Sequel to See Me Emo, See No Evil
Mark and I have been together for three weeks now and I as I flip my freshly dyed purple bangs from my eyes I drive up in my black convertible up to a house I'm not sure I want to go into. I guess Mark could tell that I was nervous from the expression on my face that I hadn't realized I was even making.
'Babe, it's okay calm down.' He said
'Hmm what makes you think I'm not calm...? I'm totally fine.' I said this with heavy breathing and a slight stutter. I never stutter. I knew I was lying because I was only trying to convince myself.
Mark gave me one of those smiles; he could have healed a wound with that smile of his, and instantly I felt better.
'Now come on' he said
He grabbed my hand and leaned over and kissed me sweetly on the lips. He then reached over my body and opened the door. We simultaneously climbed out and met up at the trunk of the car. I was wearing a slim black sports jacket over a Zoo York designed purple T-shirt with black skinny jeans, limited edition purple converse, with the accessory of purple chains hanging from a matching belt at my waist, and I also happened to be wearing a tie.
Mark was busy fixing me up and tugging on my tie. It was the middle of October and I watched the cold atmosphere leak from our mouths. Mark was wearing a fabulous ensemble, a thin pink collared shirt over a long sleeve green thermal-weave shirt. He had on green skinny jeans, a bright pink belt with green skater shoes and like three spiked bracelets on both arms to match. His outfit matched his hair this time and he even painted his nails to match, one hand green and the other pink; mine were black except for my purple thumbs.
That's when I noticed he was just as nervous as I was; he was excessively worrying about the non-existent glitches in his outfit. He was greatly focused on the lint on his shirt and pants and the very sound that came from the chains on my belt, he kept trying to make them stay still.
I grabbed him by his shoulders and gently pulled him up and kissed him on his forehead. I brushed his hair from his eyes and stared into them, our heads fell against each other as we took that moment to become lost within our eyes.
'It's okay, okay? Calm down' I said.
He grinned. 'Ha now you're telling me to calm down... I'm just nervous about you meeting them I haven't even seen them in nine months, this could be awkward.'
I laughed, kind of loud for it to be 9:52 at
'Are your parents' awkward people?'
'Yes they are, they're awkward around me sometimes and I'm their child.'
We both laughed that time. And mark hugged me like we were going into battle. I guess he got the same sense because when he pulled away from me he said,
'Be strong soldier, make me proud!'
We laughed even louder. I grabbed his hand and we began walking to the steps, it was 7:58 and we were on time.
We made it on the porch and even though I was freezing my ass off I was reluctant to enter. I despised awkwardness. Mark slowly lifted his arm and knocked on the door and about thirty seconds later a man and a woman, opened the door and allowed us to enter. The man was fairly good looking with salt and pepper hair on his face but jet black hair on his head, you could tell he died it but it didn't look... cheesy. He was a nice shape with no gut, for some reason I expected him to have one, and he was about forty five years old and wore a stripped dress shirt and black slacks.
The woman had bright red hair that was straightened down to her back. She wore a green evening gown with a low cut back and it rippled in the front, it went well with her pale complexion and her green eyes. It was then that I looked at Marks hair and wondered what the hell the real color of his hair was, he never told me and I haven't seen it.
The four of us, awkwardly, stood there and starred at each other, Mark's mother with an elegant smile whilst his father stood there completely inattentive.
'Mom, Dad... this is Blake...'
'Oh but my friends call me Talon.' I said
reaching in for a hand shake.
'We're Marks parents of course; I'm Jared and this is Stephanie.' He motioned his hand toward the woman in green.
'Hi how are you?' she asked
I could tell she was a really kind person, nurturing.
'I'm fine thank you.' I replied.
And I gave them the bottle of wine I was holding. We all headed
towards the dining room for what they called 'supper' I always thought it weird to call dinner that.
Their house was outstanding, high ceilings, a couch that was as long as the living room itself. The television was gigantic and hung on the wall while everything in the room seemed to surround it like some sort of shrine.
The dining room table was a lengthened rectangle stretched in its own room. It was the biggest dining room I had ever been in. When we walked in the walls were painted an auburn color and the table was littered by several kinds of foods and dishes. A chandelier dangled from the sky of the room. The chairs were even set up, one on each side of the table. Marks parents were to get the two long ends and Mark and I were to get the sides. Stephanie and I both sat but Mark and his father remained standing, making it one of the most awkward moments in my life. I looked at Mark wondering why the fuck he was standing up, then he picked up his chair, lightly, and placed it next to me and sat down. His father just had this look on his face. I really couldn't tell what of, but it was an intense expression and it was directed at me. Scratch what I said earlier, this is one of the most awkward moments I've had in my life, his glance lasted as long as five minutes.
Everything was there except for the plates for us to eat on, which I thought peculiar. Then I realized why when Marks father asked me to come with him to the kitchen to help with plates. He obviously wanted to talk to me.
Damn. I thought, I'm already nervous as hell and now I'm going to have to endure a one on one with the dad. I squeezed Mark's hand and he rubbed my back before I got up, reassuring me. As I was leaving he strikes up a conversation with his mother. We entered the vast kitchen and Jared grabbed the plates from one of, the cabinets, handing me two.
His intensity increased and he was focused on me.
'Thank you' he said.
I jumped at his sudden movement, then looked around to see if anybody had appeared behind me because he couldn't have been talking to me. 'I'm sorry wah? I could have sworn you just said thank you.'
'I did, I want to say thank you for staying at my son's side even though he's done so much and there has been so much he's been through.'
I looked around the room again completely caught off guard. 'Umm, am I being punked or are you messing with me because the shit is working.'
Jared laughed for the first time and he smiled. He had one of those smiles too. He enveloped his arms around me, he smelled good.
We went back to the table and said grace, then we began eating and chatting and having a really good time. The awkwardness was gone; we managed to escape it through the dinner of all dinners and the food was immaculate.
Even though we were having a really good time, in the back of my head I couldn't help but ponder what Jared had been talking about exactly. I knew Mark had a shady past but I think I need to know what it is. I know I said I didn't care but now it seems it's a bit more serious than I imagined. I mean first there was the gun in his bedside drawer and now his father tells me he's done things and been through a lot. Apparently, Mark is afraid for me to know. I glanced over to look at Mark who was having the time of his life, and he was afraid he had lost that connection with his parents. It was still there.
He looked back at me and grabbed my hand and our fingers entwined. My next thought was:
I think I might love him.
It was almost midnight when we left his parents house and began walking to the car.
'I love your parents. They are pretty damn awesome.'
'Ha-ha, yeah I know.' He replied.
He turned to look at the house and screamed 'I love you guys!' then he swung his arm toward the house, gesturing to it. It was funny because you heard a muffled 'We love you too!' and saw his parents waving in the window. Mark then blew them kisses as we got in the car. He was driving this time.
On the drive home it was quiet, we weren't really talking but it was a comfortable silence.
Then Mark finally said something.
'So you had a good time?'
'Actually I had a great time, you seemed like you were enjoying it.'
He looked at the road for a second and then glanced at me as if he were going to say something but then said something else. He has done this before but this time I knew what he was going to say.
'Yeah, I had a pretty good time, I'm just glad it wasn't wha-'
I cut him off.
'You weren't going to say that just now.'
He raised his eyebrow 'What? What are you talking about?'
He had this grin on his face, as did I, I got closer to him.
'You want to know what your dad said to me in the kitchen.'
He laughed. 'How the hell did you know that?'
I laughed back. 'Hmm maybe it's because you're predictable or maybe I just know you.'
His smile disappeared suddenly and he turned to me with some expression I didn't really like.
'I know for a fact I'm not predictable.'
He shifted his body in the seat, uncomfortably.
'And you don't know me.'
Mark is rarely serious, and I liked him that way, I especially missed his joking self now, because he's a different person when he's serious. But maybe he's right. I don't know him.
We pulled up to the house and I was hesitant to get out of the car and he noticed it.
'Oh shit I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get all weird back there.'
I looked at him with a smile I'm not sure was real.
'No it's okay. Maybe I don't know you at all.'
He grabbed my arm and kissed me on the cheek.
'Please Blake I'm sorry... really.'
He always called me Blake when he was serious and when he meant what he was saying; he knew I realized this a long time ago.
I grinned at him again, a grin that was more real than the last. I got out of the car and waited for him to make it around the car and he grabbed my hand.
As we walked up the steps to our apartment I couldn't stop thinking about who Mark really is or was, I'd do anything for him and would tell him anything he would want to know. But for some reason he doesn't ask too many questions about me. I think it's because he doesn't want me to ask him questions about his past but the difference is that as fucked up as my life has been I'm not afraid to tell anyone about it, especially not him. And he should feel the same way.
We have been sitting in the apartment, both unable to sleep. Him in his black and green boxers and me in my purple boxer briefs. We lay in bed, his arms around me. I thought to myself, if I don't do something now I' never will. I turned around and we were face to face a little more than two inches away from each other.
'Mark, why don't you ever ask things about me, I mean like about my parents or if I have siblings or anything?'
He smiled slightly. 'Because I don't know how sensitive you are to these things. What if I lose you because I asked you something that really wasn't any of my business or because I said something that pissed you off to where you didn't want to see me? I don't think I could keep myself on a good path if you weren't in my life.'
He sounded strong and meaningful. He gripped my body tighter into him. He eyes were watery and it was as if I could see what he was thinking, his thoughts of what it would be like if I weren't here for him and his worried expression told me that he wish he could tell me things but he's not sure he can, he doesn't want our relationship to be secrets and unanswered questions, and I thought this as good as time as any.
'My parents were the best in the world.'
He looked up at me and met my eyes. I got lost in his for a few seconds. I just let myself dig into his pupils as I brushed his hair out of his eyes with my hand.
'My mother was sweet and kind and my father was brave and strong but the dearest guy you could ever meet. As sweet and precious as they were, they were struggling. We had this crappy apartment and an even crappier car, our money was running lower by the second and neither my mom nor dad could get a good job. My mom had been in jail for attacking her boss who completely drove her over the edge. We laughed about that a million times but she spent two years in jail and it was just me and my dad for a while. My father grew sick while she was gone and couldn't really take care of his self as well as you or I could. I felt horrible. I felt like it was my fault because I couldn't do anything to fix it, which made perfect sense then. He went to the hospital and everything and could have gotten an operation but it was a 52,000 dollar procedure and we didn't have our 550 dollar rent. So I started saving up my change and hustling kids at school. I was about 11 years old then and I had something to work for but as much as I saved I wasn't even close to 52 thousand.'
I laughed to myself and brought my eyes back to Marks who stared at me as if watching a movie. He was intent on my words.
'I managed to save 10,000 dollars and I was proud of my self. I had it all in my hands and this huge wad of money. So one day I go to my parent's room and they are surprisingly happy, not that fake happy that they use to try to keep my head up. It was genuine happiness. It was in the air. Then I noticed that they had these huge stacks of money piled on the bed. I was like 'WHOA where'd all this come from?!' I jumped on the bed and it was a beautiful day that day. They said they came into a new business with some close friends. I showed them my money and they told me to keep it and we were going to get my dad's operation. Everything was going great, we had money, we had fun, and my life was fantastic. Then there was that day when I saw it.'
Mark's expression was intent and quizzical. 'What did you see?'
I laughed again but with more staleness. 'My parents, my sweet parents, my great parents had three briefcases full of marijuana and heroine and almost every drug you could think of, piled in those cases.
Marks face went blank for a few seconds. I rubbed his leg smoothly with my hand. I knew he had a past involving such things.
I was fourteen then and it was then it all made sense to me. I cried in my room for two days straight. I didn't want drug money; it was in my clothes, my belongings. I felt horrible but I wouldn't tell my parents why I was so upset. Though maybe if I had, it wouldn't have happened.
We were coming back from the State Fair; I had a new stuffed animal that I adored. It was a blue and purple porcupine, and even though I was fourteen I still loved stuffed animals. My dad was driving and eating popcorn while my mom was basking in her own little world, glaring out the window with a pleasant expression on her face. We had been happy for a while but I did noticed they seemed a bit more stressed than usual as if they were in trouble and this is the only time I've seen them have a good time in a couple weeks. I was comfortable and satisfied so I thought I'd just ask. I just blurted out 'Are you guys'... drug dealers? I'm just wondering.'
They both stopped, dad even stopped the car and they answered with a simultaneous 'WHAT?!'
I looked at them both. 'Ha, I knew it. I knew it a long time ago.'
That's when this blast came out of nowhere and a hole formed in the windshield. The stormy air outside began to manifest into a monsoon of rain causing the water and cool air to seep into the car. All three of us, bewildered, got out of the car and looked around and in the distance this hooded figure was standing in front of this yellow tinted car, blocking the road. If I wasn't so freaked I would have commented on how disgustingly ugly it was. I could tell my mother knew what this was about. She grabbed me and told me to run into the alley and not to look back. I acted confused but I knew what this was about. So I ran hard and slid on the flooded concrete. I watched behind the wall and saw the man walk up to my parents with a long silver gun. I could describe everything about what happened but for some reason I can't tell you what he looked like, his image is fuzzy, I can't really see him in my head. My father ran headstrong at the man and was shot point black in the head and my mother screamed to match the horror and the very sound of the bullet. My father, the strongest man in the world to me lay on the cold floor, a mass on a red watery puddle. In anger my mom attacked the man and was grabbed but not before she scratched him deep on his face, enough to leave a scar. She was shot too, up close in the stomach and then he let her fall to the ground right on top of my father. He got into OUR car and drove past them.'
By this time I had hot tears running down my face, I hadn't even realized I was crying and Mark was holding me the tightest he ever had before.
'You don't have to tell me anymore.' He said.
'It's okay.' I replied
He kissed me on my forehead.
'The only thing I remember about the guy was that he had this hooded jacket on and in big red letters it read 'TALON' and underneath the letters was this claw that was supposed to be ripping through the shirt. The image of it was burned into my brain while the rest of the man faded from my mind.'
We embraced each other and I dug my head into his chest. I felt suspended in time.
He looked up. 'Tell me what happened, I want to know what happened that made you so... lost'
'Um, yeah' he cleared his throat.
He began to speak when you heard this loud crash, glass breaking downstairs. We both rose up from the bed and I grabbed his arm and he hugged me back. We heard a bunch of moving around and then saw a flash of light fly up the stairs and enter the hallway. It was from a flashlight. Mark got up and put his finger to his mouth, signaling me to be silent. He told me to stay there and grabbed the doorknob with cautiousness. You could tell he was trying to be brave and I got out of the bed and stood behind him. I put my hand on top of his and eased the door open. He turned to me and smiled. I started down the steps first and he followed. I was almost at the end of the stairs when the flash came to my left and I ducked to the ground. Mark lunged at it; it was a guy with this huge metal bat. And Mark managed to get him to let it go and then punched him out cold. He looked up at me and smiled hugely, proudly. These arms appeared out of the dark and hung around Marks neck, there was another guy. I took a step forward to help Mark when something cold pressed to my back. I put my hands up; a third guy and he had a fucking knife. In the very back of my mind I thought to myself: these mother fuckers must be broke or cheap or something, they don't even have a fucking gun.
I managed to speak. 'Son of a bitch'
'Why are you fucks in our house?'
He made this stupid laugh, a chuckle of some sort that sounded more like a chainsaw that was low on power.
'We want your boyfriend.' He said
I looked up at Mark who was being restrained by his neck. I had a good idea on what this was all about.
'Aw, fuck you Mark!' I said giving Mark a wink.
'No babe, fuck you!' he replied
The guy with the knife to my back pulled my back to his chest and placed the chilly knife to my throat. I've never been in a situation like this but ever since my parents died, I prepared for it. I was ready for some bull shit like this to happen. The cold knife pressed itself up to my jugular.
'Fuck you both!' the guy said, announcing his maniacal laughter. I hated the sound of it. Mark now started turning red, he was being strangled. His blood filled his face and it looked as if he was burning, his eyes began to roll backward and you could tell he was In pain but he had a grin on his face, he knew I was going to do something and that I wouldn't just let this happen. I'm too much of a relentless person to let shit like this just happen and I care about him too much to let anything happen to him.
I began to laugh. 'Like he said, no babe, fuck you.'
I grabbed the hand with the knife in it and outstretched it in front of me, I turned it quickly and lifted it above my shoulder and slammed it down as hard as possible. I snapped it like a twig. As a result the bastard lay on the ground with his arm bleeding. I took the knife and pointed it at the guy upholding my boyfriend he let him go with certain intensity and slowly walked towards the door. I told him to stop, raised the knife and bashed the end of it at the back of his head knocking him unconscious and possibly causing much deserved and needed brain injury
I looked around and noticed the third guy was gone. I took a more detailed look around and heard breathing behind me, the guy Mark took out flung himself at me and I stopped him by raising my foot and kicking him in his chest which threw him into the wall. He took a step forward I aimed at him spinning my foot around to strike him in his face.
I ran back to Mark who was staring at me with this strange look on his face. I smiled and he returned the favor.
'Talon, I mean Blake, that was pretty fuckin' bad ass. When did you-?'
'I've known how to fight like that since my parents died; I thought some shit would go down at some point in my life.'
He moved up to me and pressed his lips against mine. He kissed me long and passionately.
'I'd go down on you but I think we should leave before they wake up.'
I agreed and we walked upstairs. It was obvious we had to move out so we packed our things and left the house, going out the back.
'Say it.' I said as we drove down the dark road.
'Say what? What are you talking about?'
'You know what I'm talking about, don't act brand
He laughed. 'Hmm, thank you babe.'
He leaned over and kissed me. I loved his lips like I loved the smile they created.
'No problem. It was... fun.'
'Now you say it.' He said.
'What thank you?' I asked perplexed
'Ha-ha no, now who's acting brand new?'
He gave me his eminent smile and then I knew what he meant.
'Mark' he looked at me.
'Even though you have all these issues and even though you are apparently on someone's hit/shit list for owing drugs or drug money.'
He cut in.
'Yeah, hmm I do have a lot of issues and I'm glad you figured out what was going on because I sure as hell didn't know how to tell you.'
I laughed hard unexpectantly. It was all so funny.
'Hey.... I don't care about those things.' I said candidly
'Well then say it.' He said.
I took a pause. 'I love you.'
He stopped to look at me and threw his pink bangs to the side of his face so I could see his gorgeous eyes.
'I love you too.'
'Now' he said leaning back into the seat, gripping the steering wheel.
'Where the fuck to babe?'
We smiled at each other and I turned on the stereo, we were listening to I Set My Friends on Fire, our favorite metal band.
I remember Mark saying-
He interrupted my thoughts.
'This is my song right here!!' and he turned it up and the car began to gyrate from his passionate head banging.
And I remember him saying just that.