idea.

Logging off, Sophie tells me that she needs to go to bed because she’s been awake for close enough to 24 hours which I couldn’t imagine as she logs off and I fall back on the bed still not realising that Bec listened to it all.

“Jack’s gay isn’t he?” Bec says to me as I look across at her kind of annoyed that she was standing there listening to me. “Were you standing out there listening to me talk to Sophie?” I ask rather bluntly as she shakes her head at me.

“Of course not Blake, I went into check on Ava because she was crying and I could hear everything that you were saying” she says as she sits on the bed and I nod. “Yeah, but make sure that he doesn’t know because he is really struggling at the moment with just about everything and I know that the decisions aren’t popular with anyone but he wants to do it and that’s all that matters.

Bec gives me a reluctant nod “Yeah of course, but I guess that I didn’t really know that things were that bad for him like I knew Mum and Dad were putting the pressure on but I didn’t think he was that close to breaking point” she says as I nod as we try to work out how to deal with this.

“You cannot tell Jack that you know any of this because I promised that anything that I told him would stay just between us and like I told you I was keeping his trust” she nods and has a smile on her face as I stay that. “With all due respect, you never told me anything I just deduced what I had already suspected I guess” she says as I just shake my head and laugh.

“Ok yeah true” Bec gets up and starts to wander away as I’m still thinking about how Jack referenced Corey when asking if he had told me anything about him. “Hey, one more thing?” I say to her as she turns back.

“Do you know anything about Jack and Corey being friends? Because when I mentioned about him being gay he goes to me about Corey telling me and then he was awkward when I asked about why Corey would say anything?”

As I ask Bec, she shakes her head as I have no idea what their connection could be and nor does she “No idea, I didn’t even know they were friends you know, I suppose with Jack doing work with that property group on his work experience then they could just be connected that way” she says as I nod and leave it for the time being although I don’t know what to think about this whole situation at the moment