Chaturbate with GayDemon: Open Wide

Has staring at some guy's crotch, then looking him straight in the eyes and licking your lips gone completely out of style lately? The odds of getting punched in the face for such a brazen cocksuckerish move (while still intimidating) have never been lower. I don't even see a lot of blatantly hungry crotch watching at my gym, and there are some porn actors who occasionally work out there. And they have crotches with dicks in them and everything!

But no matter what's in style or not, you can always watch the cocks on Chaturbate and open your mouth wide in a combination of anticipation, hope, fantasy and general masturbatory panting.

It's sort of like Lamaze breathing, minus the pregnancy and ice chips. But if you're a gooner masturbator drooler, you might want to swipe a lobster bib next time you're at a seafood place. Or that weird square blue bib at the dentist office. Or just drool all over yourself.

But save some for the next amazing bulge or cock you see, open wide, and beg with your eyes. If you run into trouble, you can claim you were drooling over the guy standing just behind him who has mysteriously disappeared. Just don't try that excuse on an elevator.

By the way, if we all say Chaturbate enough, it will have to be added to the dictionary. The Employment Non-Discrimination Act still hasn't passed in the U.S., but we can make the language as masturbation friendly as possible in the meantime. Then Chaturbate Host will carry as much power on a resumé as CEO. Or as much as CEO of Masturbation.