Straight Friend giving me a HARD time

Kevin had been my best of best bud since second year of college. We had literally done everything together, had countless times where we had so much fun, drink nights, road trips, you name it. We were finishing each other's sentences. Talk of inside jokes and all. Our families then naturally became friends because of the frequent sleepovers we were having. 

Now we were in our fourth year of college and I had known Kevin for two wholesome years, every secret, weakness, strength and what bored him and what made him happy. I loved this man to the depths and I was willing to do anything to keep on having this friendship last till we had our own families. However, there was some predicament! Though Kevin knew me, he didnt know my greatest secret. That I was gay! Kevin was not necessarily homophobic but he has some kind of "resentment". I kept my secret solid hard. But well that became difficult every day because I was slowly but surely falling for my bestfriend.

Now the worst thing then fell upon us. It was a chilly Fall Night. We were going to have a drink in with the boys in the campus halls of residence. There was a lot of fun, a lot of drinks and a lot of weed. We indulged in every bit of it all. By midnight we were super wasted and had to find our way back to Kevins room where I was squatting for the meanwhile since I wasn't staying in the school residence. Kevin had a roommate but he had gone home for the weekend. That didnt stop us from sharing his single bed because, why not? We were used to sharing beds. 

This night was a particularly odd one. We thought we were going to just knock off quickly but no. We then started talking about gay jokes and he was facing up in the dark room. We were both shirtless and I was struggling to stay awake. He then asked, "what if we were actually gay but we didnt know it?"

I Then chuckled and said, "how would we possibly know anyway?"

He laughed and said, "well there is only one way of finding out"

Slowly he started drawing his hand towards my dick and instictively i became super hard. He started stroking. I was breathing right on top of my lungs. He started going faster and I had to touch his dick too. He was sooo hard it turned me on. I became so alert and forgot that I was actually wasted.

We foreplayed and he went down and started sucking my dick with passion. I reciprocated. Then he turned me and took some lotion that was on the table and stuffed my ass and he slid right into my ass. I am a top but had to give him the way because I wanted him. I had a crush on him. He forced his way into my virgin ass as I moaned passionately. He stroked and stroked till he started cumming right on my ass. 

Soon after he came. He wiped himself up and then turned the other way without a word. Then within a few minutes. He started snoring. Well that was weird. I slept with a smile on my face not knowing this was the beginning of the end of a relationship we had worked so hard to build. 

The following morning was the most difficult. We couldnt talk we couldnt face each other. I went home and thought that by Monday all would be well.

And yep. Monday came and we couldnt hold a 3 minute conversation. Days went past by. Then months then now we are liked strangers. He resents me. I do too. I am mad at him and myself for having to fall for the temptation. I try to gather myself up to talk about it with him but he isnt the type. 

I have to move on and find a new best friend. Hopefully He will come around.