What the fuck is happenin' to me?! I can't get Matthew out of my brain all the sudden. I hate this; every time I close my eyes, I see his perfect face with that big smile on it. it's driving me insane, and getting me hard! He's got a vice grip on me, and I can't shake it off! I can't stop thinking about him...

I don't know why this is so difficult for me. I'm a guy, he's a guy. We aren't supposed to be together! But, something in my brain wants me to be with Matthew, and it's growing more and more as time goes by. It's so stupid! What do I see in him that makes me want to be with him? Is it his soft brown hair? No... His cute smile? That's not it.... His eyes?

His eyes..... So warm and smooth like chocolate. They are so mysterious. They make you want to stare further and further into them, and he gets me every time. He's got an awesome body too. He's capable of being an athlete with his bod, and I'm almost jealous.

Maybe I'm going at this all wrong... Maybe being gay isn't all bad. What am I saying? Football players can't be gay. Gay people aren't tough enough to play football, so I should just avoid Matthew at all costs. But, that's going to be so hard to do. Walking down the hallway with my arm still tight to my chest, I see him notice me, and he smiled. I instantly froze as he made his way over to me. "Hey..." He said with a smile. "H-hi.... U-Uh... What's up?" I choked. "Nothin'. I was just thinking 'bout something." He said looking at me with his deep brown eyes. "W-what?" I asked. He paused for a second. "N-nothin'. How's your arm?" He asked as I leaned against the wall. "Hurts. My doc prescribed some pain meds, but they make me tired so I'm not takin' 'em." I said rubbing the cast a little bit. "Smart." He replied.

"I guess..." I said leaning against the lockers. "By the way, You still up for hangin' out after school?" I added crossing my arms. "Yeah, all the way." He said with a smile. "Awesome!" I couldn't contain myself. I was just so freaking excited to be hangin' out with him. But... Maybe I am.....

No. It can't be. I can't be. All this is, Is just two guys hanging out and doing stuff guys would do. That's it. I don't have to think about his body, his lips, his handsome face, his eyes....

Dammit! every fucking time.....

He stepped over to the water fountain to get a drink, and as he pushed down on the dispenser, water shot all over his white shirt.

"Aaaah.... Dammit!"he groaned. I saw him reach over to his backpack, and he pulled out another shirt.

He's not going to....

He peeled off the shirt right quick, and I was entranced immediately. His body was amazing. I couldn't stop looking at it. He had those tight washboard abs, perfectly rounded pecs, and just a little bit of hair going down from his belly button into his shorts.

Oh my God..... I felt my pants get a little tighter, so I looked down to notice that there's tent forming.

no, no! I gotta get outta here...

I turned around and walked away. "Where you goin'?" SHIT! "U-uh...." I stammered. God his body is immaculate; I wanna feel it. It must be so soft and warm. I just wanna wrap my arms around him and never let him go. "I...." I added. "Is it 'cause I have no shirt on or somethin'?" He laughed. "I... No. I mean, yeah but... I... I don't know what's wrong with me..." I said totally confused with myself. "Nothin's wrong with you, Kev." He said slipping on a spare shirt, and stepping towards me.

Finally... Please spare me....

"No, I think there is, 'cause you see I'm---" he cut me off by grabbing my head, and pulling me into a kiss. Right there. In front of the ENTIRE school. "You talk WAY too much, Kev." He smiled. "Please.... D-do that again...." I said finally beaten. In just 2 hours, I went from straight, and makin' out with chicks, to kissin' a hot dude. It all makes sense now. When I kissed chicks, it was nothing. I felt nothing, and I didn't want to fuck them either, but I so wanna fuck Matt according to my cock. That's all I can think about. HE'S all I think about. Even in two measly hours, I already want him, and somethin' fierce.

He finally kissed me, and this time, I pulled him in close to me. My eyes closed, and it just feels so right. The feeling of his lips on mine is so awesome. "Kevin's a FAG?!" I heard from the left. My eyes shoot open, and I see Greg standing there. "I can't fuckin' believe it! My captain's a Fuckin' homo!!" I let go of Matt, and turn to face Greg. "It's not what you think---"

"then what the fuck is it?! Bromance?! That wasn't bromance, dude. You were frenchin' with a guy, fag!" He said giving me a shove. "Broken arm or not, I'll still punch your horse-teeth down your motherfuckin' throat, cunt!" I said getting in his face. "Woah! Step off! I don't wanna catch the gay!" He said pushing me hard. I tripped over something, and fell to the ground. "Just leave us alone..." Matt said outta the blue, and pretty brave. "What are you gonna do 'bout it, Emerson?" He said stepping over to him.

Aww HELL NO!! I'll kill him before he hurts Matt!

I got up, and walked up behind him. I tapped him on the shoulder, and he turn around. I punched him right in his face. He went down like a 10 pound bag of potatoes. "don't. Touch. Him!" I growled. He got up not even two seconds later, and got up in my face. "Is he your little boyfriend?" He mocked. "No." I replied. he just laughed. "Yeah right! You were suckin' face with the guy." I didn't know how to reply. Got I hate him so much. Maybe I should just accept the fact that I like dudes. It's not going to change, so I might as well not run away from it anymore. "Come on Matt, lets get the fuck outta here." I said looking over to him. "Don't bother coming to practice tomorrow, Fag!" He yelled as I walked away from them. He's just lucky I didn't punch his face into his fucking stomach! "Kev, violence ain't the answer to everything, y'know." Matt said. "Yeah I think I know that, Matt. He just needed to be taught a lesson."

He was awfully quiet after that, and I was a little nervous for him. "Hey, sorry about the kiss. I-I didn't know what to do. I was just very wrong about you, and I got carried -"

"Don't worry about it." I started as I gave him a half smile. "I know that your straight, But, I just couldn't help myself. I understand if you don't want to be my friend anymore."

I just laughed. "Dude, relax... I... I kinda... Liked it..." I said blushing. "Well, I gotta get to my last class so, I'll see ya after school, Kev." He said with that smile.

"O-ok..." I replied.

God... I hope I don't do anything I'll regret tonight....


Aaron Heights

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