Sex?

Sex, Me? I look around as if someone else might be there. I know there is no one else there but was he actually talking to me?

This beautiful man with his dark brown hair swept down over his forehead and his chestnut eyes smiling this ridiculously beautiful smile. I don't know what to say. I have gone into a state of total shock.

Okay, get it together, He knocks on my door. He has a flat tire. He doesn't get a signal here on his cell I don't either. Do I have a land line? Yes I do. Please come in. Oh shit he is hot. He knows I am gawking with my mouth hanging open. I can't seem to help it.

He is about five ten, one fifty. Thin and trim. Skin the color of caramel. It actually hurts to look at him. I don't know what to do or think or feel. I just want to look at him. He blushes for a second. I apologize profusely telling him that he just caught me off guard and he is welcome to use my phone.

After he calls his friends we talked a little and I was just opening a bottle of wine that I was not really in the mood for anyway when he showed up, so I asked him if he wanted a glass? He was grateful for something to drink. He had been hiking and had gotten lost for about three hours and finally found his car when he got near town where I lived, he found himself with a flat and no spare.

I asked him to please make yourself comfortable, the bathroom is down the hall to the left and if you want some soda or tea it's right here to the right. He said I was being too kind. I told him I was raised to be kind to everyone, you never knew when you would be entertaining angels. I really thought I was. Hell I still do. It was unnatural how beautiful he was.

We sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes. I was thankful for those minutes because I was so confused as to what was going on in my head and my heart and my body. I felt something. Almost instantly, I just couldn't quite grasp what it was. Something like stepping onto a step that leads to a front door of a house you don't quite recognize but you know you have been there before. Familiar but strange at the same time.

We sat and chatted for a while. Just about our work and lives and just general getting to know each other things. The phone rings and it's for him. Pete his name is . I hand him the phone. His friend tells him he will be there but it will take a little while because he is at the hospital with is sister, she is having a baby. He told him it would be alright and to tell her he was thinking of her. I heard what he said and it made me smile.

He told me what was going on and I told him to relax he was safe and warm and I was going to whip up some dinner and we would just have a nice visit. It was actually a welcome diversion. I was getting tired of eating alone. He said he would help if he could. I poured him more wine and stepped into the kitchen. I could still see him and talk to him from where I was through this big open window between the kitchen and living room. It was an old house. Open and airy. Still he came and sat on a bar stool at the counter as I chopped some peppers and added some parsley. I was making some chicken with an alfresco sauce. Nothing special I just needed to use the cheese and cream before it went bad. I cook daily. I was taught by the most wonderful cook on the planet, my nanny. My Nanny was about the best cook I have ever witnessed.

She lived with me until she died last year. It was hard for a few months but she went peacefully and I knew she was ready.

I never could make her biscuits. My mom got that talent. I think my sister did too but she is so wrapped up in her own self she does not really see what she is missing in the real world.

Pete just sat there. Looking . He seemed so relaxed and well just belonged. I knew I had really fallen for him. I would just accept that some things were not to be and go with my life. I loved the way he smiled when I diced and chopped. Like he saw I was doing some things most guys could not. My Nanny was a chef. And so was I.

He asked me a few questions about myself like where I grew up and I answered him. I told him of my family and my friends and my education. He did the same not holding anything back we talked about our lives and relationships.

The conversation was easy and flowing like water it just swept along. He told me he had a long term relationship that ended abruptly so did I. I admitted there was times I was glad to see it end because I felt I was holding him back. He looked at me kind of wide eyed and said, 'him'? I said yeah and went on with my cooking. He smiled I noticed, but he didn't see,

He then told me that his boyfriend of three years became distant and wanted to invite friends over to have sex and he didn't even know these guys. He felt like he had to let him go. I understood him completely because I had felt the same way after ten years with a guy who wanted to try something new. I knew I could not share him because I was his and he was mine. He was five years younger than me and we met when he was just eighteen . He hadn't lived his life yet. I let him go. It almost killed me. I was in a deep depression for a few years. Then life took over. Dad died, Nanny, Mom Life has been brutal. I felt like I was being punished for something I didn't do.

I decided to just let it happen and work as much as I could and learn from my past and just go on. I am here now. I live a quiet comfortable life. I work, and travel when I can. I haven't had a date in about two years but I don't miss it. I am happy with my self and that is a great deal more than I can say for a lot of people I have met.

Then it happened. Pete stood by the table and held his had out to me. I took it, I don't know why I just did. He told me that was the best meal he has ever had and he wanted to show me how much he appreciated it. He led me to the patio and we looked up at the stars. He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine . He looked deeply in my eyes and I could see into his very soul. He told me he was so scared he was not sure he could stand but he had to tell me he knew from the moment the door opened, and I looked at him. He fell deeply and passionately in love.

I knew within a millisecond what I was feeling. I t was love it was Home. I was home. I had never felt that before.

Peter asked me If I wanted to have sex. What? Are You Kidding? I can't think of anything more I want. Except you, here in the morning when I wake up an find this is not a dream.

Yeah pete, I wanted you t know a little about me.