Something for the Weekend: 18th Century Dildo

Did you go back in time and drop your dildo in the toilet? Because I know if I traveled back to the mid-1700s, I'd definitely accidentally drop my dildo in the toilet so I figure the same could happen to you. It makes perfect sense.

Now what actually has happened is archeologists (who are all perverts) have found a 250-year old dildo in an ancient toilet in Poland.

While the toilet is ancient, at some point the site had likely become a fencing school, as evidenced by swords in the area. So most likely someone took the dildo into the bathroom and dropped it in the toilet. Then went back to fencing class. Thus the joke "How many Polish people does it take to lose a dildo in an ancient toilet?"

The relatively thick and large (and visually disgusting) dildo is about eight long (a real eight inches, not a Grinder eight), and made of leather with a wooden tip. Fancy!

And no, it didn't take any batteries as the battery wasn't invented until 1800 by Alessandro Volta. So the closest one could get to a vibrator before that was shoving a metal dildo up you and standing outside in a thunderstorm. Want to do that this weekend? I know you do.

It was found among pottery and jewelry. Archeologists can't rule out someone tried to stick the pottery and jewelry up themselves but probably not. It's best to wear really classy jewelry while pounding oneself with a dildo. Which is totally what happens at the Tiffany's Christmas party.