At 21, I find myself doing a lot of the same things I did the first time I ever had sex.
It was the week before school began and I’d been horny all summer. My parents had found porn in my search history and I’d only recently gotten my phone back from them. My laptop had been kept locked in my dad’s office, and I was only permitted to use it for my required Honors English summer reading assignments while he or my mom watched. The porn they’d found hadn’t even been anything bad, some lame-o Sean Cody twink-on-twink scene. I’m sure the fact that it was men had bothered him more than the content itself, but still.
I found myself lying in bed, my bags from an earlier trip to the mall for back to school clothes sitting unopened on the floor as I scrolled through Grindr. I’d always been tall for my age - taller than both of my parents by middle school - and years of weightlifting with my dad had buffed me up big for my age. My profile was simple, just a towel pic with my face obscured in the steamy mirror and my body on display. I’d garnered a decent amount of responses, but none of the suburban men looked like any of the guys I saw in porn.
In my mind, my first time wasn’t going to be special. This was my trial run to get the kinks out before I fucked someone that mattered. Whoever fucked my ass for the first time didn’t need to be Prince Charming, but he definitely didn’t need to have pot belly. I scrolled through my Taps, spotting a guy in similar shape to me, and opened the message thread to see he’d already sent a few pics and his stats. He was hung and 3 miles away. His body was leaner than mine, more of a runners build compared to my gym build, but he had abs, which was all that mattered to me at that age.
We chatted back and forth for a half hour. His name was Shawn and he worked at the mall near my house. His shift ended in 2 hours. I shot my mom a text:
’Can you drop me @ the mall at 7? Gotta exchange a couple things.’
She said she could, so I told Shawn that we were on. He said we could meet in the dressing room of a lesser used area of the J.C. Penney in the mall. He knew the attendant and said we wouldn’t be bothered.
I hadn’t eaten all day in hopes I’d get fucked for the first time, so cleaning out didn’t take long. I pulled on something casual: American Eagle boxer briefs, cargo shorts, and my cousin’s frat t-shirt to look a little older. I ran some product through my light brown hair to tame it while it air dried, snapped a pic for Shawn so he’d know what I was wearing and finished getting ready.
By the time I made it to the mall, my stomach was in knots. This was scary in the most exciting way possible, like a rollercoaster where you couldn’t see the tracks. I was so turned on I could’ve see straight, my 7” uncut dick tucked into my waistband. I thanked my mom when she let me out at the mall’s front entrance, promising to meet her at the food court in an hour. I’d thrown some random empty cologne bottles in a bag to act as my “returns,” not that she’d even peeked inside to check.
I had about 2 minutes until my mom would be inside with the car, so I walked double time through the half-empty mall. It was one of the slower ones in the area, filled with mall walkers and screaming toddlers. I hooked a right by a children’s clothing boutique, J.C. Penney in my sight line. I breezed through the entrance, my heartbeat thrumming in my ears. I vaguely remembered where the dressing rooms were from childhood visits with my mom, and found them unstaffed as always. I tossed my fake returns in the nearby bin, walking toward the last dressing room. The air smelled like disinfectant and cotton, a strangely arousing scene that made my dick twitch. I knocked twice on the door before opening it and peeking my head inside.
Shawn sat on the grey metal bench with his jeans around his ankles, his big dick standing straight up in the air as he shot me a grin. I tried to match his easy confidence. He looked to be college age, his dark hair neat and clipped short. He had a wide curving mouth and a big nose that I wanted to hump.
“Dillon,” he said with an inclination of his chin, his voice a surprisingly deep baritone.
“That’s me,” I replied. My voice didn’t channel the nervousness I felt inside.
I walked toward him with a crooked grin, tugging my shirt off and hopping down on my knees. I looked up at him as I took his fat pink head between my lips. Unsure of what to do with my hands, I pushed his legs apart to give me more access to his shaft. Shawn had a square, boxers shaped tan line from his hips to his upper thighs, making his tan look even deeper. I took his cock halfway down, trying not to gag and show my inexperience. I had read somewhere that making a fist helped with your gag reflex, but it wasn’t working for me.
As if he could read my thoughts, Shawn brought one hand to the back of my head to stroke the short silky hairs. He carded his hand up through my hair, pressing my head down deeper on his cock as he thrust upward into my throat. My nose pressed flat into his bush, his pubes sticking up my nostrils as he choked back a moan. He held me there for what felt like 10 minutes but couldn’t have been more than 10 seconds before bringing me up. I gasped for air, lungs heaving, but the tenting in my shorts was undeniable.
Shawn continued to fuck my face, heedless of the thick white slime I drooled down his balls and crack every time his cock made me dry heave. I felt like a reverse sock puppet, my throat completely hollowed out with someone else operating it. Shawn didn’t talk much, which was disappointing, but he taught me how to hide my teeth when I gave head, something I’d never even considered in my years of watching porn.
Shawn pulled me off his cock with a deep groan, standing to his full and shuffling behind me as his pants pillowed around his ankles. He reached forward and wiped a big hand across my face, sluicing all that throat slime together before smearing it on my hole. Combined with the thick white layer of spit I’d left on his shaft, it provided a decent glide as he entered me. It burned like cold needles at first, and I felt like I was being stretched in two. Shawn tossed me his boxers to bite down on as he buried himself fully inside me. I saw stars when I felt his bush tickle my hole, my words coming in muffled unintelligible grunts through the sweaty cloth.
“It’ll feel good in a minute,” Shawn assured me, his hands clenching on my shoulders as he sped up his strokes. My legs were shaking beneath me as my head rammed the wall lightly with every stroke.
Shawn was right: it did feel good. I did my best to grind back on his cock to his whispered encouragement, grinding my hips in an hourglass motion as I brought them up and down.
“Fuck baby I’m gonna-“ he whispered harshly, spilling his cum deep in me. I hadn’t even considered a condom, but in that moment I didn’t care. I was covered in a thin sheen of sweat, my cock was leaking and my hole was full.
“You did a good job,” Shawn said, clapping me on the shoulder. He began to get dressed, eyeing my still hard cock. “I don’t suck dick man, sorry.” He was gone a minute later and I locked the door behind him
I looked at myself in the full-length mirror: abs flat, obliques carved, chest bulky. My parents still didn’t know about the nipple piercings Nikki Hayward had given me at summer camp, but they looked good now that they’d healed. If I squinted my eyes, I could almost pretend I was someone else and I jerked my desperate cock. The memory of being filled combined with the rough sensation of my hand had me shooting ropes onto the mirror within minutes. Usually I’d clean it up, but I figured I’d leave it for Shawn’s friend to clean. Mission accomplished.
I re-dressed and left the store, finding my mom in a shoe store a few doors down. I met up with her, telling her my return had taken longer than expected, and went about my day.
