Something for the Weekend: Obscenely Gay Undies

Millionaires have a tendency to change outfits multiple times a day. One for breakfast, another for lunch at the country club. Yet another for the symphony. And a final one for a clandestine meeting in a sleazy 4 star hotel bar (sleazy because it's not 5 star hotel) with a potential mistress. Because it takes alcohol to turn one's psychiatrist into one's mistress.

And guys who are one million times gay have a tendency to change underwear multiple times a day. An obscene gay underwear wardrobe is critical for success!

Starting at top let and going clockwise, I mean cockwise:

The blue squarecut is perfect for stripping down to in an apartment building laundry room, because how else can you wash every pair of pants you own at the same time besides walking around in your underwear. Followed by your hunky neighbor discovering you, then needing to wash the squarecuts too a few minutes later and having absolutely nothing to wear.

The lipsticked underwear is perfection if you want to pose as trade. Just say your girlfriend bought the for you. Try to make it believable.

The silver string pouch is exactly what to wear to an important job interview at American Apparel. There's so much sexual harassment going on in that company, you may as well get a head start and expose yourself to harassment while making others uncomfortable with your shiny bulge. Soon you'll be "Most Sexually Harassed Employee of the Month" (as you've always dreamed).

The scoop neck tank and matching black brief is perfect for running for President as a Libertarian. Because that totally looks like nightmare on wheels Rand Paul, from the neck up only.

The mesh top and brief are great to wear to the beach, so you can create a hypnotic tan-line pattern (and cum and pee freely as needed without having to take your underwear off).

The the black, semi-sheer squarecut is perfect for a formal restaurant. Or the horrific buffet at the leather bar (in towns where they have to serve food in order to sell hard liquor). It's just missing a bowtie to really make the look special.

Now Rand Paul is going to need a Vice President so get your underwear wardrobe together. I'm guessing a thong should perfectly express your political views.