Today is just like any other day, I have just gotten off work at my boring job as a lower level engineering inspector. Everyday, Monday through Friday, I get up and go to whatever construction site I am needed at to ensure that the designs my company has created for a project are implemented correctly during construction. Everyday, for 10-12 hours a day I sit there and record numbers. The hours and minutes drag ever so slowly as I sit and watch them all work. My mind often wonders thinking about all the places I would rather be, maybe the cute guys I had seen the night before that don’t even know my name. Perhaps this job would not be so mind-numbingly boring if there were any cute ones, but alas there are not, not my type anyway. One of my friends at one of the contractors is always asking me my opinion on the guys on site.
“What about that one? She always says.
“No, he is gross” I almost always say in a bored tone.
“Aw come on now, I would let him do whatever he wanted.”
“His teeth are so gross and he drinks way too many of those nasty energy drinks, no thanks, not for me”.
“Well that doesn't bother me!” She exclaimed.
“Well I know you will do what you want, you always do!” We both laughed.
When is my clean jock gay guy going to come into my life I always wonder to myself. When I get home I write my report for the day documenting all the work that has been done like I am back in school with homework to do. I write my report and send it off to the project manager, the manager for this particular project is a pain in the ass and not the kind I would prefer. He always calls me to ask me about every detail or berate me for a tiny mistake that I make on the report declaring it “unreadable and confusing beyond measure”. I wish he would just leave me alone.
Once I am done with my report I change my clothes to get ready for a run, I try to run 3-5 times a week and I was in my prime pretty fast. In high school I ran for 2 years at the state cross country championship placing pretty high up. Now I just run more for fun running usually 8-15 miles depending on the day. I change into my usual running outfit, dry fit shirt, baseball hat, shorts and my running shoes and head out the door. The weather is beautiful, it is a beautiful fall day in October, just one day before my 24th birthday, 60 degrees and a few clouds. The miles breeze by at a comfortable pace as I settle into a rhythm and clear my head of thought, running has always been good for me to do that. After about half an hour I slip into a runner's high, my legs flow underneath me effortlessly, my heart beats at a constant rhythm and I get that feeling that I can just keep on running forever. Soon I look down at my watch, 8 miles have passed so I turn around back through the neighborhoods making a loop out of it.
Back at my apartment, which is just a small simple one bedroom apartment that serves my most basic needs. I pull off my sweaty shirt, pants and underwear to change into a jockstrap to look at myself in the mirror, I look so good in it. My body is shiny with sweat from my run and my abs are especially prominent. Anyone familiar with the term twink would describe me as much. I am pretty small, about 5’ 10” looking at least pretty toned. I am pretty proud of my six pack abs which I rub gently. Time for a shower and some dinner, a frozen pizza is my simple favorite to make. I take it over to the couch still wearing nothing but my jockstrap and turn on the TV. My phone buzzes and I look to see a text from a number I don’t recognize.
Hey Matt! It’s Ryan! How are you doing?
I froze out of excitement. Ryan, he was my roommate freshman and sophomore years of college as we were both studying to become engineers. I remember the day our school sent out our roommate assignments for the school year, they gave us the contact information so we could start to plan out our dorm room and communal stuff. The first thing I did was look him up on Instagram, it was pretty modest, no shirtless pictures, but I could tell he had some nice muscles on him. His face was oh so hot, he had dirty blonde hair, short on the sides and longer on the top with a full trimmed beard hugging his sharp perfect jawline. Well I certainly was not going to mind waking up to this in the morning before school that day.
Hey Ryan! I have been doing alright, just have this kind of boring job right now but it pays well, what about you?
Doing good, listen I am going to be in your area tomorrow and I know it is your birthday so why don't we meet up and I will buy you a drink. You in?
I could think of nothing better to do, I had been trying to come up with something to do for my birthday, but never came up with anything so why not hangout with an old friend so I quickly replied.
That sounds great, it will be good to see you again! When and where are you thinking?
7:00 p.m at the Brass Rail, be there.
I gave the message a thumbs up and sat there in my jock when I felt my cock begin to rise. Be there he said, so commanding. I thought of all those nights when he would get home from being out and I would watch him strip to his underwear to get ready for bed, always hoping he would turn towards me so I could see that bulge of his so I could fantasize about what was underneath, but it would only be a fantasy as I know, he is straight. Our entire time he was either chasing the girls around campus or being chased by them himself. I watched TV for a while when my eyes began to shut so I turned off the TV and got ready for bed dreading work the next morning, but thankfully tomorrow is Friday, my birthday and I will get to see my old friend.
*****
The alarm jolts me awake, 6:30 a.m, the first light just peeking through the window. I lay there for a few minutes dreading the day ahead but I remember, I got to see Ryan tonight, giving me enough motivation to get out of bed still wearing nothing but my jockstrap, it really is most comfortable underwear and I may as well wear it under all my work clothes, just to add a little excitement to my day on the construction site. It’s the little things.
Driving to the site I can not help but think about Ryan, it has been a little over a year since we had last done anything together having used to be nearly inseparable. I think of the first day I actually got to meet him in our freshmen year dorm. We had been talking for over a month beforehand over text so we were somewhat familiar with each other.When I got to our room his side was already fully moved into, but no Ryan in sight. I began quietly moving my stuff into the room, turning my head towards the door every time I thought I heard somebody coming, anxious to finally see this man. After some hauling stuff up from the car, unboxing stuff there was wrestling at the door and I turned to look when he walked in.
“Hey there, I am Ryan. You must be Matt?”
“Hi Ryan…yeah…I’m Matt” I said slightly exasperated.
He was even more gorgeous in person then he was on his Instagram. His shirt was tight around his arms and barrel chest. I still wonder to this day if he caught me looking. Those deep blue eyes staring into my own. I could not believe that is who I was going to be living with for the next school year. Our families had gone out to dinner that night together and when we returned to the dorm room we could just sit back and talk. What we talked about I don’t remember, probably just getting to know each other better. What burned into my memory in the best possible way was when it was time for bed. He had gotten up and faced away from me and pulled off his pants and threw them on the couch. He had an ass to die for, nice round big cheeks, too bad underwear was covering them up. Then he pulled off his shirt to reveal more of that muscle in person that I had thirsted over for a month now. It was a spectacular site. His body flared out the higher he went, not too big and perfect topped by round buff shoulders. He reached for the ladder at the end of his bed, his powerful arms flexing as he pulled himself up. I could not help but stare and watch. He got into his bed and looked down at me sitting on the ground looking at him.
“Goodnight Matt, I will see you tomorrow.”
I arrive on the site and my friend is there waiting for me.
“Hey! Happy Birthday!”
“Thanks!”
“You got any fun plans for the weekend?” she asked, winking.
“Yeah I do actually, going out with my old college roommate to a bar tonight.”
“Ooh is he cute?”
“Oh yeah, he is so fucking hot” I say without even thinking about it.
It just came out of me, I didn't mean to say it, but of course it was true. He was hot and I realized how much I miss being with him all the time.
“Well good then! I hope you two have fun, I am trying to get a proposition of my own for this evening, I just have to decide which one I want to have” and she turned on her heels no doubt in search of that proposition.
The day was going by slowly, even more slowly than it usually does. The machinery that I was watching kept having one break down after another so I just sat there distracted and reminiscing about college. Like for most people that time was a period where you do a lot of growing up and it was the same for me too. Despite the way I looked at Ryan the first time I met him and that night I got to see him in his underwear I did not think I was gay, that seems so naive now, but there was a part of me that didn't want to believe that was true, and now I am ashamed I could even think that. I had even gotten a girlfriend, the major I was in was small so maybe there were some feelings there out of just close proximity, but maybe also to prove to myself I wasn't gay. Instead, getting a girlfriend did just the opposite, it proved to myself that I was gay. There was no way I had thought to myself that I could be with a woman for the rest of my life so I broke up with her.
Once I knew I was gay I had to tell someone, but I still wanted to keep it a secret, but who do I tell. Of course, there is the one person who knew more about me than anyone else, Ryan. That weekend he and I were planning on camping in the mountains together. Maybe this would be the time I tell him. We could be alone, just him and I, no one else had to know my secret. That night, under a starry night we sat there in silence watching the milky way glide overhead.
“Hey Ryan, I have to tell you something, it is important”
“Sure man, what is it?”
“You have to promose…” I exhaled.
“You have to promise not to tell anyone, this is really hard for me to say”
“Dude, relax, it is okay, it's just me. There is nothing for you to be nervous about”
I started to shake, I was so nervous. What would he think? Would he just leave? Would he make fun of me? But, I had to say it, for my own good.
“I’m…I’m…I am gay.”
“Really?”
“Yeah I just…well you are the first person I have ever told and I hope that…well I hope this doesn't make things weird..” he stopped me.
“Matt, that is alright I understand this is a big deal for you and it doesn't make things weird. You are my best friend and the fact that you are gay doesn't change a thing.”
I cried and he wrapped his arm around me.
“Hey it's alright” he said in a reassuring tone.
“Thanks, Ryan. I am so glad I could tell you that”.
He always had a way of reassuring me that things were okay in a way that I always felt safe around him.
“Matt!”
I look up to see one of the construction workers standing there.
“Oh yeah hey, sorry I didn't see you”
“Are you a good man, you look like you have just seen a ghost?”
“Oh yeah I am good, I was just thinking”
“Alright well, I wanted to tell you that the drill rig is going to be down for the rest of the day with a hydraulic leak so you don’t need to be here anymore.”
“Oh okay great, well have a good weekend I guess and I will see you on Monday.”
“Hey you as well man, see you next week”
I get up and head to my car and look at my watch, only 1:15, a short Friday, the best kind of Friday and time for a run. I head home and change into my running clothes and head out the door still with my dirty jock underneath. I wonder what people would think if they saw me running down the street in nothing but a pair of running shoes and a jockstrap. I am sure at least someone would enjoy it. 90 minutes and 11.5 miles later I return back to my place to take a shower. I dry myself on and realize I didn't bring an outfit into the bathroom with me to change into, oh well. I guess I will just go naked for now. I sit down and write my report naked just to add a little excitement as this is the most boring part of the day, plus I want nothing on my plate work wise before the weekend starts and nothing on my mind when I go to see Ryan tonight. I look at the time, only 4:30, time to kill. I sit back on my couch and turn on the TV, a nature documentary about Yellowstone, perfect.
It does not take long for my mind to wander back to Ryan again. I think about all those times after that first night where he would strip to his underwear. I would make it a point to be there when he was getting ready for bed just to catch a glimpse. One particular night, before I came out to him, I think he may have felt me watching him and he turned around to look at me. He smiled and just made a little pose where I could see his beautiful chest and washboard abs.
“Sorry” I said.
“I was just thinking”
“You are alright Matt, I figured I would strike a little post to snap you out of it”.
“Thanks” I said laughing.
I looked down at my crotch. My dick was rock hard pointing straight up just thinking about him begging for attention. I need to calm down, I thought to myself. He is straight and a good friend, I just need to focus on that. The next couple hours were uneventful, I sat there watching TV as the time slowly ticked by watching the geysers and bears of Yellowstone flashing on the screen.
I woke up with a jolt, having not realized I had even fallen asleep and looked at the time 6:49. Shit I thought to myself the bar is 15 minutes away. I reach over to my phone and text Ryan:
Sorry I just woke up, going to get ready and will be like 10 minutes late.
He texts back almost immediately.
Alright Matt, get here as soon as you can. I saved you a seat at the bar.
Yes sir.
Yes sir? Why did I write that back? I run into the bedroom to find some clothes. Shorts and a t-shirt will do and open my underwear drawer and look into it, mostly boxers and one clean jockstrap. I reach in and grab a pair of the boxers but stop putting it on half way up my legs, something tells me that I should wear that jock. I slip the pair back off and into the drawer and slide the black jock over my legs then the shorts and t-shirt and head out the door. 6:55, should only be 10 minutes late.
My heart was pounding so hard I could feel it in my chest ready to burst out. What is wrong with me I asked myself? It is just Ryan, there is nothing to be afraid of. This will be great to catch up with my old friend. I had the time to calm myself down, of course I hit every red light on the way to the bar, delaying me further as the time continued to tick by, 7:11, 7:12. Finally I get a parking spot and head into the bar at 7:14.
“There he is! The birthday boy!” I heard Ryan exclaim before I even spotted him!
“Ryan, it is so good to see you man”
Ryan gets up from his spot at the bar, his arms open for a hug. He is wearing a tight shirt with the top few buttons open, and the sleeves barely containing the muscle in his arm, certainly no complaints from me to get to see that. His face looks even more gorgeous than I remember, a dirty blonde 5 o'clock shadow my favorite. His hair was much longer now, curling at its ends, a good change I think. I open my arms to him and we embrance. Oh how he feels so good as I wrapped my arms around him, his body hard with all that muscle and I enjoy one of the few chances I get to feel back there. His arms around me I can feel their girth, possibly even bigger since that last time I saw him.
“Well come sit down, what are you drinking? A margarita?”
“Yeah that would be great!”
“Ha I thought so, I am buying” He waves the bartender over.
“One margarita for my boy here.” Ryan says.
His boy? In my dreams, I thought.
“You changed your hair I see”
“Yeah, do you like it?”
“Fuck yeah I do, it looks hot” I say, slightly surprised that came out of my mouth.
I seem to lack my filter whenever Ryan is the subject.
“Good I am glad, that means a lot coming from you.”
The bartender brings over my margarita and we begin to catch up.
“So Matt, what has been going on with you?”
“Oh well it is pretty boring if you even care.”
“Of course I care Matt, besides I have got all night”
“Well I kind of hate my job to be honest with you. I don’t remember if I told you all the details or not but I got this geotechnical engineering job and all I do all day every day for the foreseeable future is sit there for 10-12 hours a day watching a drill rig drill holes into the ground and fill that hole with concrete and steel piles. That is it, every day. Then I get home and write a report about it, like back to school for homework. On top of that, my project manager is an ass hole micromanager always calling me asking me shit. I don’t know man, I can’t keep doing this forever. I feel like I have no time to do anything fun like you and I used to do together and it is really starting to drain me. I am hoping, desperately hoping that something else comes along. Well anyway what about you?”
“Damn I am sorry man, that sucks. Personally I have been doing great actually. I had this relative, some uncle I never met who never got married or had any kids who died and I was on his will so I have come into some money, I have invested quite a bit of it, but using some of it to have some fun. I also have decided to actually move out here! I am actually going to look at houses tomorrow.”
“No way! You are moving out here, that is fantastic we can start hanging out again!”
“Absolutley! I am staying in a hotel just around the block from here for the next few nights while I figure out a place. I was kind of in the same boat as you with my job not too long ago, I was sick and tired of it and this gave me a way out to go to someplace new and try something different, plus I already have my best friend out here so there is even more of an excuse.”
Hearing him say that brought warm feelings to me. We can relive the glory days of college and hangout again, go out, get drunk, go hiking. The possibilities seem endless in my mind.
We continued chatting for hours. Reminiscing about our college days, the tiny 100 square foot dorm room we both shared our sophomore year, the shitty professor we had for Chemistry II, late nights playing video games and drinking way too much. It went on for hours and the margaritas just kept coming. Ryan starts to talk about his family and I am looking at him, but not listening to the words he says. He is just so beautiful and his chest is sitting there in the open, mocking me. I hope he doesn't catch me looking at it.
“Well do you need another drink?” Ryan asks.
“No no thanks, I am good I should start returning back to Earth”
“Haha well it is your birthday you can go all out, but I understand. So how is your love life, meet any cute guys lately”
“Oh please” I say.
“Well…I guess there have been a few that I have tried but none of them really worked out for more than a couple of dates or maybe even just a hookup. The guys out here have been pretty disappointing. You know me Ryan, I need some muscle gay jock to come into my life who is not completely self obsessed, not dumb as a rock and will completely dominate me in the bedroom. Well what about you Ryan, have you been chasing girls around like usual?”
“Haha yeah well, yes and no. There is one I have been chasing for a while now, but I don’t know if I am brave enough to go for it you know, like damn it sucks because it just seems so out of reach.”
“Must be someone special then, but come on man, you are one of the best looking guys I know, you of all people ought to be able to get this woman, whoever she is and she would be lucky to have you.”
“Yeah I hope you are the right man, but the only thing is if I go for it, it will change everything for me and my entire life would be turned upside down.”
“What the fuck does that mean?” I asked.
“Well I...I don’t know man.”
“What do you mean you don’t know, spit it out right now, it's my birthday and I want to know.”
“Well I…okay… just you have to promise not to tell anyone.”
“I mean yeah of course, I don’t even understand what you are trying to tell me.”
“Okay okay.” He takes a deep breath.
“The woman that I really want…well she isn't…she isn't who you think she is, she is actually…a he.”
“Oh shit dude, woah, like fuck. So are you like bi?”
“No Matt, I am gay. I have wanted to tell you that for so long, once you told me you were gay I was jealous that you could realize and accept that about yourself and I couldn't yet. You are the first person I have told.”
“Wow, I mean congratulations are in order man, this a huge step. How long have you known?”
“For a long time, probably since elementary school, but I held those feelings back. Denied them, thought they could not be real, even pretended to myself and for others to be this guy who could get any woman he wanted, but that is just not the case and I have grown tired of denying it.
“Wow dude, you know I know exactly how you feel and I am so glad you told me”
“Yeah I know you know and that is what makes me feel more comfortable and less afraid”
“So who is the lucky man then of your pursuits?”
“Well honestly I would prefer to talk about that someplace a little more private? Did you park close? We could go sit in your car?”
“Uh yeah alright, but if we go anywhere you have to drive there is no way I can do that”
I get up out of my chair and stumble over, but Ryan catches me to hold me steady.
“Take it easy there, I have you, there is nothing you need to worry about” he says to me.
Just as he said to me that night when I came out to him. As he is waving the bartender down to pay the tab my brain starts to catch up with what just happened. Ryan, the man I have thirsted over for almost 6 years, the man who was always getting girls, is gay and now we are going to my car to talk about it. Is the man he has been chasing, is it me? No no, of course it can’t be me I tell myself, get that idea out of your head. I feel him grab my shoulder.
“Are you ready to go?”
“Ready as I will ever be.”
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