Straight From The Tap

Chapter 1

“The customer is always an asshole.” That’s the phrase that spawned a friendship. I met Keith in the early 90’s in a department store. I sold electronics. He sold luggage just across the aisle. We chatted during down times, complaining about customers and hitting it off immediately. I thought he was cute—bright, hazel eyes that paired well with his shiny brown hair. I noticed his wedding ring early on—never failed, the guys I meshed with were always married. Weeks became months as healthy banter developed and we frequently went to lunch together. It became evident quickly that he wasn’t uptight with gay guys. I hadn’t yet come out to him, or many at that time. One day, I walked down to Waldenbooks in the mall for some “reading material” to take home for later. This was ancient America when one could buy skin magazines in a store next to JCPenney. To obscure the naughty one, I’d always sandwich it between some random movie magazines.

I was still perusing the magazines when I heard “Hey, find anything cool today?” behind me. It was Keith, pleased to have snuck up on me. Remembering I was clutching a magazine full of naked men in my hand, he obviously noticed I had turned red as a stop sign. I figured it was a good a time as any and handed the magazines over and said “well, I think so.” His eyes ticked up at me with a playful gleam. “Oh…I see. I think my brother-in-law reads the same ones.” I was relieved, but still nervous. I knew him well enough at that point it wasn’t going to be an issue. 

Eventually, I was invited to his house one muggy summer night for dinner and to meet his wife, Julia. She was the opposite of what I expected—not unfriendly, but hardly warm and barely carrying a sense of humor. The chemistry between the two was next to nothing, but their marriage was ultimately none of my business. 

After ordering Chinese food, a movie was suggested, and I don’t even recall what it was. I didn’t feel unwelcome, but I was struggling to be at ease. Keith and I maintained our work banter while Julia occasionally produced a detached chuckle. The movie became background noise, and we kept chatting back and forth with beers in our hands. A little while later, Keith signaled he was going to go take a leak.

Julia and I made the best of very small talk until he returned. When he did, I was in for a pleasant surprise. The first thing I saw from the dim hallway was a faint treasure trail leading into his shorts. His shirt was gone. It was the first time I ever saw his chest and it was like time froze for me to examine every inch of it. 

“Sorry, it’s these hot summer nights,” he said, settling back onto the sofa next to his wife. 

Julia wasn’t fazed. “Never mind him. He almost never wears a shirt. I told him to put one on to be polite.” 

I nervously chuckled. “No big deal.” As much as I pretended not to look, I couldn’t help but keep glancing at his lightly furry belly that led up to a small patch of chest hair. I fought to resist sexual thoughts, but my throbbing cock underneath my shorts begged to differ, threatening to burst through my zipper like an Alien chestburster. Leering at his torso again, I thought “if she’s not on him every night, there’s something wrong with her.”

Little did I know, that was the tip of the iceberg. Over the next two years, we hung out a lot more, with and without Julia. He began to trust me more with intimate knowledge, and I became more comfortable with discussing gay guy stuff. 

After just two beers at a Chili’s by the mall, he finally confessed “Julia rarely goes down on me anymore. She did a few times before we got married. Lately, she acts like she doesn’t even like to see my dick.”

Why wouldn’t she like to see his dick? I thought. I myself hadn’t seen Keith’s dick. At least I could admit to myself that I wanted to.

“Women are different, I think. They like dick, I’m sure, but are less open about it than gay guys, I guess. I don’t know,” I told him. Another beer down the hatch and I revealed to him “gay guys want to see dick and touch them all day, just like straight guys want to see tits and pussy constantly.”

“That makes sense,” he said. “I probably should’ve been gay. Might be easier and get my dick sucked more often.”

I shrugged. “It doesn’t always work like that, but I doubt you’d have a problem.”

These talks continued for a long time as his marital woes grew. Finally, one day at lunch, the inevitable happened: he and Julia were divorcing for emotional distance and poor chemistry. Hardly a surprise. Seeing him relieved, but sullen made me sad. As a good friend does, I snapped him out of it with “well now you’re free to find somebody who’ll suck your dick.” That made him laugh, and whether he was aware I was willing to suck him off in the interim, I don’t know. 

A month later, Keith called me. I had been complaining about my lunatic roommate, an asexual slob with a 12-inch cock who drew erotic images of woodland creatures with human erections. Weirdest motherfucker I ever knew. I wanted to strangle the ex-roommate who vouched for him.

As a convenient surprise, Julia kept the house and Keith decided to get an apartment, asking me to be his roommate. I readily agreed for obvious reasons and about a month later, we moved into a new 2-bedroom walkup. Everything went swimmingly for quite a while, though as sometimes happens with people who share a living space, they get annoyed with each other. There were a few guys I had hooked up with, including a handful of strangers. He was justifiably uncomfortable with that, as I felt the same way with some of the women he’d have over. 

I admittedly harbored a bit of jealousy when he told me a female co-worker had given him a blowjob after a holiday party at his new job at a Christian charity. Apparently, she was a seasoned woman who was quite good at it. I was happy that he enjoyed it, but the idea she had not only seen his cock, but sucked it, drove me a little crazy. He revealed that she wasn’t happy when he jizzed and got some in her mouth. “Not everyone appreciates the little joys in life!” I said. Keith laughed.

At that time, I was a physically shy guy by nature, rarely disrobing in front of anyone except for sex. Keith asked if I’d like to come to a New Year’s Eve party at a friend’s and I agreed. There were more people there than I was comfortable with, so I eased the anxiety with screwdrivers. Shortly after the ball dropped, I was quite buzzed, but queasy. Fortunately, Keith was ready to go home and sleep. Just outside the breezeway, I puked. Keith helped me up the three flights of stairs while I was saying random goofy shit.

Upstairs, I shuffled unsteadily to my room and took off my shirt and pants. I was about to drop onto my bed when Keith came in with a glass of water and some aspirin. He had also discarded his shirt. “Oh sorry,” he said, “didn’t realize you were almost naked.”

He had seen me briefly without a shirt before, but not quite this much. I flashed him a drunken grin as my dick thumped in my boxers. “Another minute and it wouldn’t have been almost, and my dick would be hanging here in front of you.”

Keith shrugged. “Wouldn’t bother me. I lived in a frat house for a while and guys were naked all the time.”

Alcohol always made me too honest. “I’m fucking jealous. I’d love seeing dick all over the place like that. But I guess I’ll settle for nipples right at the moment,” I admitted through a drunken haze.

Keith chuckled, realizing I meant his, and no doubt noticed my stiffy. “Well get some sleep. Gonna go hit the hay myself.” 

I laid down and turned off the lamp. My head had stopped spinning, but I was still buzzed. I fantasized for a moment that Keith found a little pleasure in noticing my hard-on. I knew that wasn’t true in reality, but my dick turned to rock, and I jerked off fervently, splashing my hairy chest with a few white ribbons of cum. 

Months later, it was summer again. Keith had dated a girl for a few months and for whatever reason, it didn’t work out. He often seemed a little depressed and just not himself, then one day he brightened up a bit, though his mood still seemed a bit off. We ordered a pizza and watched The Terminator. He sipped on a large goblet of wine, then poured another after the credits rolled. We talked about the movie for about two minutes, but I picked up on a touch of anxiety.

Keith took a breath. “So, can I talk to you about something? Nothing bad. It’s just a little weird and kind of embarrassing.”

Being the kind of friend who can be told practically anything, I said “Sure,” thinking it would be about some girl he fucked or other personal problem.

He stammered for a moment before it poured out. “Well…I had a strange dream last night, and you were in it.”

“Me?” I asked, surprised. “What kind of dream?”

He paused, holding his wine in one hand and stroking his chin nervously with the other. “I’ll just be plain. I dreamt about New Year’s Eve when I walked into your room and you were undressing, but…in the dream you were completely naked and stroking yourself.”

 “Oh,” I said, stunned and not knowing how to follow that.

He gazed into the goblet, swirling the crimson wine around. “The thing is, I wanted to look. It’s like my sexual orientation was completely the opposite of what it is in real life. I was enjoying it, and I felt this urge to take my clothes, too. In the dream, I wanted you to see me naked.”

I was a little embarrassed, but as usually happened, my dick was doing its own thing in my shorts while my face got hot. “Damn, that certainly wasn’t what I was expecting.”

Keith continued. “Sorry, this is awkward. I’d pondered even telling you about it, but it just keeps going through my mind. In the dream, we touched each other and kissed and everything. What’s fucking with me is I keep imagining what it would be like for real.”

“Really?” I said, shocked, but also excited at the idea. My cock continued to stiffen at the idea of seeing his whole naked body.

Keith nodded his head while lifting his eyebrows, still gazing into his wine. “Yeah. I mean…and you can be honest…have you wanted to see me, my dick and all?”

I nearly hesitated. “Well, I am a gay guy, so yeah, for a while now, but trying to keep my thoughts in check.”

Keith grinned. “I know what you mean. I have female platonic friends and I’ve thought about them naked but then mentally slap myself on the wrist.”

My curiosity at its peak, I wanted to see if he had a bluff to call. “So, if I came over there and pulled your shorts down, you wouldn’t stop me?”

“Hold on,” Keith said, before gulping the rest of his wine and sighing. “I guess not.”

That was my cue. Awkward as it was, I moved toward him, mutually exchanging coy glances. My erection was clearly evident from the outline in my gym shorts. 

Keith had mentioned on occasion that he possessed a big dick. I was never really a size queen, but always curious just how big he meant. “You’re sure now, right?” 

Keith nodded and stood up. My heart pounded. I was finally going to see my buddy’s cock after all this time. I was never an overly assertive guy but felt weirdly in charge of the situation. “Take off the shirt since you hardly ever wear one anyway.”

Keith obliged, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the floor. My dick hardened even more.

I slowly knelt until I was at eye level with his treasure trail. I slipped each thumb into the edges of his shorts, working them in to make sure I had the boxers too. I pulled them down easily and his light brown pubic patch gave way to a dazzling sight.

Keith’s penis dangled before me in its full glory; it wasn’t a monster cock, but certainly hefty, with a commendable flop factor. His voluminous balls were suspended nicely behind his cock with the promise of high load storage.  

I figure he’d have a pretty one, but goddamn, it was beautiful with excellent circumcision work to showcase its perfect head. He gazed down at me, playfully smiling. “What do you think? You like it?”

“Oh, hell fuckin’ yeah I like it. It’s really pretty. Great balls, too,” I replied. I could’ve examined it for hours on end. 

“I’m strangely turned on by this,” he said, adding “you can touch it if you want. You wanna just go to my room?”

I didn’t know what all he had in mind or how far it would go, but I agreed without hesitation, and followed him to his room, his sweet-looking ass being a visual bonus. Keith had never seen my cock, either, but I wondered in his buzzed state if he wanted to or was at least curious. Mine was raging, threatening to soak my boxers with jizz, and it wanted out to play.

At the edge of the bed, he turned around, his cock dangling freely with a hint of chub around the head. I really wanted that thing in my mouth.

 “So, you like seeing me naked, huh? Bet your dick is getting hard.”

I nodded affirmatively. He sat on the bed and motioned me to come over and join him. He started lightly caressing his cock with his left hand and it began to puff. “Looks like I’m growing a bit down here.”

 My heart pounded harder. The eye of his cock seemed to look up at me as his shaft thickened. Keith was getting full-on drunk and hornier by the minute. I was still afraid to go too far too fast, but Keith took my hand and put it on his pulsating meat.

It felt surreal that I was stroking my friend’s erection, its sweet, warm head throbbing inside my palm. I was worried he was going to cum too soon and all of this would be cut short, but he then laid back on the bed, spread out with that hard dick pointing north and lining up with this treasure trail. 

I fell backwards as well and turned on my side to face him. I ran my hand up his thigh and cupped his warm balls. I rotated my thumb between and around his weighty testicles. Much to my surprise, he grabbed the back of my head and brought my lips to his. I never expected us to kiss, but he was oddly into it while I stroked him slowly. 

His breathing and enthusiasm intensified. I couldn’t believe he hadn’t cum, but glad he was saving it. He paused for a moment and said “this feels really fuckin’ good. I’m know I’m drunk, but really fuckin’ don’t care that you’re a guy.”

With that cue, I peeled my shirt off and pressed my furry chest against his while I kissed him. I moved my hand from his cock to lightly pinch his left nipple. He moaned, soon burying his face onto my neck and raking his hands up and down my back. 

 “You’re making my goddamned dick so hard,” he uttered through a heavy breath. “I bet yours is hard, you horny bastard. I want to see it. Take the rest of it off.”

 I lifted my hips to push my shorts and underwear off. A string of precum stretched from my dick to my departing boxers like a liquid bridge before snapping.

My cock was hard as a tire iron. It pointed towards Keith as if to say hello while my balls rolled to my thigh. I clutched myself and stroked it lightly while he looked on with an approving smirk. “Good looking dick. I was always a little curious about it. Weird I know coming from a straight guy.” He reached down and give my cock a tug. “That doesn’t feel too bad, really.”

I was worried this was where his curiosity would end, and the fun would be over. I didn’t want to go so far as to jeopardize our friendship, but I really wanted to suck him. 

I didn’t wait for his lead. I took the initiative to resume the kissing and he got right back into it, as intensely as it had been before my cock came out. He even put his face on my chest and sucked on one of my nipples, to my shock. His dick was like an overheated rocket, raging with an overdue countdown.

Even though I ultimately knew what the answer would be, I doubted for a moment, even though he was smashed. Rolling the dice, I asked “So, want me to suck it?” 

“Really?” he asked. He was feigning surprise or maybe just being coy. After all, I had shared anecdotes about my then-brief, but notable history of cocksucking. 

“You know I will. Lay back on your pillow.”

Keith obliged immediately, parting his thighs with that swollen meat missile ready for prime time. I had to bring my A-game to his cock and give him a blowjob for the ages. 

Not even two seconds after I grabbed his cock and wrapped my lips around it, he unleashed a robust moan as if he hadn’t been sucked in years. He clutched at his sheets, and I pulled his cock deeper into my throat. I intended to engulf every possible inch of it. I also rubbed his cock all over my face and forehead. I could’ve done this for days.

Keith’s cock, delicious as it was for the main entree, his balls were equally tasty—supple to my tongue and perfectly formed with a taut but soft sac. He writhed almost violently, and I wondered if anyone had ever licked his balls before. 

Still surprised he hadn’t cum, I returned to sucking his cock with aplomb vigor. “Keep that up and you might get a nice surprise,” he’d tell me, to which I’d reply, “I like surprises.”

 He steadily grew more engaged, placing his hands on my head to guide the motion, groaning more and more, racing closer to ejaculation. My lips encircled his throbbing cock head with my tongue fiercely teasing his slit. I craved his cum, almost in tears for the anticipation while I pumped his shaft. 

“I’m fucking close. Want my cum?” he asked. I signaled back with an eager, animalistic grunt that I was ready to be fed. 

His breath quickened, his shaft impossibly stiffening further. Volcanic torrents of thick pearl nectar exploded like liquid pistons firing at my tonsils. I continued to pump it as he trembled, releasing even more geysers of his salty load onto my tongue. 

His viscous semen churned in my mouth. It was the best cum I had ever had, and even hotter coming from him. I had nearly ejaculated without even a finger on my own cock. I heartily gulped, it almost took two, allowing his load to warmly flood my stomach. 

I couldn’t hold my cum any longer. I rolled up on my knees and beat my cock just below his rib cage. My balls swelled under the base of my shaft. He watched as I expelled several ropey shots of cum onto his belly. Still in a state of cum-thirsty euphoria, I licked some of it from his skin, then teasingly stroked my lower lip with a finger. That provoked an unexpected reaction from him, his eyes twinkling with a perverse gleam. He raised his right arm and grabbed the back of my neck, bringing my face down to smear it into the sticky strands of semen on his belly. I didn’t fight it but was a little stunned.

 “Damn,” he uttered, “Julia never sucked my cock like that, and she sure never took my cum. Maybe I should’ve let you do this sooner.”

“Holy shit, buddy, that was a fucking truckload of cum,” I said, smiling, knowing damn well I’d do it again if he asked.

He grinned mischievously. “That was the surprise, Tony.”

Our breathing mutually slowed and we had the inevitable “we’re not going to feel weird and awkward” conversation while our cocks slowly went flaccid. We each went to bed. I don’t know what was going through his mind, but I had a little anxiety that this was a mistake. I stared at the ceiling in disbelief that I even saw his dick, much less that I even sucked it and had his DNA floating around in my body. I jerked off again thinking about it before I finally dozed off. 

This was the beginning of a months-long sexual odyssey with my friend Keith.