Top #Selfies of the Week: Fuck Yesssss Top #Selfies of the Week: Fuck Yesssss

The lining up of the angles in the top four photos is sort of a coincidence but what isn't a coincidence is the guys have something in common otherwise. I'll give you a hint. It rhymes with stealthy but is not stealthy at all. It's rather exposed actually. At what point will cell phone makers start advertising the camera functionality with nudes? It would be so much more honest.

"Moore's law" is the observation that, over the history of computing hardware, the number of transistors in a dense integrated circuit has doubled approximately every two years." So technological capacity doubles and then that doubles and then that doubles and then I don't want to know. So what's the name of the law that says "Over the history of pornographic hardware, the number of naked men in a dense integrated circuit party has doubled approximately every two years (minus those dead from overdoses)." Maybe it's "Brandon's Law" because there are so many porn models who have been named Brandon.

But really I'm just outraged. How come I never see the ass guy appear when I board an elevator. The doors parting, then his ass cheeks parting. Why can't this happen?

Or why not just a random guy only in his underwear? Is that too much to ask in my elevator ride? Sure, in real life it would be shockingly horrifying and horrifyingly shocking for a naked or semi-naked guy to be on (or get on) my elevator. But I still don't think it's too much to ask. At what point can porn intrude into everyday life? With the advertising that people are cramming into every available square foot (including streaming content on screens in elevators) who among us will advocate for adult-only elevators full of nudity and pornography? It's what Elisha Otis (of Otis Elevator Company) dreamt of when he founded the company in 1853.

Well in the absence of that, consider these pics a view through a pornographic window. But I still want a ride in that elevator.

Tags: (40), (109), (1196),

Bookmark and Share

blog comments powered by Disqus